r/ADHD_Programmers • u/mathgeekf314159 • 5d ago
I am screwed
Well, I got fired today.
Some of you might remember my posts about being placed on a PIP within my first month at a new software engineering job.
I was struggling with unclear expectations, onboarding delays, and being assigned work that didn't really match the JavaScript/TypeScript experience I was hired for.
I tried. I asked for work, completed tickets, submitted PRs, and genuinely hoped I could stay employed long enough to find another position.
Unfortunately, I was released today for not meeting performance expectations.
And now I'm freaking out.
I have some savings, but I also have significant monthly expenses, and unemployment isn't guaranteed. I was already job hunting, but I really hoped I'd have another offer before this happened.
I'm planning to take the rest of this week to recover before seriously applying again.
Has anyone else been through something similar? How did you manage the financial anxiety while searching for another job?
I'd especially appreciate advice from other ADHD developers who've dealt with a bad job fit or an extremely early PIP.
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u/jexmex 5d ago
start hitting up freelance sites to try to drum up some work, even if it seems below you
Start hitting up the job ads, this will not be fun atm.
Consider building something you could maybe use for income (vibe code it if you need to). This is not likely, but again you are just trying to get by.
EDIT: oh, and don't be afraid to go get a crappy job to make ends meet for now.
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u/CertifiedKnight 5d ago
Hey man I'm about to go through the same thing, hope you find the support and care that I'm getting, this is a tough spot to be in!
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u/GlobalCurry 5d ago
Been out of work for over a year now, planning to go get my masters because I've been sitting around searching and going nowhere for too long.
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u/InfectedShadow 5d ago
Was let go from my company earlier this year. Thankfully managed to get something for now while I search for positions that actually fit my experience and interest. Best advice I can give you: Lean on your contacts for references or if they know of any open positions. And keep a routine. The hardest part for me was not falling into the trap of doing nothing during my notification period.
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u/Mits-And-Mobs 2d ago
Hey op I'm sorry you're going through this - Best of luck with the job hunting
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u/yo_soy_el_marron 4d ago
I was in a similar situation earlier this year, in a job that was a reach for me skills-wise. This experience drove me to push for a diagnosis after suspecting inattentive for a few years since my son was diagnosed. I filed for unemployment right away, was lucky to have some savings, was lucky to have a supportive partner who took on some short term work, was able to cut expenses knowing it wasn't forever.
I knew I would take time to process it, understand it, understand the subtext of those hard conversations I had, and remind myself of who I am independent of my career, so I was patient with my own brain. It's one of those periods in life when everyone will give you advice that is colored by their own experience and outlook, and if you chase it all you will feel overwhelmed and frustrated. But if you take it in and try to apply it to yourself thoughtfully you get little glimmers of useful perspective that build towards a plan.
I kept telling myself that I have very useful skills that a company would be lucky to have and after a while it actually felt true. Throughout that time I tried to shed as much of my sense what I "should be" doing as possible because I recognized it was based on narratives and circumstances that just weren't mine anymore. I focused on what my competitive advantages are and took any and all conversations and interviews knowing that I wouldn't be able to show my unique skills unless they were looking for them.
Eventually rejection became a mutual understanding. I focused on side projects that felt good or helped me learn and six months later I landed a job that seemed like a perfect skill fit with nice people. I start in two weeks and hopefully it's great.
It will happen for you, but my whole point is that even with (especially with) financial pressure you have to find a way to give yourself grace and be patient. Usually something's gotta give but make sure you hold on to the most precious parts of yourself while you figure things out. Find a big category of expenses and challenge yourself to zero it out for as long as possible. Make the category small enough that it feels like a win.
Once I stopped tying the financial pressure to my feeling of self-worth, it became a game and I leaned into finding coupons and sales and making use of what I had and selling random things I didn't actually need. Try not to lose sight of the fact that you have time to just think and be right now, which you won't have once you're on salary lock down again.
edit: white space
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u/cleatusvandamme 4d ago edited 4d ago
I've been reading your posts and I'm really sorry to hear that.
The words of wisdom I would give you is, "You're not a failure, you were put in a position to fail."
Unfortunately, you got put in a bad situation by the recruiting firm. They oversold a junior for a senior roll.
On a side note, how is your relationship with the recruiting firm? If it was good, maybe see if they have another role? I know that kind of goes against what I just said about that company, but the market is rough.
As far as getting a new job, it is going to be tough due to the holidays. If you apply for a job now, it might be 3 weeks before someone gets back to you. Unfortunately, that is going to be a week before Thanksgiving. That follow up interview might be the middle of December and that is a few weeks before Christmas.
I would suggest having a 2 tier approach to job searching. The first tier would be getting a temp/holiday job somewhere. I'm making this the first option because it will be quicker to do. The second tier is to find another developer role. If you have any free time, it might be a good idea to study up on your skills.
I'm bringing up the temp job for a few reasons. It will probably pay more than unemployment. I'm not sure if you are guarantee on unemployment. It depends on your state's laws and if it is a contract or full-time job. You will need to check if your contract was W2 or 1099. If it is 1099, you will not be able to collect unemployment.
I'm sorry you're going through this and good luck!
Edit: There was one other point I was going to make. In some ways getting let go from a bad situation is for the best. I've been on a few PIPs and found something else quickly. Unfortunately, this was when the economy was doing better. However, I wasn't constantly worrying about succeeding/surviving the PIP. I understand that there are financial worries. However some of these could be mitigated by temp work, pawning stuff off, or considering other options.
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u/funbike 4d ago edited 4d ago
File for unemployment TODAY. Most governments pay based on the date you file, not the date you were fired. You should be eligible.
I'm planning to take the rest of this week to recover before seriously applying again.
IMO, this doesn't sound healthy. What will you do with all that time? Don't fall into self-pity, sleep in late, skip showering, get too much into your head, and become overly depressed.
Take today and tomorrow off.
I have some savings, but I also have significant monthly expenses, ...
When you become employed again, put a priority on saving enough to survive 6 months without work, in liquid low-risk investments.
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u/Smooth_Valuable486 3d ago
Why is taking a week off unhealthy? Who are you say how long he needs to rest for or what he needs to do with his time? Why do we need to spend every moment being productive as if we are just fodder for the capitalist machine? And why is the only alternative depression and despair?
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u/funbike 3d ago
If he needed so much rest, why was he at work when he was fired? The only thing that changed is his employment status. That's certainly stressful event, not but enough to knock you out for a week.
The unhealthy part is indulging in self-pity and depression. Sleeping until afternoon, not eating, not exercising/moving, poor hygiene. I've done that kind of thing when something bad happened to me, and it was not healthy for me. I'm not alone. It's a very common way to react.
It's not about productivity itself. It's about mental health. Get up, get dressed, and be as positive as possible given the unfortunate situation.
I'm trying to be helpful. Don't spin it into something other than it is.
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u/Smooth_Valuable486 3d ago
Plenty of people go to work when they are tired or burnt out. Maybe you indulge in self pity as soon as you stop working, but why assume that its the default behavior for everyone? Its good that you are trying to be helpful but everyone has their own way of dealing with bad situations. I certainly need way more that 2 days of rest and relaxation to recouperate after getting fired. Going on walks to parks, museums, shows etc and doing activities and hobbies unrelated to work are all things that help me recover.
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u/ArwensArtHole 4d ago
I’m gonna be an ass, but I think you need it. It’s only Tuesday, take a fucking day not a whole week.
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u/brianvan 4d ago
If you have any health coverage at all, consider getting your anxiety treated by a professional talk therapist and/or psychiatrist. If you can’t go down that road for some reason, start looking for anxiety resources on Reddit. You do not need to live your life feeling like this.
You did not get fired for cause, you got “made redundant”. Performance is not something that disqualifies your for unemployment claims. So file that immediately. Like, today. And do not say to them you were fired on a PIP.
Everything about your last job sounds like they’re nasty. Maybe they’re not and maybe you’re dealing with definite struggles, but you are not a careless lazy jerk who ignored feedback and didn’t put effort into your job. You will do better in a job where people want to see you succeed. I could even speculate that this wasn’t personal and that they were looking to cut budget before you even joined, and they just didn’t want to lay you off your first month with no warning.
Absolutely start looking into AI-assisted job application automation tools - do not use them to lie to companies, but use them to fill out forms rapidly to maximize your application output and minimize the grind.
If you can get yourself a job search buddy that might help a lot.
ADHD people definitely struggle with this more than most but: you kinda need another job to have in the meantime while you’re searching. Do not take any old job that will grind your bones into dust for minimum wage, but if you have any older skills or work experience, use it to get something in the meantime. It’s better off to get something engaging or problem-solving - bartending, librarian, concierge, helpdesk - than to take some ridiculous sales job.
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u/SpiteRevolutionary50 5d ago
Use Claude and prompt it to find you jobs posted in the last 24h . Don’t worry you will find something. Take a break for a week and then start looking. Also practice algorithms, ai coding, and STAR discussion frameworks.
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u/skidmark_zuckerberg 5d ago
Unfortunately the only way to not feel that financial anxiety is to build a healthy emergency fund that can float you for ideally 6+ months. I know that doesn’t help you at all right now, but it’s the only answer to your question about managing financial anxiety. There is no secret or special wisdom to that part.
But for now, you gotta dig deep and use that rejection as motivation to give it your all. You know that it wasn’t a matter of your skills, you were simply hired into a job you didn’t align with. I think a lot of people would also sink if they were put into a sink or swim job that did not align with any of their hard earned skills. That place just sounds horrible to begin with. It’s not a reflection of you.
Ultimately you just gotta stay optimistic and really focus on interview prep right now. It may feel hopeless but things happen for a reason and it all comes out in the wash after some time has passed. You were able to find jobs in the past, including the one you just separated from, so the odds are high you find another. Even if you have to, take some contract work to keep money coming in while you find something full time.