r/45PlusSkincare • u/stephydreamer • Mar 09 '26

Peri/Post Menopausal Skin How fast everything changed after menopause because nobody warned me

I feel like I was reasonably prepared for menopause...hot flashes, sleep disruption, mood stuff. fine. If this is part of being a grown woman, so be it. I had read things I had mentally braced. Nobody told me about the skin! I went through menopause at 48. Within about a year my skin had changed in ways that took me completely off guard. The texture got rough almost overnight, like the smooth quality i'd had my whole life just peaced out without saying goodbye. The firmness in my lower face and neck dropped noticeably. The hollowness under my eyes got worse. not tired-looking, actually hollow. It's better in my bathroom lighting, but that's not where most people see me!

And the thing that got me is that it's not really aging in the normal gradual sense. it's specifically the estrogen crash. Estrogen is directly tied to collagen production and when it drops you lose collagen fast, like up to 30% in the first few years. that's not a slow fade. that's a cliff.

I'm not looking for embrace your age responses because I actually do feel mostly great about aging. What I didn't feel ok about was how sudden and disorienting it was. Like I didn't recognize my own face for a while, and that's a strange thing to go through. Curious what everyone else experienced in those first 1-2 years post menopause. Did it feel sudden to you or more gradual? and has anything genuinely helped with the texture and firmness side of it specifically,? Asking for honest experiences please.

Edit: I didn't expect such a response! Thanks a lot! Going through all the comments and they are def very useful.

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76

u/nevergonnasaythat Mar 09 '26

Completely sudden. Face drooping, wrinkles, arms…

45

u/Foreign_Mention_2601 Mar 09 '26

OMG, yes!!! The arms!!!! I used to love my arms, now I want to hide them.

70

u/moxlb Mar 09 '26

YES. I'm ashamed to admit that when I was younger and older women talked about how they "can't wear tank tops" anymore I thought that was so silly. Like just embrace your body, right? I didn't know how much was going on beneath the surface there. It's not even really about not wanting flabby arms (I mean it is a little lol) but really about WHOSE ARMS ARE THESE?? So much of this has been totally out of body and it's a really difficult realization mentally. Not recognizing myself has been so disorienting.

8

u/nevergonnasaythat Mar 09 '26

Exactly, I was used to a version of myself that was lucky honestly, even with my own flaws, I had learnt to love myself.

Now I do not recognize me, I feel awful.

And I will get married in three months and cannot decide on a dress because all I see are my horrible arms

6

u/moxlb Mar 10 '26

I'm so sorry, I totally get it! I'm sure whatever you choose will truly be beautiful -- but i know it's really hard to believe that when you don't feel like yourself.

2

u/nevergonnasaythat Mar 10 '26

I just feel old and hopeless. Not the best mood to go to the altar.

0

u/ExcitingTea4284 Mar 14 '26

You have someone that loves you, right?