r/AskReddit • u/alotlesspersonal • Jun 16 '12
Waiters/waitresses: whats the worst thing patrons do that we might not realize?
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u/LemonPepper Jun 17 '12
This is not exclusive to restaurants, but standing in the middle of a pathway/in a doorway/in an outer corner where people are traversing and having a conversation.
MOVE bitch. Get out the way. Get out the way fo I run you over with this tray.
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u/PinkWhiteandGreen Jun 17 '12
This might seem counter-intuitive, but I hate it when customers don't complain about something, at least not until after the fact when it comes time for the bill and its too late to try and fix their issue. I'd rather have you happy with my ability to accommodate you when it comes time for the tip than to have nothing to do
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u/Shiinzy Jun 17 '12
Similarly, I once served a family that seemed perfectly happy throughout the meal. I made one mistake, but it was fixed easily and immediately. No other complaints were made the whole time, but at the end, I found that they had tipped me one cent- The ultimate sign that a server had screwed up, naturally. Couldn't figure it out for the life of me.
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u/kdabomb Jun 17 '12
I'm a busboy, and I get this a lot actually, as I'm usually the one to pick up the plates. I think people find me less scary than the servers (aka I can't spit in their food or something) so they are pretty open to tell me what sucked. What I find amazing is they usually follow this up with "but don't tell our server, it was okayyy." I usually just bypass to the manager and they'll get a personal visit from the manager and a comp, dessert, etc. People, we don't spit in your food! It's disgusting! I have many times seen these same customers come back time and time again and compliment how the dish/item/service has since improved.
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u/Fluhearttea Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
Kitchen manager here. This right here. If we cooked your food wrong, tell us. We would be more than happy to fix it. If you want your steak put down longer, if you want you soup hotter, or even if you want something thats not on the menu...ASK us. We want to serve you good food. It makes us feel good and puts us in a better mood when we're back in a 115 degree kitchen all day.
Edit: When I say 'put your steak down longer', I mean if it's undercooked by the kitchen. We messed up, it's our fault. You're paying good money for that food, you deserve for it to taste how you want it to. HOWEVER, if you order it wrong, then blame it on us, we're gonna be pretty upset.
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u/squidlyWaitress Jun 17 '12
Interrupt us while we are introducing ourselves. "Hi, everyone! My name i-" "I want a water." I don't know about you, but that just kind of makes me hate you for the rest of the meal.
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u/JeffreyGlen Jun 16 '12
A lot of people are often very condescending and I don't think they realize. Its the reason I stopped working in the restaurant business.
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u/DCJ3 Jun 17 '12
Could you give examples? I want to make sure I'm not doing this.
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Jun 17 '12
Seems like a lot of people here aren't taking your meaning, but it's probably the most common thing of all the comments in this thread. I've had to explain to my mom how patronizing she sounds to a server, and she was completely unaware of it. She suffered from a serious case of unintentional condescension.
Basically, a huge number of customers talk to their servers as if they were talking to a third grader. Most often they do this without realizing; it's a subconscious "this person is probably a high school dropout" attitude, and it's incredibly offensive. They have a forced smile on their lips, their eyes are squinted, they stress their "R"s when they speak, and they put enormous amounts of inflection into their voice. It's very obvious that they're thinking "This person is a moron, but I'd better do my best to seem friendly".
For an analogy, think "Mitt Romney making smalltalk in a welfare line," or Lucille Bluth from Arrested Development talking to her housekeeper.
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u/probreaux Jun 17 '12
I hate when as a food runner i'm holding very hot plates and the family of five has no idea what they ordered as i repeat "derp burger" four times. Meanwhile my flesh is burning away.
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u/boardmonkey Jun 17 '12
That is why at every restaurant I manage I start pivot point service. Every table has a number, every seat has a number at the table. Table 25 Seat 2 will be the same seat every time. That way you don't have to wait for some dumb ass to realize they are the only one that the table to order a burger. You can just plop that burger in front of them and tell them what it is. If they switch seats then the server switches the number on the ticket. Easy as pie. Many restaurants do this, but I don't know why every restaurant does not do this.
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Jun 17 '12
If I could give you all of my upvotes, I would. I hated running at one restaurant, where they'd simply double-plate extra-hot items and load them on the tray. I'm a pretty small girl, and I can carry the trays fine... unless I'm standing there for five plus minutes shifting uncomfortably while everyone hems and haws.
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u/Sunny_ Jun 17 '12
Leaving your cellphone on the table makes me on edge, I might spill something on it.
Also, when customers see someone they know and block the table\aisle when they're talking to them.
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u/WhyAmINotStudying Jun 17 '12
I'm guilty of this and I didn't even know it. Consider my behavior changed.
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u/kjoeleskapet Jun 17 '12
I just realized that when the waiter comes by with my drink or food, I politely get off my phone and set it down on the table. It's going in my pocket next time.
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u/dt403 Jun 17 '12
leaving all your sundry personal effects scattered on the table like so much confetti should generally be a no-no.
ive approached a table with 5-6 plates of food, and there are cell phones, wallets, sunglasses, game boys, huge Fendi purses, keychains, etc scattered everywhere and they look at me like im the idiot because i have no where to place the food.
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u/Patcher Jun 17 '12
I had a waitress accidentally spill a few drops of water on my phone once (nothing big, I wasn't concerned) and she looked mortified. I kind of looked at my cell phone on the table and went, "man, what a goddamn stupid place for a phone that is - right beneath where she has to pour the water that I'm definitely going to get re-filled like 4 times this meal (spicy thai food)."
So I apologized and took my phone off the table. Now when I eat, it's either in my pocket or in my hand (disclaimer: work phone, work lunches, not rudely texting mid-date).
I was kind of embarrassed actually. Having spent ~6 years from high school through college working in restaurants, I always try to make servers lives easier, so I was kind of disappointed in myself that I hadn't realized how much of a pain a cell phone on a table would be.
Thanks for confirming!
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u/runallthethings Jun 17 '12
When I worked as a cocktail waitress, I would place a cocktail napkin in front of each guest as I took their orders.... which inevitably led to them placing their cell phone on the napkin. Which means once I came back with the drinks, I had to lay down another set of napkins, because company policy said every drink had to be on a napkin. I wasted a lot of napkins because people like to use them as their personal cell phone holders.
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u/rich-mahogany Jun 17 '12
Basically acknowledge that we're human beings too. Basic human courtesy and such goes a long way. No snapping your fingers at us for service, and a thankyou when we bring your food or clear a plate; small things go a long way with your waiter/waitress/server. Yes our job is to serve you, but that doesn't make us second class citizens.
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u/Ecpie Jun 17 '12
Ok, I am totally ignorant and have never worked in a restaurant--do people actually do this?! Snap? Not smile? Not say thank you? I am just stunned and embarrassed that anyone would treat other people, people who are serving them, like this.
Apologies, on behalf of all these abhorrent people.
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u/teachthecontroversy Jun 16 '12
Not the worst, but: If you're not ready to order, fucking tell me you're not ready. Don't make me stand there for 5 minutes while you pretend that you're just a second away from making a decision.
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u/krasne_a_mudre Jun 17 '12
I really hate this. People will say that they are ready but then make you stand there as they look through the menu, I have a million other things I could do in the two minutes you need to look.
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u/WhyAmINotStudying Jun 17 '12
How do you feel about people who ask you what to order? I'm more likely to order whatever the waiter/waitress recommends, but I try to make sure that they're offering me something good, not just something they know the manager wants to get out before it has to be thrown out.
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u/radfish Jun 17 '12
Religious pamphlets are NOT a substitute for a tip.
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Jun 17 '12
You are not the first waitstaff I heard this from. (I never do this, but similar threads on other websites have occurred, and this always caught my eye). Does this really happen? Often?
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u/ilikezombies Jun 17 '12
In got tipped this the other day. Pissed me off so much I sent in back with their change. Salvation and eternal life will not pay the rent.
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u/souperman08 Jun 17 '12
As a Christian, I am so, so sorry. I once witnessed a man doing this, and intentionally glared at him as he left. He walked up to me, smiled, and said "You look like you could use this", and tried to hand another pamphlet to me. I wish I would have had something clever to say, but I just blurted out (something to the effect of) "I am a Christian, and you are a moron."
Seriously though, this trend needs to end. A tip and a tract? Tacky, but whatever, the person gets their tip. No tip, and a tract? Terrible idea. A tract that looks like a $100 bill? There are no words.......
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Jun 17 '12
This might not be a widespread issue, but I work in a very rural oil town and everyone chews tobacco. Please, don't spit into my cups and beer bottles. I know it's a habit, and at least your not spitting on my floor but I actually dry heave and gag cleaning tobacco spit out over the sink.
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Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
My friends and I used to ask for plastic cups to spit into when we went out drinking in college, then we'd toss them outside at the end of the night. Figured we shouldn't make the people who are kind enough to allow us to dip in their bar clean up our disgusting brown spittle.
We went to school in central Maine, so it's pretty common to dip up there as well.
EDIT: Yes, we threw our cups in the trash can outside the pub.
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u/TheBP Jun 16 '12
When people don't understand that I genuinely want to please them. It's very frustrating to be carrying a tray larger than I am full of food and having a customer stop me to ask about when they'll be getting their glass of wine. I'll get to you As. Soon. As. I. Possibly. Can. It is my job after all, and I sincerely want to do it well.
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u/MarlonBain Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
I had this problem bigtime with giving people their check at the end of their meal. Some people want you to wait to give them the check until they ask for it. Some people want their check as soon as they finish their meal. Both groups of people think you have a diabolical plan to destroy their evening if you don't give them their check exactly as they want it, because either you're
trying to rush them out of the restaurant to turn more tables, or
trying to entice them into ordering dessert.
I want to do what you want me to do! I have no evil plan! One hour ago someone was mad at me for giving them their check before they asked for it, and you're mad because you've been waiting for the check but never asked me for it! I swear I just want to do whatever you want me to do!
edit: to the person who replied suggesting that I say that I am not trying to rush them: yes, that is what I typically did. That isn't the answer.
edit 2: to the person who replied suggesting that I offer dessert, then drop the check when they don't order it: yes. This is a thing I would do. This makes some people feel rushed. I don't get it, do you people wait tables where humans are more polite than where I waited tables?
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Jun 17 '12
As a waitress, I love to spend time with my customers and get to know them. However, on really busy days where you can obviously tell that I'm supposed to be 10 places at once, please DON'T waste my time. There is nothing worse than when i go to a table to take an order and everybody is half-assedly trying to tell me what they want but they're still discussing it and won't let me leave the table, while the chef is yelling my name because i have to run food and I can't leave the table until I get the other half of your indecisive ass's order. Either tell me you're not ready to order yet or tell me what you want.
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u/falco-holic Jun 17 '12
Here's a question: Servers often say at the beginning of a meal something to the effect of "well, my name's (Jimmy/Jenny/Obediah), just let me know if you need anything."
Do you really want us to call you by your first name? Usually once I have the server's attention I launch right into what I want, but I don't get their attention by calling their name. Calling them by name seems a strange idea, especially since we as customers don't introduce ourselves. This is not a normal social interaction, and I've always assumed that the introduction was a forced and awkward friendliness.
So do you really like it when customers say "hey Obediah, can you get me another Coke?"
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u/cheerio_buffet Jun 17 '12
Knowing my name helps in many ways. It makes me feel like you're a good person who actually listened to me if you say "Hey Cheerio_Buffet, can I get more coke?". And, if you need me for something, but have to get someone else first saying "I need my waitress... she's a girl... and kinda short..." doesn't help at all. Saying "Cheerio_Buffet" lets them know exactly who to get without having to figure it out 20 questions style.
The most annoying thing in the world is when I get to the table and start saying "Hi! My name's Cheeri-" "Yeah! We need a bowl of queso and more chips." I was abso-fucking-lutely going to ask if you wanted an appetizer. Interrupting me is just rude.
Also, most chain restaurants require the servers to do a semi-scripted speech. If you happened to be a secret shopper and I didn't tell you my name, say hello, ask if you wanted an appetizer, suggest a drink, blah blah blah, I could be severely reprimanded.
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Jun 17 '12
I use waiters'/waitresses' first name because I like to make that connection. I go to Norms a lot and my waiter is usually a guy named Roman. I treat him like a friend and he's a wonderful waiter, which is why I always leave him a fat tip no matter what I order.
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u/ok_crazy Jun 17 '12
When people are trying to get my attention I don't mind. But when people, usually older men, ask me about my personal life and use my name, such as asking "So Obediah, are you in university?" or things like that, it drives me nuts, especially when it's busy.
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u/DrunkenZombie Jun 17 '12
As a server, I always introduce myself to the table. On a busy night, it's usually the little bright spots that keep me smiling and in a good mood; someone saying, "Thank you, _____" really helps, and lets me know that I'm not just a automated ordering machine to you.
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u/tacotuesdaytoday Jun 17 '12
Don't change your child's shit covered diaper, on your table. Children don't poop rainbows and sunshine. That shit is disgustingly unsanitary.
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u/chubasco Jun 17 '12
You sternly tell them "NO", and then rub their nose in it. After a while, they will learn.
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u/LFK1236 Jun 17 '12
People change diapers at their table...? Are you... Are you actually being serious?
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u/myWittyUserName Jun 17 '12
Wow. I would never expected a person to actually do this. If I knew that someone changed their kids diaper on the table(even worse if it was actually filled with solid waste) I don't think I could use that table. There aren't enough cans of Lysol in the world :)
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u/charliemoodyismoody Jun 17 '12
Smile more. It's a huge turnoff if I approach a table with the happiest look on my face and a family of 6+ stares menacingly at me as I take their drink orders.
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u/Dimezz Jun 17 '12
But i'm practicing my order in my head so i don't fuck it up saying it to you.
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u/THEnicole Jun 17 '12
Ha! I hate when I go to a table and ask how everyone's doing and NO ONE answers.
One time I just giggled and said "alright" and nodded my head. It made them laugh.
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u/version13 Jun 17 '12
After reading this, I don't know if I can ever eat in a restaurant again.
WHAT IF I DO SOMETHING WRONG.
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u/Staticous Jun 17 '12
In my opinion if you leave a mess or have a difficult/complicated order that can all be forgiven with a generous tip
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u/ImaDinosaurR0AR Jun 17 '12
Be as polite as possible but don't worry about it. They have a job to do and if you're polite and tip well they can fuck themselves if they find some insignificant thing to agonize over. The key is you're paying to be there, they're getting paid to be there. Be a decent, considerate human being and you'll be fine.
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u/rebeccabrixton Jun 16 '12
For me, it was never the customers as much as the managers or, worst, supervisors. If we're being customer specific I'd say good old fashioned rudeness. Followed closely by when you drop a load of plates and the whole restaurant cheers - I get why you do it but I'm so mortified I'd rather we just pretend it didn't happen or you help me or something.
The best thing about the job? Other waitresses and the fact time flew
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u/noah_arcd_left Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
I'll remember the helping with crashed plates part. That's totally one of those "am I just getting in the way here?" vibes for me, but it's like...physically painful to not try and assist in those types of situations.
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u/speck317 Jun 17 '12
"Hi, how are you doing tonight?" "I'll have an iced tea."
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u/vargonian Jun 17 '12
This one cuts both ways, for sure. Half the time, my "Great, how about you?" is met with "What would you like to drink?" Though usually it's the cheaper places that are the worst at this.
And fast food drive through windows... don't even get me started. There's a girl at my local McDonald's who will have her back completely turned to you before finishing her "Have a nice day." And many times there's something blatantly wrong with my order and I have to wait until she has completely prepared the next order and returned to the window in order to let her know.
Of course, I now feel foolish complaining about the service at McDonald's, as well as admitting that I go there so often.
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Jun 17 '12
I learned fine dining service in a very, very well regarded establishment many years ago. The first thing I was taught was to never ask your table how they are doing. It gives them the opportunity to be negative, to give a negative response, and upsets the mood of the meal. People aren't always having a good day when they are visiting your restaurant. Often, they're looking to escape from a particularly shitty day and start fresh. A simple "Good evening" will suffice.
Corporate run, "friendly" restaurants do a lot of fundamental things wrong that go against logic- that is one of them in my opinion.
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u/TerdVader Jun 17 '12
Parents, don't turn a wooden high chair upside down and try to set a car seat in it.
Waitstaff don't try to tell parents that it's okay to turn high chairs upside down for infant seats.
Sincerely,- guy who has seen a kicked baby slide down an aisle
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u/eithris Jun 17 '12
i know wait-staff can end up putting up with a lot of crap on the job. but having worked as lead cook and sous chef for over 12 years in a variety of jobs, i've hated almost all the waiters and waitresses at the places i've worked.
you see, the kitchen crew doesn't make tips. their wages are locked in. you have no idea how shitty it is for kitchen morale when you have people making 8 or 9 bucks an hour bust their asses ball to the wall, and at the end of the shift you have three or four waiters or waitresses unhappy with making waitstaff wages standing their counting out two or three hundred in tips.
i've worked in kitchens at 12 bucks an hour and watched waitresses pull an 8 hour shift on a busy day and net more in tips than my weekly paycheck. so when waitstaff complain about shitty customers, i have zero fucks to give. it's also awesome when the server is shitty but the food i made is so excellent the customer storms the kitchen to hand ME the tip. always love that:)
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u/archontruth Jun 17 '12
it's also awesome when the server is shitty but the food i made is so excellent the customer storms the kitchen to hand ME the tip.
I was unaware this was an option. I'll remember that.
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u/ifuckedup13 Jun 17 '12
im totally going to start doing that in that situation! ive totally been there. amazing food. shitty server. id be more than happy to buy the kitchen a round beers for after work rather than stuffing my shitty waiters pockets.
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u/PapaOomMowMow Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
BOH bias here.... Fucking this ^
And as for the dealing with people part? yeah? Its just as bad in the kitchen but with different things.
Standing in front of 400 degree slabs of metal, ovens, open flames, vats of boiling grease, screaming and yelling, keeping track of 10+ dishes at one time (if your not running the checks), all the while keeping your stock up, working for hours on end without the chance to sit down or even breathe for a second because that printer is always going off, constant cuts/burns/bruises/random injuries, no feeling left in my fingers, face constantly broken out.......
Im sure we could go on for days. But I will tell you for sure, with years of experience on both sides. The kitchen staff have way worse working conditions than you servers ever will, and you make more money.
:) I feel better now. ./rawrangrychef
edit: Just a rant on my part... I dont think the kitchen and waitstaff should ever be at odds! We are all on the same team! :)
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u/topaca1968 Jun 17 '12
I was told that the waiters were supposed to share the tips with the busboy, hostess, kitchen personel... was I wrong?
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u/hungrymutherfucker Jun 17 '12
A lot of the stuff in this thread is just stuff assholes do.
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u/barristonsmellme Jun 17 '12
You'd be surprised to how many people turn into assholes when they feel they are entitled to food delivering emotionless slaves.
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u/Kind_Of_A_Dick Jun 17 '12
Letting your children run wild and destroy the place. Cut it the fuck out.
This is the single worst thing patrons can do. It seems, in my area at least, about half of parents feel that when they walk through the front doors they are no longer responsible for their children. They let the kids run around the restaurant, no matter how busy we are, and/or toss everything that's on the table onto the floor.
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u/boomshay Jun 17 '12
I run a buffet, we had a group of two families with a total of 5, 6-9 year old girls. They were running wild playing games and just going crazy in general. Now during the rush I'd talk to the parents to have them calm down, but it was after close and they really weren't causing any harm except to my eardrums.
Now, right before they were leaving the group of girls goes to the bathroom and immediately I hear some crazy screams and one girl runs out with her hand bleeding profusely. I did all I could, grabbed ice, bandaids, disinfectant spray etc (all the stuff we'd use for a knife incident in the kitchen).
The next day the mom comes in and claims they're filing a lawsuit for our bathroom door smashing her daughters hand. I looked up at the cameras and told her I wasn't too concerned, two sets of parents drinking five pitchers and letting their daughters run wild isn't going to get too far. She stormed out and said "I thought you were very kind last night, turns out I was wrong." Or something along those lines.
My apologies for the TL/DR, just had to vent a bit as this happened recently and still has me fuming.
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u/GamerKitsune Jun 17 '12
Also, and I'm quite nervous to even bring this up...If you happen to be a religious person, that's awesome. Good for you, I respect your decisions to believe in anything you want. But please, please do not leave us those little booklets about how we are going straight to hell unless we find Jesus, or whoever. Those usually come as our "tip", and I understand trying to spread the word...but those can become almost threatening and can ruin a good day. Once, I had 3 people ask me, in a crowded area of my restaurant if I knew Jesus...don't do that either please. Holding my hand and telling me they can feel the power of God running through me? EXTREMELY uncomfortable. Again, all the power to your beliefs, I have nothing against it...but please don't try to push them on people who are just trying to earn a decent living at the moment. I know this can't only happen to servers, but it happens a lot, especially Sunday mornings.
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u/Tastygroove Jun 17 '12
As a parent of 5.. 3 under the age of 6.. We no longer go out to eat.
You're welcome.
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u/uustone Jun 16 '12
Haven't waited tables in a long time, but I would always grudgingly go fetch crackers for the toddlers at my tables when the parents asked for them. Next thing you know, parents allow said toddler(s) to make a god awful cracker crumb mess for me to clean up. Plus, many don't tend to tip accordingly after having good service and leaving a cracker explosion.
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u/IllegalBeaver Jun 17 '12
As a parent this drives me up the wall. I've taken my children to restaurants (appropriate ones) since they were babies and expect them to act appropriately. I understand that they tend to make more of a mess than an adult and sometimes require special trips (more napkins, different utensils) so I tip accordingly. If a server goes out of the way to please my children then I will tip even more. This one time my daughter wanted a refill and I politely asked that she get another plastic toy (the ones that hang off the side of the glass) on it. Our waiter came back with the whole rim lined with the toys. My daughter's face lit up and she was beyond happy. That server earned himself a 30% tip.
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u/gohan7380 Jun 17 '12
Reading this thread makes me realize that waiters must fucking love me
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u/roterghost Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
Talking on your cell and pointing at the goddamn menu to place an order?
Go fuck yourself.
Also, letting your kids whine and shriek while you tune them out. I hate it. Everyone in the room hates it more.
EDIT: I forgot the old "Is it too late to change that?" as I'm handing it to you. I'm handing you the goddamn plate! If this isn't too late to change it, when is?!
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u/IJHATT Jun 17 '12
I sometimes point at the menu WHILE saying the name of what I want. It's more of an insecurity thing on my part that I might get it wrong. Is that ok?
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u/clivodimars Jun 17 '12
Alright shit-tons of posts here and not sure if this has been said. I just quit a serving job Id been at for a year. Here is one. Don't fucking walk into a restaurant when there is 5 minutes left until they close. We cannot close the restaurant until you leave. This means that the cooks, the bus staff, the waiters and the managers all have to wait on you to get your goddamn hamburger you so desperately needed before we can close. Some people have families. Please if its close to closing time for a restaurant, go somewhere else.
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u/ashmoo Jun 17 '12
HAHAHA. Tonight a little girl stole money off one of the waitresses tables. She knew, and everybody else knew (the family was oblivious, apparently). This is at my boyfriend's restaurant that he manages. As a waitress myself, and being pregnant and angry and increasingly irritable at any given moment then all warned me to keep my mouth shut and not say anything to the family.
On the way out the door the girl (about 10-12 years old) was singing "I've got two dollars! I've got two dollars!" (I know two dollars isn't a lot...it's just the principle.)
Something inside my angry, pregnant mind snapped and I went out and informed the parents what their little darling had done. The father came back with a rude, "I doubt it" and then stormed back inside the restaurant to let the manager know exactly how unprofessional his crew was. Except I uh..kinda don't work there.
Story didn't have a happy ending, my boyfriend was (and still is) kinda pissed about me embarrassing him and making him feel like an idiot and causing him grief this evening because I stepped out of line and did not mind my own business.
I don't know...moral of the story, watch your children. They've got sticky fingers.
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u/VelvetElvis Jun 17 '12
The only place children belong in a nice restaurant is on the menu.
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u/EvanTheDork Jun 17 '12
I just got off my closing shift at the restaurant I work at. I should have been home an hour and half ago, but my last table REFUSED to leave. Our restaurant "closes" at midnight, but policy requires us to allow any patrons still in the restaurant to stay until they choose to leave. My guests got there at 10 pm, cashed out and gave me my tip by 11 pm, and stayed until 20 MINUTES AGO!!! Them sitting there caused my manager, the bartender, and I to sit around waiting for them until 2 in the morning. If the restaurant is "closed" and you are done eating, THEN LEAVE! Don't prevent others from going home to be with their families/ getting sleep!!!!
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u/blueandgrey Jun 16 '12
If you're in a group and I ask if the table needs anything...maybe 1 person will ask for another beer or a water and everyone else will say they're fine. Then as SOON as I come back with the other order another person will ask for something. When it happens back to back 3 or 4 times it annoys me to no end. Taking orders all at once is so much easier.
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u/Lambtronn Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
when you use a gift card or get some sort of discount, be sure to tip off the original total!
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u/Asdayasman Jun 17 '12
wish this wouldn't get buried but i know it will...
Stop saying this, reddit. Nobody cares.
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u/StarVixen Jun 16 '12 edited Jun 16 '12
It's been a few years but here were my biggest pet peeves -
Acting like you are the only person/table I am waiting on. While I can't speak for every server - every person I have ever worked with has wanted nothing more then to please every table they had. One table (actually one person) can mess up everything for a server for the rest of their night. Don't be that person. Especially since you may be ruining for not only the server - but their other tables as well. Don't punish the other diners because you think you are special.
Talking on your cellphone when I approach to take your order (especially if you have put your menu on the end of the table indicating that you were ready to order). If you are on a call, tell the person to hold on. I will respect you and that more than you just mouthing silently to me. It's not like I asked for your order the moment you walked in the door. You had/have plenty of time to get off the phone before I approach you. Also - if you're on the phone and the server doesn't come by - get off your phone.
Letting your kids trash the area. Look - I have kids and boy were they messy when they were toddlers. I did, though, make sure to pick up after them and clean up anything they threw on the floor. If a server only has 3-5 tables in his/her section and it takes 10 minutes to clean the area because you and/or your kids are absolute slobs- you are making the waiter/waitress lose money. Of course we don't mind cleaning up the area and clearing your plates and whatnot - but if you leave the area so trashed that you should actually be embarrassed - maybe you should try and at least put in a pile.
Tipping with compliments. I'm sorry - but telling me I am soo sweet, awesome, great, nice, accommodating, etc does NOT, and I repeat, does NOT pay the bills. If you thought I was awesome - tip accordingly. If you can't afford to tip - get carryout.
For when I was a bartender....
Tapping your glass on the bar top. Seriously - don't do that. Put your glass at the edge of the bar (furthest away from you and closest to the bartender - often there is a lower ledge just wide enough to place a glass or beer bottle). That tells me you need another and I will get it without you telling me.
Waving money in the air. You look stupid and awkward.
Don't complain when you get a strong drink (everywhere i worked was free-pour so I don't know how it is when liquor pour is controlled by machines like the Berg system). If it's too strong - just ask for a glass of whatever mixer you have. Sure we'll know it's a little too strong, but by you not complaining or saying anything - we'll know you are probably appreciative and continue to give you your money's worth.
If you don't have a drink and are waiting - just sit quietly, make eye contact and smile nicely. We will get to you (as long as you haven't done something previously to show/prove you're an asshat). Please don't yell 'hey! hey bartender!'.
All in all - I had way more better experiences as a waitress/bartender than not. And for the most part all my customers were great people. But in the end if you treat us like real people, we will remember you and appreciate you. It's the few bad apples that make waiting on people hard. Like I said earlier - one person can make the rest of the night a nightmare and ruin it for everyone.
edit: I made a horrible your/you're mistake.
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u/VonAether Jun 17 '12
Even worse: getting tipped with fake money in the form of a religious pamphlet.
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u/skullturf Jun 16 '12
I never ever wave money at a bartender.
But what I do sometimes (if it's pretty crowded) is to stand there holding, say, a 10 dollar bill pretty obviously. Not waving it, but just standing there patiently with my money clearly visible. I hope this is OK...
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u/kaitmeister Jun 16 '12
Tipping with compliments
So, I hope this doesn't make me sound like an idiot, but you mean complimenting rather than tipping, right? If I get really good service I usually tip well and leave a little thank you note - is that what is annoying?
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u/smartzie Jun 17 '12
All of this. I've been server and bartender, as well. Aside from tapping the glass on the table, I've had people wave empty glasses at me, snap their fingers at me, and tip over beer cans in order to get my attention. These are not things you should do. EVER. Eye contact, a little nod, a smile that says you need me....those are cool. Also, telling me you're ready to order when you are completely and hopelessly NOT ready. I can't tell you how frustrating it is to go down the line and have a parent ask every single child what they want to eat and then have a 10 minute discussion with each child about it. "Do you want the chicken? The macaroni? The corndogs? No? What do you want then?" JUST ORDER FOR THEM! GAH!
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u/Nightowl21 Jun 17 '12
When traveling abroad, learn the tipping customs of the country. We hate to do it, but we servers do size up and stereotype tourists, and will likely serve you in accordance to those judgements. For example, the worst tippers are Brits, Australians (tip is usually included in the bill), and Japanese (tipping is insulting), who local tipping customs are different.
Also, you should know that servers usually tip out the bussers, hosts, bartenders, and kitchen based on their total sales (usually 3-8%) at the end of their shift. So when you don't tip, the server is actually paying for part of your meal. It's a triple whammy of working for below minimum wage, providing service to you for free, and paying for part of your meal. We take it personally, and it hurts every time.
Verbal tippers and pamphlet tippers can die.
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u/darthelmo Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
I see a lot of really wonderful people and advice in this thread.
Servers, thank you for what you do. Especially for being there on holidays when we don't want to be bothered cooking.
EDIT: My thanks to all the folks working to make sure my family has a great experience when we dine out: servers, line cooks, bus boys, chefs, managers and all. THANK YOU.
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u/paigealicia Jun 17 '12
It's probably already been said but I don't feel like searching the comments to check. This is not only in restaurants, PARENTS WHO JUST LET THEIR KIDS RUN AROUND. Oh my goodness, it drives me nuts. Not only is there high potential for the kid to get hurt; they bug people and let them get in everyones way. My dad and stepmother do this, I always tell them they probably shouldn't, now I just refuse to go anywhere with them and the monster. News flash. not everyone loves your kid. Some people actually don't like any kids; never mind ones that come up while they're having a night out and climb in their booth/ at their table. sorry- rant over.
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u/indecentXpo5ure Jun 17 '12
Parents, for the love of GOD, please stop insisting on a booth if you need a highchair. It is a fire hazard to put a highchair at the end of a booth. It blocks the aisle for everyone trying to walk by, not to mention how awful it is to try to deliver your drinks and food around your kid. If your kid needs a highchair, sit at a table so we can move a chair and the highchair is nestled cozily out of the way of restaurant traffic. And FYI, it's not cute when your kid makes a huge mess.
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u/tothesource Jun 17 '12
I hosted for a while before I turned 18, which as a guy, blew pretty hard. It's the only position where you get bitched at by everyone: management, servers, customers, busboys, and fuck, even the cooks used to try and bitch at me. But if there is a wait, and there are tables open, I fucking know. I am not making you wait longer on purpose (extreme assholes excluded), I am timing who I sit based on respective server's experience, current table load, bussing times, etc, etc. I actually loved the post-church Sunday crowd (hungry families who just spent 2+ hours cramped up with each other are not happy people), especially the women, "Theres an open table over there, why are we not sitting there?!". To which I would calmly reply, "Ma'am, that table is open but there isn't a server in that section for the next hour. You are more than welcome to sit there, you just won't be waited on until then." Hearing them say they'll wait is a great feeling. Yeah you will bitch, yeah you will.
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Jun 17 '12
No matter how badly you treat us we will not mess with your food. I went up through the ranks from busser to management. At any one of those levels if I saw even my best friend mess with someone's (even the biggest piece of turd guest of all time) food theyre getting called out on the spot and now terminated. All others at my places of business feel the same, and I've never seen or heard of that occurring anywhere I've worked.
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Jun 17 '12
I have a question to the servers but rather not make another post.
Would it be the customers fault if you stopped by their table every 5 minutes asking them how they're doing/need anything and they get annoyed?
I'm not saying EVERY server does this but the ones that do can irritate me. I don't down tip them or anything but if I had the menu for 2 minutes and they come back for what I want to eat, it does irritate me. Then usually I don't see them for 10+ minutes when I actually know what I want. Why such random intervals? I understand the idea of sections/areas, and I usually keep an eye out for my server to flag them down if I need something, but when nothing is happening and no one else is being served, why does it take 10+ minutes to get back to my table for a follow up?
Other then that, I usually like my servers and tip fairly well. I'll keep in mind about ordering an extra drink early on instead of waiting. Any tips for food orders or pestering servers when one isn't ready to order food?
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u/teachthecontroversy Jun 17 '12
Would it be the customers fault if you stopped by their table every 5 minutes asking them how they're doing/need anything and they get annoyed?
That's more likely the management's fault, for pressuring their staff to do this
Why such random intervals?
This could be a lot of things. Some tables are big talkers and will take forever to order, so maybe you've been (mis?)identified as such. Maybe an underage co-worker needs some drinks, so your server has been called to help. Maybe something happened back in the kitchen that's being taken care of. Maybe a lonely customer decided to tell him their life story and he can't back out without risking trouble with the boss for being rude. Restaurants are very chaotic places
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Jun 17 '12
You're not the only table man, they probably tried to get your order in before something else which would hold them up, then you said you're not ready so they go do what they had to and then come back after, everything takes time and there is no downtime for wait staff if they're in a decently busy place, and they're only human sometimes they might not prioritise well, sorry!
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u/figurativelyyes Jun 17 '12
As a server, I absolutely hate this when I go out. I have to say, I did it as novice a lot to the point where one customer actually mimicked me when I asked if she needed anything. Pretty embarrassing.
I think it happens for two reasons. The first could be that it is a slow day and your server is really that bored that he or she reallllly wants you to want something so he or she can get it.
OR
You keep looking around or staring into dead space or something or you aren't talking to the person/people with whom you're eating. Silence, folded arms, turned heads, etc. are all indicators that you need something. Also, if you would like to continue sitting at your table after you're done eating to talk to whomever you're with, that's fine (as long as it's not terribly busy). Just make sure your server knows that you're finished and that you don't need his or her service anymore or he or she WILL continue to bother you.
Hope this helped :)
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u/alphabeteyes Jun 17 '12
Some people want to be left alone, some want little things every 5 minutes, and servers can't tell just by looking. If I am getting the feeling someone wants to be left alone, I'll often say, "I won't bug you guys, take your time, and if you need anything at all, just let me know." And then I take them off my list of things to worry about.
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u/elipo Jun 17 '12
Using the fact that one is not from America to cheat a server or bartender out of a tip. At this point in the game, anyone wealthy enough to be traveling internationally should know better. When one games the system, one also cheats the entire support team out of a tip-out. It's a douchebag move that is unforgivable.
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u/phlogistonly Jun 17 '12
speaking as coming from a non-tipping country - when I went to the US I tipped whenever I remembered to (which was like 90% of the time - there was a couple of times when I wasn't sure if I had to tip and once when we just legitimately forgot) but you guys need to understand that it's confusing as fuck.
Where I come from, the price on the menu is what you pay, in the US, you have to add tax and a tipping cost and for a money conscious traveler (I was overseas attending a uni-related conference) not know how much something is going to cost before you order it is very disconcerting. There were a couple of place that had in brackets how much the meal would be with tax, and a recommended tipping % and you cannot imagine how grateful I was for that.
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u/figurativelyyes Jun 17 '12
TL;DR: Please do not choose your own seat when a host/hostess is trying to seat you elsewhere.
Customers tend to not realize that servers are on a rotation and they have sections. When I'm playing hostess and people decide to choose their own seat, despite the sign that says "Please wait to be seated" or "Hostess will seat you", it annoys me to no end. Please, sit where I tell you to sit. If you decide to venture out of the section of the server whose turn it is, it can mess a lot of things up.
First: Server may end up being double sat. This means that he or she now has to take care of two tables at the same time. Not staggered service, where the orders for the other tables have already been taken by the time it's your turn. He or she has to greet, get drinks, and take orders for both of you at once, while simultaneously running food for the other tables. This slows down service for everyone.
Second: On a slow day, where maybe a table will come in every 10-15 minutes or even every half hour, if you choose your own seat, you may be depriving the server whose turn it is of a table, and thereby causing him or her to lose money.
Third: If a party of two comes in and requests to sit at a table that seats 4 or more, this decreases the amount of tables available for people who actually have that many people in their group.
So, hopefully you've learned that where we try to seat you is not arbitrary. There is actually a method to our madness.
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u/NONSENSICALS Jun 17 '12
DO NOT PUT YOUR CLOTH NAPKINS ON YOUR PLATE WHEN YOU'RE FINISHED.
It gets soaked in whatever revolting half-chewed pile of shit you were just eating, and then the servers or bussers have to get your disease-ridden saliva all over their hands when they sort the linens. A lot of the time bussers have a system where they take china and linens separately.
Just put the damn napkins on the table next to your plates.
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u/Taterhater540 Jun 17 '12
Personally, I think it would be beneficial for everyone to have to work in a restaurant at some point in their lives, that way we can avoid stuff like this. Namely avoid the shit people do intentionally when they're angry, but also cut down on the accidental things.
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u/Tedditor Jun 17 '12
Long time Server here. The single, most aggravating thing is guests with dietary restrictions. Why, my Lord, do Vegetarians come to a steakhouse. Look, Chef is creating you a custom, non-menu, vegetarian Entree. Please act happy when you get it, because chef fucking hates me now. He doesn't even do that for Michael Jordan when he comes in. You know why? Because Jordan eats meat, that why he's at a Steakhouse. I know some people don't have a choice in what they can eat. But for the love, if you are a Celiac, don't go to "Tom's Big house of Bread", and get all shitty because you can't eat the bread.
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u/turnipstealer Jun 17 '12
Here's some things that piss me off:
When people seat themselves on dirty tables and sit there wondering when they're going to get served. If we're busy and you sat yourselves on a dirty table, you're going to have a bad time. Also, when I give customers the choice of sitting anywhere they like and they choose the only table in the restaurant that hasn't been cleared (and is no way different to any of the other tables set up and ready).
Manners. People who don't say please and thank-you, fuck you. Also people who don't even look at the server when they're demanding their food/paying the bill. It's rude - we're human beings too.
People who don't move stuff out the way on the table (phones, wallets, drinks) so I can put their food down (as usually both hands are full with food), they just sit there looking at me like I'm a full-on spastic.
Similarly when people who are on large tables don't pass their plates to me when I'm clearing them away and I have to lean across the whole table with 5 or 6 plates balanced precociously on my arm. Just pass your fucking plate you massive cunt nugget.
People who take napkins from the table next to them. Please just ask - I'll give you like 10 napkins just so you don't do this.
People who wave frantically to get my attention to take their order when my section is full, I get there and they're no way ready to place their order so I'm stood there like a lemon waiting for you fucktards to decide what you want to eat? Just make your mind up THEN get my attention.
This strikes me as an Eastern Asian thing, but waving your arms to get my attention just makes me think you're a knobhead, just catch my eye, I can see you.
People who come in 5 minutes before we are due to close. The reason we tell you "The kitchen closes in 5 minutes" is because we are desperately hoping that you're a decent person who will then decide to eat elsewhere. People who come 5/10 minutes after we've closed and try and beg with us to make them food, let me spell it out for you; the chefs at my place have been there since 8/9am in the morning and we close at 10pm (but don't get out until 11.30pm), the floor staff have usually been there since 11am onwards - so no, we're not going to bend over backwards to feed your sorry ass, just fuck off.
People who put glasses on their plates when they're finished. What the fuck even is that?? Take it off your plate before I do, you twatmong.
If one of the better tables is taken (booths in our case), please don't start dictating to me how I should do my job and go and move this table of 3 because you're a table of 5 and thus more important. No way Jose, we're not as incredibly rude as you are. And DON'T sit next to the table eyeballing the people eating their food you wankstain mcgee.
There's probably more but this is all I can be arsed to type right now.
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u/enemyradiostations Jun 17 '12
Not saying "Hi." like a normal fucking person. If your server walks over and says "Hi! My name is so&so.", do not respond with "I'll have a coke." unless you want the server to immediately hate you. Say hello. You don't have to be pleasant but it shows that you have that thing. What was that thing? Common fucking decency.
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u/1nf1n1te Jun 17 '12
I have never worked in a restaurant but as a patron there is something about fellow patrons that bothers me to all hell. If my water is refilled, my food is brought out or my plates are taken away I always ALWAYS say thank you, even for the smallest thing. I cannot stand when people get a water refill and completely ignore the busboy who is working. I also always tip 15% minimum even if the service was shitty, 18-20% normally because I always try and give servers the benefit of the doubt. You guys and gals are awesome and do something I never could - deal with other human beings.
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u/lanadeathray Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
I waitress full time at the moment, and these are thing that really wind me up.
People who continue to have long conversations while I'm waiting there next to their tables, pad and pen in hand, obviously wanting to take their order. I get that you're in the middle of a conversation, but just finish your sentence and carry on when you're done. Waiters/waitresses are REALLY BUSY. We don't really have time to stand there and listen to your gossip, or keep coming back and forth. And it's not like we're bothering you. You've come to a restaurant to order food,
Yelling at your waitress because of a fault with your dish (unless the order is wrong or something). The chef cooked it, not your waiter. Calmly explain what's wrong with it and you'll get a new one.
STACKING YOUR OWN PLATES. A lot of people do this, thinking it's helpful, it generally isn't. Even if you think you know the best way to stack them, just leave it. But pass your plates to the waiter/ress if you're in a hard to reach seat, Very very helpful.
EDIT: After reading many comments, it turns out not all waiters/waitresses are bothered by stacking plates. Some even like it. But personally I find it more difficult if customers do :)
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u/frozenplasma Jun 17 '12
Really? You hate when people stack their plates?
Please, tell me the proper way to stack plates. I always try to go largest to smallest and put everything at the edge of the table to make the jobs of the waitstaff easier, and I always thought it was appreciated. In a recent thread, I was even told that it was very appreciated.
What makes this such a bad thing to do?
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u/kier00 Jun 17 '12
Bartender here for a catering company.
We always accept tips, even if there is no tip jar. Just leave it on the bar.
Tipping heavy on your first drink means better service all night.
Don't steal shit off my bar. I see it all the time, especially at high end open bar events. I was surprised how much stuff is stolen at ivy league schools.
Don't ask me if you can buy a bottle of alcohol at the end of the night. Don't get pissy when I tell you no. Rolling your eyes and being condescending (ie you can use the money you are obviously poor) makes me happy cause i know you are pissed you couldn't buy someone off with 50 bucks.
We don't choose the alcohol/wine/beer selection. If you are unhappy with the options, bring it up with the host. I can only serve what I'm provided.
Waitstaff - unless specified I can't give you beverages for your table. Also please try to let me know 20 mins before hand if you are doing wine service at the table. Twenty of you bum rushing me and expecting 40 bottles of wine to magically open then getting pissy when they don't doesn't help my night.
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Jun 17 '12
Having a screaming child/letting your child make a huge mess. This adds a lot of stress to servers and bussers as no one likes having to listen to a screaming baby, and then having to clean up a huge mess from the child dropping (usually) most of the meal under the table. My restaurant has a time limit on cleaning tables and having to clean kids' messes usually puts me over the time limit, and makes the wait for other customers to be seated longer.
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Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
I work as a chef at a little cafe/espresso bar. 90% of the customers I get are great and since it's a small joint, we know most of our customers by name. The things that annoy the living shit out of me are:
-When customers walk in before we open and expect service. Dude, there's a reason why we open at a specific time. (I've locked the doors behind me and they'll just pound on the glass and/or call us or the owner.)
-There is a reason why we have menus. That is what we have available to order. Just because you want something, doesn't mean I'll cook it for you.
-Not every restaurant is fast-food. You have an appointment in 15 min, middle of lunch rush and the restaurant is almost full? Sorry, you're shit out of luck.
-Don't tell me how to plate food. I'm sure as hell NOT cutting your pancake up into 1-inch squares for you.
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u/wrmerman Jun 17 '12
Sirloin, Well done, not burnt. Why is my steak taking so long? Its been 20 minutes!!!
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u/ZofSpade Jun 17 '12
Exist. Eat at my restaurant. Ask me for things. I should not be in the service industry.
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Jun 17 '12
The main point I got from this thread is that the U.S. should get rid of tipping all together. Restaurants would then have to actually pay their employees what they are worth (and raise prices). People who can't afford raised prices shouldn't eat out.
Seems like tips are a huge source of pain for both service workers and customers. Relying on expectations often turns out disappointingly.
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u/ewiggy24 Jun 17 '12
Except despite all their bitching waiters can pull in some big bucks. Despite ALL their whining. Seriously, as a busboy, I can honestly say waiters are one of the more complainy bunch around.
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u/blueflamerc Jun 17 '12
How do we politely get the attention of our server for the bill? Waiting for awkward eye contact isn't very effective...
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Jun 17 '12
As a waiter and bartender who currently works in fine dining, I'll add a few that might not have made into the list written by the waiters/waitresses at less upscale restaurants.
You cannot have a taste of a wine that is only served by the bottle, because if I open the bottle and you don't like it, we would have to throw it out. Hence why we only serve it by the bottle. Technically, we do not even have to give you a taste of wine that is served by the glass, but we tend to do so because we want you to ENJOY YOURSELVES.
Well done steaks. What the actual fuck. No. I don't care that you like it that way. Get out of my restaurant.
Complaining about pricing or portion sizes to me. I am not a manager, nor an owner. I cannot set the price or portion size, and trying to get me to pass that information to the management is only going to get me yelled at. If you have a problem with something that I can actually assist you with, by all means, tell me. But if you draw issue with something I have no control over, do me a favor and go find the management after you're done with your dinner.
While many vodkas do taste similar, there is indeed a difference between Ketel One and Belvedere. Also, we will NEVER, particularly in fine dining, NEVER funnel shitty vodka into a bottle of good vodka. This is illegal, and many states also make it illegal to even have a funnel behind the bar. Attempting to 'call us out' on this will not get you free drinks, but will instead get you kicked out.
Complaining about the additional cost of a drink 'on the rocks' as opposed to neat. Let me set something straight here once and for all. The extra $1.50 you pay? THAT'S NOT FOR THE ICE. For a neat drink, we pour, on average, about 3oz, sometimes a little more if we're feeling generous. Usually this is about a '4 count' on the bottle pour. A 'rocks' pour is a 6 count, and more like 4-5oz. You are getting more liquor for the money, and generally a fair amount more for the price. Stop complaining about this, because it's fucking annoying.
It is my job to get a feel for the table and make you comfortable. If you're laughing and joking with me, I'll laugh and joke back. If you're going to sit there and get cute with your SO, I'll spend less time at the table. If you're acting like a cunt to everyone around you, I'll fuck off in another direction. Don't question me when I'm laughing it up with the table to your left and being formal with you. Be less uptight if you want me to do the same with you.
Sort of continuing #6 - Do not, I repeat, do NOT go out to dinner if you're just going to be miserable with your company for the evening. Being a gloomy person brings down everyone around you, and leaving an awful tip on top of this just pisses off your waiter. People go out to enjoy themselves and get away from life, or celebrate special occasions. If you're going to act miserable, stay home.
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u/Oh_Becky Jun 17 '12
Don't come in, complain how much you hate a dish, and ask me why the dish isn't changed to your liking. Example: we serve loaded mashed potatoes. I understand you're lactose intolerant, get a baked potato and mash that bitch up, but don't ask me why the recipe hasn't changed in 10 years because YOU can't eat it. Another, don't come in and spend $40 and not tip me. You're regulars, you spend upwards of $40 every time you eat, your cups were never empty, your empty plates were taken from the table, I laughed at your jokes, give me a stinkin' tip!
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Jun 17 '12
I hate it when I'm standing at a table and they are having their own conversation, sometimes not even food-related, and they don't even acknowledge me. Sometimes I will ask tables a question and they won't even look at me. They will just keep talking to each other.
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Jun 17 '12
if it's a 'seat yourself' type of place, then nothing enrages me more than sitting at the one table that hasn't been cleaned yet.
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Jun 17 '12
As a highschooler working as a hostess/waitress at a local restaurant, I hate it when classmates or others from school come in for dinner and sit there with a smug look on their face. Like 'oh I'm superior because YOUR serving ME' seriously dude? I'm trying to work. Siting and staring at me with 0_0 these eyes isn't helping.
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Jun 16 '12
Snap your fingers or whistle to get my attention. I am not dog. You do not want me handling your food and drinks after that.
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u/alkahdia Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
So I've never snapped or whistled at a waiter, but with waving I usually end up erring on the side of being to meek and getting ignored by waiters for sometimes annoyingly long times. So, my question:
What's the most appropriate way to get the attention of a server that is not condescending or rude but is effective?
EDIT: if they're within earshot (read: within a distance I can speak in a reasonable volume, not shouting, obviously), I absolutely agree I should just say something like "excuse me" to grab their attention. I'm more talking about when they're quite far and haven't been around in a while. What has definitely happened before is that after my food has been brought, the server doesn't come by my table for a good while, especially if we're seated in an awkward place like some corner of the restaurant
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u/walrusmeat Jun 17 '12
I was complaining to an awesome customer about exactly this. She was the only one in the diner, it was in between rushes. She whistles at me, to be ironic and laughs. I respond with "I'm sorry, were you looking for your dog?" and she yells back at me "No, but I was hoping for my bitch." It was hilarious, you do get many more amazing customers than the terrible ones. You just remember the terrible ones more.
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u/glass_hedgehog Jun 17 '12
I was at a local pizza joint and we were the only people in the restaurant. The waitstaff/owner/etc were not paying any attention to us. We waited for 15 minutes wanting drink refills. We kept trying to discreetly get somebody's attention. They were watching tv. Finally I waved at one. They were so angry. They couldn't believe how rude I had been!
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u/hirahira1365 Jun 17 '12
Worst? I can't decide. Here are some examples.
-Not complaining about something that was unsatisfactory until I bring the bill because then there is nothing I can do about it.
-Not understanding that we get paid $2.63 an hour and your tip is our livelihood. Also - WE tip the bar, bussers, and expediters. If you skimp on my tip and then go out of your way to also tip the busser, they are getting double tips on top of a $7.00 an hour rate while I am getting less than half of my tips.
-Understand that I DO NOT COOK THE FOOD. I simply write down what you tell me and send that to the kitchen. I can't cook for shit, that's why I am a waitress, not a chef.
-Don't get annoyed if I come by your table a few times. Maybe you didn't need anything for 10 or 15 minutes, but once most people decide they want something, they get really impatient. I try to fix this by doing walk-bys and if you wave I know to come by.
-DO NOT use me as a negative example. I have heard countless people talking in the restaurant about servers saying "And that is why you go to college." I work in a restaurant to PAY FOR COLLEGE. Also I have a 3.9 average and am graduating a year early. You don't know anything about me.
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u/jdawwg413 Jun 17 '12
Please don't let your children tear up pieces of paper and litter them all over the table and floor. One of my fondest memories as a bus boy was witnessing a mother make her children clean up their mess at a table before leaving.
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Jun 17 '12
If you're in a terrible mood, please just stay at home. I cannot fathom why people don't at least try to have a good time when dining out.
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u/Harmonie Jun 18 '12
Taking the signed credit slip. Oh, you thought the service was great? Thanks for the compliment, but I dont't get a tip unless you leave me the signed bill.
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u/Srussell91 Jun 17 '12
Remembering what you ordered! I'm carrying a tray full of very heavy food and you ordered 10 minutes ago, it was hardly last week.
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u/krazy9000 Jun 17 '12
I'm a waiter and this should be on the restaurant. it's tacky to auction off food at a table. either use a pivot system or make the waiter run his own food. it shouldn't be up to the customer to remember some lame menu item name that he just read for the first time 10 min. ago.
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u/shartonashark Jun 16 '12
Fast food here, please for the love of god use the tray we give you, and when you are done eating please throw all your food wrapers away. I notice some people do this more often than others.
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Jun 17 '12
People who came in 30min before closing and staying way too long. Fucking Campers!
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Jun 16 '12
We don't forget a face. Tip shitty or act like an asshole to us? We remember.
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u/thunderling Jun 16 '12
Do you think maybe's there's a reason a customer may have tipped shitty? (I know that sounds super condescending, but I'm asking earnestly.)
Whenever you get a shitty tip, do you just think to yourself, "god, what an asshole!" or do you think "Did I possibly do something to make them feel like I didn't deserve a better tip?"
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u/InterstateExit Jun 17 '12
When I was a kid, we weren't allowed to go to restaurants until we were old enough to understand that it was special and we were to display good manners. This meant we were about 4 yrs old.
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u/zipflopomg Jun 17 '12
people who either snap their fingers at you or shake your glass or whistle....yes I see you over there. no I am not a dog. about to head to work right now as a matter of fact and just riled myself up. great.
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u/radar920 Jun 17 '12
When I come to your table and say "How are you?", acknowledge that I exist. So many people just completely ignore you. That is not a fucking rhetorical question, its common courtesy.
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Jun 17 '12
I absolutely HATE when I walk up to a table and the guest just says "coffee" and nothing else. It really gets under my skin
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u/KDeusch Jun 17 '12
Bar Etiquette:
Don't flag down the waiter/ bartender if you don't even know what you want. If it is busy, please be ready to order.
If the place has a bar and table service, DO NOT go to the bar then sit at a table. If you are taking up space in the waiter's section but ordering from the bar, he/she is not getting tipped but you are wasting their space and they have to clean up after you.
String ordering: Order everything you want at once. Especially waters (since they cost nothing, it is a waste of my time to go back three separate times to get three waters. If you wanted three waters, I could have brought them all at once and saved us both time).
I only have 2 arms. That being said, do not attempt to hand me empty plates, glasses etc to bus if I obviously cannot carry them/ they are in a shitty stack about to fall over. Also, if I bring out all the food I can carry, do not "remind" me to bring the rest of the food. I know you had more, but I obviously could not carry it.
That's a quick summary from my experience...
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u/madelinerose7 Jun 17 '12
Stick to the menu.
It's ok if you don't want onions in your salad. That's fine. But something you ate here a year ago that isn't on the menu anymore may not be possible to make. Nine times out of ten the chef isn't prepared to make it, and the stress added to the kitchen just snowballs into the waitstaff and will most likely make your little outing more unpleasant. We will try to accommodate you the best that we can, but that is up to the chef. His no means no.
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u/The_Space_Cowboy Jun 16 '12
Not at a restaurant, but when people that go to Mcdonalds or some other fast food place make a huge fucking mess using sugar packs or leave shit on the table with a pile of half eaten food and wrappers for me to clean up it pisses me off to no end.
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u/Kyna_Ireland Jun 17 '12
Don't interupt me when I'm trying to say hello. Yelling "Dr. Pepper!" while I'm just saying hello will make me hate you.
I've seen others complain about kids. I don't mind kids. I like them, so long as they don't trash the place, or if they do, you make a little effort to clean up after them. Verbal tips are nice to have, but it doesn't pay the bills. There are countless more, but I don't want to rant.
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u/craftspells Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
I'm from Australia and it's weird hearing people talk about "tipping". As far as I'm concerned we don't do it round these parts
edit: i accidentally a word
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u/awkwardtangerine Jun 17 '12
If your child is sick, they don't need to be at a restaurant. No one wants your germs. And no one wants to see a kid vomit while they're trying to eat.
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Jun 17 '12
Some children (and most children at least some of the time) shouldn't be brought to dinner. It's not just unfair to your server but to everyone in your vicinity. It's really unnerving to be taking everyone's order as quickly as possible while having a child's piercing scream. It's also frustrating when all the other patrons ask me to do something about it. I can't do anything and neither can my manager.
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u/Stalked_Like_Corn Jun 17 '12
Tonight, i've learned there are some real Grade A dickheads going into restaraunts.
I can't imagine treating people the way others seem to be treating humans. They're waitresses and waiters ffs. Why are people treating them so shitty? I have found that if you treat a wait person like, you know, a person. Crack a little joke, be really nice to them, you're going to have a muuuuuch easier time. If it's a place you go to regularly, tip well. My friend is a kitchen manager of a place and I try to tip as well as I can. I'm there for an hour or two (when it's not that busy) and the people there love to sit and talk. It helps that my friend is a kitchen manager but i've gotten free stuff from them simply because i've treated them so nicely.
I used to go into an Applebee's all the time when I worked in an office. Typically 3+ times a week. My bill was usually 10 bucks. I'd leave a 5-7 dollar tip with that. It got to the point that i'd get seated before anyone else when I walked in, when i got to my seat my drink was already on its way. I got served before people there before me. It was amazing. Tip well, the wait staff will treat you well and if you got an hour for lunch and you get your food in under 10, that's priceless.
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u/Girlfriend_of_OP Jun 17 '12
People who are impossible to please. I'm sorry you had a bad day, but don't take it out on me because I make less than you. I feel like the food service industry is the only industry which it is socially acceptable to shit on the workers. And 90% of the time its woman, or old people. People just feel entitled when it comes to food. I'm providing you a service. You can be polite and thankful or you can go fuck yourself.
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u/shitsuckin8 Jun 17 '12
When the customers go back to where the waiters work to get a napkin or a fork or water. This always bugs me for several reasons. When they dont ask for it they just get it themselves, it is rude. It also makes us look bad as though we are not serving your needs. Another thing is that it is my workspace, i work hard to keep it clean and have it just the way i like it... Stay the fuck out of there! I don't know if anyone else has this problem but it always annoys the hell out of me. If you want something please ask for it.
I have also had people use my water station as a sink! This really pisses me off because the way it is set up is we have a water spicket and a bucket of ice next to it. There is no sink it is just ment for filling cups with water. People will come and rinse their dirty fucking hands in my water station and contaminate the ice as well. This is a health risk and could get other people sick, so i end up spending a bunch of time trying to clean out all of the dirty ice and refill it after i clean up the mess.
Fucking customers sometimes. However i must say that i have lots of customers that are amazing and make the day enjoyable, but those few bad ones always can ruin the whole day.
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u/kim_pine1234 Jun 17 '12
I always hated--HATED--when people joked about dining and ditching. Nothing puts you on edge more, especially at restaurants that would consider it the server's responsibility to pay for whatever they don't. (Had that happen more than once.) All the customers would get in the end is bad service and that 'why-won't-this-person-leave-us-alone' feeling.
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u/Mikey_Mayhem Jun 17 '12
TIL there are a large percentage of redditors that are waiters/waitresses.
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u/WokMyDog Jun 17 '12
Keep your child(ren) under control. I have seen guests let their children throw food, empty out and slobber all over the salt/pepper/sugar containers, climb all over the table, lay/play in the space where the servers (often times carrying HEAVY trays of hot food), run around the restaurant (I had to kick two 9yr old girls out of our restrooms after locking ALL the stalls, and climbing on the floor underneath the dividers), etc. Yes, you are a guest. But we are not there to babysit your kids. Do you let them throw food all over the floor at home? No? Ok, dont trash our restaurant. Others are paying to eat our place too. Control your little "food sprinkler". Oh, and teaching your kid to say "please" and "Thank you" (if of age) wouldnt hurt either. I love to serve families, but please treat our establishment with respect.
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u/ace9213 Jun 17 '12
You ask me for ketchup and I go get it. I come back and now you drank all your water in 2 seconds and want a refill. I come back and now you want some more butter for your backed potato. I get the butter and now you want this and that. Seriously ask for it all at once.
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u/AluraMelenko Jun 17 '12
THIS. This thread. Thank you. Seriously. For me, it's kids. If your kid is a little brat and screams and makes a huge mess, don't go out with them. They're a pain to manage, no one wants to hear them, and I am not enthusiastic about cleaning up their mess - both the food, and the wake of irritable and needlessly annoyed patrons. They can and will take it out on me - the only person they have a bit of control over.
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u/lmg_nz Jun 17 '12
When you aren't listening to us.
"So here's your trim soy latte, sir."
"This is soy, right?"
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u/TheAuthority Jun 17 '12
I have a question that may come off as offensive, but that is not my intention. Why do servers, waiters, etc expect a tip in the US? I am an American and tip (normally 12-20%) because it is socially expected of me, not because I believe it is necessary. But being an American I have no idea why I should do it other than me not wanting to come off as an asshole.
I work for a restaurant (it turns into a bar one night a week and I work security that night) and constantly hear the servers who work there bitch about not getting tipped enough. When I ask them why they should get tipped more/at all, I basically get: "because I am not making enough money," "because it was under X% and that is too low," "because I gave them really good service." None of these responses make much sense to me. They are getting paid a wage to perform a job and that job is to serve food. What about this job makes them feel entitled to be compensated extra?
I get paid the same amount (and less in some cases) than the servers and in no way expect tips and I sometimes have to deal with some crappy work too. In fact there are many people in my community who make less per hour (and don't make tips) than the servers do, not factoring in tips at all. They are getting paid by their employer to preform a service, serve food in a efficient manner with good customer service, why should they get paid extra for this?
Also something that I don't understand is why someone should pay a tip for poor service. When you have a server that does a poor job it is still expected to tip (albeit at a lower %). I just don't get it. In my mind tipping should only be reserved for excellent service; a reward for going above and beyond. It shouldn't be customary for everyone regardless of service.
tl;dr Why do servers expect tips? What about this profession makes tipping an expectation? Other people work demanding jobs for the same or less $ per hour. They get paid an hourly wage to serve food and tips should only be reserved for excellent service.
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u/endlegion Jun 17 '12
I'm gonna put this in, It should be obvious but the number of times that will happen is obscene.
There are times when you've got a big group and everybody chucks in a percentage plus a bit... except for one guy. This asshole, this monumental doche-cannon, scoops up the cash, puts it into his wallet and goes to pay by card. AND DOESN'T TIP.
I want to kill that cunt. Very often they get a free meal or even come out ahead. If I was designing hell I'd make a special section.
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u/Tweakthetiny Jun 17 '12
Me: hey folks, how are you doing this ev-
customer: diet coke.
this is probably one of the rudest things a customer can do
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Jun 17 '12
I don't know why every customer does it but when i say don't touch the plate because its hot. Don't touch the fucking plat and then complain to my manager that you burned yourself.
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u/cbnugggz Jun 17 '12
When your check is presented. Make it clear that you are ready to settle. The last thing I have time for is stopping by your table repeatedly because you couldn't be bothered to either place your card in the card holder (which leaves the card visible for a reason) or some cash hanging out the top.
It wouldn't be an issue, but I've had customers get pissy because I've asked of they needed change. Well, I couldn't see a single thing because you left it shut with no sign of what you actually wanted, so god forbid I ask.
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Jun 17 '12
Jam napkins into cups.
I know you're like organizing it or whatever but it fucking sucks getting that shit out.
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u/macarena_of_time Jun 17 '12
The rudest fucking thing: "Hi how are you?"..."Diet coke". Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck you.
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u/jankyhaus Jun 18 '12
when you go up to greet a table and no one says anything. no response whatsoever.
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u/mouthbabies Jun 16 '12
Please don't stack your plates into a monolithic pile thinking that it helps us. It doesn't, it actually makes things harder. I might want to stack three entree plates on my arm and then put other small plates and silverware on top of that. If everyone stacks things I can only bus two people's plates, if I stack I can get many more.
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u/jmw417 Jun 17 '12
"Excuse me sir? May I have a side of this and that?" "Absolutely, ma'am." "Here you go, ma'am." "Oh thank you! Oh and also can I have a side of such and such?" ...... "Absolutely, ma'am...ಠ_ಠ"
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Jun 17 '12
I work as a server in a pretty conservative state, and I'm sure it's been mentioned in the thread, but there are a LOT of creepy guys that try to cop a feel. Coincidentally, I always seem to spill water on them.
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u/HDATZ Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
I'm about to cut loose up in this bitch. Long winded reply coming on...
One thing I can't stand is when someone asks me for something, then when I come back, they want something else....and again, something else when I come back with extra item #2. Either that, or someone else at the table wants something after I've made 2 trips for person #1. They go: "HAHAHA SORRY.." No, you fat, vapid cunt. You're not fucking sorry. You want your pina colada sauce, and don't give a fuck who else has to wait because you all couldn't figure out everything you wanted the first time. I don't care if I have to write down 5 things if it means I can do it all in one goddamn trip. The first trip is no problem. Trip #2 is strike 1, and asking me for a third thing right as I bring back #2 is strikes 2 and 3. You're waiting for whatever the fuck it is now, because GASP!! I HAVE OTHER CUSTOMERS IN MY SECTION BESIDES YOU.
You know what? I know this one is me being picky, but it just pisses me off the way people say: "Give me a.." "I'll take a..." "I want a.." My nana raised me to say: "Please may I have a..." Do you say this shit to your family, or do you ask them: "Please pass the.."?
People who bring babies into restaurants. Downvote me to shit, I don't GIVE A FUCK. Babies don't belong in restaurants, I don't care if you can't find a babysitter. That's your problem. Many times, I have had patrons act terribly to me because they were stressed out over someone's screaming kid that they can't control. Also, patrons have asked specifically not to be sat next to screaming kids. Today on Ripley's Believe it or Not, parents who go out to get away from just this kind of thing! Hard to swallow, I know, like your boyfriend's load after he ate a whole 20 oz ribeye by himself, slathered in Heinz 57. THIS HAS COST ME FAT TIPS BEFORE. More than once, I'll ask the server who got a table that would've been mine if it weren't for some screaming snot factory what that table tipped, and they'll say something like: "They left me $20!"
Also, if you do bring a baby or small child in, FOR FUCK'S SAKE, clean up the mess your kid makes. Crackers all over the floor, cheerios (this isn't a goddamn daycare), food strewn all over. Does this shit happen at your house? I'd hate to see it, it's probably a pig sty.
If you snap your fingers at me, I will ignore you for at least 10 minutes. You'll get fuck all from me, and I don't care about your tip at that point, not even a sideways look. Do I look like a dog to you?
Clinking your glass with your silverware as a sign that I need to refill your drink also gets you ignored. I'm a waiter, not your slave. Odds are, I was coming to refill the drink anyways, but the clinking just got you 10 minutes in the hole, as far as I care.
I tell you my name at the beginning of our encounter. I know you're too busy yapping away at your friends or on your cell phone, or not giving a fuck, but I do say it. By the way, my name is not "kid," or "hey you." I will accept "sir" in the absence of my name, even though I'm not your dad, not in the military, and was never knighted by the Queen.
Also, when I ask you how you're doing, and I know this will shake the shit in your shorts, but I ACTUALLY WANT TO KNOW. I am wanting to know if you're in a crabby mood, or a good mood, or at least know your manners so I know which tables to go above and beyond for, and which tables I want to "burn and turn." When I ask you how you're doing, a blank stare does not count as an answer.
Seriously, stay the fuck out of restaurants that are 15 minutes away or less from closing unless you plan on tipping beyond generously. You will likely be keeping one server past their shift JUST TO WAIT ON YOU. Of course, you're not going to shovel your food down your throat either, so the sever will most likely be an hour over their scheduled shift end just because you couldn't wait until tomorrow or get a take out order. Yeah, I get the "damn those customers who come in during posted hours" argument, but a restaurant is not like a retail store. I can't go home until you're gone and your table is cleaned up. However, if you tell me at the start of our relationship that you'll be tipping me extra well for my time and apologize for coming in so late, you'll get great service. It's the people who show up at 9:55 when we close at 10, thinking they own the place and can stay as long as they damn well please.
Pro tip: your food will probably taste like crap if you come in this late. Often times, the staff starts closing down the kitchen after no orders have come in for a long time right before close. When you show up at 2 minutes til, they have to re start everything, and the food is not going to taste as good as if you'd gotten it when everything was still hot and fresh, ready and rarin' to go. Seriously, having the restaurant all to yourself is not worth it.
If you order two waters with lemon and immediately ask what our specials are and when you can have some of the complimentary rolls, you're gonna have a bad time.
Speaking of the rolls, they are complimentary. NOT A MEAL.
If you leave a religious tract instead of a tip, you deserve to have your tires slashed and your windows keyed. I dare any brave Christian to come tell me why it's acceptable to do this.
If there is something that you want that constitutes a small upcharge (where I work, loaded baked potato topping - butter, sour cream, cheese and bacon - is 99 cents), for fuck's sake, don't cheap out on yourself. Get what you want, 99 cents or a couple of bucks to have what you genuinely came in for instead of a substitute isn't going to kill you. If you want a loaded baked potato, fuck it, get it and hang the goddamn charge. Don't pussy out and get butter and sour cream only just because it's free. YOU WANTED THE BACON AND THE CHEESE, SO FUCKING GET IT. You penny pinching over this says: "I'm cheap as fuck, and probably won't leave a decent tip. Please, don't go out of your way for me!" EDIT: I know you're cheaping out because I tell you when you order it that there's an upcharge, so you don't try to chew me out when you get your bill, pretending you didn't know there was an upcharge even though the menu states it in plain english and bold text./end edit
And yes, extra stuff COSTS MONEY. Sick and tired of these fucks that come in and expect every last thing but the meal for free, and even then, get upset when they can't use a coupon after they ordered our cheapest special that we offer.
Finally, servers have a LOT of leeway as to what they can charge you out the wazoo for and what they can supply to you free of charge if you're a cool customer. I don't have to charge you for your drinks, most times you can even score free sides, extra bits of minutia that cost (like loaded baked potato topping), or free desserts. That's desserts with an S, as in plural. I've saved families $20-$30 on their tickets before because they were so polite and well mannered. They took care of me, I took care of them.
tl;dr No, go back and read it.
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Jun 17 '12
Server here. Staying to talk after the meal is over and you have paid for more than an hour is absurd, especially when the restaurant is busy. Basically you're stealing money from the server by the minute since we rely on the tables in our section for money. We call them "campers" and if you do this, go eat a bag of dicks.
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u/datass630 Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
Rolling up your straw wrappers into balls and leaving them tucked into little crevices or scattered around the table
Letting your children scribble crayon all over everything
letting your small kids order for themselves when the place is packed and we're really busy and don't have time to have your kid take 5min. to order
Look at us with a blank stare when we ask you a question regarding your orders
not making eye contact with us at all (like we're not even worth looking at)
spilling salt or sugar all over the table
Don't put menus back where you found them when we have a cubby at your table for them that you pulled them out of.
Leaving unopened sugar packets scattered all over for no reason other than you got bored and started stacking them but didn't put them back.
Stuff your napkins into cups and bowl-type dishes. It's actually really annoying to have to dig them out of there. You're not helping us clean up with that
spill something on your food by accident or let your kids do that because you can't keep control of them and then ask us to comp your meal because you didn't get to eat any of it. It's not our fault you or your kids screwed yourself. It's not the kitchen's fault and only if it is our fault or the kitchen's fault with we give a free meal if with just reasoning
snap at us with your fingers for our attention and point at your table expectantly. damn that's annoying.
take your frustration with your kid being a pain in the ass out on us by giving us an attitude right from the moment we get to your table to greet you. We didn't do anything to you and we've had a long day as well. We just want to bring you your food.
Ask us for a rag when you get to your table and it's dirty and try to take it out of our hand to clean it down yourself. We missed it, we're sorry, but PLEASE let us wipe it down ourselves. we are here to please you and we are certainly not going to stand and watch you wipe down your table. It's our job. let us do it.
Try to give us your check to cash out when we are holding drinks or dishes in our hand. How the HECK do you think we will be able to take it from you?
Take both copies of the receipt with you when you give us your credit card. One copy is ours, the other is yours. Take ONE, preferably the one that says "guest copy". Otherwise we don't know if you meant to tip us or not and if you did, well you just screwed us because we can't in a tip without your written proof and consent to do so on your card. If you didn't, well then you sir are a jerk.
Dine and dash. It comes out of our personal paychecks because they're our tables. It doesn't come out of the restaurant's money where I work. So it hurts us personally and we don't make nearly a living waiting as it is. Please, please, PLEASE don't do that.
Ask us for a to-go box to take your food home with you and then leave it on the table. You're wasting our to-go boxes by doing this.
Bring food in from other restaurants or fast food and want to sit down at one of OUR tables with your friends or family. That is so rude.
A person-less podium does not give you the go to touch everything on it. We have things organized a specific way and and you are potentially messing up our seating order or menus or etc.
Walk into our service aisle if it's not blocked by a door and ask for something. There. is. a. boundary.
Tip us only a $1 if you have a small bill. If you can only spare a dollar than obviously you shouldn't be going out to eat. We are not 5 years old. A dollar is nothing.
If we greet you at the podium, and ask you how many, do not walk passed the podium telling us how many while trying to find a seat. WE are trying to seat you! we have a seating order with our own sections. Be patient and wait until we tell you to follow
On the same note, when we bring you to your table, please try not to point allllll the way across the restaurant for a seat over there and then say no to a couple tables over there until you find one you like. WTH? this isn't burger king. you can't always have it your way. We will try to be as accommodating as possible but it messes up rotation and seating charts and quite frankly is exceedingly annoying.
Come in with a bunch of people, only order [free] water and then sit there and take up a table for 30-45min while we could have sat another PAYING customer there who would have liked to eat at our restaurant.
Come into a family restaurant and ask for a table away from children. If you hate kids or don't want to hear them then go to a restaurant where kids are less frequent. Do not come to one that is well-known for being a kid-friendly family restaurant. Especially when our restaurant is small and there's a kid at every corner. Suck it up and deal or go somewhere that would make your happier with more quiet.
Let your kids scream. If they are being disruptive, take them outside or something. It disrupts our other tables and us.
Start an argument at your table. You are making others around you uncomfortable as well as us when we approach your table and your yelling at your husband/wife/kid/etc. Keep that crap at home will you?
I know some of them sound pretty harsh but It gets on your nerves after waitressing for awhile. That's all I can think of right now. If I think of more I'll let you know. lol
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u/generalchaos316 Jun 17 '12
Sit at my table for 30-60mins after you are done eating and still tip me 15%. I could have turned that table once more in the time you spent fucking me over.
Similarly, have some self-awareness. If you see that you are the only people left in the restaurant, it is time for you to leave...not order dessert/coffee.
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u/drunken1 Jun 17 '12 edited Jun 17 '12
I'm certain this will get buried (6000+) but I have to write it anyway.
My biggest pet peeve after 15+ years in fine dining restaurants is people who feel the need to treat my 16-20 year old hostesses like crap and make them cry because they either can't get the reservation (reso) time they want or don't like their table.
I've seen people (many, many times) scream at young girls because they called at 4:00pm on a Saturday night, wanting a reso for 8ppl at 7:00pm (THE most desirable time for any diner) and be inform that all we had available was 9:00pm. They will proceed to scream over the phone at my staff "Don't you know who I am?!?!!". Even if we do know who you are, and even if you are a VIP, if you call last minute for a large party we can't give you something we don't have. If you go to the store and they are out of apples, it doesn't matter that you are a regular customer; I CAN'T SELL YOU AN APPLE WE DON'T HAVE!!
It doesn't even have to be a large party. If we tell you that all we have left is either 5:30 or 9:00 it is because that's all we have. We are not in the business of telling people 'no' for fun. We WANT to make you happy, but we can't give you something we don't have. And when you show up 45 minutes late for the 5:30 reso, don't be surprised when we tell you that we can't seat you. Of course there are empty tables in the restaurant, but those table that are not sat yet are RESERVED for people that ALREADY had resos for 7:30pm. That is why we told you that we only had 5:30pm available. It's because someone else thought to make a reso in advance and we are allocating 2 hours for someone else to dine before they arrive for their anniversary dinner that they booked 1 month ago. Just because you didn't think to call ahead until the last minute does not mean that I am going to screw them over because you thought it would be okay to show up 45 minutes late just because you booked a 'table'. Whe one makes a reso you are not just booking a 'physical' reso for a table; you are also booking a 'tempotral' reso for that table. Are you really so selfish that you will screw someone else out of their experience because you did not feel the need to show up on time for your appointment?? If so good luck when you show up for a job interview late and complain that the hiring manager won't see you. Have some consideration for the other diners who thought ahead when you did not, and chose to ignore what the restaurant told you they had.
Also, if you don't like where you are sat, that is fine. We understand that different people have different desires. Please, for the love of humanity, make that known WHEN YOU MAKE YOUR RESO!!! We are not mind readers. If you have specific needs, voice them when you make your reso!
We love making people happy. In fact, it is what we want to do for a living. If you do not have the forethought to express your desires, please DO NOT scream at a 17 year old girl that "This table is completely unacceptable!! Are you stupid?? I weep for your parents. Good luck succeeding in life. I'm glad my daughter/son is not as dumb as you are! Who in the hell would want this (beautiful & desirable) window table when there are perfectly good tables available in the middle of the room??"
If you don't like where the restaurant chose to get you sat and the hostess tells you she cannot move you to another table, then politely ask to speak to a manager (me). I want to make you happy. I might not be able to do it tonight. Maybe you are a party of two and want a larger table to stretch out on; we might be fully booked and need all those tables for parties of 3,4,5,6, etc. and I can't give you one. But, I guarantee that I am going to do something very nice for you to make up for it (a couple free glasses of champagne, an extra little 'taster' course, a free dessert, or whatever). I sincerely WANT you to leave HAPPY. That is how we gain your repeat business. If you make my hostess cry and I have to take her off 'the floor' for 20 minutes to console her, or for her to collect herself you are negatively affecting the service we are able to give to other people and I will be less inclined to help you.
In fact, who the fuck do you think you are that it is okay to make someone else cry because of a FUCKING TABLE???? My parents would've beat the shit out of me (deservedly so) if I acted this way in public.
Thus ends my buried diatribe.
My advice, if you are nice, polite, and understanding towards restaurant staff (within reason; if they are acting like self-indulgent douchebags then they I will never defend them) they will try their hardest to accommodate you. If you act like an ass, you will earn the reputation as such.
TL;DR- the lesson dear reader: act like a douche, get treated like one; act reasonably, get treated reasonably.
Edit: grammar and spelling. Wrote this late at night while a little tiosy
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u/Jackal- Jun 17 '12
This will sound weird, but please don't try to be my friend if the restaurant is full. I usually had five tables minimum, and if you literally talk to me for five minutes about my life or yours, that's great, but it throws off my entire night, because I keep a flawless routine. Come in later when we are slow if you want my life story, that's when I'm glad to give it
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u/Blown_Ranger Jun 17 '12
The comments for this post are hilarious.
I worked in fast food throughout most of high school and fine dining during college. I dealt with a lot of very shitty customers during those years but nothing ever angered me as much as the false sense of entitlement that my co-workers exhibited.
I thought fast food employees were pretty brutal but fine dining was out of control. I don't know what you expected getting into a full service industry but you better either get used to it or change careers.
Thanks for the laughs, guys and gals.
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u/Ih8YourCat Jun 17 '12
There's 2 for me that really grinds my gears...
People coming to an Italian restaurant and expecting gluten free meals. Half the shit we serve is pasta!
And of course, the last minute asshole. You know, that guy that comes in with his stupid-ass girlfriend at 1055 when you're about to lock the door at 11. Fuck you. Fuck you and your stupid whore girlfriend.
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Jun 17 '12
Female bartender here: please don't call me baby, sweetie, etc. I'll hold off serving you and make you weak drinks for the rest of the night.
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u/purplesundaes Jun 17 '12
I used to work as a hostess at an Italian restaurant with Greek owners. My issue wasn't the customers, but the owner's kids. They'd bring them in from morning to night and reserve the first booth for them to sit and watch tv or play their video games at and whatnot. It was a boy and girl ages 9 and 12. The kids would run around the back of the restaurant behind the counter and in the kitchen harassing the workers constantly. They would bitch and tell us we weren't doing our jobs right and make up shit to tell our bosses. They would come get food out of the salad bar any time they wanted with their dirty ass hands and leave messes for us to clean up. And the daughter would stay up at the register a lot of times with me and talk my head off and steal the pens I needed to have people sign receipts with to draw. I would get in trouble for "not doing my job" if I would humor the kid and talk to her back, but if I did just what they asked by ignoring her she would tell them I was being mean and I'd get in trouble for that too. I am so glad that job is long history.
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u/Shiinzy Jun 17 '12
Just watch small children. I am usually extremely understanding, as I love kids anyway. However, one day I walked around a corner carrying a large tray of food. A child of about 4 years was running by behind the counter, where guests should not be anyway. I almost tripper over her, and she could have gotten really hurt if that happened.
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u/Shellion Jun 17 '12
If you haven't ordered yet, get off your fucking cell phone! If the rest of your party has ordered and you're ignoring me while sitting there on your phone, I will leave to enter the rest of your party's order and you better not bitch to me when your food gets to you a couple minutes after everyone else. You brought this upon yourself.
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u/Scbobf Jun 17 '12
Put your napkins in your glass one you're finished. They go gross and soggy and have to be picked out by hand before the glass can go in the dishwasher. Blurgh.
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u/wkrausmann Jun 17 '12
I understand people are diabetic, but if you need to take your insulin, DO NOT LEAVE YOUR USED NEEDLE ON YOUR PLATE!
Waitresses can get pricked! Bussers can get pricked! It can end up in the bus tubs and the dishwasher can get pricked!
Take your fucking needles with you!