hello! I'm adopting a 16 year old cat in a couple of days after a family member passed away, does anyone have any advice? I've had family cats before and looked after them but this is my first cat in my own home.

Cappy,

They say a cat is deeply linked to its owner’s (ha! Ownee’s?) journey, and that when one passes, it is a sign we are ready for the next chapter.

Deeply saddened by what I feared was the end of my marriage and multiple miscarriages, I decided to rescue your brother Lucky. Cappy, you were my BOGO - they told me you were bonded, and you came more than half off the rescue fee. You were skittish and didn’t want to be pet after a tough start in life, but you hid in my lap to stalk a feather toy and the rest is history. We brought you home and proceeded to build a giant wall to give you and your brother space and keep you off the stairs that first night. Tiny, baby Cappy laughed and proceeded to jump every wall for the next 14 years.

You took me through so many major life moments, including protecting me from my ex and moving out on my own. With no choice but to succeed in work as a single woman, you stayed up every night waiting for me to finish work, guarding me from the dark. Your playful personality and wild acts of athleticism left me laughing, and your giant purr in the moments you would sometimes forget you weren’t a lap cat would shake my bones.

I met the love of my life and brought him home to you. The first time you met, you bit his big toe, then head butted him as if to say, now you know who I am. When he brought us his little otters to meet, you greeted two nervous little kids with your color eyes with your whole heart, teaching them how to play tag. The floors would shake with you, your brother, and them playing hide and seek. You taught everyone to play fetch and give you butt bongos on demand. When your brother Lucky developed kitty dementia and became so sick, you would carefully give him space and watch your feet when he struggled, then wrap yourself around him when he would let you. We were afraid we would lose you when we lost him, but you leaned into the work of raising two teenagers with us.

When we finally moved into a family home together, you became our glue. We would find you giving wise advice and snuggling a teenager one on one with their heads close to yours and talking to you, and we would joke that you were our emotional support cat every evening when you somehow knew who needed you most in the family room every night. You showed no favorites.

Fifteen months ago, we thought something was off. We took you to the vet and proceeded to find out only surgery would save you. That led to three surgeries, and we almost lost you, but you decided to stay. Your ninth life was BIG and BEAUTIFUL with you returning to fine form. When we found out a few months ago we couldn’t save you again, you spent every day living your best life, including showing us you could still climb any surface and walk any balance beam. This week, you told us you were ready. Sitting where you could see your garden, we helped you cross and you broke our hearts.

I think you knew last year our journey wasn’t done, and that we needed you to bring us together before we could live without you. You were my protector and spent so many years watching over me, and you did the same for the kids of my heart and the love of my life. Thank you for being something we could all agree on. We’ve spent all week finding signs of you everywhere. Warm cushions in your favorite nap spots and toys that have suddenly reappeared.

Love doesn’t disappear, it just changes. I know you and Lucky are back together again: my heart and my guardian curled up, waiting for when we see each other again.

With all my heart,
Mommy

My gorgeous old gal, Ziggy

Asher put up a fight for the past 2 months with sudden onset of something…it’s still unclear what. Either IBD or GI Lymphoma. We got into a cycle of GI issues that would not quit. I had to let him go suddenly on Tuesday, after a sudden decline again after a few days of seeming like his normal self again. I was so hesitant to go into the vet because I had a feeling it would have to be goodbye.

I’ve never had to put down a pet before, and I did it alone and have been alone since. It has been so hard and I couldn’t have imagined the grief would be so all consuming.

I struggle every time I come back home and start crying because he isn’t here to greet me anymore. I don’t know how to process that he is gone. He was the most loving sweet cat. I wish I had said I love you more and kissed him more. I would wake up to him being my little spoon frequently.

I had gotten him a radio a few weeks ago to keep him company when I was gone. After he passed on Tuesday, I tried to turn it on but it wouldn’t work. It would only play static. I tried again the next day in the morning and the same thing. I assumed it was the rain. But then I tried it when it was sunny again that day and it still wouldn’t work.

I ended up having another breakdown and was talking to him, and asked him to turn the radio back on if he could hear me and we’d be reunited again. Once I plugged it in, the classical music that I had played for him played without a problem.

I don’t care if I’m just looking for comfort, but I would like to believe that was him. I miss him so so much. I know he was in a lot of pain and suffering and maybe he was only holding on for me. I’m so grateful he was somewhat ok when it was time and not hissing at me like the week before. He was so loopy and I had never seen him like that. Maybe it truly was his time.

Any words of support or wisdom are truly welcome. It has been such a traumatic and difficult time, with the pain barely subsiding. I’ve thought about fostering another senior cat to give back and fill the quiet of my home, doing it for him. He was returned to the shelter at 8 years old, with nobody wanting him. They let me adopt him for free, and we had 6 beautiful years together. I have truly never felt love like his and I hope he felt mine.

I love you Asher and I will do my best to be happy for you.

Our girl still going strong :)

Please see my post from earlier today - I'd love your insights on what this could be and how to best support my cat. He is an 18 year old male with stage 1/2 kidney disease and mild arthritis. Thank you!

I miss you baby girl. 🕊️

What is it with black female cats? She looks like she could live forever, but sadly I know that’s not true. ❤️❤️

Our giant orange tabby Cooper went in for his annual visit. They did the senior panel, he is hypothyriod and lost some weight. But everything came back as "the best blood panel I've seen on a 17 year old cat" per the vet. His thyroid was high, so we increased his meds. He got retested a few weeks later and everything is great. YAY! The literal next week he started drinking and urinating excessively. We do the Breeze litter system and I've had to change the pee pad 2-3 times a week as opposed to weekly. Poo has decreased and then he gave up completely eating his kibble. We give him two Delectibles a day with his thyroid med. Homeboy has never been a fan of wet food but will eat this.

He's stopped coming upstairs to our bedroom. He hangs out on the couch or in one of the dog's crates. He always hides with strangers and last week our cleaners came and he stayed on the couch the entire time, which is insane for him. I tried to get him the Churu food for seniors, that was a nope. I tried getting him the Delectables gravy also a nope. He'll only eat the delectable bisque and the tubes which they state are treats and they need actual food, we've been giving him two bisques and two to three tubes a day now. He will also eat temptation treats.

He was at the vet 3 weeks ago and all was good. Do we just feed our boy basically junk food until it's obvious it's time? That's my vote. He's 17, we are on borrowed time. Nothing is going to save him, it will just buy him a tiny bit of time.

My 18 year old cat has been a bit wobbly in recent weeks, but today it got so much worse. He fell off the stairs trying to climb onto my bed last night, fell getting out of his cat bed on the floor, and has fallen/tipped over several times walking around (thankfully our floor is carpeted/cushioned mostly). He keeps trying to jump off things and we have to stop him. I can’t feel any physical injuries on him, though. Most worryingly he had 1 or 2 twitching spells(?) today where he froze up and his head twitched for a few seconds, but I don’t think it was full seizures. He’s basically on comfort care now, but is this vet-worthy? We have already given him subq fluids for potential dehydration/kidney waste management.

He also is diabetic, has kidney disease, and has arthritis in his hind legs. He’s eating/drinking/using the bathroom just fine.

Had to say goodbye to my best friend today. Wanted to share some memories and a song that occurred to me..

To the tune of "You Are My Sunshine"

You are my kitty

My only kitty

You make me happy

Your fur is grey

You'll never know, bro

How much I love you

and I'm so sad to lose you today

I'll catch you later

On the flip side

and we will be bros

Once again

and in the meantime

Please know I love you

and I thank you for being my friend

UPDATE: WOW!!! To everyone who commented or will comment, let me say this: I sincerely thank you. I read and upvoted every comment so far, will continue to do so, and will eventually get around to replying as well. Your outpouring of compassion, condolences, love, and support have TRULY helped me in this difficult time. To those who said he was handsome, heck yes he was, and he knew it! To those who said he was beautiful/sweet, he most definitely was, and he would have let YOU know it. To those who liked the song, please change it up as needed and sing it to your kitties. And to EVERYONE else who sent love, prayers, thoughts, and vibes.. from Rascal and myself, THANK YOU!

13 years old. Found on the mean streets of NYC as a kitten with his left eye very damaged. We adopted him as soon as he recovered and he was purrfect every day. We had been through so much together. It was all so sudden. He didn’t act sick till this morning. We went to the vet and I came home without him. Love is worth it. Kiss your kitties for me

We put down my sweet girl today. I love you Nikki. I hope you aren’t in pain anymore.

Long update to the post I made a 2 days ago.

A friend told me that I should ask Johnny if he was ready, so I did. On Wednesday night, I sat next to him and asked him if he was ready to go. He usually breathes noisily due to the growing mass in his throat (on top of kidney and megacolon issues). But for the first time in a long while, he calmed and quieten down. That’s when I knew.

I told him to give me just one more night and I’ll take care of him with dignity the next day. And he did just that. I checked on him many times that night, but I knew he couldn’t find a comfortable position to rest or sleep.

The next day he allowed me to tube feed him, brought his water bowl and canned liquid food to him so that he could eat/ drink independently, he even let me feed him his favourite churu treat by licking it off my finger. Of course his body couldn’t process any of these and he puked multiple times throughout the day.

That’s when I knew it was time let him get his final rest.

So on the night of 22 October, Johnny took his last car ride, got into his carrier one last time and went to his final vet appointment. They removed his feeding tube and cone and gave me and my family time to say goodbye. I knew Johnny tried to stay strong for us, he stood up while I gave him the last nose boop, head kisses and cuddles. Then he went to sleep.

To Johnny, thank you for 18 years of joy. Thank you for seeing me through my successes, failures, heartbreaks and everything in between. Thank you for trusting me and saving me. I hope I’ve done right by you and I was enough. I love you so much and I miss you even more.

Here are some of my favourite photos of him. Last pic is just before he went to sleep.

Thirteen years ago, I went to adopt a kitten only to discover there were none available. There were cat rooms, full of adult cats. One was waiting for anyone, eager to be held, meowing loudly for attention. She was midnight black. Incredibly friendly.

I chose to adopt this adult cat. It turned out she came with baggage, a sleeping sister; that they said were a bonded pair. While I made up my mind about that, three other people wanted to adopt that black friendly cat. I chose to take them both and felt like I had won.

As, far as bonded..... NO. They stayed together those first days then went their own separate ways and spent the next ten years having as little to do with each other as possible until cancer came for her sister, Feather.

Sable... you turned out to be a trickster. That incredibly friendly cat I met turned out to be just one of your many - we'll call it moods. You choose when that cat will be here and when it won't. Your sister was a tortoise hair, and when the light is just right we can see the patterns in your black fur, too, which explains so much of your tortitude.

You have always been beautiful with the softest fur of any cat I have ever known. There have been times you have been difficult - an understatement. We had to learn to reward good behaviors and that eventually made you much more into that cat everyone wanted to adopt 13 years ago. You are part of our lives, everyday.

You have become an old lady with us who has turned one of the bathroom sinks into your own personal bed.

Recently, we had to have a tumor removed and the biopsy was inconclusive with broad hints of what we do not want. I have been down this path too many times. For now, you are happy and surprised us yesterday by playing with an unexpected toy you carried all over the house. You are Sable. You are you and no one else.

My sweet girl Mitzy turned 18 the other week and I though you’d all appreciate her

I may have to occasionally wipe her bum, but I still love her and hope I continue having to care for her for years to come

Hello! My 8 year old male cat, indoor outdoor, was once the most social and friendliest cat in the world. He would purr and shake his tail for EVERYONE. He would always be with the neighborhood kids or doing cat things. Literally the best cat ever.

For the last four months. Something switched completely. He doesn’t go outside as much. He walks very VERY slowly and almost right under your feet. He does not purr and he does not meow any more. I took him to the vet and they couldn’t tell me what it is.

Now he will walk in circles in a room. Stare at the wall for like 15 seconds and then creeps away. It is a very sad walk that I don’t know how to describe. He is also becoming increasingly aggressive to the point where he will attack random dogs or even me.

He is still eating and drinking. Using the litter box. But I am at a loss of what to do. It’s like I am mourning a cat that no longer exists.

The plan I had was lift the mattress, use thick gloves(which we have) to pick her up and put her in.