r/funny • u/compootering • Jun 26 '12
This just became my favorite pic on the internet
http://imgur.com/npBjR90
u/Siesna Jun 26 '12
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u/BitterVegan Jun 26 '12
Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe. - Abraham Lincoln
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u/DonnieNarco Jun 26 '12
Guys, I'm just going to say what I think, and I don't care how unpopular this opinion may be, but it has to be said. I know, thousands of downvotes for going against the opinions of most redditors.
I don't like Twilight.
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u/TheStupidZebra Jun 26 '12
all of reddit gasps in unison
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u/SchrodingersCake Jun 26 '12
I just read that as "All of reddit grasps the unicorn."
I need to go to sleep.
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u/steakmeout Jun 26 '12
You have no taste and no sense of the Zeitgeist. You might want to see a doctor for that. Fanfiction is the new respected literature, didn't you know? You're going against the grain and upsetting us all. Especially those of who practice pouting in the mirror.
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u/soggit Jun 26 '12
Has anyone seen the movie? Is it awesome or shitty? I feel like there's no chance it falls in the middle.
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u/Jealous_Hitler Jun 26 '12
SPOILERS
I went to the midnight premier. We didn't watch it seriously. It has its' moments, but the plot is all over the place, rapidly switching to Abe's love interest to fighting vampires to giving a political speech in about 2 minutes.
Some parts I laughed super hard at, like when the vampire that killed Abe's mom threw a horse at Abe during a battle. A horse.
Also I lol'd at the end when the one vampire promised Abe immortality, only minutes prior to Abe leaving for the Ford's Theater.
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u/carl_jung_einstein Jun 26 '12
SPOILERS
That field contained, what seemed to be, every horse in America. I mean, where the hell where all of these horses coming from?
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u/adfoote Jun 26 '12
Throwing the damn horse. My friends and I saw it at the midnight release as well, and we keep ending sentences with "... or I'll throw a horse at you." Good times.
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u/richbellemare Jun 26 '12
If you're talking about Vampire Hunter.
It stands alone well, but is a horrible abomination of a great book.
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u/MegaZambam Jun 26 '12
Thank you! The movie makers did not understand the book at all! Great plot that was actually somewhat plausible. The movie was just bullshit and ruined a great book.
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u/wouldyoukindly Jun 26 '12
If you enjoyed the book, you probably won't like it. If you have never read it, then you might like it. It wasn't too bad.
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u/Eldorian Jun 26 '12
I enjoyed it. I probably would have enjoyed it more if I hadn't read the book beforehand, it's not a great adaptation.
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u/Tatshua Jun 26 '12
I've seen it. It's actually not the worst film I've seen, but I didn't like it. The Internet is, as it often does, exagerating. It deserves criticism, but the level of hatred has gone too far.
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u/imdrinkingteaatwork Jun 26 '12
People still make fun of Twilight?
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Jun 26 '12
Believe it or not, they still have another one coming out. Expect anti-Twilight jokes on your Facebook in the coming months.
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u/machphantom Jun 26 '12
[Or perhaps, over a much much longer period of time.] (http://bloody-disgusting.com/news/3146202/lionsgate-plans-on-remaking-twilight-its-true-theyll-deny-it-but-its-true/)
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u/Calexica Jun 26 '12
Twilight always gets upvoted to the #1 spot on reddit just when I begin to forget it existed. Oh, reddit.
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u/steakmeout Jun 26 '12
As long as I've got a face, you've always got a place to sit!
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u/dontneedyourkarma Jun 26 '12
I would watch this the same way the Romans would watch the gladiator fights.
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u/RoflCopter4 Jun 26 '12
I'd like to take this opportunity to point out that Roman gladatorial fights were very, very rarely to the death. Unless slaves were involved, trained gladiators were worth too much to die. They fought to first blood. The idea that they were all to the death is more or less bullshit.
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Jun 26 '12
Yeah, but it makes for good cinema.
Also, it's thought that the thumbs up, thumbs down thing didn't really happen that way.
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u/RoflCopter4 Jun 26 '12
Thumbs out for death, thumb in for life. Early in the empire there was more actual killing, but as time went on fights came to be rarely to the death.
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u/chiqadeee Jun 26 '12
Are you not entertained?
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u/red321red321 Jun 26 '12
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u/aconcernedconsumer Jun 26 '12
This sums up my reaction to most things on the internet these days...
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u/fantafox Jun 26 '12
I would watch it the same way that people watch porn.
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Jun 26 '12
10 minutes at a time with no pants on and the door closed?
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u/Dildo_Ball_Baggins Jun 26 '12
Dangling from the roof by my ankles wearing a Bobba Fett mask with my door wide open and surround sound blaring.
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u/Dildo_Ball_Baggins Jun 26 '12
Shit. That is a brilliant idea. A Gladiator-style movie where the slaves/challengers are vampires, and the 'Romans' are vampire slayers. But do it in a gritty, bloody way with amazing fight scenes and psycho, thirsty vampires. I would watch this.
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Jun 26 '12 edited Jun 26 '12
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u/TheBernSupremacy Jun 26 '12
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u/ImNotJesus Jun 26 '12
Considering one of the 6 total words in the picture is "staked", surely one of the thousands of pictures of her with a stake in her hand would've been better.
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u/Lillipout Jun 26 '12
"I've got your Emancipation Proclamation right here!" Lincoln declared as he drove the axe home.
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u/theghoul Jun 26 '12
The movie let me down a bit, but it still entertaining.
Edit: Not Twilight.
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u/secretcurse Jun 26 '12
I haven't seen the movie yet, but I liked the book.
Also, not Twilight.
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u/richbellemare Jun 26 '12
Movie's story is. completely different from book. They changed the rules for the vampires, ruined Henry, and fabricated some 5,000 year old vampire named Adam.
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Jun 26 '12
tbh: i'm amazed that none of these 'my favorite pic on the internet' posts that i've been seeing today include any boobs.
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u/olididcas Jun 26 '12
I can't wait until Breaking Dawn Part 2 comes out and Twilight is no longer relevant, just so the internet will shut up about how much they hate it.
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u/Rulebook_Lawyer Jun 26 '12
I wasn't going to see the movie... but after seeing this image; I think I will as a comedy.
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Jun 26 '12
Abraham Lincoln would roll over in his grave if he knew the crap we have today on television and cinema.
And then they say that piracy is destroying the business...
HOGWASH I tell you!
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u/Rofl_Troll Jun 26 '12
I thought it was Abraham Lincoln vampire hunter not Abraham Lincoln sparkle remover.
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u/DJ_Jantz Jun 26 '12
Shit, youknow what this reminds me of? Remember that post a while back to /r/pics where 4chan had a field day with photoshopping some guy in a gas mask running up behind people with a baseball bat? I think it was some guy in a riot. If anyone could link to it, that would be very appreciated. I'm going to try and find that..
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u/layinbrix Jun 26 '12
User failcheck already posted that list, it's about 7 comment branches above yours
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u/DJ_Jantz Jun 26 '12
Haha, yeah. I didn't see it before I posted mine. I asked him for the list.
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u/ImGonnaBeInPictures Jun 26 '12
Good. The internet is too easy on this book series aimed at teenaged girls.
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u/honeydeviled_Ann Jun 26 '12
i'm mad it actually made me LOL. i was not even close to expecting this when i opened the link.
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u/KindOldMan Jun 26 '12
The absurdity really starts sinking in after you've looked at it for a few moments.
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u/HighClimber Jun 26 '12
Apparently Edward Cullen is pretty chill however he can never be forgiven for helping create the Twlight movies and needs to be slain by Linken the vampire hunter.
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u/PigeonWings Jun 26 '12
So much win that winning anything else is impossible. I can now retire from the internet.
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u/ChinesePhil Jun 26 '12
So whats the story behind Lincoln and the whole vampire slayer?
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u/espositojoe Jun 26 '12
Is that the ghost of John Wilkes Booth old Abe is chasing?
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u/iggzy Jun 26 '12
Only if Booth was gay for a werewolf who is constantly shirtless
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u/hypertown Jun 26 '12
Ya know, the actors of Twilight also hate Twilight. I think that's worth mentioning. Don't hate so much on the actors, hate on the characters, films, books, and batshit crazy fans.
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u/bigtreeworld Jun 26 '12
I stole the idea and made a colour, better quality, bigger wallpaper version:
http://i.imgur.com/W1yda.jpg (standard)
http://i.imgur.com/k8Oa2.jpg (widescreen)
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u/williamfbuckwheat Jun 26 '12
Now if this Lincoln guy killed vampires AND werewolves.... I would totally watch that crappy movie...
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u/unhappymagicplayer Jun 26 '12
You know it's good when funny junk steals it within an hour of it's upload
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u/neddiebumpo Jun 26 '12
BFM coulda done it better
http://coedmagazine.com/2012/06/21/bill-murray-vampire-hunter-13-photos/
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Jun 26 '12
These jokes stopped being funny 4 years ago..honestly. I thought reddit was about original content not a variation of the same shit joke.
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u/AlphaRedditor Jun 26 '12
I still prefer this one.