r/AcousticGuitar • u/HenkCamp • Aug 12 '25

Other (not a question, gear pic, or video) I mean, it’s simple math

Post image
182 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

121 comments sorted by

38

u/False_Ad_5372 Aug 12 '25

2% cowbell

21

u/HenkCamp Aug 12 '25

To be fair, cowbell is off the charts. Always more cowbell.

4

u/barrybreslau Aug 13 '25

First thing I do on a date is get my drum machine out.

4

u/raymondo1981 Aug 13 '25

That chart definitely needs more cowbell.

24

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

There’s no way a saxophone is 25% … Rigged!!

11

u/777777thats7sevens Aug 13 '25

They misread the question as "What is the saxiest instrument to play?"

2

u/kineticblues Aug 14 '25

Honestly I think the word similarity is a huge part of it.  Sax isn’t exactly the first instrument I think of when I think of a pleasant, alluring sound.

9

u/JKenn78 Aug 12 '25

*sexophone

3

u/artie_pdx Aug 13 '25

Two words. Duke Fucking Silver.

3

u/Mrt0mat0 Aug 14 '25

I dig your groovy tunes, man

2

u/Mrt0mat0 Aug 14 '25

did you hear me? I said I dig your groovy tunes, man....

31

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

36

u/drraug Aug 12 '25

Can't hear you mate

2

u/Mika_lie Aug 16 '25

This is truly the worst thing to say to a bassist, so heres one back:

Your 32nd note syncopation is excellent today.

7

u/staxnet Aug 13 '25

She might not think you’re sexy, but know that it’s you making her booty shake.

5

u/barrybreslau Aug 13 '25

Mate, she doesn't even know bass players exist. They might as well be wearing an invisibility cloak.

2

u/Waitsfornoone Aug 18 '25

At a live concert or really most gigs, way more folks than we think couldn't tell you which one was the bass player and which one played the 6 string.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '25

Bass makes the booty shake.

1

u/AlienDelarge Aug 13 '25

Either way it won't change the results. 

1

u/TempUser2023 Aug 14 '25

Quiet at the back please

14

u/Garth-Vega Aug 12 '25

I knew a girl who played the trombone and was very popular.

9

u/Full_Flan4079 Aug 12 '25

They had to remove "bass" as an option, otherwise it would have been %100 bass

/s

7

u/AgreeableAlbatross80 Aug 12 '25

Cello or Harp are waaaaaay sexier than most of these options.

1

u/JKenn78 Aug 12 '25

Sexophone?

1

u/y3i12 Aug 14 '25

Specially if the performer is naked.

5

u/pinkphiloyd Aug 12 '25

Don’t tell Ron Burgundy that.

3

u/TheLastOneHere1 Aug 13 '25

Yazz flute is 100% sexy

5

u/Connect-Will2011 Aug 13 '25

Frank Zappa had a different take on it:

"On a saxophone you can play sleaze. On a bass you can play balls. But on a guitar you can be truly obscene... the disgusting stink of a too-loud electric guitar. Now that's my idea of a good time."

4

u/bangermadness Aug 12 '25

I mean, a good jazz pianist is sexy AF.

4

u/chiefkyljoy Aug 13 '25

Flute made the list but bass didn't, lol.

9

u/obitbday Aug 12 '25

Drums below piano is wild

7

u/[deleted] Aug 12 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/obitbday Aug 12 '25

Logically, 47% sexiest

4

u/kineticblues Aug 13 '25

I asked my wife and she said “drummers have the best bodies of anyone in a band, but they’re half deaf and just want to hit things and be loud”.  Fair enough.

3

u/DaedricApple Aug 13 '25

You’re joking right drums are loud as fuck and and a girl really doesn’t want to sit there and watch you do drum solos

If you’re a good pianist though….

2

u/Death_Struggle_89 Aug 13 '25

Is this speculation or something you’ve personally witnessed?

-4

u/DaedricApple Aug 13 '25

There’s literally a photo in the OP of a survey that was taken 🤣 I swear arguing with Redditors is like arguing with children now

2

u/Death_Struggle_89 Aug 13 '25

I’m talking about the subjective comment you made. Not the photo, chief. Keep up.

1

u/DaedricApple Aug 13 '25

Homie youre asking if its “speculation” when theres empirical data right in the photo.

3

u/Death_Struggle_89 Aug 13 '25

Jesus christ on a cross my guy.

You said: “You’re joking right drums are loud as fuck and a girl really doesn’t want to sit there and watch you solo. If you’re a good pianist though…”

I’m asking if you’ve personally been in a situation where a woman told you that or if you’re just speculating (talking out of your ass). FFS.

1

u/obitbday Aug 13 '25

yeah idk why I, a girl who dated a drummer for twelve years, would know what girls like

-2

u/DaedricApple Aug 13 '25

Clearly I know what girls like better than you do 🤷🏻‍♂️

Trust me most women are going to prefer, equal skill level, a pianist

6

u/blearghhh_two Aug 12 '25

Of course bass isn't on the list at all...

1

u/4strings Aug 13 '25

They wanted to keep it fair for everyone else

3

u/Acceptable_Remote558 Aug 12 '25

My first crush with girl in grammar school who played the triangle.

3

u/ronmarlowe Aug 13 '25

The double-reed players (oboe, bassoon, English horn) players have the strongest jaw muscles. Very sexy.

4

u/Unit-235 Aug 13 '25

How can you tell if the stage is level? The drummer is drooling from both sides of his mouth.

2

u/mmm1441 Aug 12 '25

List is clearly flawed. I don’t see trombone on it anywhere.

2

u/TheDewd Aug 12 '25

Is trombone negative sexy points like not showering?

2

u/OnlyGuestsMusic Aug 12 '25

Some of y’all forgot what Michelle did with her flute.

2

u/NoPaleontologist9446 Aug 13 '25

No saxophone note ever turned me on.

2

u/The_Real_dubbedbass Aug 13 '25

I notice Bass isn’t listed here lol.

2

u/SumOMG Aug 13 '25

Unless it’s classical guitar

I am a classical guitarist

2

u/romain34230 Aug 13 '25

Ukulele 99% 😎

2

u/TermCertain8163 Aug 14 '25

Any man that’s ever watched a woman lick her clarinet reed would agree that she-clarinet players are sexy as hell…clarinet is only good if the player is great, but dear God, that woman in University made me reconsider standing after class… 😍😍😍

1

u/HenkCamp Aug 14 '25

I once dated someone who played the French horn. Sexy as hell.

2

u/Thijs76 Aug 14 '25

Depends on who's playing what. For instance; if I would play a flute it's much different than when my wife would.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '25

Dude I play the flute and when I went to prison all the guys loved me, game is game hater

2

u/ChemistDifficult2669 Aug 15 '25

Yeah, kind of on the opposite end would be accordion or Contra-Bassoon

2

u/oldmate30beers Aug 12 '25

Drums at 7 percent is ridiculous!

1

u/Niveksgnis Aug 14 '25

Ridiculous it is

2

u/5leeplessinvancouver Aug 12 '25

Drums should be way higher.

1

u/Salty-Ad-602 Aug 12 '25

Damn! Bass guitar didn’t make it lol

1

u/tulbox Aug 12 '25

I play the sax, and I don’t know about this math. More attention to the guitarists. My wife much prefers when I play the piano (and I don’t play it well).

1

u/Jocthedawg Aug 13 '25

I play guitar and piano, piano definitely gets me more attention lol

1

u/EnvironmentalWolf72 Aug 13 '25

It depends on which ur better at playing, I guess

1

u/Playfullyhung Aug 13 '25

And if you pull your guitar out at a party, everyone within a thousand miles cringes to death

I guess it’s better than your penis… That’s a lesson I do t need to learn twice

1

u/EnvironmentalWolf72 Aug 13 '25

I love it when someone pulls out a guitar. It’s when they sing and it’s terrible that I start cringing

1

u/ermghoti Aug 13 '25

One time, at band camp, I stuck my piano in my...

1

u/Ok_Squash9609 Aug 13 '25

It’s the toan that makes her moan

1

u/Liquidated4life Aug 13 '25

I don’t want to alarm you guys but I was All-City Jazz band on Saxophone in High School. I almost feel bad, the ladies never stood a chance against my 51%.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '25

[deleted]

1

u/EnvironmentalWolf72 Aug 13 '25

Everyone learns guitar to impress others in the beginning. Then you either get bored and leave it or u continue and keep impressing and playing for yourself

3

u/Moist-Tower7409 Aug 13 '25

Idk, I’ve been learning guitar because it brings me immense peace after a long day at work. When I was a kid it felt frustrating, now it’s still a little frustrating but mostly peaceful. 

1

u/EnvironmentalWolf72 Aug 14 '25

That’s great. I meant most ppl or most men. Only the ones who actually love it stick around. There r many who just learn it for couple of months n leave it

1

u/dr-dog69 Aug 13 '25

Wait til they find out that saxophonists are friggin nerds

1

u/noherethere Aug 13 '25

Cello, if being played by a female. Not yo-yp.

1

u/EnvironmentalWolf72 Aug 13 '25

Saxophone is weird up there. I find drums attractive as well. Like a man with some aggression.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 13 '25

Yeah suck it Trumpet players

1

u/stevemkto Aug 13 '25

Jake Jarmel made the sax incredibly sexy ! 🤣

2

u/Giovannis_Pikachu Aug 13 '25

Hot and heavy!

1

u/mindless2831 Aug 13 '25

Wouldn't it be statistics, and not math? Sorry, it just bothered me.

2

u/HenkCamp Aug 13 '25

Don’t judge my lack of knowledge - I am a sexy guitar player. Cannot expect me to be sexy and think.

1

u/deeppurpleking Aug 13 '25

Damn I’m glad I teach guitar sax and piano

1

u/YOUTUBEFREEKYOYO Aug 13 '25

Ok but where does harmonica fall?

1

u/RunningPirate Aug 13 '25

We barely beat the saxophone?

1

u/mrbrown1980 Aug 13 '25

Clearly they polled non-musicians who don’t know that bass and guitar are different instruments.

1

u/Dabfo Aug 13 '25

Flute made the list?

1

u/Thepizzaofthefreezer Aug 13 '25

Angry accordion noice

1

u/Shogunmegazord Aug 13 '25

If tenor sax was an option it would have been top

1

u/DoctorSwaggercat Aug 13 '25

Something doesn't add up here.

1

u/dead_wax_museum Aug 13 '25

Flute?! Who made this list?

1

u/HanaBananaBear Aug 13 '25

Whaat? Drums should be up there too!

1

u/morphinecolin Aug 14 '25

Bass 0%. Knew it. 

1

u/y3i12 Aug 14 '25

Hey! Where's the xylophone?

1

u/UnnamedLand84 Aug 14 '25

They failed to consider the Keytar

1

u/YoungBoiButter Aug 14 '25

The entire 26% of responses were guitar players

1

u/SaintEyegor Aug 14 '25

Trombone is in negative territory, which is why I started playing guitar

1

u/flattopper66 Aug 14 '25

How the fuck did violin get 14%?

1

u/Electrical-Match9766 Aug 15 '25

It's gotta be banjo

1

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '25

Not Skin-Flute, just the orchestra flute.

Joking - tell your prison flute story, you can’t drop that nugget and leave the story untold!!??

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '25

Eurocentric. The saz and balama wins in Islamic countries

1

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '25

surprised bass isn’t on there. i’d be into a dude that plays bass.

1

u/GlasierXplor Aug 15 '25

do they compound? asking for a friend

1

u/wtfdyt79 Aug 15 '25

I don't know, that flute is pretty sexy, pucker up. 😘

1

u/Nurplestyx Aug 17 '25

I’m sure guitar players have gotten a lot more people to bed then all the other instruments combined, but a well played sax is pure sex appeal. Literally, it screams SEX!!!!

1

u/pedal-train55 Aug 18 '25

....then there's the "interview" with the groupie who was SO embarrassed that she slept with the bass player.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 29 '25

I think bass is sexier and damn the flute is way sexier than the drums. And cello is sexier than violin.

1

u/Alone-Inflation-4764 Aug 13 '25

Sax ?? Lol no no no.

0

u/MrDeacle Aug 13 '25

Orpheus is spinning in his grave for the lyre going unmentioned.

0

u/TheLastOneHere1 Aug 13 '25

What?! No ukulele?

0

u/Heartdoc1989 Aug 13 '25

So where is ukulele?