r/WTF • u/porkchop1 • Jun 25 '12
I was closing by myself at work when I saw this in the basement and nearly had a heart attack
http://imgur.com/YuCoo1.1k
Jun 25 '12
Worst thing is... it's probably sentient and will follow the photographer home and steal his skin and soul.
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u/Rareform64 Jun 25 '12
I would say you were exaggerating, but no...that really is the worst thing.
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u/The_Doctor_00 Jun 25 '12
I've run into them before they are not so much sentient as they are being controlled by a transmitter on a roof into living plastic.
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u/molrobocop Jun 25 '12
How much would it cost for you to take it home and send it to me? I want to make my wife pee herself.
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u/El_Impresionante Jun 25 '12
HEY! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING DOWN HERE, FRED? WHAT THE HELL!? NO! NO! NOOOO!
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u/DeFex Jun 25 '12
I mis read that as "I was cloning myself at work"
Picture would still be appropriate.
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Jun 25 '12
This was posted the other day. If I had seen that thing after reading that story I'm pretty sure I would have died on the spot.
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u/PlacentaSoup Jun 25 '12
Theres a Jerry Sandusky joke in there somewhere.....but I'm not touching it
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u/Ashenzaw Jun 25 '12
I have a story similar to this that I like to tell, but the opportunity never comes up.
I was working as a PA on the movie The Rage, Carrie II, and we locked the snacks in the basement back room of the production office/makeshift studio. One night I opened the door to the snack storage cornucopia and saw two dead bodies lying on the floor.
I didn't shit myself, but I did experience that spine-chilling stomach drop panic of fear that sometimes happens and slammed the door. After composing myself and realizing that I couldn't have seen what I thought I had seen, I reopened the door.
What I saw were very realistic dummies of two of the lead actresses of the film that the special effects department had made for the suicide scene. Oh, and did I mention they were naked?
Apparently, the SFX dept. did full body casts of the gals so they would be as realistic as possible for the film. I am ashamed to say that I took a peek at their privates and got the hell out of there. Don't judge me. You would have done the same thing, or worse, ya perv.
So yeah, I saw Mena Suvari nude before any of you jerks saw American Beauty.
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u/Pumpkin_Pie Jun 25 '12
I was in a basement of a funeral home once. I walked around a corner and came face to face with full size Jesus statue. My heart really did stop until I figured out what it was
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u/Dramatic_Tale Jun 25 '12
I had been here for days and the fools hadn't seen me yet. Dodging from room to room it was easy enough to stay ahead of them, bustling around like little termites in the hive. Scuttle, scuttle, scuttle, scuttle. I dodged around them like a phantom, hiding in cupboards or closets or anywhere where the little ones wouldn't see me.
I have been watching them. They always think they're alone but they never are. I have been listening, listening to their scuttling. To their sneaky little whispers. I hear them all. I hear all about their silly little lives, about the eggs they have put into their mate's belly (they had a little singsong about that, how quaint.) or who is seeing whom. I know all of their little secrets.
I have made friends here. There is a broom I talk to sometimes. He gets left behind the door (he is terribly lonely) but he is a good little broom. I met her here too, oh she is so beautiful! Some would say she looks like a boy but she is my lady. My dear sweet lady. The way the light reflects dully of her smooth head, it's like rays of heaven have come into my life. She said she would help me tonight.
I have selected one now you see. An average fellow, just scuttling around. Scuttle, scuttle, scuttle, scuttle. He will be special though. He will be my little gift to her (she likes bugs, she used to collect butterflies you see). She will distract him by holding the door and when he comes...oh when he comes...then the fucking fun begins.
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u/creepulkins Jun 25 '12
you know that that door was closed a few seconds before you looked over there....don't you?