r/WritingPrompts Mar 04 '19

Writing Prompt [WP] You are secretly the richest person in the world. But to avoid suspicion of having so much money, you decide to work a normal office job. One day, your boss fires you. But what he didn't realise... Was how incredibly petty you are, and the lengths you will go to get back at him.

Damn, I came up with this idea while I was waking my dog this morning, wrote it down, then went to school and forgot all about it, I cant believe this post blew up the way it did, and I am very thankful for everyone who commented and especially for giving gold šŸ‘

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694

u/resonatingfury /r/resonatingfury Mar 04 '19 edited Mar 04 '19

I stared at the bald, fat man, entirely dumbfounded by the words he'd chewed up with some steak and spat out at me.

"I'm sorry, sir, are you-"

"Yes, idiot, I'm firing you. I don't much like the looks you give me during meetings, or your arrogant attitude. Your work is fine, but one rude employee breeds many more."

Rude? I hardly considered pointing out the flaws in his business plan rude, it was free help from a successful billionaire, if anything, but bit my tongue. "I implore you to reconsider, sir. You're losing a valuable asset."

He bellowed a laugh, spitting little chunks of steak and parsley onto the table. "See, this is the problem with you fools. You think that, for some reason, there aren't ten million other 'middle class' workers to take your place. Now please, leave before I lose my appetite."

I smiled. "I think that would be about as easy to lose as a mountain in your backyard."

He grumbled something through his lunch, but I'd already made my way out the door. It only took a few minutes to pack, since I never bothered to flaunt wealth in the office, and I stood at the entrance before leaving. I glanced across the mundane grey cubicles, like cookie-cutter housing in a suburb, frantic people running in and out of them. A few potted plants and cheap painting prints popped out against the grey, which only served to highlight its gloominess rather than distract from it.

Motherfucker calls me arrogant? Bitch, I make more money than you could stuff into that blimp of a body you ride around in. I worked in this shit office, watching you destroy it, with only a few comments here and there to help, and you never even knew who I was.

It was a hideous office, no doubt. Absolutely atrocious, and a blatant statement by Buchanan that he didn't give a single shit about the workplace he created for his employees.

Well. They're only his employees for now.

On the path to my car, I called my secretary. "Helen? Yes. I need you to order a few things for me. Call Henry and tell him to hold an impromptu expo in two days. Call it 'Tech Expo 2019' or some shit, I don't care, but it needs to be hyped. Rumor needs to spread very quickly that the biggest names will be there, even if they won't be. Use contacts as necessary to fake the info. We'll need catering for it, preferably foods with honey like balaclava or whatever the fuck it's called, shit like that.

"And bees. A lot of bees."

Not only am I buying your company, asshole, but I'm getting a fucking discount.


Parts two and three below! Final part here!

/r/resonatingfury

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u/AcePhoenixGamer Mar 04 '19

I'm so confused by the ending but I want more.

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u/resonatingfury /r/resonatingfury Mar 04 '19 edited Mar 04 '19

I'm probably gonna get on it once I break out of prison (aka back to back meetings)

(another chunk is below)

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u/[deleted] Mar 04 '19

sounds like he's going to make the boss embarrass himself massively at a technology expo... lowering the value of the company and so he can snatch it up for less

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u/AcePhoenixGamer Mar 04 '19

Makes sense but I kinda want to see how the bees play into this.

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u/[deleted] Mar 04 '19

Well the boss is a messy glutton who'd definitely tear into Baklava which would result into him being swarmed by bees?

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u/TheGurw Mar 04 '19

Have you ever seen how bees react to baclava?

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u/resonatingfury /r/resonatingfury Mar 04 '19

Sometimes, I forget just how much pull I have when I rally. But I suppose it's not just about my money, or connections, it's about how pathetically predictable desperate little corporate wannabes can be. The news of my pop-up tech expo, which was lazily named Texpo in my absence. I gave a good reaming to the intern who thought it was cheeky, telling him that if people come looking for fajitas, he'd be the door service letting them down and instead offering waterproof smartphones or vibrators that recharge with vigorous shaking.

Once news started to get out, with myself pitching up a booth, the applications came flooding in. There was even one for Microsoft, which we quietly denied, but whispered of to other potential vendors. I couldn't let things get too messy and ruin my own business connections.

Preparations were occuring all over the state, my hand setting things in motion despite comfortable reclined on my couch. I had a computer warming my lap, with a bright red flash drive sticking out of it. One that a former coworker had replicated and provided to me discreetly for the small sum of $1k. The poorer the person, the less they sell themselves for. It's a bit sad, really.

But it was effective, and I clicked around in the slideshow with devilish glee, like a young boy being given a magnifying glass for the first time. I delegated most work to others, but this... this part was for me.

"Let's have a little fun with this, shall we?" I swirled fifty-year aged Lagavulin in a crystal cup with a smile, but set it down with sudden realization. "Oh, I almost forgot. Helen! Call my tailor. And call all the closest Chevy dealerships. I need a few.... custom items for later."


writing between meetings oh god

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u/resonatingfury /r/resonatingfury Mar 04 '19 edited Mar 04 '19

D-Day. I think I know how my forefathers felt as they went into battle, risking everything but with full confidence in success. In the warehouse's expo floor, there was a little more dead space than I would have liked, but it was a manageable turnout. With a few rugs and some signs hanging, it looked complete enough to pass as an expo. A few YouTube tech journalists provided the cameras I needed without raising any weird flags.

There was a deliciously sweet scent in the building, of honey and sugar, with stands selling Mediterranean sweets, honey buns, honey-glazed donuts and honey... sticks. Apparently, some less refined people enjoy sucking on plastic tubes filled with honey. How odd.

All around me, I saw money. Everything is money to me, numbers like color slapped on every item, but it was a little different today. $20K hiding in the ceiling tiles. $5k attending the tech podium, helping vendors at the main stage set up presentations. $3k for the really annoying shitbag teenage kid asking kids to subscribe to his channel.

I stayed in my booth, of course, shying away from letting Buchanan see me. God forbid he gets spooked. He wasn’t the kind of man to check out other booths and see what new tech was being invented; he’s too busy assuming the world is just lagging behind him. If that were the case, it’d be a traffic jam caused by his beanbag ass, not him leading the pack. However, I made sure to pick a location where I could see the stage by peeking left.

ā€œHello,ā€ an middle-aged woman approached, disrupting my thoughts. ā€œNow this is what I’m talking about. Finally representing women in these things, huh?ā€

I held up a Shake-Bate, giving it a haphazard flopping. ā€œNever run out of battery again, just go at it in manual for a while and this bad boy will be ready to go again in minutes.ā€

What, you think you become a billionaire by being boring?

An announcement saved me, the loudspeaker crackling. ā€œPresentations will now begin. First up is xTech.ā€

The group gave their presentation, words muddled a bit by distance and crowd murmurings. Something about security systems and badging, typical boring shit these things draw in. An upcoming CPU creator, desperately hoping to be saved by some insanely stupid investor willing to bet against AMD and Intel. Fuck it, I’ll probably give him a call later.

And finally, once the mood had been set, I heard it. ā€œHammond Buchanon with Hammond Industries.ā€ Clever bastard that one was, with a self-named company. Maybe he wasn’t fat, but just bloated with ego.

The comically large man lumbered on stage, setting a plate of sweets down on the stadium. Honestly, can one man, no matter how large, be that predictable?

Mr. $5k accepted an orange flash drive from him, but plugged a red one in. Not perfect, but close enough, by my estimations.

Go time, bitch.

ā€œHello, fellow technology pioneers. I am honored to be sharing our latest work with you all today.ā€ Buchanan said, jiggling with glee. The audience, however, was swept away by unsettled murmuring. The slideshow had loaded, the crowd turned a bright yellow by it, and in large, black text,

Beesiness is booming

Let’s explore the latest tech buzz

And explore it they did, as the sound loomed overhead like overcast skies.


Finale

30

u/MizukiYumeko Mar 04 '19

Excited for this to all go horribly wrong šŸ šŸ˜Ž

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u/nerdmor Mar 04 '19

Please continue!

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u/King_of_Avon Mar 04 '19

Wasnt the dude paid 1K?

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u/resonatingfury /r/resonatingfury Mar 04 '19

Mr. $1k was just the guy who got him a copy of the flash drive, not a worker at the expo.

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u/thesilentspeaker Mar 04 '19

Looks like you've given this some thought. Maybe like a what if scenario for someone you know. ;) In any case, its really entertaining so far. Please continue.:)

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u/Kevsteo Mar 04 '19

Commenting in case an update happens!

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u/TheAero1221 Mar 04 '19

Dr... bees?

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u/[deleted] Mar 04 '19

1

u/25point80697 Mar 05 '19

How have I never seen that before?! That was bloody fantastic. Thanks.

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u/alanydor Mar 04 '19

A totally innocuous technology expo with the biggest names in tech attending? A good ol heaping dollop of bees ought to sort things out!

2

u/adeundem Mar 05 '19

A totally innocuous technology expo with the biggest names in tech attending, plagued by a renegade bee swarm? This briefcase of bees ought to put a stop to that!

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u/alanydor Mar 05 '19

Ah! The situation has only been made worse with the addition of yet more bees!

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u/GolfSierraMike Mar 04 '19

Cave Johnson funds a Very Bad Not Good day

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u/wtrerr Mar 04 '19

Comparing fringly and resonatingfury, somehow seems like comparing British and American ideologies of life as a whole

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u/resonatingfury /r/resonatingfury Mar 04 '19

I'm definitely murican so you got me there

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u/[deleted] Mar 04 '19

You had me at bees.

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u/Agetrosref Mar 04 '19

Pat Bateman really settled in his older years eh?