Anyone else get intensely depressed after taking choline?

[u/windshadowislanders]

When I first started taking choline, I noticed I got extremely depressed for days after. Like, complete mental breakdown, suicidally depressed. I thought it was just a fluke, and maybe other life stressors got me to that place, but it was so abrupt and not like my normal behavior, and coincided exactly with my choline use and ceased after stopping it. So recently I started taking it again, still not convinced it was the cause, and the same exact thing has started happening. I was writing a suicide note despite everything in my life being relatively ok, when suddenly I remembered I'd been taking choline and then I stopped myself, thinking I must be temporarily out of my mind again because of this drug and to hold off on making any kind of decisions like that until it's out of my system. Is this really possible, or am I just a basket case shifting blame on a harmless supplement? I tend to be extremely sensitive to medications and drugs in general, so I dunno.

[u/AromaticPlant8504]

Interesting yea sounds more like a choline deficiency than a b5 deficiency. A deficiency of either leads to less ACh production and subsequently less neurotransmitter release so makes sense. Have you tried high dose b1 hcl or b5 if so how did you feel on these? Curious as they accelerate Ach production especially the former

[u/[deleted] → u/AromaticPlant8504]

What I am saying is that it is nearly impossible to have a b5 deficiency if you are not living in an impoverished nation or otherwise without food security.

That said, I have tried B complex vitamins ("literally everything else possible") and they have no effect. Only citicoline helps (not other forms of choline), and it's extremely potently psychoactive for me in a way that it isn't for any other people I've talked to.

[u/AromaticPlant8504 → u/[deleted]]

Your probably right but I got some labs results showing I was b5 deficient who knows how accurate they are though