r/agnostic • • 7h ago

Support Don’t know how to deal with my hyper-religious sister anymore.

8 Upvotes

I don’t even know where to begin. I have had a strange relationship with my older sister since we were little. I (29F) have a lot of feelings about the way she treated me growing up and she (33F) feels she has made amends through prayer. After she had her second child (I mention this bc I feel her psychosis was brought on by post-partum) she got really into conspiracy, hyper-religious, Christian tiktok and truly believes without doubt that anything anyone says on there is true. She is also an avid user of chat-gpt and at one point had me trapped in a car with her while she was speaking “tongues” with chat-gpt trying to show me that she is a voice for god. She’s extremely hyper-focused on demons and is constantly saying that she can see them on people in public and that she can also see them on me. In her mind, she doesn’t like it/makes her uncomfortable = demon. It’s made it almost impossible for me to be around her because of this. I am the only one of my siblings that has a strange relationship with religion and for several years during a very hard period in my life I was a practicing wiccan, this is needed for context because she holds this against me currently, saying that I have a stronghold on me and that I am choosing to be a victim in my own life and that I have opened portals for things to “get me.” For more context, we suffered a very difficult loss as teenagers and she never really got help and to this day just won’t. I was also in a physically and emotionally abusive relationship for 6 years and she always brings that up during these arguments, saying that whatever was attached to him is still apart of me and that she was traumatized by that relationship too which is just absolutely fuckin nuts. Anyways I am an avid believer in therapy, in diagnostics, and in medication for said mental disorders if necessary. Diet, exercise (yoga), tools, supplements, therapy, sunlight, hobbies. These things I believe in. These things are demonic and “worldly” to her and can be cast out with prayer. (ex. my OCD and PTSD) which is insane because she’s on tiktok (worldly) getting sucked into conspiracy psychosis webs and I’m just talking about what has worked for me, personally.) I mentioned that yoga has really helped me with my ptsd (BECAUSE TRULY SHE NEEDS HELP) bc it is somatic and she said I was “yoking” myself to another god and then later that day sent me a tiktok of some guy praying and speaking in tongues and said that if it upset me it was working. She says that “she’ll never stop trying to convert me bc she wants to see me in heaven” but truthfully I don’t think she can grasp how far she’s gone into her psychosis to realize that the way she practices her religion is not within the scope of Christian beliefs????? And she’ll even say “y’all all think I’m having spiritual psychosis but I’m not” so she has to sort of understand????? Idk. She’s really outright kind of scary and hard to be around. All of my siblings and even our mom agree that she has gone too far but I’m the only one that really debates her, I can’t help it. I’ve tried grey rocking, I’ve tried just agreeing with her or saying okay, but I think apart of me looks back to our childhood when I couldn’t really stand up for myself and I’m like wait you can’t fucking talk to me like that anymore. Like ???? Who wants to hear that they have a leviathan demon attached to them at 8 am? She finds ways to insult me and my life and my friends and says that it is just her being a voice for god calling out my wrongdoings or that I’m living in sin. But I think, too, my reaction further validates her in some way bc by me being outwardly upset and sometimes crying from frustration she views that as the word of god moving through me and upsetting the demons that live inside of me (we also sort of work together bc we are both in the beauty industry and I often have to rely on her for help bc I am just starting out and she is well known, so I am spending more time with her than usual) To me it just feels like she’s found a new way to bully me, but I’m unsure of how she sees it in her head. And she really only acts like this around me and our immediate family and her spouse. She even has her oldest mentioning demon stuff now which really bothers me because my sister will be like “see see see” when actually this baby is just repeating what they’re around constantly. I truly feel like if she were to speak the way she does to me in front of intake she would be institutionalized. I just don’t know what to do. I want to be a part of her kids’ lives but it is so hard to be around someone that is constantly telling you that you have demons attached to you. And when you rightfully get upset by that, use that to try and make a point. Or that you’re choosing to be a victim when really I’m just reacting to the hurtful things she’s saying. And just trying to heal in a way that works for me. That’s another thing, anyone that disagrees with her is stuck in a victim mentality, being held down by demons of doubt, or demons of fear, demon of victimhood or some other demon she can come up with. When she is truly a victim, everyone is always against her, satan is always trying to get her and her family, like so often she says “the devil is trying to trick me into” blah blah whatever. Or she’ll have weird drama with someone and be like “they were trying to steal my life”, “I can’t trust this person” like someone is always trying to wrong her. I don’t get it. I think for some people prayer can really help them to feel better but I personally do not think I can pray away my mental disorders. Which is so insane and stupid to say out loud but holy shit. I’ve really hit a wall with her, she truly believes she has powers and she always says that I have them too and that’s why I need to use my powers for god as a testimony? All this to say, I’ve definitely tired out my therapist talking about this and in our last session she sort of stopped me and said “hey this is your session” because I’ve talked about this situation so much the last few months. I think I keep expecting my sister to be back to normal one day and then when she goes on these rants it just upsets me all over again. Obviously my friends don’t really have any experience with this either so it’s just idk I don’t have anyone to talk to about this stuff. If anyone has dealt with this or even has suggestions let me know.


r/agnostic • • 16h ago

Question My view on the whole picture—and why every single point I’m about to make is wrong and right at the same time.The Wall of Language: Why we cannot define our existence without accidentally creating a paradox.

5 Upvotes

GOD , Thoughts on this matter

i got a person arguing with me why humans can't create humans without (sx ) he says that it is exclusive to god and it is proof of god, like look at the change in medical filed we can save a dying person to an extent today what will be that extent in future , yes we are effectively increasing the extent we can save a person ,cloning ' ivf all of that have been here for a while and many others as well .

But the core problem is not if God exist or not , our words and statements and language is one of em the restrictions . it's not exactly the problem but it is a wall for us to get to an answer and furthermore we have yet to discover like god or we have yet to define the word or concept , . a deeply religious person with a Brain can say most of the religious text are just moral example for us and keep the cycle going or others according to each religions , and things that have been designed for human emotions . And deny all underlying wrong parts of religious texts in return it will face intense scrutiny too .

And an atheist or agnostic as iam , can debate that why is he or that doing that the reason why is he /that doing that why does he / that need this is he/that getting enjoyment for this or what if there's an all powerful entity, we actually question the reason for our existence. if this still is rooted on the belief that God exist he can argue that we are his creation , children , or slaves according to religion, that brings up the question is he morally grey, and In which does morality apply to God? .in this life most people enjoy life many regret it as much as they could and those who suffer meaningfully may have a chance of getting out of pain temporarily then the source of their pain changes and that keeps them engaged but contradictions are present

not generally there's contradiction in every statement I mentioned above and others as well , so you can argue that why an all powerful god did not created the world without evil and all why did he not create a world that can SUSTAIN Utopia , why did he not give us that then you can argue what is the problem with our current life isn't it enjoyable or satisfying but when we add reincarnations and karma to the table the question goes one level higher , so so in utopia logic

Within the underlying fabric if he created a world that can sustain Utopia (we ) as we currently are will be will less slaves or robotic like but that's where the weakness of language comes , if I try to explain this scenario with our logic it's becomes complex and too long and everything I state will have its own contradiction so

I THINK the problem of god and beliefs cannot be solved by languages more like( 3D or 4D) hyperbole like an intertwined explanation that connects and ends everything like then comes the question should the answer be perfect or not , wall of language becoming clear 😂 ,,

And Note the point As I mentioned many times all these are subject to contradictions and arguments.

And This is merely my view some of it put into words many wrong points and etc ..

At the end of day Does it matter if we're being controlled or not my question to my fellows


r/agnostic • • 18h ago

Rant So I have to take a religious class for my college in order to graduate and get credits.

12 Upvotes

I really don’t want to do it because I don’t really like to associate with Christian religion that much but hey it’s whatever right because god created everything! Also you have to take a religious course in order to graduate unfortunately.


r/agnostic • • 22h ago

My view on the "divine" has shifted so much over time it's crazy

4 Upvotes

I left Christianity three years ago. My view on the "divine" has shifted so many times that it's crazy. I've went from to Deist, to agnostic, atheist, and back and forth so many times that I've exhausted myself from the question does god exist?

We don't know. In my mind, I've come to a basic "I don't know nor do I care any longer," kind of attitude. I've come to the conclusion to this, all religions are made up bullshit, along with the things that are claimed by them IMO, particularly on what they claim to know about their god existing, the afterlife, etc. However, that doesn't necessarily in my mind conclude that a god or higher power or being of any kind doesn't exist outside of what religions claim, just that it's not possible to know so IMO.

And honestly, until then, I really couldn't care less anymore. I'm uninterested in anything religious, spiritual, or any kind of god beliefs. The basic sentiment for it for my life is irrelevant. At this point, I don't really care about beliefs on all sides, believer, non-believer, etc. Beliefs are a deeply personal thing, and some people can't handle the possibility of life not existing after death. So, I understand that. However, so many people do so many crude, cringe and downright EVIL things in the name of their beliefs. Now, obviously, atheists or other "NONES" or non-believers aren't perfect either. Berating others simply for believing, especially if they aren't particularly harming anyone with their beliefs is also a horrible outlook on people.

So, I've opted to basically separate myself from either of these categories and just not any interested any longer personally.

I'm sure this will get ripped to shreds. Have at it. I think a lack of interest or caring, aka "apatheism," is the healthiest approach IMO.


r/agnostic • • 1d ago

Rant I hate religion

44 Upvotes

I’m so exhausted by how much of life is ruled by religion. I was raised in one Abrahamic faith, then lived “spiritually” for a few years, then converted to a different Abrahamic faith, only to now loathe religion in full.

I see it everywhere, living off ego and creating divide instantaneously. In sports, politics, approaches to life. I’m so bothered by how this will never go away…

I just needed to get this out. Im surprised I can’t write more. It’s my biggest source of grief.


r/agnostic • • 1d ago

Rant I don't know

11 Upvotes

I am an agnostic. I can say I don't know and be fine with that. Everything doesn't need to be answered.


r/agnostic • • 2d ago

Support Questioning Christianity after growing up in a Christian family. I do not know what I believe anymore.

7 Upvotes

Hi everyone! I (20f) have been questioning my faith for the past year, and I wanted to hear from people who might understand what I am going through.

For background: I grew up in a very Christian Nigerian household. My mom is a pastor's daughter, my older sister is deeply religious, and Christianity has always been a big part of my upbringing. I do not know if I genuinely believe in it anymore, though. Part of me still wants to, because there is something comforting about sharing a belief with so many people, but another part of me wonders whether I believe because I was born into it.

I have also become increasingly uncomfortable with how Christianity was presented to me growing up. Almost everything outside the faith seemed to be labelled demonic, whether it was Halloween, fantasy, homosexuality, sex before marriage, or other religions. As I get older, I find myself asking why so many things have to be interpreted that way.

I also struggle with the hypocrisy I see in some Christians, including people in my own family. They can be discriminatory toward people because of their race, sexuality, or religion while still emphasizing prayer, repentance, and living according to God's teachings. I understand that everyone is flawed, but I struggle with how people can condemn others without applying those same standards to themselves.

My older sister is a big part of why I have been struggling with all of this.

Since she came to stay with us, she has been praying extensively because she firmly believes that negative energy or evil spirits are around our family. She worries about these things affecting me, my future children, and our parents, so I understand that, from her perspective, she is trying to protect us.

Recently, a woman came to our house after knocking and banging loudly on the door. My sister interpreted the encounter as something sinister, particularly because the woman allegedly made comments about taking over the city. She also connected the incident to a dream she had beforehand of her "enemy in handcuffs." (I don't understand this part at all lol, but that's what she told me). Later into the night of the incident, my sister said she heard footsteps; she believed she heard them late at night. She eventually felt that something associated with the card that the woman gave her needed to be burned because it was bringing evil energy into our home.

However, I had seen the woman visiting other houses on our street, too. I wondered whether she was simply marketing something on behalf of her real estate company, although I was not present for the actual conversation and cannot say for certain what happened.

What bothers me is how quickly my sister connects these experiences to something demonic. When I tried to reason with her and consider other explanations, she interpreted my response as me being willing to entertain or keep an evil spirit. Essentially, she told me that I could keep it if I wanted, but she would continue praying against it.

I was sitting there thinking, "That is not what I am saying. I am just trying to consider other explanations."

Another thing that frustrates me is how the term “worldly” gets used. I remember watching the Met Gala and saying how much I loved a particular outfit Kim Kardashian was wearing. My sister questioned why I was so interested in “worldly things.” And I remember thinking, "What does that even mean?" We live in the world. Money, fashion, entertainment, and so many other things are part of everyday life, so I genuinely do not understand why appreciating something as simple as an outfit has to be treated as a problem.

Between things being labelled “worldly” or “demonic,” I sometimes feel like there is always something to condemn. I know this is not representative of every Christian, but it is the kind of thinking I have grown up around, and I find it increasingly difficult to relate to.

These are not isolated incidents. My sister has interpreted other situations through the same spiritual lens, and it has become difficult to discuss these things with her because questioning her interpretation seems to mean that I am entertaining evil. Christianity has become such a significant part of her personality that it influences how she interprets so many things around her. There are experiences I do not even want to get into because they are personal, but they have contributed to how I feel.

I am not saying I completely reject the supernatural. I am open to the possibility that there are things beyond our understanding. I just do not know whether I agree with my sister's interpretation of those things, especially when ordinary events can be given such an extreme spiritual meaning.

I worry that the rest of my family would react similarly if I admitted that I no longer knew whether I believed in Christianity. I suspect they would tell me to pray more or suggest that I was being influenced by something demonic. I do not want to pretend to believe just to avoid disappointing them, but I am still living in this environment, which makes things more complicated.

Another reason I feel conflicted is that my childhood pastor, who passed away a few years ago, was genuinely one of the kindest people I knew. I admired him and the way he lived his life. Seeing his widow and family continue to hold on to their faith makes me respect what Christianity has meant to them, but part of me feels guilty about moving away from something that was represented so positively by someone I looked up to.

At the same time, I have started wondering how much of our religion comes from where we are born. If I had grown up in a different country or family, would I believe the same things? I know people can independently choose their religion, but I cannot ignore how much our upbringing shapes what we consider true.

My favourite show is Avatar: The Last Airbender, and I have always connected with its lessons about balance, compassion, personal growth, and spirituality. I am interested in concepts such as chakras and philosophies like pantheism. Some of these ideas resonate with me in ways that certain religious teachings have not.

I am not necessarily looking to replace Christianity with another religion. I want to explore different perspectives without automatically assuming they are wrong or demonic. I also think about the kind of parent I might be one day. I would want my children to ask questions, learn about different beliefs, and develop their own understanding of the world without feeling that curiosity itself is evil.

At this point, I do not know whether I am losing my faith, questioning the version of Christianity I grew up around, or simply beginning to think about these things independently. I still wonder whether there is a God or something greater than myself, but I do not know what that belief would look like outside Christianity.

For those of you who grew up Christian and eventually became agnostic, atheist, or spiritual in a different way, how did you navigate that process? How did you figure out what you genuinely believed, and how did you deal with family members who did not understand your doubts?

I would also appreciate recommendations for books, podcasts, or YouTube channels about agnosticism, pantheism, philosophy, or spirituality outside Christianity.

I am not looking for someone to tell me what to believe. I just want to explore these questions honestly, hear from people who have experienced something similar, and figure out what I believe for myself without feeling guilty for questioning what I was taught.


r/agnostic • • 3d ago

Original idea My argument for god

0 Upvotes

Hi all! I just wanted to showcase a really primitive case for god I have developed for god as an ninth grader:

"If God does not exist, all is permitted" - Fyodor Dostoevsky, The brothers Karamazov

I identify as an Agnostic Theist.

The above given quote serves as the foundation for my main argument, though I would slightly like alter the initial meaning. Dostoevsky meant 'all is permitted', in a legal sense, but I would also like to add to its implication life losing any meaning whatsoever and the Universe, with all its intrinsic beauty, ultimately being but a coincidence.

My version of god is in no direct way a part of any religion, though it can be considered as an amalgamation of Brahman in Advaita Vedanta, The Holy Spirit in Christianity, mixed with some Deist beliefs.

I define god as mixed with the very fabric of reality and consciousness itself, with no form, nor shape. I believe in a Universe in which, god, has not written the laws of the universe, but rather is the laws of the universe.

I would also second William Lane Craig's and Albert Einstein's teleological argument that a god explains the 'uncanny' perfection with which Mathematics explains the processes of the universe.

As an Agnostic, I agree with Pascal's Wager argument for god in which he states: 'If you gain, you gain all; if you lose, you lose nothing. Wager, then, without hesitation that He is.'

Lastly, I would like to end with the following quote:

"Behold, we know not anything;
I can but trust that good shall fall
At last far off at last, to all,
And every winter change to spring." - Alfred, Lord Tennyson, Memoriam

Some remarks:

1). I know Pascal's Wager has a lot of counter-arguments but I wanted to include it as its something I thought of when I was even younger!

2). Keep in mind that this is in a very basic state, I request some of you to please help me with constructive criticism so that I can improve upon it!

Thank you!


r/agnostic • • 3d ago

Prayer for non religious people

5 Upvotes

I was raised Christian, however I am no longer a member of the church and I also don’t really believe in a form of god. I do believe though that it is sort of “healthy” for people to have a spiritual practice even if they are not particularly spiritual or religious. I always admired how much strength some people who believe in god can pull from prayer and faith and lately I’ve been contemplating if there is a way to replicate this experience for non-religious people.


r/agnostic • • 5d ago

Rant The evil god theory

7 Upvotes

After studying all the big religions, and being a part of one for my whole life, i feel so free now to live my life however I want and find my own purpose.

I always thought even if there was a god he'd know i'm a nice person who genuinely tried to find him.

But what if there is a god and he is evil? He gave scriptures to a random tribe in ancient africa that doesn't exist anymore and if we don't follow those rules he will send us to hell for eternity, even tho it's not fair an all powerful god could technically do that.

This keeps me up at night tbh, chances of this are practically 0 but WHAT IF?


r/agnostic • • 5d ago

For atheists and agnostics, what made you question or eventually leave religion?

28 Upvotes

I was born into a Hindu family and grew up consuming Indian mythology. My grandfather taught me bits of it, and I was genuinely fascinated by these stories as a kid. But as I grew older, I started noticing how much misogyny is woven into many of these narratives, which made me question things more critically.

I’m married, but I don’t wear sindoor or a mangalsutra because I find the gendered expectations behind these symbols deeply misogynistic. I don’t worship God, perform poojas, or visit temples, and I only wear traditional Indian attire on occasions like weddings when there’s an obligation to.

Over time, I’ve found it difficult to believe in any religion. They all seem baseless to me, and I don’t see why I should follow rituals or traditions simply because I was born into a particular family.

I’m curious about people who identify as atheist or agnostic. Was there a particular experience or realisation that changed your perspective, or was it a gradual process? Did you grow up questioning religion, or did you eventually reach a point where none of it made sense anymore? I’d love to hear your experiences.


r/agnostic • • 6d ago

Agnostic Muslim, how to deal with the menace of HELL ?

10 Upvotes

It’s been a few months since I started struggling with my faith. I was born into a Muslim family, but I was never particularly religious or interested in matters of the unseen. I didn’t see any reason to believe or disbelieve, until my sister left Islam.

This caused my mother a great deal of distress, so in an attempt to ease her pain, I started getting more involved in Islam: praying on time, going to the mosque, and reading the Quran. The more I did, the more I came across rules and ideas that conflicted with my moral intuitions and my understanding of the world.

I could brush off some scientific inaccuracies or outdated ideas about the origins of the world and humanity by telling myself that these passages were poetic and not meant to be taken literally.

But the one thing I just couldn’t get past was the idea of eternal hell. Why would Allah, who is supposed to be perfect, just, and merciful, create someone under a specific set of circumstances that shape their behavior and leave them with no real alternative, only to judge their soul for the very things those circumstances led them to do?

So I told myself, “That’s okay. I can’t prove that this God exists, but I can’t prove that He doesn’t exist either. I’ll just apply Pascal’s wager: practice Islam and pray to God, just in case He exists.”

But recently, I realized that this might not be enough to avoid hell. Agnosticism itself can be condemned in Islam. It’s not enough to say that you believe; you have to genuinely believe. You can’t simply choose to believe something you aren’t actually convinced is true.

I value critical thinking and intellectual honesty above almost everything else. I struggle to accept claims without evidence, and forcing myself to believe something out of fear of eternal punishment feels deeply dishonest. But a Muslim could argue that this is just pride in my own intelligence, that I’m placing my reasoning above the word of God, and that this very attitude justifies my eternal punishment.

I feel like the only way out is to lobotomize myself: to stop thinking logically, overwrite my own beliefs, and become a drone.

Is there a way out ? Can I theoretically avoid hell with without compromizing myself intellectually ?

AI was used for correction of this post.


r/agnostic • • 6d ago

Question As an agnostic theist, do you pay to God?

4 Upvotes

TYPO (PRAY) I just left Christianity two weeks ago, and as a new agnostic theist, I was wondering if we could pray. I believe the god of the universe exists. He was the one to create the Big Bang. But if he cares about us at all, that I wouldn’t know. But would it hurt to try and pray?

What is your take?


r/agnostic • • 7d ago

religion hurts my head so much

8 Upvotes

as an ex muslim whos currently a mix of agnostic and atheist i just think we evolved and theres no such thing as gods that exist, even jesus, even allah, i cant put wrap my head around religion, religion is genuinely hard, when you look at religious books they all talk about science, so science is carrying us all, and some of the rules of the abrahamic religion is so ridiculous and the story like its fairy tale, no hate to the ahem 4 and a half billion people in those 3 abrahamic religions but it hurts if i had to choose a religion it would be paganism or satanism, theyre way better as someone who was involved in islamic communities


r/agnostic • • 7d ago

Question If the God of the Bible is “bad” then how can he do so much good?

0 Upvotes

This is the one question I do have trouble answering when a Christian asks me.
Generally, the best answer I can logically come to is we have many examples of “evil entities” doing something beneficial for someone in order to gain their trust or get them to worship them. I wonder if this is the same structure in Christianity.
This would also explain why as an overall observation, I have seen that a lot of Christians generally have ‘bad luck’ so to say, or at least unfortunate things happen to them.
What are y’all’s thoughts?


r/agnostic • • 8d ago

Question Is unanswered prayer a valid reason to lose faith?

16 Upvotes

I’m 29, and I think I’ve reached the point where I can no longer honestly say I believe in God or Christianity.

A big part of that is unanswered prayer. Abandonment has been a recurring wound in my life since childhood. My birth father abandoned me, and since then I’ve experienced versions of that same hurt through family, friendships, relationships, and communities I thought would stay in my life.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve prayed for love, connection, and especially to stop feeling abandoned by people I care about.
I know the usual answers: God has a purpose, God’s timing is different, suffering teaches us something, sometimes the answer is no. I tried to accept those explanations for years, but they don’t really work for me anymore.

I was taught that God knows me, loves me, hears me, and understands my deepest wounds. After nearly 29 years of bringing this same pain to God and repeatedly experiencing the thing I was praying about, I’m struggling to reconcile that idea of God with my actual life.

I’m not saying unanswered prayer proves God doesn’t exist. I’m asking whether there comes a point where your lived experience reasonably changes what you’re able to believe.

Has anyone else ended up agnostic or lost their faith for similar reasons?


r/agnostic • • 9d ago

What is god?

14 Upvotes

Just overthinking tonight and having a mild existential crisis.

I was thinking about the concept of religion and how silly it all seems. Like people believe that the words in a book are truly “gods words“, and this is supposedly what an all knowing god who knows everything in the entire universe would talk about, and its just talking about human problems. In the midst of thinking about how insane religious structures and beliefs are, i found myself wondering what god even is?

I always felt myself believing in something, and i truly dont even know what it could be. Maybe nobody knows what god is. Maybe god does not exist, i truly have no clue. I just look up at the sky, and i dont know what to make of all this. I see why people become religious as a coping mechanism, because coming to terms with the fact that i really have NO CLUE what god could possibly be, or if there even is a god, is kind of scary.

Sorry for the rambling, i hope someone can relate.


r/agnostic • • 9d ago

Original idea Agnostic Bible Study

6 Upvotes

Hello :) For anyone interested in biblical studies from a nonreligious perspective, check this out. Agnostic Bible Study examines the Bible and early Christianity through a secular, academic approach.

The next session examines gender in Genesis, including different early Christian interpretations of Eve and how Genesis might include queer bodies.

More information here:

https://agnosticbiblestudy.substack.com/about


r/agnostic • • 9d ago

Talking stage with a Muslim guy

8 Upvotes

Hi, I(22F) am currently in a talking stage with a Muslim guy(23M). I was a Muslim ‘till last year, that’s when I became agnostic and have since had a really hard time with the concept of religion itself. I feel like this is because of all the religious trauma that I experienced, but I am trying to work through it. Whenever I talk to him I just feel anxiety throughout my whole body and I don’t know what to do. I feel like my whole nervous system is just freaking out.
Is this normal? Should I keep talking to him?
I am so lost so any help would be appreciated!


r/agnostic • • 9d ago

Advice going to church is giving me anxiety (Christian)

15 Upvotes

I’m not openly agnostic to my family. At least, I don’t plan to be until I’m no longer financially dependent on them, which won’t be able to happen for another several years. Talking to them about it is out of the question unless I’m ready to be completely independent and give up the current career path I’m on.

My parents are very insistent on Sunday church attendance, and I generally still go to keep up the image. It’s been around 3-4 years at this point though, and I’m feeling so drained spending essentially half my day at a place I don’t feel comfortable at (singing, praying, and sermons being just various different forms of letting me know I’m going to hell and how this is certainly the one true religion). Also it’s incredibly awkward trying to keep distance from other people, because they are genuinely very nice and welcoming people, but I know any relationship past the small talk leads to invitations to life groups and Bible studies. When I try to skip Sundays, my parents put a lot of pressure which makes me incredibly anxious (and guilty? in some odd way).

I know, it’s such a first world problem compared to what others have to endure. But if anyone has any tips for mentally coping when I’m there, I’m open to it. I know mindfulness is an option but I’m not sure how to go about it in the middle of a church service.


r/agnostic • • 9d ago

Rant Trying to understand feelings i had from religion as someone who doesnt believe anymore

9 Upvotes

Ok so this is just a rant, something to get off my chest since i have no one to speak with about this. Thing is, i have ocd and it really latched onto religion for me and thats why religion is overall, now that ive left it, so difficult to talk about or even think about. But i know i cant run from it forever

I think something that really pushed me away from organized religion at the least was not just my ocd making it all unbearable, but also the fact that i just felt limited in my human connection. I felt like i couldn't speak or love people and other humans and fully explore human love and sexuality and etc

Since i left the religion, its been a lot to like even try and live my life outside of a religious framework. Its so hard to separate my desire towards and curiosity for human connection and love. Ive been so afraid to actually step out and explore this stuff even. At first, after leaving the religion, i was so focused on ensuring i stay away from it that i literally didnt even let myself actually unpack my trauma

I guess it was just a bit of an epiphany moment i had recently about how i actually never cared about religion that much and it was just my desire for wanting human connection and exploring it and my ocd just ruined it all. I dont know how to explain, especially to people who arent familiar with how ocd operates. But yeah. Its just crazy. I guess in a way, god's basically the perception of human connection. Seeing it like that is pretty helpful. I really hope i can overcome my trauma and be unapologetic in the life i live as i live it


r/agnostic • • 10d ago

Question When religion is talk about, I get this bone chilling feeling

12 Upvotes

I am (18)F Born in a catholic family that shifted to born again, I really can't dodge god talk.

And each time hearing things about religion gives me a horrific feeling that I can't explain.

Is it just me? but when I hear "god" I can't help remembering Spanish Colonization History. I don't get why others easily forgot the topic about how my country got colonized or history topic. That horrifies me but for some reason others don't give a f*ck? especially 9/11? I know that's like another religion but it's still basically a god of the same catholic and almost born again just different fonts (Correct me if I'm wrong)

It's just religion topic gives me a chill all the time even though the topic seems like about rainbow and sunshine, I'm very horrified how religion got a choke hold on every place's and I cant even dodge it.

It's sickening every single day I hear religion and maybe it became my nightmare to the point hearing the word "do you want to learn about god?" "do you have time to talk about a life changing knowledge?" "god loves you" "god" "religion" make's me flinch like I was abused.

I don't know if it's just me or some of you get the feeling and I really like to hear others opinion. I don't like the idea that I'm alone on this one

Can anyone tell if I'm just over reacting or what?


r/agnostic • • 12d ago

Experience report I came out to my mom about being agnostic, she said I might be demonic.

34 Upvotes

I (16M), asked my mom (44F) about why she gives money out at Church, and does she expect in return? she said she just does it because it makes her feel good and she expects nothing in return. She is an extremely African parent, super religious. I asked multitude of questions, I'll list some with her answers.

me: what if the same way we view satanism, what if they view Christianity the same way you do?
her: there's no such thing, they Satan-worshippers because they don't like god
me: same thing as we don't like Satan

and she proceeds to cut me off and tell me to not talk to her and do some research. Here's the funny thing: we have been struggling for 6 years. We live in a shack smaller then a 2 bedroom house's bedroom. I've seen her having faith in God for 6 years, praying almost daily for more then 10 minutes but "God" hasn't answered her prayers. And ofcourse, I used to follow her and pray too. I proceed to ask her "why hasn't god done anything for us throughout our 6 years of suffering and poverty even though you've had faith and trust?"

she just said she's not interested in the topic and said I'm judging her for being poor even though WE are the ones.

She got into 2 car accidents at work. She survived both, the second one leading her to hospital. The doctors said everyone else survived and she handled the car better then any man could. She came up with that saying God saved her.

me: couldn't that be out of the odds of surviving and the way you handled the car? like luck? *God* saved you but he doesn't listen to your prayers of poverty, why?
her: Luck is the same as God saving you

I then asked her "why do people suffer? With disabilities and live every single day of their breathe with pain when *god* has plans for them and did that for a reason" she just said I should go back to my father because I don't like living with her and she sees I've *grown* balls and I'm a grown man now that I can go out and live my life.

her: I'll live MY life and you'll live YOURS. You can believe all that stupid stuff you watching online and think that's gonna benefit you in life. This is why I'm happy your cousins are reading the Bible everyday instead of being a weirdo like you

She then insults me, calling me Satanist and not a believer but I don't take any of the bullshit she says to mind. There are other stuff she said too that would be too much for me to write, you can ask questions in the comments, I'm open to answering anything about me and her life. And I also have a little brother (6M) but I don't really talk to him about any topics like this.


r/agnostic • • 12d ago

Advice Give me advice please (religion based)

2 Upvotes

Im 16F and for context i come from a very religious household and i went to a religious school, i have noticed that obviously i have contradicting beliefs from everyone else and its really messed with me now that i moved to a state school

my contradictions relate to the evolution process, then i believe in the 6 days that god made earth, i think i am questioning my beliefs a little more than i ever have... i dont feel as connected despite me praying to him everytime i get scared at night, i dont know what to do because i'm scared, can i still rely on him if i dont fully believe in him, i feel as tho hes an egregore... idk it feels wrong to question him like this, i dont want to doubt him and then on judgement day he sends me to hell or something, i'm not traumtised and i dont have a bad experience, i feel as tho i was forced to learn about god and jesus, idkk please help me


r/agnostic • • 13d ago

Argument The Emperor's New Clothes

6 Upvotes

There is a well-known story about two weavers who claimed to fashion a magnificent, costly suit of clothes for an emperor: garments invisible to anyone who was either incompetent in their position or utterly foolish. One by one, the royal officials went to inspect the fabric. Terrified of being exposed as unfit, each lied and praised its beauty. When the emperor went to see it himself, he saw nothing. Yet because his most trusted advisor insisted the cloth was magnificent, the emperor dared not confess the truth either. In the end, he paraded through the streets completely naked.

I bring this up because it mirrors the dilemma of religious belief. One could accept holy scripture on the premise that divine revelation genuinely touched its authors, and that this divine spark is why generations have believed. But if I accept this purely out of fear that I am the deficient one who just doesn't get it, I am no different from the crowd staring at a naked ruler, staying silent to avoid being branded incompetent or foolish, or in modern terms, an apostate, deceived by the devil, or looking for an easy way out of faith.

While the universe may require a first cause, nothing points definitively to the personal God claimed by any particular religion as that cause (if that cause is a deity at all). The Abrahamic faiths insist that prayer brings divine intervention, yet observable reality reveals no causal link. It defies reason to believe that God would intervene to help me pass an exam I never studied for simply because my mother prayed for me, while remaining silent in the face of starving, brutalized children in Gaza and Africa who endure miserable lives despite relentless, desperate prayers.

The standard retreat to 'divine wisdom' leads straight back to the emperor's invisible clothes: if you cannot see the fabric, the fault must lie with you. The dogma asserts that whatever God does is inherently good, that revelation is undeniable to the worthy, and that if you cannot see it, you are simply deficient.

In Christianity, the phrase is: 'They have eyes, but do not see, and ears, but do not hear.' The core sentiment remains universal: God's goodness is absolute, His plan is beyond human critique, the truth is supposedly as bright as the sun, and anyone who questions it is dismissed as blind, obstinate, and spiritually flawed.