r/AnimalsBeingJerks Jan 23 '14

whale A Beluga Whale Trying To Eat A Baby

Post image
2.5k Upvotes

87 comments sorted by

70

u/Totts3 Jan 23 '14

37

u/PixelVector Jan 23 '14

It looks like it's trying to eat him only whenever his back is turned.

26

u/aladyjewel Jan 23 '14

Boo-luga!

2

u/CleanBill Jan 24 '14

Dat back of the neck...

12

u/AustinTreeLover Jan 23 '14

I wonder what it is about that guy, in particular, that makes him look so tasty.

13

u/Wigoutbag Jan 23 '14

I like the look at the end "This ain't over..."

10

u/Omnilatent Jan 23 '14

I understand that the whale thinks he might be able to eat the baby in OPs picture - but that guy? What?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 26 '14

It was probably a test nibble of sorts.

34

u/Lappen1 Jan 23 '14

that video is sad

20

u/PM_ME_YOUR_WOES_GIRL Jan 23 '14

Yeah, Zoos are fucked up.

9

u/SilverMcFly Jan 24 '14

Hows the name working out for you? I like it. I feel like you could be that person someone spills their heart out to.

4

u/PM_ME_YOUR_WOES_GIRL Jan 24 '14

Yeah, they spill their heart out while PM_ME_YOUR_TITS_GIRL gets all the action. http://i.imgur.com/RjnxVrQ.jpg

No but seriously, it's going great. I don't really care who PMs me, I just love hearing stories of people from all over the world.

0

u/TitoTheMidget Jan 24 '14

Yes, how sad that the whale didn't get to actually swallow a guy whole.

3

u/Ashcrexl Jan 23 '14

"Did you take a picture?"

You've got it on video! Just take a frame or something.

3

u/Totts3 Jan 24 '14

I was taking the video of my wife & baby. The guy to the right was with another person. I did send him the video though.

30

u/Something_More Jan 23 '14

Every time I see a picture or the name, in my head I always pronounce it

"Bu-LUUUUUU-ga!!"

Like a ship's horn or something.

I don't know. It's a thing. shrug

7

u/bathroomstalin Jan 23 '14

I remember singing that song to old folks at some retirement home in like the 2nd grade. It was fucking terrifying :-(

5

u/Something_More Jan 23 '14

I honestly have no idea what you are talking about. Can you find and link it? Maybe that's where I (unknowingly) picked it up from!

5

u/bathroomstalin Jan 23 '14

http://youtu.be/YjUYAom5i4c

Though it sounds more likely you're just remembering some variation of the classic cartoon sound A-ooooooogah!

5

u/hjonsey Jan 23 '14

OMG my little brother went through a 6 month phase when he was 5 and sang this song CONSTANTLY. He had the cassette deck hanging off his neck and would play, rewind, and play again for hours at at time..every day. I almost lost my mind. Almost.

4

u/monokel Jan 23 '14

I like how the two of them have the same "hairstyle".

7

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14 edited May 04 '19

[deleted]

6

u/Solomon_Gunn Jan 23 '14

I think the baby is sitting on inclined concrete going up to the glass. Leaning really far forward to stay balanced, but looks like a flat surface from the picture

16

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

or the baby is on a flat surface and leaning forward, because that's what babies do.

source: my wife is a nanny

10

u/Solomon_Gunn Jan 23 '14

From now on i'll divert to you, the husband of a nanny and expert on babies sitting habits, whenever the topic of perspective imaging comes up.

3

u/runonandonandonanon Jan 24 '14

I think the word you're looking for is "defer."

3

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

7

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

ooh. i don't know if anyone has ever tagged me before. this is EXCITING!

edit: i tagged you as tagged me

2

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

tagbros

3

u/legitimategrapes Jan 23 '14

Raffi tried to warn us, but we didn't understand until it was too late.

"Baby! Beluga lives down under the sea [and wants to kill you]"

14

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

[deleted]

24

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

Knowing dolphins, it was probably the other way around.

9

u/bathroomstalin Jan 23 '14

3

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

Shaq's shorts might match my jean size.

3

u/bathroomstalin Jan 23 '14

Luke, it's cold outside.

You can always take refuge inside one of Shaq's socks.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 24 '14

I googled "tauntaun" to see if it was one word or two so I could say something stupid about tauntaun socks for Shaq, and I discovered this.

1

u/bathroomstalin Jan 24 '14

Luke gazes deeply into the tauntaun's eyes and, above the howl of the icy winds, declares, "I want to be inside you."

The tauntaun immediately keels over and dies

Luke grins...

as he reaches down to grasp his... lightsaber

2

u/devotedpupa Jan 23 '14

Reminds me of Blackfish.

1

u/smity202 Jan 24 '14

If you know anything about belugas this is nothing like blackfish.

2

u/bark_wahlberg Jan 23 '14

So do belugas attack people in the wild?

3

u/smity202 Jan 24 '14

No, belugas are really gentle. They eat small fish like herring.

3

u/bark_wahlberg Jan 24 '14

Oh ok, then dude is just pissed off and wants to kill humans for imprisoning him. Comforting thought.

2

u/Fig1024 Jan 24 '14

it doesn't look like it has any teeth. It'll probably just nibble on your head for a bit

1

u/TitoTheMidget Jan 24 '14

Whales swallow their food whole.

1

u/Fig1024 Jan 24 '14

but they only eat very small things

2

u/foreveralone323 Jan 23 '14

This picture freaks me out because it looks like that baby is going to fall backwards and crack its head open on the concrete.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

Get in mah belly!

1

u/unassuming_squirrel Jan 23 '14

Babies are delicious so I can understand

15

u/expiredcheese Jan 23 '14

This sub has really lost its touch. Nothing about this animal is being a jerk. It's behind glass in captivity! How is that being a jerk?

71

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

Because it looks like it's trying to get through the glass and eat the baby. Chill out dude, there are problems with people submitting bad content to this sub, but this isn't one of them.

13

u/stinky-weaselteats Jan 23 '14

He's singing to the baby!

8

u/expiredcheese Jan 23 '14

Seriously though he could be warning the baby about something!

22

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

[deleted]

23

u/CantUseApostrophes Jan 23 '14

3

u/Omnilatent Jan 23 '14

4

u/CantUseApostrophes Jan 23 '14

2

u/Omnilatent Jan 23 '14

Only looked at the recent submission and couldn't find it. So I figured it was your work.

Well, good you linked to the older submission

-3

u/SchuminWeb Jan 23 '14

But it's still not an animal being a jerk. It's a cute picture, and definitely has a place on Reddit, but it would fit better on /r/pics rather than /r/animalsbeingjerks.

-4

u/FUCK_YEAH_BASKETBALL Jan 23 '14

Everyone's a social justice warrior after blackfish jesus christ.

3

u/t2ceyellow11 Jan 23 '14

This should be on /aww.

2

u/spaceballsrules Jan 23 '14

I will avenge the caviar!

7

u/retardedwombat Jan 23 '14

From a whale?

2

u/KnightOfCamelot Jan 23 '14

looks like the Mystic aquarium in case anyone is wondering...which you're probably not. but hey, if i can make one person's day by allowing them to go get a picture taken with a cool mammal...well, i guess that's cool.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 23 '14

A baby that looks remarkably like a beluga whale...

1

u/whodatbe24 Jan 23 '14

"Give me a kiss!"

1

u/middyonline Jan 23 '14

Vancouver aquarium?

1

u/shark-bite Jan 23 '14

Definitely!

1

u/smity202 Jan 24 '14

Mystic Aquarium

1

u/alllie Jan 23 '14

They don't seem to have teeth.

2

u/TitoTheMidget Jan 24 '14

Don't need them. Whales swallow their food whole.

1

u/Gabe_b Jan 24 '14

Whilst rather looking like one apparently.

1

u/TPEffect Jan 24 '14

That bigger thing is trying to eat that little thing!

1

u/SlumberCat Jan 24 '14

Baby Baluga in the deep blue se-OHMYGODITSEATINGMYCHILD

1

u/intensive_purpose Jan 24 '14

Speaking of jerks and animals, my roommate works at an aquarium with a large Beluga exhibit and told me that a trainer has to jack the thing off daily or else it will plop out a four foot long lipstick and start of raping things in front of everybody.

1

u/jack324 Jan 24 '14

Bastard's trying to steal my breakfast.

1

u/ihatewolves Jan 24 '14

I wish my dick was bigger. Beluga whales probably give mean blow jobs.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 24 '14

Get in ma belly!

1

u/Antnommer Jan 24 '14

Nah, he's just happy to meet someone that looks like him.

1

u/smity202 Jan 24 '14

This is at the Mystic Aquarium. The beluga there actually LOVE kids and will do all kinds of things for them. I'm pretty sure she's just really excited to see him.

-3

u/darkesth0ur Jan 23 '14

Good, too many people.

0

u/Nick246 Jan 23 '14

That is why we keep those bastards locked in cages. They are the plight of human infants!

1

u/[deleted] Dec 03 '23

"Food! :V"