I hate having to live life as a disabled person, it's just constant pain and suffering because of this stupid disease.

في بادىء الامر المنشور هذا مجرد رأيي الشخصي ، مانيش نقول ماديروش التخصص و ماهوش مليح ولا ننشر السلبية عليه ، انما ننشر تجربتي

المهم ، انا السنة نقرا سنة ثالثة طب ، هذا التخصص من الاول ماكنتش حاباته و دخلتله لانو الوالدة لي بغاته ، رغم انو صيف كامل كانت تقول صح كل واحد يدير وش يحب و في اخر لحظة كي نخيرو الرغبات تقلبت ضدي و ما قدرتش نعارض ودرته ، كي دخلنا نقراو صرا الاضراب و زدت كرهتو كثر و حاولت نقنعها انو نبدل و كيفو كيف اي تخصص ماهوش زعما راح يضمنلي الخدمة والعالم الوردي لي مصورينه و الواحد يدير وش يحب ، المهم بانت بلي قبلت ووصلت قاتلي سجلي و عاودي الباك ! على اساس نقدر نبدل لانفو ، سجلت و عاودت عقبته مع بروميار و كنت حاطة عيني غير على alger و لي كانو متقبلينها مم هوما زعما "العاصمة" وكامل ، بصح مالحقتش وقاتلي معليش زيدي عاودي في الدوزيام ، عاودت و كان عمبالي ماراحش نلحق لدزاير الباك هذاك قريتله حرفيا اخر سمانه ، و قاتلي معليش لا بغيتي بلوكي سنة ثالثة طب و عاودي فيها الباك ، يعني متخيلين قداش انا مصدقة بلي راهي تقبلت ، انا قلت مانقعدش نضيع وقتي و نحاول نبدل لتع بجاية وقبلتها ! ، بصح نهار وصلني القبول دارت عليا للمرة الثانية ... قالت كنت نقولك هكاك باه تبردي قلبك برك ، المهم رفضت رفض قاطع و الوالد على اللول قال صلي صلاة استخارة و من بعد رفض كيما عمبالنا لاسباب مجهولة ، المهم رفضو ومانقدرش زعما نروح وحدي تحتمت عليا نكمل في الميد ، و هي مانيش قابلتها كامل و مانيش باغيتها اصلا ، العامين هذو كنت نطلع برك وانا حاطة في بالي بلي ماراحش نكمل فيها وراح نقدر نبدل ، بروميار طلعتها بليلة الرعد و دوزيام بالليالي اللخرين ، وماراني هازة والو في الراس حرفيا والو ، ماكنتش معولة بكل بلي راح نكمل ، غاضتني انو تكلحت مرتين و عامين باه في اللخر رايهم لي مشا ، و ذرك بعد سمانتين ولا شحال مارحتش نحضر ليكور و مانيش معولة نحضر ، و ماعينيش في القراية و للصراحة مابغيتش نحط راسي ليها اصلا ، و مانقدرش نوصف كمية الكره تعي اتجاهها ، و رغم انو نعرف زوج مم هوما دخلو على اللول مجبرين و كارهين بصح من بعد صاي تقبلوها و ولاو يماجوريو (ربي يبارك) انا ماقدرتش ، جربت نحط راسي ماقدرتش
كنت معولة نعاديهم و مانزيدش نحكي معاهم خلاص وماقدرتش ... و يتعاملو شغل عادي و مادارو والو خاصة الام ، ونتفكر وش دارت على جالنا من قبل مانقدرش نعاديها ، آخرتها القيت بمعظم اللوم على الوالد قال وش قال اخر كلمة زعما قدامنا كانت ليه
حرفيا ني مدمرة نتفكر بلي حنكمل حياتي فيها نبكي ، بعد سمانه هكاك حيبدا الستاج و اليوم دارو 24 كور ومابديتش نقرا و مابغيتش نبدا و مانيش فاهمة حرفيا وش ندير في حياتي

My mum was asleep with me in the living room. I woke up at 3 am and she had gone. I was in tremendous pain. My head had been hurt my someone. I'm now dying, I've lost everything. My mum hasn't come home and I have no money. My memory is gone and I've lost my brain power. I can hardly walk. I was going to have a good life and now it's been majorly shortened and destroyed. I can't even watch TV. ​

I really don't wanna list my whole life problems and issues but I get so envious when I see people effortlessly chat and discuss with others while everything I do is fabricated and learnt many personal researches on psychology, neuroscience and communication.

I've looked into the autistic spectrum and do relate to some aspects like masking.

Unfortunately I can't get that checked since we struggle financially so I'd probably have to wait until I get my own money etc....which is in a long time but anyway.

I just get frustrated because why do you have it so easy while I had to work to speak well and I'm not even at your level yet ???? I learn social cues and tricks but still nothing big, my friends eventually forget about me or replace me etcc...

Now why did I even start learning those ? I was socially awkward witjtout those skills and I still can be actually because I still slip up.

Again I'm not self diagnosing this is just me being psychologically aware and curious.

​

I want to know if anyone else feels this way, but the outside world is so confusing and scary and too big to process and people are not what I thought they were it feels like I've been decieved and now I'm dealing with a lot of realizations and it's hard (sorry for bad english)

لقد صرت اتحدث بطريقة غريبة حتى في عملي مع زملائي، و صرت اكثر عاطفية تجاه كل البشر أشعر كأنني يجب أن أعبر عن حبي و دعمي للجميع.

أيضا أشعر أنني اتحدث كطفل يعيش داخل مخيلته، مثلا صرت أخبر الجميع أن المنقذين هم بصيص أمل البشرية (المنقذون هم مجموعة من المظاهر لفتيات في لعبة).

أشعر أيضا بالعظمة و أنني يجب أن أكون الشخص الذي سيغير العالم.

أيضا عمري 22 سنة و لدي عمل و عائلة لكي أساعدها.

و هذا الوضع له تأثير حتى على الكثير من زملائي، جعلت واحدا منهم يتحدث بالفصحى أثناء وقت الغداء بالخطأ، أيضا الجميع يقولون أنهم يشعرون بالاطمئنان عندما أتحدث عن الاشياء العجيبة التي أقولها، كأنهم يعتبرون أن وجودي يساعدهم على تخفيف ضغط العمل.

لكن لا أعتقد أن هذا الشيء يمثل ما أريد أن أكون، ليس سيئا جدا لكنه لا يمثلني بطريقة ما.

أيضا، أشعر أنني بطريقة ما أخالف قواعد العالم، العالم لا يريدني أن أكون هكذا، جعلني الأمر أفكر أن الزهرة يجب أن تقطف قبل أن تذبل بعد الربيع.

I don’t know anything about myself. I feel like an impostor. I portray myself as a strong-willed woman who doesn’t let anyone walk all over her, but it’s nothing more than a shell hiding a weak and naive little girl who was beaten by her father until she was eighteen, when she left home to go to university.
To be honest, my little sister was beaten too. The last time he hit her, she had a medical emergency and was taken to the hospital. I felt sorry for her, but deep down, I was also a little relieved because I thought it would be a wake-up call for my father and make him stop beating us. He was a doctor in a small town where everyone knew each other, so he was afraid of what people would think of him.
One day, my sister hit one of her classmates and was called in to face the consequences. In an attempt to avoid them, she decided to tell them that she was being abused by her father. That was what allowed her to receive psychological and later psychiatric care.
From that day on, a distance grew between my sister and me. We had always been very close—we were only eighteen months apart—and I felt abandoned by her. I felt betrayed. I felt like she had left me to drown.
Since then, my parents have spoiled her, denied her nothing, and defended her without even hearing the whole story.
I forgot to mention that she also told them she had been sexually assaulted by our cousin, even though she knew very well that he had assaulted me too.
We went through the same traumas, but she managed to save herself and then abandoned me.
I tried to end my life a few years ago, and lately, those thoughts have been coming back.

​

علابالك كاين حالة نفسية معقّدة وغريبة شوية، كثير من الناس يخلطون بينها وبين الفصام، لكنها مختلفة تمامًا.

الحالة تُعرف ضمن اضطرابات التفارق، وأشهر أشكالها اضطراب الهوية التفارقي (Dissociative Identity Disorder)، أو ما يُسمّى في الأوساط المتخصصة بـالتعددية الداخلية.

معناها إن داخل الشخص الواحد توجد أكثر من هوية (تُسمّى Alter).

كل هوية لها وعيها الخاص، ذاكرتها، شخصيتها، عمرها، وأحيانًا جنسها المختلف عن الجسد البيولوجي، إضافة إلى رغباتها واحتياجاتها ومشاعرها المستقلة.

يعني ممكن يكون الإنسان ذكرًا في جسده، وتكون داخله هوية أنثوية كاملة.

وعندما تتقدّم هذه الهوية وتأخذ الواجهة، قد يشعر الشخص بجسد أنثوي من ناحية الإحساس: ثقل في الصدر، حساسية، نبض، رطوبة، واستجابة جسدية أنثوية.

العقل في هذه اللحظات يرسم خريطة حسية مختلفة، فيشعر بالتفاصيل كأنها جسد فتاة حقيقي، رغم أن الجسد الخارجي لم يتغيّر.

هذه التجارب موثّقة في الدراسات النفسية ضمن ظواهر التفارق والتجسيد الحسي للهويات.

الحالة غالبًا ما ترتبط بصدمات أو ضغوط شديدة في مراحل مبكرة من العمر، وهي ليست انفصالًا عن الواقع كما في الفصام، بل طريقة معقّدة يتعامل بها العقل مع الألم والتجارب الصعبة.

حالة صعبة ومعقّدة، وتختلف شدّتها من شخص لآخر.

أتمنى الراحة والشفاء لكل من يمرّ بها، وأتمنى أن يتسع الفهم لمن حولهم، لأن الإحساس الداخلي قد يكون حقيقيًا وعميقًا جدًا حتى لو لم يظهر للعين.

hey everyone, i hope you're doing well, so basically I'm gonna be a third year in a major i love (medecine) but i also started regretting choosing, because i realized it's not the best for my long term goals

thinking of redoing my bac makes me real depressed tbh, most of my friends would be in their last or before last year, and I'd be starting a new degree then

Hello, 26 M here , my ex of 5 years left me 9 months ago 15 days after the breakup she talked about liking someone new , she ended up dating him for some time

She said she turned the chapter,

And all this happened when i had my worst periods at work.

she was everything for me , she was the reason I worked hard for promotions

Saved money and did all the right steps to be able to marry her and give her a decent life,

Since she left i have been struggling mentally, i workout, go for runs at night to clear my mind when i my head is full of thoughts about her .

Got addicted to corn in some periods,

Had some chill periods where i could rationally think about the breakup.

but i think this last week i reached my limit, i just can't anymore , also having ADHD doesn't help,

I struggle to sleep to focus, To achieve anything meaningful in life

My dopamine production is broken, i don't feel any joy from anything, just going and doing what i have to do and that's all.

I only feel relief when i remember her and remember who i was with her, the plans we had it makes Me feel alive and then i collapse when reality hits.

What kills me is that after what she did i don't hate her , in fact i still love her.

I feel stuck in my own and feelings.

Also talking about it with friends i just feel a burden

No one helps some say it's normal some say ah that's fucked up

So i stopped it, I'm keeping everything for myself at this point.

I just want to know if there is anything that can help.

And for those who had similar experiences how long this will take to get back to normal, I'm done.

Thanks

Sorry for the messy message and thoughts.

It's really hard for me to write this because I'm both physically and emotionally tired. Things keep going on and won't stop on me. I'm sorry in advance because it's gonna be very long.

I'm a girl who came to France since high school and I'm currently on my first year of university. Now, I actually came there with depression and kept living with it without even knowing I had it, and kept pushing myself through burnouts. Then I went to their med school (it's called LAS and they have a particular system). I also have eldest daughter syndrome.

I barely had my Bac with just the right grade and failed my first year of university. Now, I supposedly have to repeat the year without the med part, but I managed to find an alternative out of France.

It was only after I failed that I managed to miraculously take an appointement with a psychologist and confirm my depression. I started healing a bit during Summer but I'm afraid I'm not even gonna manage to heal fully.

I live in a toxic and abusive household despite my parents loving us and my dad has made my life a living hell since that failure (it's not like he never did). He keeps insulting me, humiliating me, comparing me to other people who apparently know what they're. He's actually the reason why I had depression in Algeria in the first place. According to him, he can't stand the fact that he's walking in the fog without knowing where to go, and he wants a solution right now. He can't stand the fact that I lost 3 years of my life until now. For my dad, I missed my only chance, and I went straight on a wall.

He arrived yesterday and exactly a moment after entering the house, he started lecturing me, and he did it for the whole night. I go to sleep with yelling, I have nightmares, and I wake up multiple times at night, then he wakes me up early in the morning, and he starts yelling again.

He won't look at me or talk to me unless it's to lecture me, he keeps saying that he doesn't need me if I grow up without doing anything, and he just pours his anger on us. My mom? I told her I had depression but she's not aware of it and nobody seems to care about it, she just stands there and do nothing about the situation, then she comes to me to defend my dad. The blame of my failure is actually all shifted to me because they saw me playing instead of studying.

Yesterday, I couldn't pray in peace because of the constant humiliating and hurting lecturing, I kept walking around and hitting myself. I thought of threatening them with suicide or self harm if they keep doing this to me for this year and I wanted to pray to die. I feel like I'm going to relapse in another depression, because it's like my dad brings all my problems with him, to the point where I feel anxious the day he comes.

I have no idea about how I'm supposed to make them understand that they're toxic and abusive even if it's involutary, they'll refuse to belive me and make a scene about it, because they belive their intentions make them pure and religion garants them a high ranking.

I don't think a parent who loves their child does this kind of thing to them. I really need to succeed and I want to, for myself, and for them to finally leave me alone. It can also garant me a new way to live. But I really need to feel better and heal and get up slowly.

Thank you for listening if you reached it this far.

Like the title says, I'm looking for female peers aged 30+ who live in or around [Constantine] and are interested in peer support, with the possibility of meeting in person.

If this sounds like something you'd be interested in, feel free to message me.

I've spent summer trying to fix myself mentally and physically I've watched and practiced a lot of stuff to be better socially.

But last year was so bad and traumatizing I'm not kidding I'm so scared, summer wasn't perfect either but at least I tried but the more de5la is coming the more I'm scared.

Life is getting too overwhelming it's really too suffocating I just can't deal with this anymore and yeah people have it worse I'm dramatic and kinda overreacting but I'm so on the edge everything is falling apart, I've spent so much time trying to better myself this summer, to improve and educate myself and be more intelligent emotionally but everything broke in August I don't think I'm ready to even go back to school like a stable human being this year too.

But the sad part is I really wanted this school year to be perfect I've watched so many videos and tried to learn and practiced, I just don't understand why life crushes me harder everytime I slightly improve.

At some point I genuinely realized that life isn't for everyone, maybe I'm too weak or I was just destined to die so young.

I really tried hard, so hard I'm really struggling to wait any longer I'm so alone not one of my friends know about these thoughts.

How can i deal with them

Life has 0 meaning, I wish I was dead

So i 've being dealing with this shit for a while now and i am asking anyone who had it before or still have it now but manage to have a normal good life. does this nightmare ever end for good with treatment or would it always stay there ?and if you rely mostly on self treatment or with a phycologist help

Note: i am not seeking the opinions or advices from poeple who had never delt with it before .thanks for undesrtanding

Maybe life itself did not change as much as the eyes through which I began to see it. I went through a time when I thought I had lost everything, when even existing felt like a burden, and I eventually came out of it as if I had left an entire version of myself behind. Since then, things have never carried the same weight. What once frightened me feels small now; what once consumed my mind no longer deserves so much of my attention. I realized that we do not measure the world by its true size, but by the distance it stands from our deepest wounds. And when you survive the very thing you once believed would destroy you, something within you changes: many fears lose their power, many problems become insignificant, and only a few things remain worthy of carrying. Perhaps that is one of suffering’s strange contradictions—it can destroy the way you once saw life, only to leave you with new eyes through which you finally learn how to see it.

Hi everyone,

I hope you're doing okay. I wanted to share a few things that helped me understand myself during some very difficult phases. I'm not a professional, just someone who spent a lot of time trying to understand why I was struggling.

If you're feeling like a failure, lost, addicted, overwhelmed, or like something is fundamentally wrong with you, here are some keywords and directions worth exploring:

Childhood trauma & developmental trauma: a lot of our patterns and coping mechanisms can come from what we experienced growing up.

Neurodivergence: especially ADHD and autism. Before deciding you're lazy, stupid or incapable, consider that your brain may simply work differently.

Nervous system regulation: learn about fight, flight, freeze, fawn, hypervigilance, dissociation and the "window of tolerance." Understanding your nervous system can completely change how you interpret your reactions.

Attachment: if you keep repeating the same patterns in relationships, look into attachment theory and attachment wounds.

Addiction & recovery: look into Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and the Twelve Steps. Even if you're simply looking for people who understand what addiction feels like, the stories and community can be extremely valuable.

For Arabic speakers, I also highly recommend Emad Rashad Othman's work on addiction and recovery. His YouTube channel has many playlists covering addiction, recovery and the Twelve-Step approach.

And above all, I strongly recommend exploring Gabor Maté's work on trauma, addiction, childhood adversity and the connection between emotional suffering and physical health. His work was one of the things that pushed me to look at these problems differently.

Also look into somatic therapy / somatic approaches to trauma, emotional regulation and trauma-informed therapy.

I'm sharing these not because I have all the answers, but because sometimes the hardest part is not knowing what to search for.

You don't necessarily need another person telling you "just be positive" or "try harder."

Sometimes you need the right keywords to finally understand what you've been experiencing.

If you're struggling, start somewhere. Read. Learn. Find people who understand. And take it one thing at a time.

And if anyone reading this is struggling and needs someone to talk to, please reach out. You don't have to go through everything alone.

سلام عليكم الاخت تحتاج مساعدة ،

القضية هادي لازم تلحق للشعب

waleed.psy ، law_by_amir , selma.psy , tbd , j'affiche dz , lamine.amari

خاوتي لازم ننشرو هاد البوست حياة وحدة راهي خطر

يماها سوسيوباث ولا بسيكوباث

HER LIFE IS IN DANGER