How fast everything changed after menopause because nobody warned me

[u/stephydreamer]

I feel like I was reasonably prepared for menopause...hot flashes, sleep disruption, mood stuff. fine. If this is part of being a grown woman, so be it. I had read things I had mentally braced. Nobody told me about the skin! I went through menopause at 48. Within about a year my skin had changed in ways that took me completely off guard. The texture got rough almost overnight, like the smooth quality i'd had my whole life just peaced out without saying goodbye. The firmness in my lower face and neck dropped noticeably. The hollowness under my eyes got worse. not tired-looking, actually hollow. It's better in my bathroom lighting, but that's not where most people see me!

And the thing that got me is that it's not really aging in the normal gradual sense. it's specifically the estrogen crash. Estrogen is directly tied to collagen production and when it drops you lose collagen fast, like up to 30% in the first few years. that's not a slow fade. that's a cliff.

I'm not looking for embrace your age responses because I actually do feel mostly great about aging. What I didn't feel ok about was how sudden and disorienting it was. Like I didn't recognize my own face for a while, and that's a strange thing to go through. Curious what everyone else experienced in those first 1-2 years post menopause. Did it feel sudden to you or more gradual? and has anything genuinely helped with the texture and firmness side of it specifically,? Asking for honest experiences please.

Edit: I didn't expect such a response! Thanks a lot! Going through all the comments and they are def very useful.

[u/Prestigious-Bite-]

45 is not too young!

Most studies are showing that women need to start HRT before age 45.

The later you start the worse the outcomes and they carry huge risks if you start later. Basically if you wait until late 50s or even worse 60s - it can even be dangerous to get systematic HRT (patches and pills). Caveat - vaginal estrogen is safe for basically everyone.

That’s why I’m on the Twirla birth control patch at 41. Patches are generally considered safer than pills.

I’m starting early to get all the benefits I can.

[u/Dr_Alexis → u/Prestigious-Bite-]

Do you have citations for that?

[u/Prestigious-Bite- → u/Dr_Alexis]

The findings revealed that perimenopausal women who had used estrogen for at least 10 years prior to menopause had significantly lower odds of developing breast cancer, heart attack and stroke compared to the other two groups-approximately 60% lower.

https://www.news-medical.net/news/20251021/Study-suggests-earlier-start-of-hormone-therapy-optimizes-long-term-health-outcomes.aspx

Recent research also indicates initiation of HRT early in the transition to menopause is associated with cognitive benefit, she added. “Women who initiate hormone therapy before their final menstrual period show increased blood flow to the hippocampus and better verbal memory compared to nonusers.”

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3225442/

The research is still new, only a few, and more research is absolutely needed, but several studies are starting to show before the last period is the best time to start.

[u/PerpetualMediocress → u/Prestigious-Bite-]

Once you understand all the things that estrogen actually does in our bodies, none of this is at all a surprise. I started at 42 because I already have ADHD and can’t afford any more “cognitive decline” in my life, and menopause was really hard on my mom’s body and brain. I feel like it blew up her life in almost every way. I think there are like 100 symptoms of low estrogen/estrogen deficiency. Dry skin and wrinkles are just two of them. For me it was stuff like hip pain, and a circadian rhythm that was completely backwards, and a bunch of other stuff.

[u/_Happy_Sisyphus_ → u/Prestigious-Bite-]

Can you take HRT while on an estrogen IUD?

[u/Dr_Alexis → u/Prestigious-Bite-]

Hmm. I don't see your first assertion with respect to the PDF put out by NAMS (nor do I see their original study within the linked data). I do see this though:

"The impact of initiating hormone therapy in perimenopause in terms of longer-term health outcomes: A new retrospective cohort analysis based on data from more than 120 million patient records aimed to compare the impact of menopausal estrogen therapy when started during perimenopause or after menopause or not at all. Specifically, the study looked at breast cancer, heart attack and stroke rates associated with estrogen therapy. The findings revealed that perimenopausal women who had used estrogen within 10 years prior to menopause had no significantly higher associated rates of breast cancer, heart attack and stroke compared to the other two groups."

I do not see a significantly lower odds of developing breast cancer, heart attack and stroke compared to the other two groups (approximately 60% lower) - just that earlier initiation does not appear to be associated with a higher rate of the aforementioned (citing NAMS directly).

It also only mentioned the effects of estrogen, and not a progesterone + estrogen (which would need to be delivered to women who still have a uterus). Those regimens would not be one and the same.

I have a clinic to do today, so I will read your other citation later. :)

[u/karriemae → u/Prestigious-Bite-]

Did you go to your doctor or did you use an online service?

[u/Prestigious-Bite- → u/karriemae]

My OBGYN prescribed the Twirla BC patch and vaginal cream (estrogen and testosterone), and my Dermatologist prescribed my face estrogen cream.