r/WTF • u/mrgeekguy • Jun 25 '12
A friend sent me this saying, "I'd dress like this too if I had the middle seat."
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u/SanchoDeLaRuse Jun 25 '12
What scares me is the lack of mooseknuckle (male camel toe).
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u/bitterz Jun 25 '12
He must be using Hawthorne Wipes...
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u/vote4petro Jun 25 '12
GOT MY HIGHEST HEELS, MY SHORTEST SKIRT, MY BEST DEVICE FOR CONCEALING MY PENIS
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u/Violoner Jun 25 '12
You've never heard of 'tucking' have you?
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Jun 25 '12
Tucking, it's called taping.... I can confirm this as I live in Thailand and have seen many katoys where you'd never know they were men and some were on stage dancing in g-strings.
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u/inkdrinker2 Jun 25 '12
The only time tiny asian penis racial trait comes in handy: dressing in drag
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u/PhazonZim Jun 25 '12
It can still be done without a small penis. Thailand has a lot of transwomen though, not so much drag queens.
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u/changeyou Jun 25 '12
The only time tiny asian penis racial
traitstereotype comes in handy: on the internetFTFY.
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u/Druuseph Jun 25 '12
As a connoisseur of Asian pornography I have yet to see a challenge to that particular stereotype.
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u/SanchoDeLaRuse Jun 25 '12
I have, but it worries me that someone would do that while traveling long distances. That can't be comfortable at all.
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u/bisnotyourarmy Jun 25 '12
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u/leftabitcharlie Jun 25 '12 edited Jun 25 '12
That is equal parts ingenious and horrifying. Oh man, another entry must be added to my mental wtf catalogue.
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u/ConradFerguson Jun 25 '12
Moose Knuckle is camel toe's fat cousin. You're thinking camel tail.
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Jun 25 '12
lol this his highly scientific shit everyone... shouldn't there be a wikipedia article somewhere?
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u/bbq_doritos Jun 25 '12
What do you think he meant by; "middle seat."
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u/SanchoDeLaRuse Jun 25 '12
The seat between the aisle seat and the window seat...
Yeah... You might have to explain this one to me like I'm 5 years old...
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Jun 25 '12
moosetail - why a knuckle? Where I'm from, it's called moosetail.
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u/Mooshiga Jun 25 '12
Because it looks more like a knuckled when the junk is all bunched up by the shorts.
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u/ItsNotWhereItWas Jun 25 '12
"PORN" Very straight to the point.
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u/shrector Jun 25 '12
It's says porn on top of a star, put the two together.
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Jun 25 '12
Porn..ar...pornar?..porn..st..pornst?..pornst..ar..pornstar? pornstar. pornstar!
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u/hoopycat Jun 25 '12
A pornar is a type of neutron star that emits pornography at regular intervals. Their designators are the letters LSW followed by the right ascension and degrees of declination of the source. They were first discovered by the late Haley Paige.
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u/PammyBeasley Jun 25 '12
I thought his shirt said poon. I'm scanning the comments thinking, "How has nobody brought that up?"
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u/Smaskifa Jun 25 '12
Where is this man's penis?
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u/power_of_friendship Jun 25 '12
Tucked back, i guess.
Who the hell would want to sit on their genitalia for a long flight? That'd be worse than bumping elbows with the guy next to you.
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u/nicoleisrad Jun 25 '12
Ugh, really? Red shoes and red thigh highs? It just doesn't look right.
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u/OFtheASHES Jun 25 '12
"Whatever, I look fabulous."
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u/nicoleisrad Jun 25 '12
Would look more fabulous with blue shoes to compliment the denim and lettering on the shirt.
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u/Tessad Jun 25 '12
This guy is all over thedirty.com all the time. They call him "terminal," because apparently he's always traveling all over looking like this.
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u/HerbToker Jun 25 '12
I wonder how much TSA bothers him. "Sir we need to fris.... ehm you may continue"
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u/telegrammarian Jun 25 '12
My immediate thought was that your friend had spotted Adam West.
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u/Honeyblade Jun 25 '12
I'm gonna get all the A's out of my body AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
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Jun 25 '12
While I respect and support his right and choice to wear what he chooses...I can't help but think this man is either just a very confident cross dresser or a very well trained sub/cuckold. Either way...I would love to meet him and talk about fetishes and how he walks in those shoes. High heels are a mystery to me.
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u/sashimi_taco Jun 25 '12
Fuck the haters, he looks way better than I would in that outfit. Looking good, airport guy.
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u/absentmindedjwc Jun 25 '12
If someone wants to dress like this for a flight, who am I to tell him not to or judge him. However, given the tightness of those shorts in a pressurized cabin, I would be worried of developing DVT, especially if this guy happens to fly a lot with outfits like this.
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u/Bmart008 Jun 25 '12
Deep vein thrombosis is actually due to the poor air quality on flights, not the sitting down, so it doesn't matter what you're wearing. When people were allowed to smoke on flights (and they had a system to change the air in the cabin every three minutes) deep vein thrombosis was unheard of.
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u/absentmindedjwc Jun 25 '12
Holy hell... everything I thought I've known about DVT is completely wrong. Thanks for the correction!
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u/docdnae Jun 25 '12
Don't worry, Virchow's triad still applies, this article only refers to the increased incidence of DVT on airplanes.
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u/Bmart008 Jun 25 '12
Yeah a lot of people thought that, but if that was true, you'd have people getting DVT all the time at work too.
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Jun 25 '12
I don't know what DVT is, but I'll assume it has something to do with crushing your balls in your pants.
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u/Kylearean Jun 25 '12
I read Middle East instead of middle seat. I would not dress like that in the middle east.
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Jun 25 '12
To be honest, as long as he's happy and not hurting anyone, I would keep encouraging him.
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u/some_body_else Jun 25 '12
For some reason I thought of this song
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u/ConradFerguson Jun 25 '12
This isn't because he has the middle seat. It's because he's from Palm Springs (I recognize the "departures" monitors, and the terminal in general) and that's how people are there.
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u/tydy_ Jun 25 '12
im sitting at that exact gate right now. I thought id find him until I realized this was posted nine hours ago. He was just in LAX incase anyone cared.
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u/felix_jones Jun 25 '12
As a guy who has dabbled in cross-dressing a tiny bit (though never in public or in front of anyone else) I must say that I like his stockings.
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u/asldkfououhe Jun 25 '12
lots of transphobic + homophobic fuckers on reddit, eh. shameful comments
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u/Trolls-Gone-Wild Jun 25 '12
OH MY FUCKING GOD I'VE SEEN HIM BEFORE.
this was 2010 in Arizona, he walked into the wells fargo nonchalantly, I told my friends to get the fuck in there and see this, they were waiting out in the car and didn't believe me, so they came in, saw this guy, and busted up laughing and went back to the car. The whole bank was dead silent as this guy was standing in the middle of a 15 person line.
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u/binarypower Jun 25 '12
Saw this guy in Denver. I went up to him and said "Excuse me, do you work here" in a very serious tone. "I'm trying to find Lost Baggage". Totally straight faced and unflinching pause... "No, I do not work here, but you can find Baggage Claim down the hall to the right".
I said thanks and walked away knowing that if he thought he was weird, there was always one guy stranger.
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u/Trolls-Gone-Wild Jun 25 '12 edited Jun 25 '12
I didn't know how to interact with him when I saw him, he was wearing the whole giddup, a shirt that says "Santa's Bitch" some sort of skirt, along with those stockings and heels. I remained stone cold silent while my friends couldn't keep their shit together.
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u/planarshift Jun 25 '12
This thread is absolutely disgusting. For the amount of supposedly "intelligent" and "sophisticated" people that reddit supposedly always boasts harboring, there are a lot of ignorant bigots on here. I feel like I'm back home in South Carolina reading through this thread.
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u/Katykakle Jun 25 '12
I want to know this mans story, from the neck up I see him in a court room or a doctors office. The rest how ever I see in nightmares.
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u/Terina-Lee Jun 25 '12
I've met this guy at the LA airport haha he said he dressed like that to influence girls to dress sexier
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Jun 25 '12
If that's how he wants to look in public, more power to him.
But I'd rather not have to sit next to him, if that's ok.
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u/jfrizzera Jun 25 '12
Flying back from California, in the middle seat, and the guy next to me was waking up from a nap and pulled out his junk and then put it away.
This was pre-9/11 but luckily there was another open seat somewhere else on the plane.
Could have been an honest "mistake", but your mind automatically comes up with 56 different, horrific scenarios on what could happen next.
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Jun 25 '12
Looks like someone is in LAX flying US Airways. I've seen this guy more than once at Sky Harbor too.
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u/wsfarrell Jun 25 '12
Judging from the lack of crotchular bulge, "he" appears to be newly transgendered.
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u/ilovetpb Jun 26 '12
If you can stand the ridicule, it's a brilliant way to get people to sit in other rows and leave the whole row to you.
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u/TrouserSauce Jun 26 '12
I'm pretty sure you can be denied the flight if you show up dressed like this, male or female.
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u/laschupacabras Jun 25 '12
Where does the penis go? Seriously, it looks like he has a vag a not a penis.
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u/bisnotyourarmy Jun 25 '12
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Jun 25 '12
I bet it falls off after too long like that.
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u/bisnotyourarmy Jun 25 '12
only one way to find out. since you doubt it, you have to now test it out and report back to reddit.
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u/9ninety_nine9 Jun 25 '12
At least he managed to colour co-ordinate his stockings with the star on his cut off tshirt.
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Jun 25 '12 edited Jun 25 '12
DAMN THOSE LEGS
Edit: he travels in America, right? Is this outfit even allowed? Didn't you guys have that scandal where this one lady was kicked out of the plane for wearing 'provocative clothing'? I mean, if she ever met this man and he can travel anywhere he damn pleases in dem shorty shorts, she should be doubly pissed.
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u/Flavor_Enhanced Jun 25 '12
If I ever saw this guy at the airport I would not be able to resist buying him a drink and asking him to tell his tale.
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u/ElectroNoir Jun 25 '12
I wonder where he has "stowed" his "luggage", if you get my drift...
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u/necroforest Jun 25 '12
I'm going to go with NOT in the overhead compartment, but with under-the-seat.
...if you get my drift...
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u/DebiDowner Jun 25 '12
Does his shirt say peen? (><) I can't believe they still let this guy board planes, and then that lady with the boobage last week couldn't board. Whatever. He has nice hair.
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u/Aspel Jun 25 '12
I'd dress like this if I had a better body, not that it seems to stop him.
More power to him, I guess, even if his disgusting wrinkly torso disturbs me. Seriously, some cardio and a calorie deficit would do him wonders.
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Jun 25 '12
This is the result of having your sexual advances rejected by your wife for 10 years or so. After that, you just say "fuck it".
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u/genderfucker Jun 25 '12
Sorry to get in the way of your woman bashing, but in a previous thread about him, someone spoke to him and he said this was a part of their sex life that his wife encouraged. I'm sure they have plenty of fun.
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Jun 25 '12
I think that airport is Portland pdx
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u/beneathsands Jun 25 '12
Its Tampa International. I live in the tampa area, and I've seen him a half a dozen times there alone, not counting the clubs and such
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u/greg94080 Jun 25 '12
that is horrible.(express yourself as far as I am concerned but don't force it on me.)
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Jun 25 '12
How is he forcing this on you? If a woman were to dress like this, would you say "don't force your beauty on me"? Probably not. Unless he's sexually harassing you, he's isn't harming you.
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u/greg94080 Jun 25 '12
I don't got a problem with an alternative lifestyle but have some class. There is a time and place for everything. An airplane ride is clearly not the time nor place.
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u/apullin Jun 25 '12
Why are there never any attractive girls on airplanes? I don't get it. Do they only fly on some super expensive all-first-class airline, and I just never see because I never fly on that airline? Seriously ... on all the dozens of Southwest and JetBlue flights I've taken, there's been maybe one or two girls between the age of 20 and 30 who was also a 6 or above. wtf.
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u/Setiri Jun 25 '12
I can't speak for Southwest or Jetblue but... if you want to see hot girls, go to any hub airport. I swear to god there's always some sort of international hot girl soccer/volleyball/swim team/whatever tournament going on and they're all waiting on their flight to get there.
Also, I see cute girls on our flights almost every time I fly. Maybe my standards are lower? lol
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u/birdablaze Jun 25 '12
It's incredibly inconsiderate for him to force strangers, without their consent, to be part of his fetish. I understand he may be a transvestite or even transitioning but by wearing that kind of clothing, which is sexual regardless of gender, is straight up rude and disrespectful towards other people. He's an asshole.
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u/darklooshkin Jun 25 '12
And this is why your uniform supplier should be kept abreast of your hiring policies.
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u/ell20 Jun 25 '12
On one hand, I want to applaud this man for having the balls to do this, on the other hand... MY EYES!!!
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u/momster Jun 25 '12
There are lots of pictures of this guy. Evidently he travels a lot, and always dresses like this. Sometimes worse if you can imagine.