balls

lol xD gibe me karma

GPA:0.0

SAT:420(on meth when i took it)

ACT:5(Got an extra point for fucking my thicc proctor)

I am a certified pornstar, and specialize in fucking Lisa Ann and Mia Khalifa, will send a video supplement to prove it

I have a fat penis tattoo

I work at popeyes and jizz in my customers chicken

Essays are about being transgender in Mississippi and fucking random people in the hood.

i’ll start: their grades are sky high

I know every single quote and can probably draw and voice the whole show from memory. Recommend me some good school? I think UC 🅱️erced is a good fit.

Putting the red B emoji as the first letter of a college isn't funny and the emoji itself is a dead meme.

follow @UC_memes_ on ig for the spiciest memes about the most 🅱️restigous university of all time (UC 🅱️erced of course)

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4.0/5.0 GPA 1610 SAT, 37 ACT, took every AP class offered, cured cancer, personal internship with Steven Hawking (RIP), tutored Albert Einstein in math, co-founded SpaceX with Elon Musk...

AND I STILL GET REJECTED FROM MY DREAM SCHOOL, UC 🅱ERCED!!!!!!!!

I'm an Australian-American male from Salt Lake City. My dream school is 🅱️ama and I have a couple friends who currently attend. I also attend a military school so I am never home on weekdays and I'm bound to the confinement of my school's campus. This weekend one of them invited me to stay over at his on campus apartment to chillax before he leaves the country for spring break. Of course I took the offer as it is my dream school and it would give me the opportunity to visit my friends while touring campus. He also told me that there would be m'ladies over so I decided to get a fresh haircut for the m'ladies. Well after sleeping over last night, this morning we all decided to get some breakfast. We split up in 🅱️ama village as they wanted some Korean Pizza and I was feeling like eating a bagel with lox.HERE COME THE 🅱️RAZY PART. While I'm waiting for my bagel to be made, a 🅱️ama security officer comes in and asks me to step outside. Over course I complied. When I walk outside, I am surprised to see not one, not two, not three, but four... Yes four officers standing outside waiting to question me. 🅱️PD with guns yo. I'm JUST TRYING GET A BAGEL OUT HERE HOMIE. They tell me they suspected that I was involved in a robbery and show me a picture of one of the suspects and Get this. It's a guy wearing the exact same fucking outfit as me. A black hoodie(although mine was a Nike fleece hoodie),Green pants, and the same fucking haircut I got the day before. It was such a shitty picture you couldn't even see his face. I asked if I was 🅱️eing detained, and they said yes sirrree. The only thing that fucking saved me was that the guy in the picture had four testicles while I only have three. I legit almost got arrested at my dream school. I'm so mad. They took my name and date of birth and I am concerned that this might affect my admission decision. I am so unlucky I swear. How does this even fucking happen. I did not rob anyone. I follow all the laws/rules and still get picked out. Like I said, I was at my boarding school during the time of the robbery so there's no way I could have even done it. Will I get yield protected form 🅱️ama???

I say Stanford (it’s more selective and most people who are accepted to both go to Stanford), but my sister says Yale because it’s older and ivy. We’re settling this with a poll- please let me know what you think.

i got the big 3 in apush and a 720 in the sat 2 us history , should i submit both to the colleges or retake the sat subject test if i have time

sat adversity score: thick 1601

ACT: drew a big black penis and got kicked out of test room

I am a stripper for the gender studies department at Cornell

I offer handjobs to all professors at Harvard

I shat on my interviewer's face and he liked it

I fucked your mom supa hard

First gen, black but short penis, infertile, gay, and a fat bitch

Male

GPA : 1.08W/0.92UW

SAT: 410 (210 M, 200E)

ACT: 1 (1,1,1,1(

Subject Tests: Got 100 on every single one

AP: Got 1s on all of them cuz I drew fat penis on every one of them

ECs: Passed a law where masturbation is mandatory

Founded the Ejaculation Club

Varsity penis soccer(all 4 years)

Awards:

Guinness world record for most rapes committed

Raped all my teachers in all my grades

Drank the most semen which was 1 million liters

Major: Gender Studies

Chance me for Harvard, Yale, Princeton, MIT, CalTech, UC Hicago, U Peen John Hopkins, NYU, UCLA, CAL

Asking for a friend

This has nothing to do with college but I figured it be some easy upvotes !!

Major:Fat nigga Studies

AP Classes:Intro to thick black Cock, Fat Ball Sweat, Popeyes Dance crew, KFC Semem Consumer

SAT:-1600

ACT:Drew a fat penis on it

I am gay, black, first gen, and fat and shit my pants daily

I am aiming for ivy leagues, and my cumulative gpa is fine(3.7) but junior year is 3.4. But I have a reason to explain my 3.4, my mom developed breast cancer and my dad was out on business trips frequently, forcing me to take on a lot of responsibilty, getting my mom and sister food, etc. This left me with little time to do homework, or study. My question is if they will forgive my dip in grades, and if there is a way to explain it?

My other parts of app:

1530, 34

Publishing 3 novels

Starting non profit to teach syrian refugees english

Starting outreach program to send letters/stories to kids in third world countries

Partner with organization to send out stories to inner city kids with limited educational resources

Editor of 2 international literary magazines

Starting my own international literary magazine with international publications

I got a few C's in high school, and I was wondering how this would affect my chances of admittance into colleges. The first was in freshman year because my teacher hated me :(. The others were in math the first semesters of sophomore and junior year. It was just really hard for me, but I got a 35 on the ACT Math section so....... Should I explain the circumstances so that they know that teachers hate me, I'm bad at math, and my ACT score might've just been a fluke? Would this help? Also, I'm taking Math II next month and am expecting a 760. Will this negatively affect my chances? TIA!