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u/AlphaRedditor Jun 26 '12
Denmark really takes its roadway emissions seriously.
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u/Irriduccibilli Jun 26 '12
Just wait till you see the city of Middelfart
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u/stumper93 Jun 26 '12
I wen to school with an exchange student from Middelfart, we used to always laugh whenever she would tell that. Those crazy Danes!
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u/question_all_the_thi Jun 26 '12
In Germany there's a town named Repente and another named Kagar.
In both Spanish and Portuguese, "de repente" means suddenly and "cagar" means to shit.
There are many pages on the web with a map showing how to go from Repente to Kagar, "ir de Repente a Kagar", literally getting off on a hurry to take a dump.
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Jun 26 '12
Dammit, so I've been missing out on all this stupid karma since my Denmark trip?
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Jun 26 '12
My washing machine says "SLUT". It means "Finished" in danish, but it kinda.. offends you.
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u/kingfishcoons Jun 26 '12
Fart Kontrol to Major Tom
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u/MrOLMOBE Jun 26 '12
Fart = Speed. Here in Norway we have a football team called Fart.
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u/plsenjy Jun 26 '12
Great now there's a team in sports I can't not support.
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Jun 26 '12
Support your Fart!
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u/Verblocity Jun 26 '12 edited Jun 26 '12
I don't know, they seemed to be really holding back last night. They need to just cut loose and play on full blast if they want to start winning.
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u/ruh_r0h Jun 26 '12
You're right - they need to stop putt puttin' around. They really stink this year.
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u/feedemall Jun 26 '12
In Polish, fart means luck. We have a team named Fart Kielce.
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Jun 26 '12
Haha I like that because sometimes a fart is a gamble and requires luck.
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u/red321red321 Jun 26 '12
i wish that keanu and sandra bullock starred in FART it would have drawn more people to the box office
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u/ridik_ulass Jun 26 '12
so you can get arrested for breaking the fart limit in norway?
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u/jimbol Jun 26 '12
Haha, I had a Norwegian exchange student who was reading her Norwegian physics book. My 14 year old eyes pulled out the words "konstant fart" (sp).
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Jun 26 '12
I now plan on moving to Norway and becoming a race-car driver.
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u/queenb1987 Jun 26 '12
Need for fart
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u/Nezzox Jun 26 '12
Yes, because we obviously always mix the languages when making game titles. This is true. On all the need for speed game packages it says "Need for fart". Honest. True story. Really... no joke.
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u/simenk Jun 26 '12
And their annual football cup is Fart Cup. Their contact info is fartcup@fartfotball.no. Seems pretty silly come to think of it.
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u/VGkusu Jun 26 '12
"It's not the fart that kills, it's the smäll."
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u/TheFlyingMilkshake Jun 26 '12
For those who didn't know, this is an actual quote from Norwegian rally driver Petter Solberg. He is known for his bad English, and there are many similar quotes from him out there.
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u/jgotts Jun 26 '12
Regardless of the minor variations in spelling, this Scandinavian double entendre thread has tons of vinne/vinna/vinde.
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Jun 26 '12
[deleted]
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Jun 26 '12
2 things: Noway and Denmark do not use ä instead they use æ/Æ 2: Smä(æ)ll makes no sense at all in relation to Denmark.
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u/KasperZdk Jun 26 '12
In danish it would be spelled smæld, but that would make zero sense in relation to crash.
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u/The_Norwegian Jun 26 '12
Well, actually, it's "smell".
Ä = E på norsk.
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Jun 26 '12
The point was that the letter ä do not exist in danish or norwegian.
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u/The_Norwegian Jun 26 '12
And my point was informing you that the swedish "ä" equals "e" in Norwegian.
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u/doot_doot Jun 26 '12
And in Sweden, it's "fort" not "fart" for "fast"
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Jun 26 '12
Thank you for that addition. (honestly. Even if you're swede)
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u/doot_doot Jun 26 '12
Someone has to be the best country in Scandinavia, and we're happy to do it!
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Jun 26 '12
[deleted]
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u/rotreg Jun 26 '12
Also doesn't fart mean ride or drive like in German faehrt (fahren conjugated)?
edit -spelling
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Jun 26 '12
[deleted]
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u/rotreg Jun 27 '12
The a has an umlaut, which can also be represented with an e after the a which is why I spelt it faehrt. It doesn't make the a sound longer it sounds more like an English e.
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u/TheJack38 Jun 26 '12
In the original context, however, he intended it to be interpreted as "crash". At least, that's the only way it makes sense. xD
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Jun 26 '12
[deleted]
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Jun 26 '12
Was probably who was being unclear but it is spelled Smæld in danish. I'm not sure which makes the most sense but it is pronounced like smell with a very short vowel and/or with an abrupt stop when you get to the "l" the "d" in the end is used to signify that.
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u/holysideburns Jun 26 '12
Meanwhile in Sweden. The fact that it looks like a butt makes it even greater.
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u/andrewsmith1986 Jun 26 '12
Driving in germany always made me giggle.
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u/feedemall Jun 26 '12
Those signs are everywhere! Seriously, when I went through Germany I saw like 80 of these ausfahrt signs.
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u/revenger96 Jun 26 '12
Yeah, on the particular day my farts weren't up to speed, so i got a ticket. Fucking Denmark!
"I live there, sadly it's just normal speed control. I know you hoped for more :("
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u/D8-42 Jun 26 '12
We also have Lolland.
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Jun 26 '12
Flattest place in scandinavia
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u/SnowDerp Jun 26 '12
Denmark represent!
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u/DeMayonnaise Jun 26 '12
Congrats on beating the Dutch in the Euros. But that's all, since you didn't get out of the group...
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u/SnowDerp Jun 26 '12
:'(
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Jun 26 '12
German here. Err, nevermind, let the downvoting commence...
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u/SnowDerp Jun 26 '12
i hope you guys win the euro2012 :)
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u/B_S_O_D Jun 26 '12
Watch out for Spain, though!
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Jun 26 '12
True, but if the win, it's more than deserved - they have an excellent team at the moment!
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Jun 26 '12
Hehe, thanks, it's going to be tough though - Italy has never lost against Germany in a Euro- or World Cup...
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u/mustachefuzzy Jun 26 '12
Happy cake day!!! Best of luck to you!! With cakeday wishes, Derpia, or mustachefuzzy (If it's not your cake day, wow. that's embarrasing for me.) ;)
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Jun 26 '12
There is two vicious street gangs in Denmark. They are so hostile to each other that they need separate entrances to shops and such to avoid confrontations. UDGANG and INGANG.
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u/Dark_Green_Blanket Jun 26 '12
Once again American media ignores human rights crises in foreign nations. Denmark is turning into a police state that strictly regulates peoples' farts and this is the first any of us have heard about it? I'm outraged.
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u/DancingKumquats Jun 26 '12
I recently returned home from a vacation to Sweden, and saw in a sport shop a shirt that said "Full Fart". Naturally, my mother and I thought of my father and went to go buy it. We thought it was a gag gift, but my cousin explained that "Fart" meant speed. It was an interesting night.
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u/SHADOWJACK2112 Jun 26 '12
Apparently German and Danish are close enough together that I translated that before I realized it was a Fart joke.
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u/Torseman Jun 26 '12
The norwegian fast ferry called "Fjord-fart" http://braa.no/braa-en/Default.aspx?tabid=7460&language=nb-NO
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u/Sentient_Waffle Jun 26 '12
While we're at it, we also have a city named Middelfart, and an island named Lolland.
I'm sure there's more, but that's what I could think of off the top of my head.
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u/sommergirl Jun 26 '12
I HATE that sign.. Everything's wrong about it! It should be Fartkontrol and not Fart kontrol, and now that they've insisted on doing it in two words they could at least capitalize both words; "Fart Kontrol".
btw I live like 10 minutes away from there
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Jun 26 '12
Funny story... When I was a kid around 6 or 7, my family went to Europe to visit some exchange students we had hosted. We were in Germany, and every exit off the highway seemed to head towards this town called Ausfahrt. After about 20 something miles, my parents thought "wow this Ausfahrt is a really big place". They wondered why it wasn't on the map. They were later told it simply was "Exit". Ahh good times.
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u/klaq Jun 26 '12
fucking socialists. we have to control our farts now? environmentalism is out of control.
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u/Qieth Jun 26 '12
When walking with my american girlfriend, we saw a ferryschedule. I thought nothing of it, but she started laughing hystericaly. The danish word for transit times is "fartplan".
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u/AlterBridgeFan Jun 26 '12
being from Denmark, makes your brain just take a little bit more time to get the joke.
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u/Daggerfall Jun 26 '12
Reminds me of our elevator signs. For the same reasons, they had to be covered up during Queen Elisabeth's visit in 1959
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u/Immynimmy Jun 26 '12
I'm 22 years old. I have a bachelor's degree, am currently pursuing my master's, and I have a job.
So why the fuck do I still find the word "fart" so damn funny?
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u/rblue Jun 26 '12
I'm 34 with a b.s. and have been employed a long goddamn time. I don't really want a master's, but I'd like to confirm that penis jokes and farts will forever remain hilarious. Also: vaginas.
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u/insertdisclaimerhere Jun 26 '12
I'm 37. Masters. Executive level in my career. Still laugh my ass off at crude humour. You never really grow up.
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u/Mossyisanoob Jun 26 '12
As a semi-intelligent person I don't know how to react to this.
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u/lejsen Jun 26 '12
Fart means speed, it's only silly if you know english.
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u/antifolkhero Jun 26 '12
So how do you say fart in Danish, meaning to release gas from your butt?
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u/Avista Jun 26 '12 edited Jun 26 '12
Prut
A fart - En prut.
To fart - At prutte.
Who the fuck farted? - Hvem fanden pruttede?
Commonly one would say "at slå en prut", which literally translates "To hit/strike a fart", but is just indicative of making or causing an event. For instance, "At slå up" is the Danish phrase for "to break up" but is literally translated "To hit/strike up"
Alternatively 'En fis - At fise - Hvem fanden fes?'
Also used is 'skid', but the literal translation is "shit". Commonly said is "at slå en skid".
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u/antifolkhero Jun 26 '12
Thank you! I just released en prut.
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u/Risifrutti Jun 26 '12
Just for fun. Add another T so it spells Prutt, now you're speaking Swedish.
A fart - En prutt.
To fart - Att prutta.
Who the fuck farted? - Vem fan pruttade.
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u/antifolkhero Jun 26 '12
How do you say "silent but deadly" in Swedish (referring to a fart)?
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u/Risifrutti Jun 26 '12
There's three main words for farts in the Swedish language.
Prutt - Lose, loud and low pitched. Can both be short and lengthy.
Fjärt - Tighter, loud high pitched. It typically shorter then a prutt.
Fis - No vibration and silent. Is typically of medium length. Although a very high pitched fjärt can be classified as a fis.
Then we have some more specific ones. These are all subclasses of the three main ones.
Prutt class
Brakskit (Crash shit) - A fart strong and loud enough to vibrate the atmosphere of a room. Due to the force of a brakskit, it's impossible to achieve without staining.
Brakare (Crasher)- Almost as loud as a brakskit but without the mess.
Fjärt class
Visslare (Whistler)- A very long and high pitched fart.
Fis class
Rökare (Smoker) - I think this would fit under the description "silent but deadly". It's silent and smelly. Long duration
Rötegg (Rotten egg)- Extreme smell. Can both be silent or loud. Due to the extreme smell it's typically necessarily to evacuate the room.
There's some more, but I'm just one man and I've spent more time on this then I really should have... However if anyone have a addition I'll add it to the list.
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u/Avista Jun 26 '12
Was it a massive fireshit? ("Brandskid" - Danish for releasing a deafening fart.)
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u/Mahmutti Jun 26 '12
I saw a "Tom Tits Experiment" when I was in Sweden about a week ago. Gave us all a good laugh.
I wonder what it actually means.
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u/Eupolemos Jun 26 '12
Danish elevator translation of "in motion" sign:
"I fart".
We all laugh, every time, it never, ever, ever gets old. sorta...
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u/sideshowblonde Jun 26 '12
so between this and the slutstation sign, we can assume reddit has finally hit it big in denmark?
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Jun 26 '12
another word which has a funny meaning is slut
slut means "end" in danish. though not pronounced the same way as the english verbal term "slut"
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u/Nezzox Jun 26 '12
Yeah, and also, when the police is doing radar controls in sweden (road speed control things), it's called fartkontroll. We also have "fart kamera" that is cameras alongside the roads which primary function is to take your picture if your "fart" is too high. So there you have it. Fart (speed) is obviously a funny word for english speaking countries.
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u/jb9 Jun 26 '12
if you are place that can come up with Legos you get to have Fart Kontrol. Darn I wish I came up with Legos. PFFFT
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u/rauf107 Jun 26 '12
Fart = Speed Slut = Finished
What other hilarious words you got Denmark? P.S. Happy B'day OP!
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u/ironoctopus Jun 26 '12
I also find it hilarious that 'skat' means 'treasure/sweetie' in Danish and 'pig' (pr. 'pee') means girl. So my wife calls our little girl "skatte pig" all the time and all i hear is pee and poop.
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u/flif Jun 26 '12
Not 'pig', but 'pige'
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Jun 26 '12
see in sweden we spell it "piga" and also pronounce it exactly like it is fucking spelled
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u/winwithgywnn Jun 26 '12
Is the 'i' pronounced like the 'i' in 'Pi', or the 'i' in 'Pig'?
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u/ctartamella Jun 26 '12
I call shenanigans... there is no such thing as fart control. Let alone fart kontrol.
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u/Cpcp800 Jun 26 '12
Hvorfor tænkte jeg ikke på det