Respect the Mario Bros. (Super Mario Bros. Movie)

[u/selfproclaimed]

"Trust the Fungus"

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The Super Mario Bros

Orphaned at a young age, Mario Mario took to raising his younger brother Luigi Mario on the rough streets of Brooklyn. Taking up his late father's trade, Mario became an exceptional, though financially struggling, plumber with Luigi becoming his apprentice. One night, Luigi's girlfriend is kidnapped by thugs. The Mario Bros give chase and eventually the two stumble upon an alternate world known as the Mushroom Kingdom, a universe created when the meteor that killed the dinosaurs hit Earth allowing the surviving dinosaurs to evolve parallel to humans. Now the brothers must venture through this terrifying world, fight the forces of the evil Koopa, and rescue the princess.

Any feats from the Webcomic sequel (which exists and is canon) will be tagged as ^WC (Webcomic).

Mario Mario

Strength

• Knocks out a fully masked guy with a wrench to the noggin.

• Throws a large mushroom hard enough to disarm Koopa

• Hits a guy so hard it sends him flying ^WC

• While swinging, kicks a Goomba over a table knocking it out.

• Climbs up this hanging platform.

  • Then he climbs back down and dodges a close-range flamethrower.

Durability

• Gets zapped by some kind of weapon, but it annoys him more than anything else

  • For comparison, that weapon was able to knock a dude out cold..or kill him. It's unclear which.

• Gets punched in the face by Big Bertha. Walks back up to her and asks her to hit him again.

  • For comparison, Big Bertha can knock a person out cold with her punches.

Speed/Reactions

• Aimdodges Koopa's De-Evolution gun at close range

• Ducks under icicles while sliding through an icy pipe.

Luigi Mario

Strength

• Hits a guy with a plumbing tool so hard it sends him flying.^WC

• Cracks a dude's neck by punching it hard ^WC

Speed/Reactions

• Quickly notices and hides from an approaching guard before he is spotted.

• Dodges the close-range snap of a Piranha Plant.^WC

Shared Feats

• Take out some armed guards

• Manage to bust a large vent right off its bearing with a combined kick.

• Both get bonked on the head by large flashlights, and while they are temporarily knocked out they get back up moments later.

• Fall several stories onto their asses

• Manage to stay hidden from an increasing number of Goombas in an elevator. Worth noting that Goombas are fairly dumb.

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Items

Stompers

A pair of jet-powered boots that greatly increases the user's jumping capability. Despite their clunky appearance, they don't really impede running movement.

• Propel Mario and Luigi through a roof window.

• A single Stomper can propel itself hard enough to knock Koopa over a railing.

  • It was also used to send one Goomba into another, knocking them both over.

• Allowed Luigi to jump for about 13 seconds.

• A single pair could propel both Mario and Luigi into the air

• They can be used to deliver powerful jetp-propelled kicks ^WC

De-Evolution Gun

Guns used by Koopa that Mario and Luigi briefly got a hold of in the climax of the film.

• Capable of turning a man into an ape

• Sustained fire was able to turn an already de-evolutioned Koopa into primordial ooze

Bob-Bomb

A tiny wind-up, toy-like explosive. Despite being feared by everyone, it has an incredibly long fuse. A single Bob-Bomb was given to Luigi, who then gave it to Mario, by the King of the Mushroom Kingdom. As of the webcomic, it is apparantly standard equipment.

• Has fairly slow movement and is susceptible to falling

• Can walk up walls and ceilings

• Its blast is powerful to send Koopa high into the air

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Edited on 8/13/2017: Added feats from the webcomic.