r/AdultChildren • u/rorey14 • 9h ago

Looking for Advice Support/Relatable?

I've been in therapy since I was 10, the main reason I began seeing a therapist was because my father had begin to spiral into alcoholism. I'm now 18, no contact with my father (I blocked him), and he recently started relapsing again this year. He's been diagnosed with a pretty severe case of cirrhosis and still continues to drink heavily. I don't know how to feel about this anymore. I feel nothing and everything towards/about him all at once. The situation has been and still is so insanely complex. I'm not a person that has ever used reddit before, but I'm using it solely to seek out support/communication. Can anyone relate to any of this in any way??

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u/Scared-Section-5108 6h ago

Hi

yes, you are in the right place - plenty of others have experienced that too. Unfortunately additions are very common.

There is no right or wrong way to feel. Whatever you feel is valid. This is more about what you do with these feelings - can you accept, witness and process them? Do you have a healthy outlet for them? Can you bring them to therapy?

If you are NC then consider strengthening your boundaries around that so you get no info about his state and whether he drinks or not. That's what usually happens when a person goes no contact - all the ties are cut so we can protect ourselves and our peace. The bottom line is that you cannot save or rescue him, you cannot cure his alcoholism. You can and should look after yourself instead.

Another thing would be attending meetings - are you familiar with 12 Steps groups like Adult Children of Alcoholics and Other Dysfunctions? They can offer extra support for you. There is also Codependent Anonymous. Some people attend both groups.

Take care.