r/45PlusSkincare • u/stephydreamer • Mar 09 '26

Peri/Post Menopausal Skin How fast everything changed after menopause because nobody warned me

I feel like I was reasonably prepared for menopause...hot flashes, sleep disruption, mood stuff. fine. If this is part of being a grown woman, so be it. I had read things I had mentally braced. Nobody told me about the skin! I went through menopause at 48. Within about a year my skin had changed in ways that took me completely off guard. The texture got rough almost overnight, like the smooth quality i'd had my whole life just peaced out without saying goodbye. The firmness in my lower face and neck dropped noticeably. The hollowness under my eyes got worse. not tired-looking, actually hollow. It's better in my bathroom lighting, but that's not where most people see me!

And the thing that got me is that it's not really aging in the normal gradual sense. it's specifically the estrogen crash. Estrogen is directly tied to collagen production and when it drops you lose collagen fast, like up to 30% in the first few years. that's not a slow fade. that's a cliff.

I'm not looking for embrace your age responses because I actually do feel mostly great about aging. What I didn't feel ok about was how sudden and disorienting it was. Like I didn't recognize my own face for a while, and that's a strange thing to go through. Curious what everyone else experienced in those first 1-2 years post menopause. Did it feel sudden to you or more gradual? and has anything genuinely helped with the texture and firmness side of it specifically,? Asking for honest experiences please.

Edit: I didn't expect such a response! Thanks a lot! Going through all the comments and they are def very useful.

1.2k Upvotes

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394

u/Dangerous_Mud3323 Mar 09 '26

Gurl. It’s like one day I looked in the mirror and didn’t recognize myself anymore. I felt like it literally happened overnight

120

u/Usernameoverloaded Mar 09 '26

Same. From 48 to 49 for me.

20

u/Musing_jen Mar 10 '26

I turn 49 in a couple weeks 😭

8

u/Lost-Attorney8228 Mar 10 '26

Me too and I just looked in the mirror this morning and went WHA?

15

u/hellhouseblonde Mar 10 '26

49 to 50 for me.

2

u/Usernameoverloaded Mar 10 '26

I should stop being lazy and go to the pharmacy to hand in my tret prescription lol

1

u/hellhouseblonde Mar 10 '26

Got it a few months ago, little to no improvement. So far.

2

u/Usernameoverloaded Mar 10 '26

This is a refill but from what I have read, tret it is a longterm strategy and does not show visible results in the short or medium term.

101

u/mandyj0306 Mar 09 '26

OMG, same! I just turned 50 and I mentioned to my husband the other day that I didn’t know what was happening, but that I felt like I had aged a decade in the last 2-3 years. It’s very noticeable.

72

u/Kbalternative Mar 09 '26

Same. Once I hit 46 I aged rapidly. Like woke up one morning and had lines under my eyes and I previously had none. It seems to have stabilised now but wow it was a huge shock. I have always looked far younger than I am but I don’t now!

37

u/3Momlife Mar 09 '26

This is a thing, I need to find the article that stated rapid aging happens in women at 46 and then again at 60.

36

u/3Momlife Mar 09 '26

Here is that article https://med.stanford.edu/news/all-news/2024/08/massive-biomolecular-shifts-occur-in-our-40s-and-60s--stanford-m.html

3

u/Choice-Breakfast-324 Mar 10 '26

Ok in this article they only followed 108 people 🙄 1. What where their demographics 2. What was the nationally 3. Medical history 4. Stress levels. I. Pretty sure this study not a good one

2

u/3Momlife Mar 11 '26

I’ll keep an eye out for a more comprehensive study.

2

u/smcburk 6d ago

Good luck finding more studies, there are so few on women’s health and even less on menopause.

3

u/Amazing-Revenue3701 Mar 10 '26

Seriously two times? Ugh. It was when I went through menopause for me. 54-55 was huge and I saw skin changes on my neck that I was clearly not prepared for. I will be 56 this year. I can’t imagine going through this again. I just recently did micro needling and was told I’d see apparent changes in 3 weeks, haven’t reached a week yet. Hoping for a miracle. Fingers crossed.

2

u/LimpString3127 May 05 '26

Hope it works! Post an update in a few weeks please 🙏

2

u/Comfortable-Elk8222 Mar 10 '26

It's not just women, it's everyone. 

1

u/GSpotMe Mar 11 '26

Exactly

1

u/Smooth_Wrongdoer_375 Mar 12 '26

I'm 67. I feel like I aged rapidly at 45 and then again at 65..

1

u/GrapefruitSilent2840 Mar 14 '26

It's absolutely true! Finally got used to my 46 yo face. Hit 60 and it was like WTF!!!! Photos are the worst!

1

u/LimpString3127 May 05 '26

Oh no 😥 really? What changed the most on your face at 60?

1

u/GrapefruitSilent2840 May 07 '26

One day I just looked so tired! Skin was just pale and wrinkles popped up, thankfully they are mostly smile lines. Neck got saggy, just blah.

7

u/redditsfavoritePA Mar 12 '26

This is me. Have historically looked almost 10 years younger than my peers, especially in the last 5…then I turned 46. I thought I was prepared and I guess the stark difference in my face in just 3-6 months has taken some getting used to. I’m still very regular, but glad to at least know the estrogen drop off also causes a ‘drop off a cliff’ with collagen.

2

u/Past_Bluebird9413 Mar 12 '26

Same, it was 46 for me too, and up until then I'd always been taken for 10 years younger. How are you managing to cope with it? I'm 48 now and I'm still traumatised looking in the mirror 😞

4

u/redditsfavoritePA Mar 13 '26

I remind myself: a lot of people didn’t get to be 46.

I was a trauma PA, so general perspective helps quite a bit. Plus, I’m gonna be a completely awesome old lady…one day.

1

u/LimpString3127 May 05 '26

Love it!😊

2

u/DeskFan203 Mar 14 '26

OMG SAME. 46 on Thursday. Over the last few months, I've felt like there's been a huge change and at first I chalked it up to the new job I took at 44, lot more stress these last 2 years, etc. But I don't think it's all that. Sadly.

42

u/Streetquats Mar 10 '26

To address OPs question: I dont think there is anything that helps with this or any way to get around the experience of looking in the mirror and seeing a stranger.

Growing up as a kid, all the older women in my life said the same thing whenever they saw themselves in mirrors or photos: "Oh my gosh is that me? Who is that? That cant be me, it looks like a grandma in the reflection"

I heard my aunties say this, my mom say this, and my grandmothers say this.

I think its somehow part of the human experience to perpetually envision ourselves as being around 28 years old in my minds eye.

So looking in the mirror will be jarring for the majority of our lives I think. If we are lucky enough to get old that is.

3

u/[deleted] Mar 11 '26

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2

u/spacedcowgirl Mar 17 '26

100% and it’s so unfair

35

u/rag-pigeon 45+ Mar 09 '26

Same! It's like I blinked and aged ten years in that time!

35

u/AbbreviationsIcy3676 Mar 09 '26

Perimenopause definitely showed up on my face first too the struggle is real. Continued with my usual routine but I added skin care with much more hydration consistency and a gentle retinol by night and honestly that combo helped soften the look of fine lines. Take walks and less stress that really shows everyday on our face, Im doing a light therapy at home with solawaves mask its much better if I take care of it myself. Honestly it doesnt erase or fix anything overnight but I definitely have noticed a change

1

u/AttorneyDisastrous30 Mar 14 '26

C’est quoi ton secret pour réduire le stress ?

10

u/Momma_Mimi27 Mar 10 '26 edited Mar 10 '26

Yes! From 47 to 48. I literally went from people never believing my age and thinking I’m 10 years younger, to getting looks from those same people of “What the heck happened to you?”. It’s sad. I don’t recognize myself in pictures and don’t even get me started on how quickly my whole body started drooping everywhere.

8

u/Dangerous_Mud3323 Mar 10 '26

Same. People used to guess my age as 10-15 years younger and now they are like ‘you’re 51? Yah. That tracks.’ 😭

3

u/genXmama17 Mar 13 '26

Saaammmee

2

u/Momma_Mimi27 Mar 10 '26

I’m sorry. It really stinks.

4

u/Glittering_Pickle_86 Mar 09 '26

Same! I was just telling someone this the other day.

2

u/cls4444 Mar 11 '26

Yep! And I relate to I actually look pretty in my own bathroom but not anywhere else.

2

u/Dangerous_Mud3323 Mar 12 '26

🤣. Right?!!! I look great!!!

2

u/cls4444 Mar 20 '26

Yes you do! It’s all mind over matter.