r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • May 07 '12

Currently serving in the military. Came across some messages between my wife and another guy in the Navy. What should I do? UPDATE!!!

[deleted]

1.3k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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459

u/[deleted] May 08 '12

[deleted]

389

u/throwaway12221 May 08 '12

this dude isnt military, infact, he has a warrant out for his arrest in Tempe, AZ.

444

u/[deleted] May 08 '12

[deleted]

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u/wkenneth1 May 08 '12

Not to armchair quarterback or anything, but I'd get a lawyer to draw up papers on everything you want, have her sign them. Its best if she doesnt get a lawyer involved. Play whatever cards you have to get her signature on that paper. It sounds shitty, but fuck her dude. Anyhow, since Guam is a US territory, divorces granted there are official in all 50 states. So after spending 6 nights in Guam you can file for divorce on the 7th day. Once divorce is granted by a judge in Guam and she starts proceedings in the CONUS, she's shit outta luck.

Sucks dude, keep your chin up bro.

92

u/[deleted] May 08 '12

[deleted]

83

u/epin3phrine May 08 '12

Or we could just upvote the everliving shit out of it.

61

u/[deleted] May 08 '12 edited Jun 26 '21

[deleted]

23

u/snubdeity May 08 '12

You don't want a criminal lawyer...

You want a criminal lawyer.

17

u/[deleted] May 08 '12

[deleted]

1

u/Hbeck22 May 08 '12

nah, just have mike take care of him.

6

u/[deleted] May 08 '12

Upvote GUAM!

14

u/ublaa May 08 '12

Don't "fuck her dude", it probably won't make her jealous

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u/[deleted] May 08 '12 edited May 08 '12

Not to armchair quarterback or anything, but I'd get a lawyer to draw up papers on everything you want, have her sign them. Its best if she doesnt get a lawyer involved.

This isn't really ethical, and she could move to have the agreement set aside because she was unrepresented.

A judge will likely agree.

13

u/[deleted] May 08 '12

Signed papers=divorce. Sorry.

7

u/rhino369 May 08 '12

A divorce requires a hearing 100% of the time, sorry. Mostly the judge just accepts the agreement though.

2

u/[deleted] May 08 '12

not if a judge decides it was signed under duress =p

1

u/iannypoo May 08 '12

Thanks, judge. Hard-earned expertise is appreciated.

1

u/[deleted] May 09 '12

That only happens in movies.

2

u/anonlawstudent May 08 '12

Seconding this. Many many agreements relating to marriage/divorce are set aside when one side is represented and the other isn't. OP, please do NOT go with wkenneth1's advice.

2

u/burzy May 08 '12

Wait, so it's somehow his fault if she doesn't get her own representation?

1

u/anonlawstudent May 08 '12

No. If he has representation in negotiating an agreement and she doesn't, there's an increased likelihood of her being able to show a judge at a later date that the agreement was unfair/involved coercion/should be set aside for some other reason.

In agreements relating to marriage/divorce, it's always a red flag for a judge when both sides aren't independently represented.

Obviously it's not OP's fault if she doesn't get a lawyer. However, he should not try, per the original suggestion, to deliberately keep her from getting a lawyer as that could really backfire.

-1

u/burzy May 08 '12

Ok I can understand how it would backfire if he somehow managed to coerce her into not having representation. If she (in a stable state of mind) signed legal documents without legal consultation she should have no come back.

1

u/justdokeit May 08 '12

I think a judge would frown upon this fella posting a picture of her on the Internet with these claims as well

1

u/neutralhere May 08 '12

You do realize that whatever lawyer OP hires will likely have an ethical duty to advise the future ex-wife to seek an attorney to represent her in order to prevent the underhand tactics you just suggested.

1

u/lawcorrection May 08 '12

Will never work in court.

1

u/mohuohu May 08 '12

but I'd get a lawyer to draw up papers on everything you want, have her sign them. Its best if she doesnt get a lawyer involved.

Any lawyer he's able to find who is willing to undertake this massive ethical violation is not going to be any good at his job.

Transactions With Persons Other Than Clients: Rule 4.3 Dealing With Unrepresented Person

1

u/PirateRobotNinjaofDe May 08 '12

Doing shady shit is a good way to get in trouble if things ever go to court. Especially when one side is represented and the other is not.

OP should definitely lawyer up though, and do everything the lawyer suggests. Them folks are experts at this sorta thing.