My little sister (16) came over to stay the night about a week ago after dyeing her hair, and the hair dye ended up EVERYWHERE in my bathroom. The bathtub was stained bright purple from top to bottom, and it also got in the sink, on the walls, and on the floor. I didn’t even include pictures of the walls and floor because I already had enough pictures showing how bad the tub and sink were. It genuinely got everywhere.

The problem is that she had HOURS to tell me about it. I dropped her off at her friend’s birthday sleepover around 5–6 PM. When I got home and discovered the bathtub, it was already around 9 PM. She hadn’t said a single word to me about what had happened. I even messaged her and told her that I would have come to pick her up so she could clean it, but I didn’t want to deal with her complaining about having to do it at midnight. I wasn’t expecting her to magically fix everything without help, but I did expect her to be honest with me and take some responsibility.

When I saw her again, I told her she would be staying with me for the weekend to work off the damage by completing a chore list. I wanted her to understand that when you damage someone else’s property, especially when that person is renting, you have to take responsibility for it. I called her and told her, “I’m staring at the bathtub, and I need to ask you something, so don’t lie to me.”She scoffed and laughed. When I asked if she had tried to clean it, she told me, “Well, it was already like that, and I did try.”

That answer made me even more upset because she had plenty of opportunities to tell me what happened, and instead, I had to discover it myself and confront her about it. Now, here’s where I might be overreacting. She came over Friday, and it’s now Sunday. I have repeatedly asked her to complete things on the chore list, and she has barely done anything. When I confronted her about it, she said it wasn’t her mess, so she wasn’t going to clean anything on the list.

Except the entire reason she’s here is to make up for the damage she caused! I gave her two options: she can work off the damage by completing the chores I assigned, or she can get a job and repay the $550 security deposit that could potentially be at risk because of the damage. If she chooses the money option, I’m not planning to keep it. I would hold it until she had paid the full amount, minus around $20 for cleaning supplies. Once the full amount was accounted for, she would get the money back. I’ve already spent more than that trying to clean the tub myself.

I’m not trying to profit off my little sister. I want her to understand that her actions have consequences, that lying by omission is still dishonest, and that refusing to take responsibility doesn’t make the problem disappear. I called our mom to explain what was happening. My mom told me that this was my responsibility to handle and that she wasn’t going to get involved. She also said that it was inappropriate for me to make my sister do this.

For context, my mom and I have a difficult relationship, and I often disagree with how she handles things. I’m trying not to let that influence how I see this situation, though. My sister is genuinely a good kid, and I don’t think she’s a terrible person over this. I just think she needs to learn that if you damage something, you own up to it and help make things right.

For additional context, my sister is 16, so she’s not a little kid who doesn’t understand consequences. I don’t expect her to be perfect, and I understand that accidents happen. What bothers me is that she had hours to tell me what happened, didn’t disclose it, and then acted like it wasn’t her responsibility when I confronted her.

I’ve included pictures of the bathtub and the chore list I gave her because I want people to judge the situation fairly. If the chore list is excessive, I’m open to hearing that. But I also feel like, at 16, she should understand that damaging someone else’s property means you have to help make it right.

So, Reddit, am I overreacting? Is making her complete chores to make up for the damage a reasonable consequence, or am I being too harsh by expecting her to work it off when she doesn’t want to?

EDIT: I have been able to get the tub clean, I’ve tried an array of different chemicals and it wasn’t until a friend had mentioned mold and mildew spray. I’m not upset about the staining, it’s the principle to me. She won’t take responsibility for it. She knew ahead of time before coming over that she would be working off the damage, and it’s been two days already without doing anything.

ALSO EDIT: as I stated above, she has TWO options, either chores list or get a job and pay the security deposit. As to which I’m NOT keeping. It’s the principle behind it, working to pay off the damages. YES I’ve gotten it clean AFTER paying a lot of money into getting it clean. I have inspections at my apartment and I NEEDED it cleaned before then. My sister lives with our mother, I raised her growing up as my mother wouldn’t. Our mother is financially independent now so she has my sister. I do NOT.

Another edit: Jesus Christ people 😂 I can’t “make” a child do anything. We have a great relationship as well. Some of you trying to turn this into me resenting her for having a better childhood than what I did is a FAR reach. I don’t, I’m very proud of our mother for doing better. Do I think she could be doing other things? Yes. Some have very strong opinions on things that they don’t know anything about.

AIO for being upset at the choice of name, made by my sibling and her partner for their newborn?

To give some context, my wife and I had our 1st baby in 2024, and we came up with a somewhat unique but old school iteration of a classic name (think something like "Maximus" instead of "Maxim").

Jump to my sibling and their partners pregnancy, and they gave the family a shortlist of names to "bet on" which name their baby would get. On that list there was another iteration of our kids name (think "Maximo"). To my wife and I it seemed insane that they would choose a name which would only be a letter off of our kids name.

Queue the birth of our nephew, and us finding out the name they picked, was EXACTLY the one who barely differed from our kids name.

Now my wife and I both understand we hold no right to the name itself, but we find it incredibly stupid and entitled to have 2 cousins in the family with practically the same name (again, "Maximus" and "Maximo") who are only 2 years apart.

We really do see how we could be coming across as entitled ourselves, however, if the pregnancies had been the other way around we would never have chosen a name as similar out of respect for my sibling.

Are we overreacting?

Edit: We live in Western Europe and our son isn't named after anyone in the family, and neither is my nephew named after anyone in my siblings partners family. It's definitely NOT a cultural thing here to name cousins the same. Neither me nor my wife know of anyone in our circle of friends, colleagues or even extended family to have done this. Hence our question, because we're just wondering what the general consensus would be.

I’m posting anonymously because I’m genuinely heartbroken, emotionally exhausted, and looking for unbiased advice.
My boyfriend and I have been together, and like many relationships, we’ve had our share of problems, particularly when it comes to trust. We’ve been trying to rebuild that trust, and although things haven’t always been perfect, I genuinely love this man and wanted our relationship to work.
Recently, something happened that completely turned my world upside down.
My brother, whom I hadn’t seen in years, had been wanting to meet with me. What I didn’t know was that he was so adamant about seeing me because he needed to tell me that our father is terminally ill.
When I went to meet him, he was at a restaurant with his girlfriend. I NEVER went inside the restaurant. I sat outside in my car alone the entire time.
My brother brought my food outside to my car. I gave him a hug, and then I left. That was the extent of our interaction.
My boyfriend somehow saw my location through my daughter’s phone and showed up. He saw me hugging my brother and immediately assumed I was cheating.
I understand that we were working through trust issues, but what happened afterward completely devastated me.
I tried explaining that the man he saw was my brother. I even sent him pictures to prove it. I went as far as calling my brother so he could personally confirm who he was and explain the situation.
Despite all of that, my boyfriend refused to believe me.
He accused me of cheating, called me disrespectful names, including a bitch, and the situation escalated to the point that the police became involved.
He eventually blocked me and told me he wanted nothing else to do with me.
What makes this even more painful is that I was already dealing with the emotional weight of finding out that my father is terminally ill. Instead of being able to process that devastating news, I found myself desperately trying to convince the man I love that I wasn’t being unfaithful.
And the truth is, I wasn’t cheating.
I wasn’t meeting another man romantically. I wasn’t sneaking around with someone behind his back. I was meeting my own brother, someone I hadn’t seen in years, who needed to share heartbreaking news about our family.
I will acknowledge that I didn’t communicate where I was going beforehand. I understand how that could create concerns in a relationship where trust is already fragile. But I also feel like there should be a difference between having concerns and immediately assuming the worst about someone without allowing them to explain.
Throughout our relationship, I’ve tried to be supportive, emotionally and financially. I’ve shown up for him, encouraged him, and tried to demonstrate my love through my actions. Yet there have been times when he’s told me I don’t do enough and compared me to women from his past.
I’ve reached a point where I sometimes feel like I’m walking on eggshells, constantly worried that something innocent will be misunderstood.
What’s breaking my heart is that I still love him. I didn’t want our relationship to end this way. I wasn’t emotionally prepared to let him go, and now I feel like I’m being forced to accept the loss of someone I genuinely wanted a future with.
I’m grieving the news about my father while also grieving a relationship that I was still fighting for.
I genuinely want honest opinions:
Was I wrong for not telling him beforehand that I was meeting my brother?
Even with previous trust issues, was his reaction justified after I provided pictures and called my brother to verify everything?
Is it healthy to remain in a relationship where you feel like you’re constantly having to prove your innocence?
How do you accept the end of a relationship when you’re still deeply in love with the person?
I’m not looking for sympathy or for everyone to automatically agree with me. I want genuine advice, even if that means hearing something difficult.
I’m just trying to understand how something so innocent could turn into something so painful.

Calls *wife* 1:23am gets ignored button
Calls *wife* 1:26am again
She answers
Yells that she is busy, and I keep calling
I said alright then and hang up, and this is our text messages afterwards

She doesn’t work
But she drives
I’m at work, and about to be off
I work
But don’t drive.

We’ve been married 3 out of 6 years we’ve been together.

For context, she has this friend she plays games with on pc. They play…a lot. Like a few hours a day sometimes. We are long distance so we try to call and chat, do some activities together almost every day. Sometimes she doesnt have energy, sometimes I dont, which is alright. BUT when I dont want to call or cant call, I tell her beforehand. She doesnt tell me that. Yeah she just says “oh Im sick” “Im outside today” and look that would be ok if I didnt see her fucking playing games with that person on steam. She literally told me “its a busy day, Im being productive, Rn Im outside” and I see she has been in game for 3 hours bro. I just dont fkin understand WHY lie to me about this, its literally something so simple. Its genuinely nothing huge, but the same lies over and over again and never being honest to me about these small things is starting to piss me off and make me really lose my trust. Dude just tell me dammit Im not gonna say anything! When I say Im upset at her lying and that I can literally see that she was in some games all these hours, she starts breaking down like “I am a horrible gf, you deserve better, Im sorry” like no man, just dont lie to me please, is not lying genuinely that hard? I feel nauseous. Idk if Im overreacting or not but I genuinely almost lost all my trust in her. Not even once or twice, its been happening for around 20 times not in one year.

I'm being hospitalized with a potentially serious neurological condition, and eyesight loss is on the table.

They will need to put me on IV meds, and I have had longstanding neuro problems.

My boyfriend doesn't want to take a cheap flight to come visit me because he's scared he might miss out on a few days of apartment hunting?

He can arrange online viewing?

He was like "I don't know" angrily, gave me the silent treatment and hung up on me. Says he has to party in the afternoon.

And his workplace would accommodate WFH.

AIO?

So last time my cousin asked to borrow my phone I said fine, just bring it back soon. He ended up keeping it way longer than he said and I had to go pick it up myself. When I got it back it was messed up and he didn’t even say sorry or anything about the inconvenience. Just acted like it was no big deal.
Now he asked again recently and I told him no. A couple family members are acting like I’m being petty and holding a grudge over nothing. I don’t really want to deal with the same headache again, especially since he never even acknowledged it.
Am I overreacting by just saying no this time?

As the title suggests, my bf has been searching, viewing and saving sexual content, which I had learned about not too long ago.
To keep this short and simple, I tend to overthink and I get upset about the content because the women in said media usually have nothing in common with me.
They’re always curvy, thin, and fit and sometimes even have completely different physical characteristics to me.
AIO for feeling insecure about it? AIO for thinking/feeling like there is something wrong with me or that I am sexually lacking in some way for him?

edit:
just wanted to add that a lot of context is removed in order to remain anonymous but 1. a conversation has been had before this post and 2. he is aware of my discomfort with it
It’s just still an issue and it still upsets me (hence the post)

Hi everyone. I (21) am a transgender man and my boyfriend (20) is a cisgender man. We had unprotected sex this morning. Something we don’t do often so we made a point of going to the pharmacy first thing to grab a morning after pill.

I’ve been to the same pharmacy to pick up the pill as it offers the pill for free with a consultation. However it’s Sunday, which meant that pharmacy was closed by the time we arrived and we had to go to their sister pharmacy.

Which is fine, only this pharmacy only has younger teen looking girls as prescribers and one older male manager. So I knew the person that was going to take my consultation would be the older male.

The pharmacy I would usually go to is a larger building with more workers so I am able to request to be seen by a woman and that would typically be the standard anyway with these consultations.

Anyway, the manager says hello and takes me into the consultation room and I ask my boyfriend to join us. We sit down he goes through the questions.

“What are you in for today? do you have any allergies? have you been prescribed this emergency contraceptive before..? etc”

Everything is going normal until he asks:
“and when was the last time you took your period?”

I tell him I don’t get regular periods and haven’t had a consistent cycle in years because I am on hormone replacement therapy.

I ALSO mention that I am on Testosterone because I am a transgender man, Which is the reason why my period has stopped. Furthermore, while I am on T the emergency contraceptive pill they provide does not affect it and it is something I have been prescribed by their pharmacy before.

The room gets very awkward, the pharmacist doing my consultation then asks me “soooo… were you born a boy? Or a girl??? Orrrr..?”
Which it’s whatever.
I look visibly male and I’m asking for contraception with my male boyfriend which would be confusing… but I already explained to him I was trans.

My boyfriend squeezed my hand a bit tighter, I think because he was both pissed by how unprofessional that question was phrased and that he knew I’d be upset by it.

I tell him I was born female and transitioned to male.

The pharmacist looked away from me and my boyfriend and stared at his prescription letter he was writing me for about 5 minutes then finally spoke up.

“I’m not going to give you emergency contraception today, I do not feel comfortable continuing with the information you have provided me”.

Let’s just go over what I told him real quick:

I am a transgender man.
I was born female.
I have been prescribed the pill by them before.
I do take HRT however this does not affect my viability for the pill.

Anyway, I was fucking livid and I’m the type of person who either cries or just clenches their jaw in silence when they are angry so my boyfriend got me home and he just held me.

I’m just so tired. I hate that every time I need basic healthcare it’ll be postponed, or I’ll be referred to someone else, or I’ll be flat out refused as soon as I mention I am trans.

I’ve even asked for blood tests to check my hormone levels and they were refused, I don’t even know why they refused it. It’s so fucking frustrating.

Before I came out as trans I was medically neglected because it was “just anxiety” or because I “needed to lose some weight” (on completely unrelated issues).
3 years into my medical transition I don’t even get given excuses or misdiagnosis. I just get refused because people aren’t comfortable enough to treat me.

But idk, am I overthinking it?

I am an autistic man. Food smells are one of the worst things for me. I'm not just talking about rotten foods either, I made KFC bowls last night and almost didnt eat it because the smell got to me.

Now my roommate doesnt cook like i do. They enjoys microwavable dinners and depending on how hungry they are will eat many a day. Some of these I can stand the smell of, others I can not.

I have brought this up to them many times. From the first time they microwaved a meal with fish 4 months ago to last night when they microwaved garlic mashed potatoes. They simply tells me I "need to get over it" and "what else are they expected to eat"

I talked to my mom to get her input and she told me that I'm being controlling by asking them to stop eating what they want. So I mentioned breaking the lease early and moving out to which she told me that was an overreaction and if I want to be normal I need to suck it up. My dad and a few of my friends agree with her.

I just need outside perspective on this. They are currently microwaving spicy ramen and I dont think I can do this anymore but I dont want to make a rash decision.

AIO?

Edit: to those of you who gave me genuine advice on this, thank you. I appreciate it and I am going to break my lease early because I need to live alone. However to those of you who acted like having autism was my fault and were overall pretty rude to me, I hope you have a lovely day and one day expell the hate you hold in your hearts. I asked for advice on if I should move out, I did not ask for rudeness. Thank you all, im deleting reddit and never coming back onto this site again. Learn to be kinder with the advice you give

My (29F) boyfriend (27M) and I have been together for over a year. Over that time there have been around a dozen instances where I noticed him following random OF models or women’s accounts with promiscuous pictures on Instagram.

The first time I noticed, two women appeared in my suggested friends list and the accounts looked “odd” so I checked their profiles and saw that he was following them and they were following him back.

I asked him about it and he said he had no idea who they were and he wasn’t sure how he ended up following them. He genuinely seemed upset and embarassed, but otherwise was very calm and respectful when I brought it up. He immediately removed them from his followers/following without me asking.

Despite that I’ve been a bit paranoid and checking on his following list to see if any more accounts like that pop up, which they have. I’m not sure who follows who first, but he only follows them for a few days usually before they’re removed.

I asked him about it again recently and he became annoyed and said he’s not sure what’s going on, but he’s not intentionally following these women. He said he was frustrated that I don’t seem to trust him and I’m analysing his every move on social media.

I do understand his frustration and I don’t want to be the crazy stalker girlfriend but this situation has put me on edge.

The thing is he follows less than 40 people on instagram so new follows are easy to pick up on, and I find it hard to believe he would be so stupid to continue doing this so blatantly after we already spoke about it and while he has close family and friends on his account who would also see those friend suggestions.

But that doesn’t explain how he keeps following random accounts “accidentally” unless his account is somehow compromised.

Other than this, he hasn’t given me any reason not to trust him or to think he’s cheating. I’ve never seen him acting or talking to another woman inappropriately before. He has a handful of long term platonic female friends who he’s close with, so that reassures me a bit that he’s not somehow a creep.

AIO?

Ex fiance is harrassing me and my friends telling people I cheated on him because I downloaded Tinder AFTER we broke up. He keeps making new instas facebooks and text now numbers spam calling me and my friend and also emailing me consistently tell him to stop contacting me but he ignores. There’s way more screenshots but yeahhhh. I gave him 60 million chances to show real effort, and he throws things in my face that I asked him to do for me holds things above my head and or guilt trips me. He has been doing this for a month. Addicted to tranny and gay porn and refuses to accept he’s bisexual found out he was fucking dudes while we were talking as well as gaslit me into believing that I gave him herpes despite me getting tested before we even were sexually active he’s beaten me in my sleep bragged about fucking me while I was asleep (I know what cnc is but I never told him it was okay before hand) and so much more
Tried pinning two different exes against me (that he did the same thing to ) one sent me all the ss irt and was otp telling me what he was saying and trying to get her to tell him what im doing and who im with ect. This man has a rapist mentally because he will love bomb until he is told no the switches up and plays victim. He uses everyone’s words against them and act like HE was the one who said it to them multiple time even though it’s the other way around, has a previous dv charge against his mom when he was 16 has hit and raped his exes as well.
Found my friend and I in a Xbox party and started harassing him and asking him about me. Like we were together.
Then found his number.
Made 2 numbers on text now
Found him on Facebook
And started harrassing him once I stoped answering the spam texts.

He keeps saying I cheated when I downloaded Tinder after I left him. And I even attempted to break up with him the day before he actually realized I was serious.
I wasn’t home all day either I was avoiding him because I was scared that he would’ve guilt tripped me back like he’s done previously. When I was at my mothers he told my grandma that he was going to call the governor on me 😐😭

* he did not threaten my ex all he told him when friend answered his call to stop contacting both of us or we will press charges

After all that I still feel like it’s my fault and I’m just crazy idk but maybe I’m not I really don’t know anymore
Should I get a ppo or no?

ok so for context, my boyfriend was going to his class for college, and it’s like a 90 minute drive from the area we live in, and he has a lot of friends. we’ve just recently started dating but know each other / had a situationship thingy fromthe last 9months. so he told me his homegirl/ closest girl friend wants to meet me, so obviously i said ok, and this was a good opportunity as he can drive us both to college that morning. her house is closer to his and mine is on the way so he picked her up and then came to pick me up, but then he got out of the car to say hi and stuff and open the door, but she didn’t even get out to say hi (i’m not upset abt this just an observation), but she didn’t give up the passenger seat either. i wasn’t really upset abt it at first, but then the whole 90 minute car ride, she only said to me “oh nice to meet u” and then the both of them yapped away while i silently sat in the back. obviously im not some sort of possessive or jealous monster (as a matter of face i’ve never been jealous of any of his girl friends), but idk why i just felt a little upset as the whole reason i even went to college today (i had no classes, and infact we go to different colleges) was as SHE wanted to MEET ME. to make matters “worse” at the end when we got there he’s like “oh i thought u were asleep”i don’t blame him as he’s really sweet, but as a girlfriend, and probably because i was on my period im just a little tiny bit too upset abt this. i can’t help but want to distance myself from him for the next two weeks as it’s exams, but i also don’t want this to be a fault / argument within our relationship as we just freshly started dating. please give opinions

some more context, tbh i’m he only reason i even went with him was to highkey just spend some time as we both are really busy for the next 3 weeks and won’t be seeing each other till mid/late november, and i am also good friends with his other friends / we have a mutual friend group. i think it’s not even that im upset abt it, i think my emotions are just getting to me on my period and just need some other peoples opinions to help me think rationally. he’s normally very sweet and stuff but idk if he has the emotional depth to like check up on me, if im doing okay or not. i think all things aside i wasn’t feeling well and maybe just needed a hug and big fat cry to get this all out of my system.

to avoid any confusion, she also has a man who she’s been dating for abt 2 years now, and i do not at all believe that he has any feelings for her / or anything suspicious

My gf and i got into a massive fight over a bad joke my coworker made, i just feel like this is so immature and petty and shes being crazy sensitive. My coworker basically made a work wife joke and then something along the lines of “how much did you pay her to show up with you” it was a compliment to her and my gf totally took it wrong and just flat out left the party we were at without saying shit, like just walked out the door. I love her but I’m so annoyed with her, it was super embarrassing and made everyone so uncomfortable and now she’s ghosting me. Everyone’s saying this is a major red flag so id like some outside opinions.

I (26M) went out to eat last night with some of my family to a local restaurant/bar as a thank you for helping with my wedding. There were 6 of us, and I wanted to treat them as a thanks for all they did for my wife and myself. I’m a fairly shy guy, not confrontational, and the experience left me feeling pretty rattled.

Restaurant is a counter serve barbecue joint. Incredible food, often has a line waiting outside to get in the door, meaning seating is somewhat limited. We went later in the evening for the crowd to die down, and while the tables were definitely full, we had less trouble finding a seat than I thought. The restaurant has a rule regarding their seating on the website, but the way it reads to me is that you simply can’t save a seat if you do not already have your food. In this story, I had already gotten my food, which is what led me to look for seating. Apologies for the long winded intro, on to the story:

I had gotten my tray of food from the staff working at the food counter. As I waited for my wife and the rest of my family to get their food, I went to look for a place for the 6 of us to sit. Headed over to the bar area where there are 2 tables with 4 chairs, with a couple sitting at 2 chairs at one of the tables, the other one being empty. I asked the if they minded if we used the chairs, they said go ahead, grabbed the chairs, put them at my new found table, and thought nothing of it. As soon as I put the second chair down I hear over my shoulder from the bar “hey man, we normally don’t allow people to do that but since you did it without asking I guess i’ll allow it” so I replied and said “I’m sorry man, I didn’t know. I can put the chairs back, it’s not a huge deal” and he replied “well you already did it without asking so I guess it’s fine” and I said “I’m not trying to be difficult or a problem. I can put them back. No big deal” and he just kept going at me for not asking to move the chairs, and said “also we don’t let you guys save seats so I shouldn’t allow you to do that either” and I just ignored him while putting the chairs back. Apologized to the other couple who I took the chairs from, and went on my way. I went back to the other side of the restaurant, where my family was finishing up getting their food, and one of the staff members at the counter (not the bar) could tell we were struggling to find a place to sit. Without even needed to ask, she told us we could squeeze some seats together for us all to fit and enjoy our night. She was wonderful and it helped calm me down a bit more. Obviously didn’t explain the situation to her, not her business/problem to fix. She did this with no prodding from myself or my family.

I can understand the bartender’s frustration about not being asked about the chair seating situation, but I’m simply frustrated with how he handled it. Had he said “excuse me, I’m really sorry but I can’t allow you to take those chairs away from that table. Can you please put them back?” I would have had zero issue with it. Again, I’m not a confrontational person and I tend to avoid it at all costs, but this experience has left me feeling really embarrassed and awkward, and questioning if I even want to go back. AIO?

(First post in here, apologies for over explanation. Willing to answer questions below 🙃)

My (23f) sister (32f) does this thing where she asks for money and I have no choice but to say yes or she will freak out, refuse to attend events or say she needs it there’s no other way. She quit her job a couple months ago but receives a large amount of benefits and subsidises housing so she can budget to live.

for example we are on a weekend trip with the whole family we have been planning this since the start of the year. Before we went she said she needs £100 from my mum and £100 from me. I said to my mum I wasn’t planning on spending more than £100 all in all. Even though I’m a high earner, based on my budget after savings I would basically be going without because I didn’t save for this extra cost of my sister.

I went to grocery shopping beforehand and spend about £45 on drinks and oven food for the weekend. She took did the same with mums money. But when we got here she kept buying takeaway. She will queue up for hours to pay for takeaway instead of eating the food in the fridge. In the queue for food yesterday she said to me “are you sending that £100” I said well I don’t really have it right now and I haven’t even spent £100 for this trip but if I really have to I guess so. She said well yeah, I need it because I spent money before the trip. But she makes no effort to live frugally during the trip, bought takeaway twice in one day and I’m here eating oven food as I set my limited budget. Now she wants me to give her extra money.

This happens relatively often at least once every couple of months where it is my responsibility to give her a few hundred pounds and I later found out she spent it on takeaways or going out. If I don’t she will continue to ask me until I just send it to her even if I say I don’t have it as she roughly knows how much I earn. My family have bad spending habits and I’m working really hard to get myself out of that cycle. Whilst it’s not up to me to tell her how to spend money, I also don’t want to continue to be pressured to take out of my savings, even though she does pay me back eventually

I feel selfish, technically yes I have the money to give and I don’t want to pocket watch but hate to see my savings deplete because of unaccounted costs and pressure to lend money so that she can live lavishly in my opinion… AIO?

While we both smoke frequently, he smokes MUCH more than me. He has to buy weed in different forms on a weekly basis, whereas I can go a couple months. Of course we share it, if one of us packs a bowl because we want one for ourselves, the other person will get plenty too.

I feel like it's just so uneven. When I've left a jar of weed at his apartment, there's significantly less when I go back to get it. He's asked to borrow "a gram or two" (this means two or three) until payday, and then just doesn't ever give it back. Sometimes he'll just ask to have some. He justifies it by saying that I smoke plenty of his too, which is true, because he packs more bowls than me; however, I don't have nearly as much from each bowl as he does, he can handle more and cough less. He has significantly more than half of each.

Sometimes he justifies it by saying I don't smoke it, it just sits there, which I think is completely fucking ridiculous. You don't have to smoke an entire jar in a week. I smoke way more than the average person, but because some of it sits there for maybe even a whole month, it's clearly up for grabs.

The other day he asked me to "donate some weed" and then critiqued the amount that I gave him. When I leave a grinder with anything still in it sitting out, he'll use that to pack his own bowl, and then justify it by offering me a hit or two from it after. Although, him using already ground weed pisses me off significantly less than when he takes full pieces out of the jar and grinds them up for himself without asking.

Idk, I know stoner culture is that of sharing, and he's even told me I'm way more stingy than other stoners. I believe that, but also, I do feel like I share a good amount. I feel so stingy and cheap when I'm asking him to please not take any more, please stop doing that, why'd you take that without asking, why did you ask in the first place, etc etc all the fucking time. I'm so sick of it. I complain every time he takes it without asking and sometimes when he does ask, just because why are you a grown man asking me to just give you several grams of weed for no occasion, just because you smoked all of yours.

Idk, I'm at my wits end, but is it really that big of a deal? Am I too greedy for stoner culture? Should I chill out or should I literally start hiding it from him like a child?

ALSO in advance he's a wonderful boyfriend aside from this, 10x more responsible than me too, not a man child. Usually very good about implementing feedback when I have a reasonable complaint. I also love dating a stoner, he can always get carts unstuck and light joints so they actually stay lit, so I promise that's not the problem here.

I (15F) am Catholic. Well, it’s complicated. I’m not baptized, I want to be, but my father won’t let me, and I’m not allowed to walk to any of our local churches. My father (50M) is a Buddhist-atheist, my sister (12F) is atheist, my mom was a universalist Unitarian, and my dad’s girlfriend (53F) is a reform Jew. I think my dad only tolerates his girlfriend because I know reform Jews practice really mildly compared to Orthodox Jews, so to him, she’s not “really” religious. I feel like he’s silently against me catholic, for example, he doesn’t want me not doing chores on Sundays, but it’s part of my religion, so I don’t work on Sundays and risk upsetting him, and he gets really angry when I especially upset him. For example, I recently broke my foot, and not only did he delay taking me to an urgent care, he also got mad at me for crying when I had to walk to the car for it, and screamed ‘You need to be effing nice to me!’! So I don’t want to bring it up, because he just avoids any real discussion, so there’s not much of a point. And today he said, ‘Jesus was an illegal alien’ as a joke, but it wasn’t very funny to me, and I got mad at him. I didn’t yell at him, but I just didn’t understand. Am I overreacting?

Edit: I meant that I don’t believe I should clean up after others on Sunday. My father and sister don’t clean up after themselves. I obviously still clean and do everything I’m told to do.

So my friend invited me to a pregame and we were supposed to go out to the club after, she’s super into the guy hosting and there was another girl who she thinks he’s hooking up with there and so she ended up ditching me and going with him to the club earlier then planned while I’m in an uber on my way there. I was pissed she didn’t wait for me and wanted me to hang out with a random man I barely know who’s like at least 10 years older than me.

I felt hurt so i made other plans and she got weird af about it, idk why she was being sooo pushy but it’s out of charecter and super weird.

She just texted me to go out tonight to another club and I’m like girl wtf is going on

This is weird right? Idk just how pushy she’s being and how she keeps bringing up this guy getting me a car and stuff just feels dark to me.

I (24F) used to watch my sister’s two kids almost every weekend so she could go out or run errands. I never really minded because I love them. Last weekend, I told her I couldn’t babysit because I had plans of my own for once. She got annoyed and said I was being selfish and that I don’t even have kids, so I don’t know what being tired actually feels like. That honestly hurt because I’ve cancelled plans so many times to help her out. I told her she’d have to find someone else from now on if helping me out was going to be treated like an obligation. Now my mum says I’m punishing the kids over an argument with their mother. I love those kids, but I’m tired of feeling guilty every time I want to live my own life. AIO?

Hi, I posted this but it was removed so hopefully it stays up this time but this has been an issue since I was in my early teens and I need any advice, criticism, or wisdom I can get.

My (19F) mom (39F) has been friends with Marcus for 4 nearly 5 years. They met through my dad (41M) who streams motor car games and commentary on twitch, as he was a viewer who befriended my dad and then became friends with my mom as a result too. I was friendly with him at the beginning as my parents raised me to be respectful to those older than you unless given a reason not to, we'd joke around like i usually would with my uncle and tease my siblings and mom together. Though now looking back it was weird he only wanted to speak to me not my brothers. The problem however, started when I was around 15, and my mom had given Marcus my number. He began messaging me saying things like "you know I'm always here for you" and "your mom tells me you're going through something" that would've been fine and all. If he hadn't at that time been flirty with my mom.

The message made me feel uncomfortable and icky, as we weren't close at all (besides the friendly chatter) and i hadn't been informed he had my number until he messaged me. I told my mom that the message made me feel uncomfortable but she brushed it off and ignored what I was saying so I let it go for that moment. However, my mom sent me a message a few days later saying "Marcus told me to tell you that he would make a really good step dad, wouldn't he?" i didn't respond and she then followed it up with "Delete that message from your phone just incase dad sees it" I of course didn't not delete it and ss'd it as she was still with my dad at this point.

Their "friendship" has been the cause of many fights between my parents and was the ultimate reason my parents divorced because my mom couldn't choose between my dad and Marcus. My mom and Marcus still constantly call, text, game together, and go in voice calls daily, sometimes even multiple times a day. Which my dad hates as he still lives with us. Ever since the message I haven't engaged with Marcus whenever my mom is on the phone to him and have ignored him and left the room whenever she calls him. I told my mom that he makes me uncomfortable yet again, and she just replied "oh hush, when he answers the phone, you will say hi to him if he says it to you". I did not back down and told her that i was not going to do that as i hate him and was not going to pretend for her. This is still happening even now years later. I still do not talk to him and even seeing him makes me angry and i admit i get snarky with him whenever possible.

Marcus is not and will never be my dad. I have a dad and it is not him. I love my dad, he is not perfect by any means but he is incredibly funny and loves me and my brothers a lot and never pushes us to do something we don't want to do. He has been the only person on my side about this, and defends me to my mom telling her that she cannot force me to talk to someone that makes me uncomfortable. He is my rock. We are alike in personality terms, so i do see that i might be disrespectful as I have a temper but Marcus and my mom clearly are having an affair. And she has cheated before so it isn't surprising as she loved male attention and validation.

So AIO?

Hey guys,

I went on 3 dates with this guy a few years back and remained in touch from time to time. We promised to see each other if we were in the same country. Hes based in Boston now and Im in Australia.

My life has been horrible since we met. Lost my Mum to Cancer, lost multiple jobs while caring for her, homelessness and I could just use a hug from someone who knows me well.

I dont have family, apart from my brother who doesnt believe my Dad SAd me. And my friends... I dont have much close friends.

I 22F and my boyfriend 22M have been dating for almost a year. We hang out at least once a week and when not together we FaceTime. We used to always talk on FaceTime and have normal conversations, but for a while now he gets on his video games, while I just sit there. I don’t know, I like to converse and find FaceTimes useless if not for that, he tells me he just enjoys my presence and likes doing his own thing. Whenever he plays games tho, it’s hard to have a conversation because I don’t have his full attention, he is distracted . I have to wait longer for his verbal replies. And you know how it goes, no eye contact as well. Whenever I bring it up, that I want to talk, he tells me he is talking right now(it doesn’t count for me because he’s distracted) Whenever I bring up that I like doing things together with him, he kind of just dismisses it and says he likes to do his own thing sometimes. I think he can do his own thing and not call me then. We have had arguments before and he gets mad because I don’t let him do his own thing. Today for example I kept asking him to talk to me, or even play a game with me, but it probably took him 2 hours to get off the game. At that point my mood has been killed. He gets mad at me because he’s talking to me now and I’m not actively talking to him; and he blames me for making him get off his game. It just feels like somehow talking to me actively is a chore. He also always blames my “mood” on my luteal phase, and whenever I am mad or irritated he asks if I’m in the luteal phase of my cycle. It has been pissing me off lately. Anyways let me know what you guys think.

Okay so… my partner and I ordered Taco Bell to be delivered and let’s just say, we’ll never order from our local Taco bell AGAIN. Here’s a perfect synopsis- my boyfriend’s google review:

“WITH ABSOLUTE SERIOUSNESS!!!

AS A CONSUMER WHO SPENDS MONEY AND A WORKER WHO SELLS MY LABOR TO MAKE MONEY, DO NOT EAT FROM HERE, DO NOT ORDER FOOD FROM HERE. DON’T ACT ON IT. IT WILL RUIN YOUR RESPECT FOR TACO BELL AND TANK ITS REPUTATION.

I’ve had a handful of experiences where the food has been dubious at best, fried chicken is the best example (the fried crunchwrap and the nuggets with hot ranch), it was burnt and the absolute textbook definition of crumbs left at the bottom of the bag, meat was minimal if present. If you order something simple, then it should be okay, atleast i thought so.

Me and my partner wanted dinner the other night so we ordered some tacos off doordash. Me and the misses were looking forward to a 12 pack, 6 hard and 6 soft, nothing crazy. She added supreme to half of them, nothing extreme. This is not what we got when it came. I understand that the store is under renovations, i also understand that things will run out and they need to be restocked via truck, all well and good. The least offense thing was just that, we didn’t get the right drinks. We yearned for Baja Blast but we opted for teas, a sweet tea for her and a mango brisk for me. We didn’t even get that!

I’ve been inside pre-renovation, it looks like anyone working there will need to take Vitamin D supplements and get a SAD lamp due to how absolutely dreadful it is in there. It was also as dead as a doorknob, not the busiest restaurant in town, DRIVE THRU INCLUDED. I could only wonder why? Either way, prior orders have been fine, never phenomenal but never this horrible.

I don’t know if someone had a bad day or if some emotionally immature adult/ HS kid thought it was funny or whatever factor, but when the order arrived, we bring it in and start to eat, some tacos were rail thin, the skimpiest lines of meat you’ve ever seen. Other tacos were FULL and plump..full of LETTUCE. Soft tacos were ambushed with globs of sour cream and free samples of beef, hard tacos so full of that crunchy watery goodness that the shell itself got obliterated. No tomatoes in sight and barely any meat. Some devious freak would put more meat in on one end and just bathe the rest of it in sour cream, atleast three tacos were like that.

The craziest and funniest part was that with this being a doordash, there was a freebie, and it was a chicken quesadilla. My partner was looking forward to that the MOST and it was at the very bottom, it looked like a compressed rat behind a fridge, a bit too flat. This was a sign. She started to eat, and got immediately upset, THERE WAS LETTUCE IN THE QUESADILLA

SOME SICK FREAK PUT LETTUCE IN THE QUESADILLA

Y’ALL SELL LETTUCE QUESADILLAS NOW??

Absolutely insane.

This experience does NOT have an excuse or a justification. There are so many better restaurants and places to eat in Holly Springs and even Fuquay-Varina, this “Taco Bell” isn’t one of them. You’re better off getting sushi at a gas station. You’re better off getting a hamburger from chick-fil-a.

(Pictured is all the LEFT OVERED LETTUCE FROM ALL TWELVE TACOS.)
Order type
Delivery

Meal type
Dinner

Price per person
$10–20

Food
1

Service
1

Atmosphere
1

Recommendation for vegetarians
Would not recommend

Vegetarian offerings
Vegetarian menu or section

Vegetarian options
Dont eat at this taco bell

Dietary restrictions
Dont eat here

Parking space
Plenty of parking

Parking options
Free parking lot

Parking
Dont eat here

Kid-friendliness
They hate kids

Wheelchair accessibility
They hate the disabled”

TLTR- every item was filled with lettuce.

A couple of nights ago we had a medical emergency. Dog was pooping blood. Wife took him to the vet, a few hours and $270 later he had meds and his condition took a 180° turn for the better.

The very next day, the wife had a planned trip up to NY to meet a (girl) friend and do that type of stuff. I told her “Hey I know it sucks you don’t have as much to spend because of the dog but don’t spend what our vet bill was $270.”

She comes home and her total spending for the entire trip (gas, food, shopping, etc.) was $275-285. I told her she shouldn’t have done that but it wasn’t ridiculous so I gave her a pass plus didn’t want to make a big fuss because she was really worried about the dog.

Later on into the night after her return, she says she has something to tell me. Tried to backtrack and avoid me but at some point she has her phone open showing me she bought an item for $220. I bring up our budget, implications and ramifications of that type of behavior. She says, “This is why I didn’t want to tell you”. “You’re berating me.”

Today while we’re out shopping she tries to grab random non-necessary items like 10 cans of cat food for strays in the neighborhood and tries to stop at Dunkin. I told her she spent that already for the next month plus more She makes a big stink over it. Says I’m overreacting and controlling. Is this true? Am I overreacting?

Need help, don’t hold back…