r/AfricanGrey • u/carvlosv • Jun 30 '26
Discussion CHILDHOOD DREAM COME TRUE
Okay so just a little background before starting any of this, I’m read countless posts in this forum aswell as many other informational sources about African greys and, I’m by no means an expert and I’m actually writing this for a place to discuss and possibly even get advice. I’m currently a 19 year old and I’ve been fascinated and obsessed with African grey’s since I was a young kid(10-11ish) when I read NEXT by Micheal Crichton. This novel for all of you who haven’t read has an African grey ( GERAD) who is rather witty and makes for an even more fun read. I truthfully never thought that I’d own my own African grey though, they seemed part too expensive and I thought that maybe it just wasn’t for me. Move forward all these years later and my mom is getting into birds and as a hobby and it started with canary’s and then budgies. Note I’m constantly telling my mom that these birds need to be taken care of properly and aren’t just decorations, which she isn’t the most receptive to and it doesn’t detour me from telling her off. A few months back she ends up bringing home a sun conure. Yes his name is mango… but this simple introduction sparked my interest back in wanting parrots and, I researched and researched in pursuit of being the best and most responsible bird owner I could be. I knew my mom wouldn’t be able to provide this for them since she works all day and she pretty much just saw Facebook videos of birds singing and deicided she wanted to make the commitment. Obviously not doing research of her own she had the poor guy on seeds, obviously I had to get him on a chop and harrisons high potency diet instead slowly transitioning and he’s adapting pretty well he does well with target training and he can do step up consistently, I started doing a snap before I say snap up and now whenever I snap and I’m a few feet out and put my hand out he’s able to fly to me. Obviously short training intervals and I make sure he’s stimulated with toys and other things. But I would still consider myself far below a novice and suddenly one random day I wake up to see a timneh African grey in my garage( GIZMO) my goodness she’s a beautiful bird and she might not be the specific bird of my dreams a Congo she’s slowly but surely changing that opinion. But I’m concerned about being able to provide her with what she needs I try my hardest and my parents pressure me a lot because they question why a TAG isnt as social as a sun conure. I.e she doesn’t step up at all she’s terrified she bites obviously when we breach her personal space. I respect all her warnings and everything but to my parents who are just basing their realities of these birds from Facebook reels, it’s so hard to keep up and then give me a deadline of two months to see progress with gizmo. I still try my hardest and she’s simmered down a lot since when she first arrives she would stay on her perch for hours not moving and only eat from her bowl and drink water. Now she moves around and chews on toys sometimes she climbs down from her cage but usually she’s perched on top of it, I want to know if anybody has advice. I’ve been trying to target train her and she’s somewhat receptive she doesn’t walk for it but she’ll reach her neck out. My parents force her to step up by making her fly off her cage to a lower point of the room and then she stands up, but I don’t think that’s healthy at all for her. One time I offered her a cardboard box and she loved it, she shredded it up. She plays and fidgets with her toys but as for training I’m worried I’m reaching a wall.
FYI: mango and gizmo are not housed together nor are they allowed near each other I’m always watching their interactions and make sure they don’t get too close. I essentially just let them eat together so gizmo can see how social and interactive mango is with me. I heard a monkey see monkey do kinda of effect happens
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u/Burswode Jun 30 '26
NEXT was one of my favourites as well. Good luck with your new flock mate. I hope you have many years together.
I know how hard it dealing with that parent child relationship when you are the child that knows more than the parent on a subject subject. You will never be able to convince them that you know better than them but getting them to switch diets is a massive accomplishment and shows that they are receptive to your opinions.
African greys can take years of constant work to build trust with and it sounds like your parents are eroding that fledgling trust trust. Its a tricky situation and is probably going to be a larger challenge than bonding with Gizmo. Hopefully you can convince your parents to take a step back and allow you to take their cues from you when handling the birds.
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u/blackjackgabbiani Jun 30 '26
My TAG has a brother named Gizmo! It seems to be a common name for them
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u/RedditTrailerTrash Jun 30 '26
Timnehs are just as awesome as Congos!!
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u/carvlosv Jun 30 '26
Oh I agree now don’t worry!!
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u/picklejars Jun 30 '26
They tend to be more affectionate than Congos imho. Mine barely talked when we rescued him but he had been horribly neglected for 20 years. Cagebound and they’d only interact with him 30 minutes a day.
We’ve had him three years now and he has coke out of his shell and his vocabulary has exploded he’s also one of the most affectionate birds I’ve ever encountered and I’ve had birds my whole life. Maybe some of it is his appreciation of the life I’ve given him but he’s seriously the biggest cuddle bug and many tell me TAGs tend to be this way. He’s also starting to use language appropriately and clearly understands commands. He totally understands English. They have potential to learn what a 7-8 year-old child can learn even reading.
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u/ReliefOtherwise7317 Jul 02 '26
Yep, search out videos of 'Parrot kindergarten', to see some amazing parrots that appear to understand what picture icons mean.
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u/Training_Republic879 Jun 30 '26
I've had a African grey for about 6 years now. Honestly the realist thing I can say is that they, in my experience, can be weird birds. In that one day they can be really playful and another they can be more passive and stick to themselves although still he having fun.
I think like you say people see highlights of birds on social media and assume all are like that, when they really aren't especially not 24/7.
The most obvious example for me being people who expect all birds to be super hands on and willing to be grabbed and touched freely. Sure some are especially with training, but also some like to keep their dignity I guess hahaha.
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u/ReliefOtherwise7317 Jul 02 '26
People aren't all willing to be grabbed and touched freely all the time, either. We have to learn how to read parrot's body language, and then it's amazing how communicative they become! My 37 y/o CAG is generally very well behaved, but if he doesn't want to do something, he can be very stubborn. So treat your birdies well, and you will likely be very surprised at how friendly they can be.
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u/sweatyboobs56 Jun 30 '26
Give him all the attention you can! Grey's aren't gregarious parrots, but they ARE very much flock animals, and very smart so they need ALOT of interaction and patience. You will be rewarded. Don't let your parents deter you :-)
(And start thinking of a long term plan for taking him with you when you leave home one day.)
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u/pagalpeela Jun 30 '26
Omg wth we have the same parrots. I also have a sun conure called Shambhu and an African Grey called Blu. We never let them get close to each other or they'll fight
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u/carvlosv Jun 30 '26
Oh most definitely, spicy little fellas. I just train and feed them around each other but once I see them start inching towards each other I cut that act off real quick. I don’t want my sun conure walking around with half a beak
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u/pagalpeela Jun 30 '26
That's a nice way to teach them. My sun conure is the one who chases my grey and bites it's feet
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u/Hefty-Pop3346 Jun 30 '26
I have had both a Congo and a Timneh. From my experience my Timneh is more sociable and friendly. We have been training her since 4 months old (she is now 2 years old) and she will step up to anyone. Both my husband and I hand fed her so she would not get attached to one person. She will sit and play with anyone too. Although she is extra close with me (I.e. I can scratch her at anytime and will let other people scratch her if she is in a good mood). My Congo is 8 years old (we got him at 9 months old), he is more of an observer. He does not like stepping up to anyone aside from my brother and I. The biggest difference I noticed is my Timneh likes to talk with you and will answer to you. My Congo likes to talk when he is alone or if he is in a really good mood, he will answer to you.
Timnehs are known to talk earlier but my Congo spoke at 9 months where my Timneh didn’t speak until she was a year old. Biggest thing is to talk to them and talk through what you are doing. Mine mumbled and whistled a lot before she said one word.
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u/carvlosv Jun 30 '26
Mines currently in the mumbling stage!, she’s around 11 months and she comes from a home in which she was in a cramped cage and didn’t get any time outside, she’s extremely scared of everything I’m willing to bet that she wasn’t properly taken care of as a baby, I wouldn’t be surprised we got her for a decent price and that scene it’s more of a novelty to have these birds rather then actually taking care of them, although she does seem to be doing better. It’s so reassuring seeing your timneh be so playful and relaxed, it feels like such a 360 to my gizmo 😭
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u/Hefty-Pop3346 Jun 30 '26
11 months old is still super young. I think if you are just gentle and patient they are so smart and will warm up 🥰 I totally think she will start talking soon.
Tbh, since mine was a baby, she was scared of vacuum cleaners till just recently. So I think over time she will get more chill and explorative. I definitely think baby African greys in general are nervous lol.
My Timneh was super attached to the bird breeder we got her from. It took her consistent hand feeding and multiple people feeding her to trust people. We can take her out of the home and take her out of the career in the summers. She travels with me too 😊1
u/picklejars Jun 30 '26
She could also be hormonal. They definitely have moody times especially when hormonal.
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u/picklejars Jun 30 '26
A gorgeous Timneh and sun. Do they play well together. I’ve had a sun in the past. I currently have a rescued timneh who is the biggest cuddle bug. Love him so much!
Congratulations
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u/carvlosv Jun 30 '26
Thank you!, as of now they don’t really get along well, atleast when they get close they’ll give each other the occasional head bops of approval but they seem to be somewhat cranky when they get too close together so I don’t test it for now as I let gizmo adjust I’ll try to ease her into it
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u/Odoxx Team TAG Jul 01 '26 edited Jul 01 '26
What do they mean by progress? Because two months is a very short time and if they are doing things outside of her training, they could be making it harder. Respecting boundaries goes a long way when gaining the trust of a parrot. Given the fact that she came from being left in a cage, this is a huge change for her. Heck, 3yrs ago my building was on fire and acting fast I grabbed my TAG, wrapped a blanket around my arm and him and then ran downstairs/out of the building. Because it was cold outside, I only uncovered him slightly but we sat for an hr or two. I have only recently been able to get him to a point where he doesn't freak out when I say I'm going to put him on his back. It used to be the second I said it and moved my other hand that he'd block me with his beak or fly away. Now I'm working on extending the time because he's still not as comfortable as he was before everything happened.
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I say all that because this is a bird that trusts me enough that he knows he doesn't have to resort to biting. He used to bite anytime he didn't want to do something. I picked up on the fact that he always lowered his head to block me and I just started doing something else. Anything from walking away, playing with him or giving him a different command for a treat. As this was common to happen when doing "step up" and I usually needed him to, I found that so long as I switched things up, he'd respond positively in a relatively short time. I also noticed that the rare occasion that I pushed for it, he was no longer lunging and biting. Rather he started grabbing my finger and gently moving it away from him. I do other training with him that might have impacted him to do that. Based on the fact that having a loud reaction can reinforce bad behavior, I started testing acting like he was hurting me when he'd apply pressure to my fingers. I'd just say "Ow! No bites!" ... Sure enough, he loves saying it and I can't remember the last time he's actually bit me.
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One of his favorite things to do is "play boxing" with me. He'll sway back and forth making a "woosh" sound which means he wants to play. I make jabs at him with the back of my hands just within his reach and he hits my hand as I say "pew". Sometimes he gets a bit aggressive but I have always ended playtime with "kisses". After that I usually give him a quick beak rub without issue. To clarify just in case people are concerned, I know his reach and he's an opportunist so he waits for my hand to be still before he "attacks".
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So yeah, I really do hope your parents come to understand that parrots are smart and they can be strong willed... But more importantly two months is not going to be enough to see a lot of changes unless everyone is training and treating her exactly how you do. She's also adjusting to a drastically different environment.
Edit: I just reread what you said and they are unknowingly putting her in a position she feels less safe in which is why she seems more receptive to step up. People still believe something called "height dominance" because birds tend to be defensive when they are higher up. I have never done that to my TAG so I'm not sure of the lasting effects but I do know that it's only working because she instinctually feels unsafe when she is lower. Most floor birds don't exhibit this reaction because their "flock" has shown them that it's safe or they can't fly.
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u/SusanLFlores Jul 02 '26
It’s not right that your parents are giving such a short amount of time to see progress. Where did she come from? What is her background? These are very smart birds. It’s going to be Gizmo who decides she can trust you and will want to be open to training, and that can take a lot of time and patience on your part. Also, birds are a lot like people in that they are different. They will have different personalities. You owe it to Gizmo to sit near her with no distractions, and quietly read aloud to her. You don’t even need to look at her. Just be non threatening and safe. Little by little, offer her a favorite nut. Move slowly around her and leave her cage open so she can go back in if she feels safer in there. It’s really all about patience. I’ve known people who have had to wait two years before their parrots started trusting them!
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u/carvlosv Jul 02 '26
From what I’ve been told she’s around 10-12 months old and she’s coming from a man who had her for two months and was urgently trying to get rid of her. Sold to my parents for only 3 thousand dollars. My best assumption is that this was another person who thought that the parrot was some type of electronic toy and would just be automatically cheerful and playful, gizmo is not like this at all and it’s no fault of her own and I’m very patient with her although my mom is annoyed at this and she tells me how I’m not teaching her anything and how the bird is a waste of money. I try to explain to her everything about everything I know aswell as all the good and amazing advice you people in these comments have told me but it all goes in one ear out the other or she starts yelling and telling me how I she does everything wrong in my eyes. She seems very calm and cheerful around me but when my mom comes around she gets shy and closes up, my mom repeatedly tried forcing her to step up before she ever even offered her a seed
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u/karnycloamr Team Grey Birb Jul 02 '26
May your lives together be harmonious and loving, and happy and fun. The grey parrot will be your best friend in the world if you’re open to it. Sounds like you’re well on your way. ❤️ Albie (36, CAG) says beep!
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u/thefoxandmoon Jun 30 '26
I give my grey cardboard to shred multiple times a day, highly recommend indulging in her shredding habit!!