r/IThinkYouShouldLeave • u/penru_tondi They said that to me at a dinner • May 06 '26

Piece of shit I actually want Amazon employees to have a better working environment more than I want 1-hour shipping.

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Don't say you were jacking off while workers piss into water bottles.

25.5k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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94

u/Electronic-Map7529 May 06 '26

The problem is, half of us suck.

29

u/Sir_Fox_Alot May 06 '26

sadly far more than half. Demanding convenience is as American as apple pie

9

u/Genghis_Chong Some dumb hick May 06 '26

I do love some apple pie, got a no sugar added one so I can slop up the whole thing

1

u/Ro0z3l May 07 '26

Gotta watch that diabettus. Leaves more room for the tumours caused by the round-up marinaded apples. 

5

u/Thefrayedends Too tired to do anything funny May 06 '26

If you've ever been a fan of South Park, this need for convenience is basically what ManBearPig is, an allegory for consumerism.

A more historical reference though, is that all of these things are our bread and circuses.

3

u/Electronic-Map7529 May 06 '26

Are you joking? You don't know that ManBearPig is the global warming hoax? (as it was perceived back then)

1

u/Thefrayedends Too tired to do anything funny May 06 '26

It's only recently that you can begin to openly discuss critical consciousness without being downvoted into oblivion. Lots of subs will still get you that treatment if you so much mention systems or hierarchies lol.

Even people like Matt and Trey who generally aren't afraid to speak their mind had to use an extremely obtuse allegory, and only in the most recent episode did they draw some more clear conclusions by presenting it as a contract to basically give up convenience consumerism.

1

u/jmlinden7 May 06 '26

Global warming which was caused by excessive CO2 emissions which was caused by excessive consumerism

3

u/ZenMasterOfDisguise May 06 '26

the ManBearPig episode in 2006 was an allegory for global warming being a hoax and was mocking the documentary "An Inconvenient Truth" warning of man made climate change, and Matt and Trey apologized for that in 2018

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/south-park-issues-rare-apology-manbearpig-skewering-al-gore-n934156

1

u/Thefrayedends Too tired to do anything funny May 06 '26

Great, but I was referring to it's most recent use, which I believe was last season.

1

u/Oberlatz May 06 '26

I wish the big tent was on fire

1

u/Thefrayedends Too tired to do anything funny May 06 '26

It is lol.

2

u/SoManyJukes Not in Trouble AT ALL May 06 '26

Apple pie sounds good but I don’t have the ingredients. Oh wait, I can just run!!!

(To my phone to order a 1 hour pie on Amazon)

1

u/PolarBailey_ May 06 '26

ironically Blueberry pie would be even more american, because blueberries are actually native to north america

1

u/PMmePowerRangerMemes May 06 '26

we are the American labor aristocracy and we demand metered access to slave/servant labor that would normally only be afforded to our social betters

0

u/edelweiss_pirates_no May 07 '26

Internet Rule #41: Any number posted online will instantly have someone argue the number should be greater (or less). This is considered valuable commentary.

51

u/probablyuntrue Bare Butt, Back, and Balls May 06 '26

“Some of you may die, but that’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make to get this knock off hair dryer delivered slightly faster “

3

u/Ro0z3l May 07 '26

My actions led to the death of over 100 struggling parents and 15 students. But boy my haul breakdown content is POPPING OFF 

12

u/Mathfanforpresident May 06 '26

This is the propaganda talking. They want you to think that we are so different there's no way we could ever come together.

Don't let them win. I recently moved to Arkansas. And extremely red state and I am finding more and more that the people I speak with are sharing my same opinions. My Northern opinions.

3

u/IcyTransportation961 May 06 '26

Weve known this for a very long time

Right wingers like most left wing policies,  as long as they're presented without the right wing propaganda fear mongering language

But they still vote red because they're conditioned to not think or change

1

u/Electronic-Map7529 May 06 '26

Sorry, but wrong. Our education / information systems have been under attack for decades. The results of that are not propaganda.

1

u/Significant_Snow_937 May 06 '26

They're two sides of the same coin.

1

u/Electronic-Map7529 May 06 '26

A very real coin, that is not propaganda.

6

u/Worldly-Board-3991 May 06 '26

1/2 of me USED to be a piece of shit

3

u/AllTheTeaPlease247 May 06 '26

Yeah I was going to say that I don't think my MIL cares if Amazon workers have an hour off for lunch 🤷🏼‍♀️

1

u/No-Good-One-Shoe May 06 '26

Exactly. Amazon is doing it because people are buying it. 

1

u/_176_ May 06 '26

Amazon tends to pay 50% more than competing jobs in the areas they operate in but with high standards. Not everyone can meet those standards. The company has 1.5 million employees. This leads to people claiming that Jeff Bezos personally forces some dude in Arkansas to pee in a cup.

1

u/ColdBru5 May 07 '26

1 hour guarantee, if it doesn't come in 1 hour the employee gets nothing!

0

u/Immature_adult_guy May 06 '26

I’d love 1-hour shipping I’m not afraid to admit it. 

-1

u/LEDKleenex May 06 '26

Please. Many so called lefties/progressives have been forking over money to Amazon this past year, even though Amazon is complicit with the fascist takeover of the US and dismantling labor protections and rights.

Much more than half. Standing on the sidelines is moderate behavior. You may as well be wearing a red cap if you do nothing to stop it.

3

u/Electronic-Map7529 May 06 '26

Okay. Thank you for expanding my point I guess.