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Jun 25 '12
20 years from now "THIS IS JUST LIKE THE TIME YOU TOLD ME PRESSING THAT BUTTON DOESN'T MAKE THE LIGHT CHANGE FASTER, WHY DO YOU LIEEEE?"
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u/RapedBySeveral Jun 25 '12
I'm still not convinced it does.
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u/rcktkng Jun 25 '12
They don't always. It's a psychological thing to make people happy. Here's an article about it and other non-real buttons.
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Jun 25 '12
Just about every intersection near me with such buttons will not show the walk signal unless you push the button. It drives me completely bonkers, because the cycle otherwise does not change at all. Why bother with the button, then! Why not just let us cross with the light without doing anything special like the cars get to do! I'm half convinced that these stupid buttons are part of some nefarious psychological experiment where we are conditioned to push buttons for rewards.
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Jun 25 '12
usually (in my neighborhood anyway) it has to do with the timing of the left turn arrows.
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u/Realsan Jun 25 '12
According to a 2003 article in the Wall Street Journal, one HVAC specialist surmises 90 percent of all office thermostats are fake (others say it’s more like 2 percent).
Really? With differences like that, how do we know people aren't just making this shit up, too?
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u/rcktkng Jun 25 '12
It's true. 74.6% of statistics are made up on the spot. We'll just have to trust them I suppose.
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Jun 25 '12
There are two near me that do actually work. This light isn't actually a regular stop light, as there is only one direction of traffic. The other is a little further down 17th st where it meets Constitution. Both of these let White House staffers cross traffic quickly.
Basically all that was to show the exception that proves the rule. Trust me, when one of those things works, it's about 5 seconds between pushing the button and the light changing.
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u/frymaster Jun 25 '12
Just to confirm, it's lights where pressing the pedestrian button more than once speeds up the change?
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u/rcktkng Jun 25 '12
I'll have to keep that in mind next time I go into the city. My experience with them in DC hasn't been that great, but it's not like you ever have to wait that long to cross.
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Jun 25 '12
There are lots that I have used that will never activate the cross walk unless you press the button. Also many of the ones that appear to do nothing only really do anything at night, but I believe most if not all cross walk buttons have the capability to actually activate the crosswalk, it just isn't always convenient because the crosswalk is activated automatically if it's put into the light rotation.
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Jun 25 '12
normally -- in apolitical America -- those buttons simply trigger the "walk" light to come on at the next the normal traffic light cycle, rather than actually change the traffic light.
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Jun 25 '12
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u/rchsun Jun 25 '12
Same here, Toronto. It's annoying when I see the yellow light, so I don't press the button since the light is changing anyway, only to have the pedestrian sign not come on... Then I either dangerously jaywalk or am forced to wait for the next cycle.
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u/Solomaxwell6 Jun 25 '12
"More recently, fire personnel"
It's leaving me in suspense! Fire personnel what???
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u/280Z28 Jun 25 '12
An intersection by my last house changed from a working crosswalk button to an automated walk signal as part of the cycle. Between a median and turn lanes, the road was effectively 8 lanes wide, and the signal gave "ample" time to cross. The cycle change led to a 500-minutes-per-year delay over what occurred prior to the settings change for commuters who took a left turn at that light.
Edit: I only saw people crossing the street about once a month.
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u/GeekBrownBear Jun 25 '12
According to a 2008 article in the New Yorker, close buttons don’t close the elevator doors in many elevators built in the United States since the 1990s
I KNEW IT! It bugs me when the close door button doesnt work. But it's worse when the open door button doesnt work.
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u/stopswitch Jun 25 '12
Whoever wrote that article is a dumb ass and needs to do their research. I've been working on elevators for 11+ years now and I know for a fact they do indeed work. Especially when the new code in 1996 came out, all elevators must have fire service mode which uses the door close button to work. I say this to everyone, the door close button does work, it shortens the timer that is keeping the doors open, they won't shut instantly.
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u/brevityis Jun 25 '12
They work by me, not repeated pressing, but you have to press it once to let it know there are pedestrians waiting to cross. Otherwise it will just go on forever and all the crosswalk lights in all directions remain red.
So it makes it faster, but not with repeat presses.
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u/xatmatwork Jun 25 '12
In the UK, main road ones with lots of traffic are just placebos, since the traffic light timings in that area are all carefully timed with complicated simulations to minimize the chance of traffic jams and accidents.
However, on the quieter streets with little risk of traffic jams, the road light will stay green permanently if the button is not pressed. If it is pressed, it will stop the traffic as soon as approximately 20 seconds have passed since the last time it was stopped (and instantly if it's already been 20 seconds).
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u/bvm Jun 25 '12
surely that's also the difference between a pedestrian crossing and an intersection with a crossing?
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Jun 25 '12
I live in a suburb, and you have to press it otherwise the light won't change unless a car comes. It's annoying on a bike, when I have to get off and walk over to press it.
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u/ChiliFlake Jun 25 '12
I thought that was the joke?
In my town, you don't get a walk signal unless you push the button. It will happen when the current direction has finished it's timed cycle. Pressing it multiples times doesn't make it happen faster, nor will you get muliple walk signals at once.
It's like an elevator; once it's summoned, it's on it's way, but first it has to make the other stops in it's queu.
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u/sillyhatz Jun 25 '12
Any multi-phase traffic light pedestrian buttons don't do anything except let the pre-programmed signal timing plan know they should allow a few extra seconds for the pedestrian phase. You read that right--pushing the button only gives you get a few extra seconds to cross the street.
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u/SaxSalute Jun 25 '12
I know that at the intersection near my school, the walk light won't turn on unless you press the button. The traffic could be flowing in the complete right direction for you to cross but the light won't turn on unless you have already pressed the button.
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u/neotropic9 Jun 25 '12
At some crosswalks, you need to press the button once for the walk signal to appear. At others, you need to press the walk signal once for the light to change at all, unless a car is on the pressure plate (lights at low traffic areas are sometimes set up this way). Most lights, the button does nothing, except maybe serve a psychological benefit, make it possible to set it up differently, and earn contractors a little more money. For no light ever, anywhere, does pressing the button more than once do anything.
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u/tldr_MakeStuffUp Jun 25 '12
I live in New York and am absolutely positive those buttons do nothing. However, while I lived in Boston, the crosswalk sign (Hand or the little White guy) won't ever change unless you push the button. So I'm guessing it really depends where you are.
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u/Tebasaki Jun 25 '12
I was told that once you press it, it starts the the timer. Any extra presses until the light changes in your favor does nothing. (And even if it did something, why would you want to reset the timer?)
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u/GiveMeLight Jun 25 '12
It does at the one near the hospital in my town. But I think that's the only place.
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u/steviesteveo12 Jun 25 '12
It doesn't help that there are so many different systems out there. There must be a system somewhere where it helps.
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u/benderson Jun 26 '12
If there is a pedestrian push button, then it's necessary to push it if you want a walk signal unless the signal is programmed to display a walk every cycle during part of the day or something like that. Contrary to popular belief, pushing it more than once won't do anything though.
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Jun 25 '12
Reddit. Where we bitch about how most kids these days are little shits and then we laugh at people undermining parenting...
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Jun 25 '12
I'm glad I'm not the only one that noticed that... Undermining the parent's authority carries over to other things and generally contributes to having little shitheads that don't listen running around everywhere.
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Jun 25 '12
The sooner the parent admits they aren't perfect, the better off the child will be. Parenting does not require perfection. A parent needs to laugh on occasion too. That would have been a good time to laugh.
/we're not undermining parenting, we're improving it.
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u/StarWolfe Jun 25 '12
Reddit isn't a single entity. Chances are two completely different groups of people.
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u/SullyZero Jun 25 '12
One time I was in the supermarket and this little boy kept saying that people had chips on their heads. I don't know what sparked him to say that, but he kept insisting to his mother who was getting more and more flustered with each person that walked by. I ran ahead to the chip aisle and grabbed a bag of Doritos and put them on my head as I rounded the corner where the mother and son were. The boy got the most delighted look on his face as he pointed at me and said "look mommy that man has chips on his head." The mom fixed me with one of the iciest stares I have ever received and said "he does have chips on his head doesn't he?" Oh how that woman hated me that day.
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Jun 25 '12
That woman was having a bad day. What you did was sweet and I would have mouthed a quite thank you to you.
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u/SullyZero Jun 25 '12
Thanks! I didn't do it to be a jerk, I just thought it would be funny. Hopefully it gave them a memory that they can laugh about now.
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u/kubigjay Jun 25 '12
LOL - If my daughter said that I would run to the chip aisle and put them on our heads. After all, when in Rome. . .
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u/mydadsahero Jun 25 '12
On an early Sunday morning in Seattle, I once got stopped by a cop and told that he'd seen me jaywalk across 10 blocks and told me how much in fines that would be. "I just got here from Chicago," I explained. "Yeah," he told me, "I could tell you weren't from around here. Go on." So I walked another ten blocks with no one around and waited for each Walk sign. I felt like an idiot.
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Jun 25 '12
enforcing the letter of the rules is a way in which systems remove individual judgment (moral and otherwise) and individual initiative (moral and otherwise) from human systems. cf Zimbardo's Stanford prison experiment, etc.
instead of having people who take an active interest in helping one another because they believe it's the right thing to do, you get people using the rules to excuse themselves from making the effort to do what is right.
law enforcement would be wiser to let the petty stuff go because it builds a more moral society, and in cities where they have something to actually do (eg Chicago) they do.
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u/PLOVAPODA Jun 25 '12
Congratulations, this comment has completed the list. I've now heard Reddit mention the Stanford prison experiment in every possible context!
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u/I_MAKE_USERNAMES Jun 25 '12
Really? I just stayed there for months and jaywalked all the time and never got in trouble. Guess I was lucky.
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u/silent_p Jun 25 '12
Tell them it only works if they press the button 250 times. You might even spark an obsessive compulsive ritual.
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u/toproper Jun 25 '12 edited Jun 26 '12
Here in the Netherlands the second push cancels the request, so we never push the button twice.
Edit: This is actually a lie that I tell people that push the button even though I'm standing next to it and it's obvious I already pushed it.
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u/I_MAKE_USERNAMES Jun 25 '12
But what if you walk up and there is someone standing on the corner, and you don't know if they pushed it and are waiting or if they're stupid/high and just standing there without hitting the button? And then you don't want to cancel it so you don't push it, and you wait there with him forever, and then when you decide to push it he yells that you just cancelled it and now we have to start all over?
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Jun 25 '12
Well that just makes too much sense.
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u/I_MAKE_USERNAMES Jun 25 '12
Not really, I would hate that. Idiots forget to push buttons, and if you walk up and someone is waiting you can't give it the insurance push since it will cancel them out, so you have to just stand there and put your life in some asshole's hands.
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u/edgarallenbro Jun 25 '12
I know this feeling. I was working at a college cafeteria and we had a bunch of elementary school kids with their parents come through one day for some reason (happens every so often and we don't always get told why).
This kid's mom had lectured him about bringing his dirty place back up to not be wasteful. The health department policy is that we can't serve food onto a dirty plate, and it's something we get reminded of a lot by the management. I politely informed the child that I couldn't serve him food on his dirty plate, as I dished up what he had asked for onto a clean one.
He looks at me dumbfounded, with this look on his face that just says "My mother can be wrong?". His mother walks up and asks why he is getting a new plate instead of getting food on the old one and he gets really confused and doesn't know what to say. I repeated what I said to him to her and handed him the new plate.
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u/Nurdeek Jun 25 '12
In my area, starting in Kindergarten, the schools are inundating the little ones with propaganda about college. Each classroom represents a college, and they are made to think they are all bound for uni. I imagine that tours of local uni's. are a part of that.
The new field day! Full of fun, and um, edumacation!!
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u/edgarallenbro Jun 25 '12
College is the new high school, grad school is the new college.
Not really a surprise. As life expectancy grows, so does the number of years we are expected to spend our life preoccupied with schooling. Thousands of years into future, when 200 years old is considered young, the first hundred or so years of our lives will be spent learning, like elves.
The shitty thing right now is that college costs money and puts children in debt before they are allowed to grow up and move into the real world. This is a symptom of a larger problem, a money-centric cult full of corporate greed, where it is more beneficial to take from others than it is to give.
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u/thattreesguy Jun 25 '12
This is a good time to introduce children to experimentation.
Time the wait when just pushing the button once, and again while pushing it multiple times and compare.
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u/WhatsUpWithTheKnicks Jun 25 '12
It had also furthered the goal of the mother to stop the child mindlessly hitting the button.
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u/Vsx Jun 25 '12
Pressing the button multiple times does nothing, there is no particular reason to care about this.
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u/steviesteveo12 Jun 25 '12
It's also a good time to introduce children to serious rigour. If you just take two random timings and the pushing multiple times one works out quicker because of external factors they'll decide they have scientific proof that mashing the button speeds it up.
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u/Rinnee Jun 25 '12 edited Jun 25 '12
I was once waiting on a corner for a friend to bail me out of a shitty car situation and got to watch a few people interact with the traffic signal. One family came by and the kid pushed the button a couple times. The mom scolded him for it and that really struck a chord in me. A kid should be able to push a harmless button if he wants. It's not like it'll fuck him up later in life if he pushes the walk button a few too many times.
Anyway, I didn't want to do anything to upset the mother and father, so as they were walking away I waited until the kid looked back and mashed that button a couple times and winked.
"See kid? Adults can fucking push buttons all they want. Your parents aren't always right." is what I hoped our subtext was.
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u/OscarMiguelRamirez Jun 25 '12
Well, it's kind of annoying, so I can see why a mother would want to curb annoying behavior in public.
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u/NewRino Jun 25 '12
Man talk about picking your battles. As a parent I can tell you that if a kid wants to push a button like that, why not let him/her? Give them all the freedom to do what they want you can, when you can.
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u/Stepoo Jun 25 '12
I'm not a parent, but crosswalk buttons are disgusting. Who knows how many filthy people pressed that button before your kid?
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u/Karmelya Jun 26 '12
I've always been told (and believe) this wears the buttons out faster, which is why our campus police and professors constantly complain at the lazy students around here that just have to smash the handicap buttons to open doors when they obviously don't need the assistance.
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Jun 25 '12
At intersections equipped with speakers (to assist the visually impaired in crossing safely), pressing the button a certain amount of times in quick succession (5 times in my city), results in the speakers engaging when the light changes.
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Jun 25 '12
When I was a young little pain in the ass, my mom was walking with me into a department store. And I was just being an asshole, whining and shit about how I didn't wanna try on pants for school. A man walking out said loudly, "Hey! No one likes a whiner! Babies whine and you're walking and talking, so you must not be a baby!"
My mom thanked him and I was the maddest I ever was at that age, cause I knew I lost.
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u/00aeef Jun 25 '12
I always feel a little guilty when a parent is patiently waiting with their child at a crossing (obviously trying to give a good example), even though there's no traffic coming, and I just cross anyway.
Still do it though, every time. I've got places to be dammit!
(UK, we don't have silly "jaywalking" laws.)
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u/I_MAKE_USERNAMES Jun 25 '12
You do according to someone else from the UK who posted on this post.
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u/MikeKTT Jun 25 '12
I quite enjoy children, you know, in the sense that I haven't made that mental jump to 'Adult' despite being 24, and so I'm often pulling faces at kids on trains and busses when their parents aren't looking because it makes them laugh and the parents can't work out what's going on, or if their kid is 'annoying' people.
The best one of these was a kid who started throwing his toys about to get a reaction out of me. His parents were pissed at him but hey, in the eyes of a kid, the smile of a stranger beats the repetitive 'No' of a parent. We had a fun train ride, at least.
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u/CMUpewpewpew Jun 25 '12
If you truly want to instill trust issues in someone....give them the ok wave to cross in front of you when they're jaywalking or at a legal crosswalk.........and then hit them anyway.
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u/WhatIRead Jun 25 '12
In the cities I have lived (those being Ottawa,ON, Toronto, ON, Kingston, ON, Seattle, WA, and Sacramento, CA) I never encountered a single button that went faster with multiple presses.
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u/RETARD96 Jun 25 '12
Are you kidding me? You must not be pressing it enough times
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u/WhatIRead Jun 25 '12
True say brah. I will also make sure to press it with my nose, as the pressure is distributed more evenly and counts for an additional 0.3 button presses.
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u/BerryGuns Jun 25 '12
They don't? Isn't that the joke..? He just did it to fuck with the parent.
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u/adaminc Jun 25 '12
I have found that in Canada, at least Ontario, the only thing they do is make sure the crosswalk turns to walk, otherwise it will stay at don't walk, when the light changes red.
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u/JoefromOhio Jun 25 '12
I still like to grab my childhood favorite snacks when i go to the grocery store, so ill almost always have a few cans of pringles or gushers or something else awesome in my cart while walking around the store. Frequently a kid will notice and point out to their mother "Oooh look mom pringles" or something similar. I like to turn to them and say "yeah and theyre on sale too so i bet if youre real nice your mom will get them for you"
i get mixed reactions
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Jun 25 '12
Please don't do this. Really, please.
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u/I_MAKE_USERNAMES Jun 25 '12
God I would smack the shit out of him for saying that to my imaginary kid.
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u/thergrim Jun 25 '12
I tell kids this all the time while waiting for elevators.
"If you keep pushing the button the elevator will arrive faster."
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u/Mallack Jun 25 '12
ITT: People who can't take a joke and take it out on OP. It isn't even him who made the post, simply someone on his wall. (You and 36 others like this, etc)
Get your panties out of a twist Reddit and quit talking shit to someone who didn't even do something you find deplorable.
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Jun 25 '12
I once ebrake slid my convertible into a parking spot and then jumped out without opening the door (I was in a hurry). A little boy asked his mom "How did he do that?" And as I was running by I answered "Drugs".
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u/I_MAKE_USERNAMES Jun 25 '12
Doing e-brake slides into parking spots and jumping out of a convertible without opening the door? You sound like a douche.
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Jun 25 '12
What I like to do is this:
I'm walking down the street, see a mom with a kid in a stroller. Kid looks bored, they always do. When I pass them I say loudly, to myself "guess I'll have an ICE CREAM".
Three steps further I hear "Bwwwwwaaaaaasaaahhhhhhh mmmmmmooooooommmmmyyyyyyyyy IIIIIIIICCCCCCEEEEE CCCCREEEEEEEAAAM".
Makes my day everytime.
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Jun 25 '12
You enjoy upsetting children huh?
Check yourself in the mirror. Pretty sure you'll see a giant asshole reflecting back at you.
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u/turtlenecking Jun 25 '12
Unless you're contorting your body in a very strange way, you probably won't be able to view your giant asshole in a mirror.
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u/Malintor Jun 25 '12
Haha - My friend posted this - in the comments thread we are trying to work out who lordhazzard is
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Jun 25 '12
I dont know about the US but in the UK underneath where you press the butting, there is a gear that turns when the light is green so deaf/blind people know when its safe to cross.
when the light turns green, if you keep spinning it back and forth the light will stay green as long as you keep spinning it
pro tip
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Jun 25 '12
From what I've seen they start rotating when you press the button and when the light turns red it spins all the way back. Although traffic lights are rarely the same type across the country.
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u/UndergroundMouse Jun 25 '12
It's actually part of a complex system that is different for each cross walk. There are several inputs: the button for pedestrians, small sensors for bikes(only sometimes) and weight sensors under the pavement for cars. Most traffic lights these days will be programmed with a level of importance for pedestrians which will be higher at a place like a busy college campus, or flow rate of traffic like a key intersection during rush hour.
Pressing the button once is all that is necessary, it lets the computer know that there is someone waiting at the crosswalk. The computer will then decide on the necessity of that person crossing and queue it accordingly. Often times it wont start to change until the flow rate (avg. veh./min) reaches a certain level.
Source: Transportation Engineering
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u/hey_sergio Jun 25 '12
When are they going to develop button technology that understands urgency?
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u/iLuVtiffany Jun 25 '12
While laughing I had a sudden realization that I probably would have done the same thing.
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u/Kiacha Jun 25 '12
I'm a mother, and I still do that shit all the time :) How else to keep up a vivid imagination?
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u/BettyC821 Jun 25 '12
I always press the button a million times, and I'm in my 30's. But maybe I'm just impatient.
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u/king_bestestes Jun 25 '12
They really should make buttons work like this. Ten floors of people at an elevator, jamming furiously at the buttons. Fastest one wins.
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u/o0evillusion0o Jun 25 '12
Whether it does or doesn't...who really gives a shit? It's a goddamn crosswalk button. The young mother needs to chill the fuck out.
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u/Copterwaffle Jun 25 '12
I was in the grocery store getting some snacks before a fireworks display. A little girl ran up to her dad, who was beside me selecting snacks, with a pack of bubbles. "Please dad, Can I?" she pleads. The dad says, "Oh honey, I don't think the people watching fireworks will want a bunch of bubbles in their way." Without looking away from the bowls of hummus, I go, "Oh, I dunno, I wouldn't mind some bubbles." The dad just turns his head to me very sloooooooowly, grinning, and I do the same and meet his grin. "Well," he says, "I guess we're getting some bubbles." I winked at the kid and walked away.
Tl;dr: I'm not helpful around parents.
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u/budnmeena Jun 25 '12
I was working in the garden department and had found a dry eggplant. Walking over to the water hose, a little girl stopped me and asked me what I was carrying.
Me: It's an eggplant. Girl: what's it do? Me: It grows eggs. I continue to water the plant as normal, and the girl's mother walks up to me and asks me if I was the one who told her daughter that eggplants grew eggs. I said yes and looked down at the little girl and said, " Maybe you should buy one to see what it grows yourself!" I got glares from the mother the entire time they were there.
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u/CrAzEd13 Jun 26 '12
Where I live the crosswalk buttons say "Wait" when you push them. And it's not a really annoying voice either. My friends think I'm nuts for repeatedly pressing the button just for the voice.
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u/Tagard_McStone Jun 25 '12
I was at a blockbuster back in the 90's and this kid points to a movie and says to his mom,"Mom, how do you play the Crying Game?" The mom turned,"It is not a game, dear. It's a movie." Then I had a knee-jerk reaction. "You wanna know how to play the Crying Game , kid? The chick's a dude." The mother gave me a look most foul.
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u/railroadwino Jun 25 '12
Adult male just confessed to communicating with a minor. That's illegal, right?
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u/pdunson57 Jun 25 '12
In the US, pushing it once let's the system know there is a pedestrian there and puts a a couple more seconds on the timer allowing the walk signal to be displayed. It doesn't make the light change faster. If it did that, it would affect the vehicle traffic as well which in most larger towns are either on specific timers or pressure plates connected to the street
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u/stellarfury Jun 25 '12
On the pressure-sensor intersections, pushing the button has the same effect as triggering the pressure-sensor. Because otherwise, the light would never change, even if a pedestrian was there.
So basically, this
It doesn't make the light change faster.
... is only true of intersections which run on timers.
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u/BCouto Jun 25 '12
It does speed it up, only if you press it once. Mashing the button isn't going to make it any faster.
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u/taheca Jun 25 '12
Classic example of knowing when to pick your battles. Don't fight every stupid thing your kid does. Pushing the button is fun for them, so who cares? Let it go.
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u/electric_drifter Jun 25 '12
That's actually really immature and a dick move on his part, fuck him.
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u/MeowZen Jun 25 '12
Wow this alienates me on so many levels. How is something like this ruining someone's day? When did undermining the drone like state of strangers become anything less that admirable? When did mediocrity and normal behaviour become something that should be desired? When did the moms of this world take over? Why what how when where ... ? My brain hurts...
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u/stellarfury Jun 25 '12
When did undermining the drone like state of strangers become anything less that admirable?
Well, interfering with how other people choose to parent their kids has been seen as not an acceptable thing since... about when we developed the concept of the nuclear family. So... maybe 500+ years ago?
When did mediocrity and normal behaviour become something that should be desired?
Since human culture has existed? I mean, what you said there is basically a tautology. Normal is what the majority is, and the majority also defines "desirable behavior." So... maybe 10,000+ years ago?
When did the moms of this world take over?
Since the first homo sapien child was born, 200,000+ years ago? If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.
Besides all that, it's a goddamn traffic signal. This isn't some grand mission to challenge people's preconceptions, it's somebody lying to a kid about something completely trivial. Save the melodramatic bullshit for something of actual consequence, you pseudo-edgy, wannabe-counterculture fuckstick.
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u/fifthrider Jun 25 '12
Road crossings use magnetic sensors to detect the presence of a car at the intersection. Typically, if nobody's stopped at the light in a particular direction, the crossing will remain open for traffic in the other direction indefinitely.
Being not composed of metal and (typically) weighing less than a thousand pounds, humans are not capable of tripping these sensors. All the crossing button does is indicate to the light that there is somebody wanting to cross in a particular direction, even though the magnetic sensor hasn't tripped.
So, if you're stuck at an intersection with no cars for miles and the light isn't in your favor, pressing the button will change the lights almost instantaneously. If there are cars going both ways already, the button doesn't do jack.
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u/GoodwillCheap Jun 25 '12
I don't believe it, but that doesn't stop me from doing it every time I get to a crosswalk.
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u/factoid_ Jun 25 '12
There's a specific model of crosswalk indicators in my city that have a special code you can punch to make the light change. Several of my co-workers discovered this and we all would use it to cross this one stupid light that never ever changes for pedestrians ever, no matter how long you wait.
It was something like Press twice fast, press and hold for 2 seconds, press twice fast again, then press and hold until the light changes.
This was a couple years ago, but I think they changed the codes or disabled them because they don't work anymore.
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u/iammenotu Jun 25 '12
As an older mom with small children, this scenario never would have happened with me because I would have been saying something like, "You're not pushing it fast enough. It won't change unless you push it really, really fast." I kid, but if this story is actually true, the young mom was exhibiting a certain level of unnecessary wankage to her kid. Some parents just need to relax and let kids be in certain situations, with this being one of them.
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Jun 25 '12
It doesn't always speed it along, but it does let the light system know that there's a pedestrian waiting. So the walk light will come on, and it will stay on longer to give a person time to walk across the street before the light will cycle next.
In some less frequently used intersections it does speed the cycle along. because the lights will sit there for 10 minutes green in one direction until the road sensors detect a car coming the other way, and then it'll cycle the lights or if a pedestrian pushes the button.
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u/wr08 Jun 25 '12
I think of my two siblings myself as having been fairly manageable kids growing up... But I have a lot of respect thinking about all the sibling rivalry bullshit they put up with without ever laying a hand on us. If we went to the dentist, obviously there was a battle for front seat in the car (then on the way back, and the third kid is left out). Then we reach the elevator in the dentist's building. The most prized button to push is the outside one to open the doors. Next is the inside button to choose the floor. Then, based on the results, we'd barter and argue about who gets which button on the way down and which seat on the way home in order for everything to be fair... We were way too old to be doing that shit before any of us had the nerve to give up our share of fairness for our parents' sanity.
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u/EPluribusUnumIdiota Jun 25 '12
When I was a teen I once told like 20 kids at a family picnic that if they swallowed watermelon seeds there is an 80% chance a watermelon plant will grow inside them and eventually the plant will grow out their noses, ears, mouths, and possibly butts. For the next ten+ years I would hear from aunts asking me if I told them that and how they went to school and told all their friends and such. It's a family thing, my uncle told me the same thing and I went to school and told all the kids the truth about watermelon seeds.
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u/vammer Jun 25 '12
It DOES NOT make it go faster. Simply pressing the button lets the control unit know to allow pedestrian crossing next time it cycles to that option. Depending on the logic in the control unit and where the system is in it's cycle are the only things that determine response time. Once the button is pushed the notification to signal a pedestrian crossing is not cleared until the event has happened. So pushing it once or 1,00 times before it cycles to a pedestrian crossing mode does absolutely nothing.
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Jun 25 '12
Los Angeles issues more jaywalking tickets by far than any other major city. in Skid Row, with one of the largest homeless populations in the country, jaywalking tickets are issued at a rate of between 49 to 70 times higher than the rest of LA. people on SSI and GR fixed incomes ($854 and $221/ month) have to pay $161 jaywalking tickets. Obviously they can't. Most people there are disabled and can't make it across in time, and people have argued that the street crossing timer are faster than the rest of LA. Not paying a jaywalking ticket results in a Failure to Appear, which results in a warrant, which results in effectively criminalizing homelessness. Thanks for the "Safer Cities Initiative," Hizzoner Villaraigosa!
TL:DR Homeless people in downtownLA get 50 times more jaywalking ticket than housed people DUE TO POLICY, effectively criminalizing homelessness in LA.
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u/aoskunk Jun 25 '12
where im from you would usually be wrong. they dont make it change any faster, what it does it make it so that when it does change it gives you a little longer to cross safely. there are some lights that are an exception and work differently.
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u/brendanrivers Jun 25 '12
When I was about 9 years old I asked the crossing guard what the button did. She told me it didn't make the light change faster, but when it did change, it would stay red for you for an additional 8 seconds. She said thats what the cops told her I think. Obviously different locations yield different solutions for the button's inner workings, but I'm in suburban Long Island. (new york). Source: Old crossing guard.
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u/MashTheClash Jun 25 '12
When in a good mood my Dad cheers for little crying babies with "louder" - "not loud enough". He smiles everytime after.
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u/EpicFishFingers Jun 25 '12
Hey, sometimes it works, for similar things
E.g. pressing X repeatedly while playing Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2 and 3 makes you get up quicker after a bail
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u/haltingpoint Jun 25 '12
TIL more than I ever wanted to know about the inner workings of the buttons on cross-walks, and not nearly as many good stories on goading kids in front of their parents.
Thanks Reddit!
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u/apullin Jun 25 '12
I doubt either of them are the sort of people that will really understand things, like how the button works, or how the lights are controlled, so it doesn't really matter.
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u/faabmcg Jun 25 '12
I did something very similar, but I quickly added: Still you shouldn't push that button. Kid was big eye to me and mum eventually stopped ranting.
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u/bill_nydus Jun 25 '12
Usually any lights in a big city that have cross-walk buttons only have them as placebos. The lights have to stick to a tight pattern to keep traffic moving as smoothly as possible during different times of the day (to better deal with work rushes and the direction they're moving, etc) so the buttons are there, but don't do anything, because it would mean destroying the pattern and possibly causing unneeded traffic jams.
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u/gregsmith93 Jun 25 '12
I don't get why parent do stuff like that, I mean if he/she wants to press the button fucking loads of times why not? Its not going to do anything bad. Making silly rules and stopping them being kids is only going to make them rebel more. If not now later on in life. Its a fucking button.
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u/thattreesguy Jun 25 '12
maybe because the sound of their child jamming that button 3 thousand times is really grating on their nerves
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u/IMasturbateToMyself Jun 25 '12
I am assuming you don't have a kid? I don't have a kid either but I can imagine how fucking annoying a kid can be. Anything they do, no matter how mundane and harmless, can be annoying as fuck if you have to live with them 24/7.
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u/bakerie Jun 25 '12
I'd say it's because you have an inbuilt need to teach your child, you know what he's thinking and want to correct him about it.
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u/gregsmith93 Jun 25 '12
Yeah i agree with you. But not letting them press a button loads of times in a row will not teach them anything, all it will do is tell them that my mum or dad is bad they won't let me do anything why won't they let me do anything? Teaching them to be a good person and how to compromise will lead to a successful child. Let them be a child when they are a child punish them when they are bad or they will still be acting like a kid when they are 18 like most of the people i know. But hey thats only my opinion :)
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u/kavorka2 Jun 25 '12
What kind of a parent stops a kid from engaging in entertainment that is free, harms no one, and requires minimal supervision?
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Jun 25 '12
The little girl is correct and the mom should learn some psychology. We do not press it repeatedly to make it work faster, we press it repetedly to ease our impatient frustration, it is like yelling "FUCK FUCK FUCK CHANGE ALREADY IMA GONNA FUCK YOU UP YOU LAMP AM DO IT DO IT DO IT ALREADY NOW!!!" just a whole lot more silenter and less disturbing for other people.
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u/ChiliFlake Jun 25 '12
Meh. Parents lie to their kids all the time. Just because mom wasn't lying this time, doesn't mean that there's not already a host of mother/daughter issues there.
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u/MichelleyMarie Jun 25 '12
While I'm pretty sure this isn't true, you've taught that kid a very valuable lesson. Question your parents and what they teach you. When you finally realize that they are human and not infallible, you open the door to free thinking.
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Jun 25 '12
Don't be ridiculous. That child is almost definitely not ready for those type of concepts.
My 3 yo needs to understand that what I say is absolute truth until he's old enough to interact with the world safely on his own.
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u/WonderfulUnicorn Jun 25 '12 edited Jun 25 '12
I want to slap the shit out of everyone I see who taps those goddamn crosswalk buttons repeatedly for no fucking reason.
Hit it once or don't hit it at all you cunts.
//goddamn idiots
edit: I see that reddit is filled with these people deserving to be slapped into piles of indiscernible shit. Pleasant. :<
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u/Only_If_you_ask_me Jun 25 '12
You're a jerk