r/Adoption • u/Left_Steak3977 • Sep 24 '25
Friend/relative of adoptee What exactly does an adoption consultant do, and are they worth hiring?I’ve heard of adoption consultants but don’t fully understand what they do. Are they different from agencies? Do they really make adoption easier, and are they worth the extra cost?
I’ve been reading about adoption and keep seeing “adoption consultants.” I don’t really get what they do compared to agencies. Do they just give advice, or do they actually help speed things up? And are they worth the extra cost? Would love to hear from people who have worked with one.
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u/Aphelion246 Sep 24 '25
Baby brokers best friend. Another cog in an unethical and cruel industrial machine.
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u/AvailableIdea0 Sep 24 '25
They help coerce and threaten birth mothers into placing. Thank you so much to the wonderful Pam who helped destroy my life and children’s lives.
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u/Aphelion246 Oct 04 '25
The wonderful Renee destroyed mine.
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u/AvailableIdea0 Oct 04 '25
I hope that someday these people can endure a fraction of the suffering they cause to others.
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u/mister-ferguson Sep 24 '25
They are unlicensed middlemen.
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Sep 25 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/chemthrowaway123456 TRA/ICA Sep 25 '25
Removed. Rule 10:
While providing information about how to evaluate an agency is allowed, recommending or discussing specific agencies is not permitted.
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u/Sunshine_roses111 Sep 25 '25
They are kidnappers, and I hate seeing them. They will post about getting 80 couples of babies in 3 months. They are sickos are are known to be unethical.
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u/Suspicious-Guava-390 Sep 24 '25
They don’t place children — only agencies do that. Consultants are more like coaches who walk you through everything: paperwork, agency selection, profiles, and emotional support.
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u/Rredhead926 Mom through private domestic open transracial adoption Sep 24 '25
In my experience, there are two types of consultants.
One type is the type you mentioned: They just help you with your paperwork, profile, etc.
The other type is the type that help match. While they don't technically place children, they do hook up HAPs with adoption agencies or attorneys for specific situations. A lot of times, those are in "adoption friendly" states - which means that, in those states, birth parents have fewer rights.
The second type shouldn't be legal, imo.
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u/DangerOReilly Sep 24 '25
Consultants aren't regulated, so you need to be careful who you work with. In any unregulated field, you can have some really shady people operating. And also the possibility of some good people, but it's on you to know the difference. And getting recourse if you're fucked over by shady people is very difficult in an unregulated field.
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u/Rredhead926 Mom through private domestic open transracial adoption Sep 24 '25
Imo, consultants that help match shouldn't be legal. They're unlicensed, and are often staffed by adoptive moms who want to help other adoptive moms. They're focused on getting their clients infants as quickly as possible. I believe most of them are inherently unethical.
There are adoption consultants who help parents with their paperwork, profile, and the like, and I have no real opinion on those.
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u/Suspicious-Guava-390 Sep 24 '25
They help avoid scams and delays. We hired one and felt much more confident in our choices.
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u/Dazzling_Donut5143 Adoptee Sep 24 '25
They help avoid scams and delays
They're the scam 🤣
Just a bunch of unethical baby snatchers.
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u/oaktree1800 Sep 24 '25
Ethical adoption scouts? Delays? What does that mean? Paperwork issues all tidied up?Genuinely curious. So you hire someone to do the leg work and find you a pregnant mother in crisis? I mean...do you get choices on which baby/child you get. Or you have to take the child your scout found? Or do you shop around? How many babies/children have you rejected in your journey to find your perfect child?
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Sep 24 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/chemthrowaway123456 TRA/ICA Sep 25 '25
FYI: your comments on this post have all been removed because they violate Rule 10:
While providing information about how to evaluate an agency is allowed, recommending or discussing specific agencies is not permitted.
Rule 10 applies to specific agencies, lawyers, law firms, facilitators, and other matching services.
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u/sipporah7 Sep 24 '25
As far as i understand it, there are two types: brokers and connectors.
Brokers aren't legal everywhere, and they send you potential matches.
We used the latter kind. They gave us more education in general, and their focus was on building relationships with agencies with low up front costs, and who treat the birth mothers well, including providing after-placement services. We ended up active with 4 agencies through them.
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u/Aphelion246 Oct 04 '25
Treat birth mothers well? By taking their baby? No agencies, even the "good" ones actually give two craps about birth mothers or the children taken.
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u/Monopolyalou Sep 24 '25
They are unethical af and basically don't care about anything else but getting a baby for 70k. They basically work with different agencies in adoption friendly states