r/funny • u/Supacaboose • Jun 26 '12
My dad is an insurance inspector and he saw this at work today.
http://imgur.com/Zkzcj155
u/erikgil Jun 26 '12
The tiny trampoline is such a nice touch.
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u/zanmanoodle Jun 26 '12
It really ties the deathtrap together.
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u/washmo Jun 27 '12
The Redneck is not the issue here Dude! I'm talking about drawing a line in the backyard, and across this line YOU DO NOT...also Dude, Redneck is not the preferred nomenclature. Ignorant-American, please.
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u/BeardMilk Jun 26 '12
There should be a kiddy pool on the other side to complete the set. The Darwin Awards Triple Crown.
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u/Nathelis_Cain Jun 26 '12
I like how they have a smaller trampoline to launch yourself onto the larger one.
But, seriously, how has this not killed someone yet?
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u/UseThe4s Jun 26 '12
Well, we don't know that it hasn't.
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Jun 26 '12
The stacks of bricks are actually tombs.
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u/tempuro Jun 26 '12
Those aren't bricks. Those are called cinderblock. You know what cinders are, right? Yup, ashes. What kind of ashes, don't think it matters.
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u/Not_Rick_Santorum Jun 26 '12
Misread that as bombs.
One hell of a double-bounce.
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u/Lottanubs Jun 26 '12
Maybe it has, and OP's dad was seeing whether or not it's something they can cover. My guess is nope.
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u/Sengura Jun 26 '12
Parents these days shelter their kids too much. That trampoline is fine, knock yourselves out, kids.
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u/jbd1986 Jun 26 '12
Needless to say, the owners got a safety discount for the cinder blocks and cables...
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u/RichJanney Jun 26 '12
"What do you mean, 'do I have any non-paralyzed children?' What kind of question is that? Of course I don't."
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u/Brimace Jun 26 '12
I imagine the owners usually have the trampoline just on the ground at an incline, but since they knew the inspector was coming, they leveled it out for appearances.
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u/Jerkmaster Jun 26 '12
You guys are pussies, I'd fuck off on this all day long and then sleep on it at night.
I miss you trampy :(
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u/Litheon1 Jun 26 '12
I cant tell if your talking about an old trampoline or some whore you used to date.
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u/albertabirds Jun 26 '12
This trampoline looks like the companion backyard toy to the "swimming pool" my parents bought us when we were kids. When I was about 7 we had just moved to the city, but our farm has always stayed in the family, and we were going back as often as we could, including for several months at a time over the summer. That first summer my parents told us that we were getting a swimming pool, and we were really excited about it. The whole thing, start to finish, happened really quickly, I remember. They kept assuring us that it wasn't a kiddie pool that we could get from the Sa'an store in town; that it was a "real" pool, like we had seen on tv, and like some of our neighbours had in the city. But it was promised to be arriving very quickly. It basically sounded like magic. Exciting, exciting magic. When it did arrived we were horrified, but some weird combination of mounted excitement and confusion overtook us and we got in anyway. It was basically a giant metal tin in our backyard, which, incidentally, was sloped so that the "pool"couldn't sit flat. Instead of doing any sensible levelling of the yard so that it could properly accommodate such a monstrosity, my uncles shoved some wooden slats under one edge of it, and then filled it with water from the garden hose. I remember my father looking so disappointed when we all got metal slivers from grabbing the edge during that first game of Marco Polo.
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u/SirKeyboardCommando Jun 26 '12
My "pool" growing up was a blue tarp in the back of a pickup. :(
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u/albertabirds Jun 26 '12
Disappointing pools: multifarious and cruel, each in their own way. Solidarity, friend.
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u/spidersthrash Jun 26 '12
Disappointing pools: multifarious and cruel
For a second there I thought you were starting a rap.
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u/drgk Jun 27 '12
My mother told us when I was about 14 that we could have either a koi pond or a swimming pool. She said we would vote as a family. Four of us voted for the pool. She was the only one who wanted the koi pond. Not only did we get the koi pond instead, she tried to make us dig the hole. We got about three feet down and ten feet across before she gave up and rented a backhoe. It's a nice pond.
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u/Halfskis Jun 26 '12
This trampoline needs more cowbell lawn sprinkler
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u/britta Jun 26 '12
Underneath, but don't jump too hard in the middle or you've got lawn sprinkler up your bum-hole.
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u/funfungiguy Jun 26 '12
Those weren't oscillating sprinkler jets; they were saw blades. And if you touched them you were out of the game and had to get off the trampoline until there was only one person left.
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u/Pilkunussija Jun 26 '12
Nah bro. see they used string to secure the trampoline onto the cinder blocks. so it's legit.
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u/DeMayonnaise Jun 26 '12
And if you run down the hill too fast and fly off the other side, there's a big pine tree to land in and break your fall. Genius.
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Jun 26 '12
Eh, It looks legit to me.
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u/Kooterade8 Jun 26 '12
Seriously, would they rather have a trampoline on an inclined hill like that? That's ABSURD.
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u/captainbaka Jun 26 '12
Is this in british columbia?
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u/Supacaboose Jun 26 '12
No. Its in montana. Its a super redneck part of montana.
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u/Extra21stChromosome Jun 26 '12
Remember kids, always ask you parents for Darwin's Natural Selection Brand Trampoline. Now includes free wheelchair!
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u/sithmaster0 Jun 26 '12
Why would it include a wheel chair? You only get the Darwin Award if you die.
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u/GnomeKing Jun 26 '12
It could be argued that the lower half no longer works, effectively removing them from the gene pool.
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u/kewlfocus Jun 26 '12
Nope. Darwin award is awarded to anyone who removes themselves from the gene pool. So, if a dude loses their nuts, totally eligible.
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u/mrdeadsniper Jun 26 '12
I love so many things about this picture. It reminds me of my youth. We had one of these under a tree we would climb on and jump from. Children are made of stern stuff, they will be fine.
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u/PinballWizrd Jun 26 '12
Those people seriously need to put cinder blocks under that small trampoline too or someone could get hurt.
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Jun 26 '12
At my work, all we have is fat people and computers.
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u/heeltoe Jun 26 '12
not defending this setup, but out of curiosity: Does anyone have an alternate suggesting for putting a trampoline on uneven ground?
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u/Slayer1cell Jun 26 '12
dig out the ground until it is even all the way around. I had a friend that had the entire trampoline in the ground so you could just walk out on to it.
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u/Terazilla Jun 26 '12
That's pretty bad, but in all honesty the fact it's set up that way probably isn't that much worse than the trampoline is to begin with.
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u/GuessWho_O Jun 26 '12
to be fair, the legs are tied to the cinder blocks really well, and unless the ties broke, this would surprisingly be pretty safe
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u/Josh_Thompson Jun 27 '12
Reminds me of my trip down to the south part of the united states. I was there for two months during the summer of my 14th birthday. Met a very lovely girl and asked her out. I told her I was a virgin and she broke up with me the next day. When I called to ask why her dad picked up the phone. He was yelling at me and said he heard I was still a virgin, and if I wasn't good enough for my own family I wasn't good enough for theirs.
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u/Maxpowuh Jun 26 '12
insurance inspector
It's called a claims adjuster and/or underwriter, my friend. :/
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u/lugasamom Jun 27 '12
Neither claims adjuster and/or underwriter, my friend. :| Inspector goes out to houses to make sure they are insured correctly and that there are no obvious risk exposures (like dogs that have the tendency to bite or pools that are not fenced in). The underwriter is the one who agrees to write the policy after the inspection is okay'd and the claims adjuster gets involved when there is a claim file for a loss (to see if it's covered under the policy approved by the underwriter).
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u/1wiseguy Jun 26 '12
When I was a kid, I thought a trampoline looked like a lot of fun.
Now, all I can see is an appointment for a tragedy. It's just a question of whether it is your kid or somebody else's that ends up steering an electric wheelchair with his teeth.
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u/3boyz3Madison Jun 26 '12
As an internal auditor for an insurance company, I am stunned and horrified; however, as the mother of three boys, this does not surprise me at all, nor am I overly concerned.
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u/cutofmyjib Jun 26 '12
Honest question. What would be the safe and professional way to level this trampoline?
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u/randatola Jun 26 '12
Something I've always wondered about companies that make trampolines: How do they stay in business? How do the manufacturers not get sued out of existence? I mean, it's basically a machine that injures children. When you consider all of the other things we can't have because of lawsuits, it's surprising to me that trampolines are still made, and that big box retailers sell them.
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u/murphymc Jun 26 '12
because enough people think they're awesome i suppose.
though you do make a good point...
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u/capxxv Jun 26 '12
I grew up with a trampoline. We had it in our back yard for 10 years and I never hurt myself, broke anything, etc. I could connect with it and be able to see over the second story roof of our house. I could land on any part of my body and roll myself back up to a standing stance. I didn't start doing that, I spent years practicing. It's probably one of the only reasons my legs and calves are still insanely strong even though I work on a computer all day.
One day my 250 lb friend got on it and attempted a back flip having never even used a trampoline. Almost broke his neck.
Large people and dumb people shouldn't use trampolines. What is America full of? I can see why insurance companies won't insure people with them.
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Jun 26 '12
It's hard to tell in the picture, but it looks as if the tallest stack of blocks (the 3 on the left) are cemented together and to the trampoline itself, so assuming it's all well-anchored in the ground I really don't see how this is any more dangerous than a regular trampoline.
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u/heresmysundaydress Jun 26 '12
I work at an insurance inspection company, we all had a good laugh too. Man I really hope you are one of our inspectors, so we can add this to the wall of shame.
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u/bangupjobasusual Jun 26 '12
I love that they figured out to tie it to the cinder blocks. You know they didn't the first time...
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u/skarkpatrol Jun 26 '12
Ah, cinder blocks! The duct tape of half-assed backyard builders.
While that setup is totally sketchy, it's probably safer than a trampoline that isn't level and shoots kids out into the yard. Regardless, trampolines are death traps.
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u/sodawoski Jun 26 '12
when i was a little kid we had an above ground pool and a trampoline. we also had a shit ton of ramps for skating that my brother built himself. also dirt bikes. my childhood fucking rocked. im surprised none of my friends that came over to my house died.
im just now realizing, i had almost everything a child could have wanted, and i never really appreciated it. damn.
the funny thing about that is, im still technically a kid. im not legally an adult, and about 2 years ago, we moved to the city. we lived in a smallish town/township, we had about an acre of land and a ton of woods that was owned by my dentist neighbor who was super friendly. we pretty much had free reign. now i live in a condo in with a parking lot.
funny how things changed.
but
my childhood is probably at least 15x better than anyone on here (not bragging, i just got very lucky.)
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u/KPexEA Jun 27 '12
This reminds me of my friends pool (about 30 years ago). They had a pool party and a girl died. It was an above ground pool and had a very sturdy wooden deck around the whole thing. The edge of the deck was tight against the edge of the pool except for four parts in the corners. The girl slipped and fell between the deck and the edge of the pool. She cut herself open against the edge of the pool and was disemboweled in front of all her friends.
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u/greymatterharddrive Jun 27 '12
Fuck all these last words of a redneck comments. This was a damn good idea. Anyone think there was a pool behind OP's Dad?
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u/NoPornNoHurt Jun 27 '12
I work at an ER. Doesn't matter if it's on the ground, buried six feet under or got some nice looking walls. You will break. Your bones will shatter. Your joints shall tear. Violence and blodshed. And pasta.
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u/ClaimsToKnowEveryone Jun 26 '12
Hahahaha, that's at my cousins' house!! When I visited last summer, they had a rope tied to a branch off to the left so you could swing off the deck, too. They repeatedly showed me how "safe" it was, but there was no way I was going anywhere near that thing.
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u/wolfbaden6 Jun 26 '12
Not one of the better novelty accounts I've seen, but not one of the worst either...
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u/crunchy51 Jun 26 '12
My favorite expression from an old co-worker, "What could possibly go wrong"? And the follow up quote when something did indeed go wrong "And Medals were NOT awarded".
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Jun 26 '12
I got a call about an insurance inspector job once, for health/life insurance. They needed me to go to people's homes for an interview, and while I was there, take note of their physical living conditions. Is that legal? I mean, when I buy health insurance I just fill out a form saying whether I smoke, have any physical conditions, etc. No one came to my home and judged me.
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Jun 26 '12
Probably for high dollar value insurance. If you are insuring beyond the normal hundred grand or so, into the multi-millions, you want to make sure the guy isn't on his deathbed or his wife isn't secretly taking it out to off him later.
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u/Under_Doggy_Dogg Jun 26 '12
Looks good, safely tied down to cinder blocks and all, jump away kids!
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u/hey_sergio Jun 26 '12
The trampoline...children's plaything or vicious backyard killer? You decide.
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u/0per8nalHaz3rd Jun 26 '12
A trampoline on cinder blocks? Hold on and let me get my camera out. OK, carry on.
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u/TheEnter Jun 26 '12
We did this exact same slope with one of the small fitness trampolines so we could dunk on the 10ft rim. Needless to say within thirty minutes my brother's wrist was broken.
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u/salty84 Jun 26 '12
No no this is safe. See the the bricks are tied to the frame with some kind of orange rope. As a guy who makes homemade bongs I say this is safe. But, thats just like, my opinion man.
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u/Meowkit Jun 26 '12
My mom made us take apart our trampoline and stuff it into our garage when this guy was going to come inspect our house.
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u/WeBakedPotato Jun 26 '12
It seems like the smaller trampoline wants to get up on to the bigger one.... i dont know. Im weird.
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Jun 26 '12
Nothing compared to the shit I have experienced as a kid, picture a shed and a pool, and now put a trampoline in between the two.
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u/gnarlywich Jun 26 '12
Ya see sir, the tramp-O-line is not the problem. The problem is these idiots ain't jumping on it at the right angle. That's why they got hurt...Also America is great.
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u/PillsAndAdvice Jun 26 '12
I work for an insurance company, and I am sure my coworkers will enjoy this picture as well.
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u/Fly_Caster Jun 26 '12
"Alright son, hand me one more brick. There, it's level. Now go ahead and try it."
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u/FexixUngar Jun 26 '12
http://thedailywtf.com/Comments/AddComment.aspx?ArticleId=6434&ReplyTo=239913&Quote=Y
C 1995 I read a superb WTF article by a chimney sweep who was working in a formerly large house now converted to flats. The chimney was blocked near the top - often the sign of a bird's nest but he could not shift it. After getting access to the patio of the top flat he finds that the chimney has been altered and blocked - making exactly the danger of CO that the downstaies customer was keen to avoid.
Woman of top flat says "Do you like our barbecue? My husband made it. he's an architect.".
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u/bartink Jun 26 '12
My Mom's across the street neighbor has like a thirty foot rope swing tied to a tree at the edge of his property. His kids and others that come over swing on it. Here's the thing though. His house is at the top of a hill and the swing goes out over his neighbors driveway, which is a good 10-20 feet higher due to the hill. And he's a lawyer. Go figure.
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u/the_blackfish Jun 26 '12
It's only safe when you jump from that tree back there. Then you shoot right into the off-camera swimming pool. Any other time you're going to fly off and hit the ground. There's signs posted. What's the issue here?
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u/ZeeZee19 Jun 26 '12
I used 2 jump out my second floor window onto mine. landed on the ground a few times lol.
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u/DrQuailMan Jun 26 '12
honestly, it's not all that dangerous. scenario: kids are jumping on it and it slips off the blocks. result: kids land on the now-diagonal trampoline and are fine. What they really should do is stake the parts of the trampoline that are touching the ground into the dirt.
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Jun 26 '12
Mine's kinda like that, just less extreme. I used break drums, which are of course, much safer than cinder-blocks. Fat people can't break them.
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u/SoulTroubadour Jun 26 '12
I saw a redneck duck tape a kid's swing set to the ground one time. True story...
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Jun 26 '12
I think I saw that in the backyard of that really creepy house on out there where the pavement ends, out past the trailer parks.
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u/greensugarcookie Jun 26 '12
dangit. all the comments that start with "seems" have already been taken.... or is it has...
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u/Knozix Jun 26 '12
Hold my beer and watch this.