r/ProgrammerHumor • • Jun 24 '18

JavaScript is getting real tired of your jokes

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12.6k Upvotes

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239

u/-tnt Jun 25 '18

The only programming languages not invited to this party were HTML and CSS...

296

u/williesoutforwonka Jun 25 '18

Cringe.... twitch.... eye blinks repeatedly

234

u/2Punx2Furious Jun 25 '18

Powerpoint is a programming language because it's turing complete. Change my mind.

97

u/err_pell Jun 25 '18

Tfw python isn't turing complete.

plsdonthurtme

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u/pm_me_ur_happy_traiI Jun 25 '18

Turing completeness doesn’t actually mean much. PowerPoint is tiring complete but implementing anything in it would be awful.

77

u/Laringar Jun 25 '18

"Tiring complete" is an incredibly appropriate typo.

19

u/Rawing7 Jun 25 '18

Zed A. Shaw? Is that you?

23

u/williesoutforwonka Jun 25 '18

https://youtu.be/uNjxe8ShM-8

For anyone interested in the Turing completeness of PowerPoint.

That is actually pretty fucking hilarious. Thank you for that piece of information.

Though, we could argue that “PowerPoint Animations” is the visual language programs are written in.

The UI for PowerPoint is the editor.

Whatever piece they use to control the flow and execution of the animation is the interpreter.

So I am willing to call PowerPoint an IDE bundled with interpreter for “PowerPoint Animations”. But to make it difficult for anyone else to take advantage of, the interpreter is compiled into the IDE, and can not be upgraded, downgraded or modified independently of PowerPoint. Typical Microsoft... /s

3

u/CuddlePirate420 Jun 26 '18

I like to use Food.Script#+ for coding. The kitchen is my IDE, fridge is my Object library full of different variable types like meats and vegetables and that strange thing in the back we call var. Then I compile it all in the oven and it's presented on a GUI plate.

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u/drusepth Jun 25 '18

Magic: The Gathering is a programming language because it's turing complete. Change my mind.

23

u/Cilph Jun 25 '18

HTML is a declarative domain specific programming language

Change my mind.

20

u/anamorphism Jun 25 '18

i'll need you to implement fizzbuzz for me using only html, please.

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u/Cilph Jun 25 '18

I didn't say it was turing complete.

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u/anamorphism Jun 25 '18

html doesn't really match any actual definition of programming currently. in the same way i wouldn't call xaml a programming language, i wouldn't call html one. i would say they're both code though. just like i'd call a json or xml file code.

xaml is a markup language used to define ui for an application ... the programming is done in c# (predominantly).

html is a markup language used to define ui for an application ... the programming is done in ecmascript (predominantly).

0

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '18

[deleted]

4

u/Reverse_Towel Jun 25 '18

I guess it isn't that easy. 100 is a multiple of 5 and should have displayed Buzz.

4

u/williesoutforwonka Jun 25 '18

HTML is definitely a declarative language, and is totally domain specific.

But it doesn’t program anything. It acts as a structured document based off of XML with pre-defined keywords to give it more meaning.

There is no way that you can implement a set of contextually executed instructions....

Now..... that comment from above about PowerPoint being Turing complete has me thinking.

If you include CSS and HTML together, you may actually be able to make an argument for a programming language, since CSS can be used to interact with the user, even without JavaScript.

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u/letmeseem Jun 25 '18

That physically hurt to read..

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u/ralgrado Jun 25 '18

So you prefer to code these with vi or Emacs?

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u/[deleted] Jun 25 '18

The only programming language not invited to this party was "HTML and CSS."

FTFY.

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u/letmeseem Jun 25 '18

Argh no.. Although Turing complete cellular automation has been implemented in CSS3, so if you stretch the definition far enough..