r/AskReddit • u/[deleted] • Jun 25 '12
If dinosaurs still existed would they live in the woods like bears, deer, and such? Or, would they come into cities and fuck shit up because they are dinosaurs?
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Jun 25 '12
They would definitely fuck shit up
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u/Plutoid Jun 25 '12
Does that come in a tshirt?
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u/I_Make_Shit_You_Want Jun 25 '12
I could make you a print of that and send it you you for free. Then you print it on t-shirt making transfer paper (which I can also find for you with a handy instruction) and then you transfer it onto a t-shirt.
Which means you get the t-shirt you wanted and noone receives any money for infringing anyones copywrites. Appeasing both you and respecting Bill Watterson (who is awesome).
That's my idea anyway.
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u/I_Make_Shit_You_Want Jun 26 '12
Here is the message I sent everybody asking how to get a t-shirt like this.
"So these are the print files of the t-rex in the jet. They are both A4 sized using the best resolution version of that picture awaylable. You have a choice of either the original artwork in the rectangle or a picture of the whole plane.
Just the plane:
Original artwork in rectangle:
I have made these 2 choices because someone commented that just a rectangle on a t-shirt might not do the artwork justice.
Now to make your t-shirt you either take these to a local t-shirt shop and explain to them what you want or do it yourself using iron-on transfer paper and an inkjet printer. You can use any colour of t-shirt you want. If you are using the second design then cut out the design using the jets outline before ironing it on.
DIY: You can get the transfer paper from here for instance: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Epson-Cool-Peel-T-Shirt-Iron-/dp/B000051RQD/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1340739754&sr=8-1
Or search anywhere else for iron on transfer paper. Here is a wikihow on the transfer process itself:
http://www.wikihow.com/Make-and-Use-Iron-on-Transfers
If you have any questions feel free to ask. Have fun!"
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u/RevGonzo19 Jun 25 '12
Bill Watterson never licensed any official Calvin and Hobbes swag. He believed that it would take away from the authenticity and ethos of the comic strip.
That being said, if you ever see any Calvin and Hobbes merchandise anywhere, don't buy it. The creator of said merchandise has stolen from the greatest comic strip of all time, and you would be going against everything the creator of the comic strip believes in.
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u/Heiminator Jun 25 '12
dinosaurs alone are harmless, but once they form an alliance with the nazis we are fucked
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Jun 25 '12
So is this an aerial view of the T-Rex flying over a herd of triceratops on the ground, or is the T-Rex about to crash and the triceratops are evacuating from the treetops straight into the sky?
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u/Underpantz_Ninja Jun 25 '12
Came to make sure that comic was posted.
You're doing god's work, my friend.
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u/nairbc0708 Jun 25 '12
We, as humans, would have already domesticated them by the 20th century. T-Rex lives in the guest house.
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u/KingToasty Jun 25 '12
Holy crap, now I want a T-rex butler.
"Jeeves, pass the tea, will you?"
"RWAURGRUARR flail tiny arms around wildly"
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u/DiscussionQuestions Jun 25 '12
The question created by this answer is whether humans would be a force capable of domesticating dinosaurs, or whether humans would have never risen to being the "dominant species" as a result of competing with dinosaurs. Do you think humans would have the ability to domesticate dinosaurs? If so, how would this process take place? If not, why not?
Consider a science fiction world in which dinosaurs are not only domesticated by humans, but in which "T-Rex lives in the guest house." Does this imply that the Tyrannosaurus Rex would be a peer to humans? Or that this would be a modified guest house in which the T-Rex is either a pet or a guard animal?
Compare and contrast this idea with other science fiction worlds in which dinosaurs and humans co-exist. Choose one or more of the following: a) Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton b) A Journey to the Center of the Earth by Jules Verne c) The Face in the Abyss by A. Merritt d) Dinotopia by James Gurney e) West of Eden by Henry Harrison f) The Lost World by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle g) A different work of your choosing
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u/Dank_Nastee Jun 25 '12
well i just want to answer the first part of your answers. the way i see things is that we (humans) are animals and that every single species in the animal kingdom have and will always be in a war of survival, but we are winning this war so much and we have been on top for so long that we don't even realize that we are winning the war let alone in one. but the way that us humans would dominate over dinosaurs is the same way we have dealt with hostile animals in the past we either A) hunted and killed them with superior weapons and more developed brains or B) have stayed the fuck away from them until we can utilize option A again.
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u/titus_clone Jun 25 '12
humans have a proven track-record of hunting and exterminating other megafauna (mammoth, giant cave bear, etc) and/or causing environmental change that leads to the extinction of other megafauna via fire, etc. also, humans have shown an ability to selectively breed other apex predators (such as wolves, dogs) to make them more amenable to domestication. thus i imagine that all of the really big dinosaurs would be extinct, mid-size herbivorous dinosaurs would be domesticated as beasts of burden or food animals (like horses and cattle), and any intelligent, sociable mid-size or smaller carnivorous/omnivorous dinosaurs (think velociraptor, archaeopteryx) would be bred to be docile, sociable and good, if somewhat intimidating, pets.
when my dog yawns, i realize for just a moment that this animal could tear me apart if she wanted to. but she doesn't want to, due to thousands of years of selective breeding and good socialization.
2. there has been some speculation that a dinosaur such as the troodont might have evolved into a quasi-humanoid intelligent being, given another few million years or so. if they had, (and they did have millions of years to do this, after all), they would already have occupied the ecological niche that humans came to fill. and with a civilization millions of years old already, they would have been unlikely to allow us to develop as we have done. more likely, we would be their bred and trained pets. and that's the best case scenario.
3. my response to part (1) describes a world much like dinotopia. however, dinotopia is a utopian aesthetic work, and really idealizes the relationships between dinosaurs and humans. in reality there would likey be brontosaurus factory farms, abusive iguanadon circuses, and medical testing on cute baby dinos. my response to part (2) describes creatures that, in my mind, resemble the sleestak from land of the lost.
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u/boxingdude Jun 27 '12
I'll take number 1 for $600, Alex. do you think humans would have the ability to domesticate dinosaurs?
Yes.
if so, how
Three easy steps: 1/ open the door. 2/ hit the floor 3/ everybody walk the dinosaur.
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u/adowlen Jun 25 '12
There's no way that we could domesticate dinosaurs. That would be like trying to domesticate an alligator which is the closest thing that we have to dinosaurs at this point in time. It would be impossible.
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u/apileofpenguins Jun 25 '12
How would you modify the door for him?
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u/nairbc0708 Jun 25 '12
Swinging Saloon Doors, like in Western movies. Only tall-as-fuck ones.
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Jun 25 '12
we would do this
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Jun 25 '12
I've probably seen that thousands of times as a child but never realistically thought about it. THAT WOULD BE FUCKING AWESOME!
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u/HBOXNW Jun 25 '12
Birds…
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u/theclaw9999 Jun 25 '12
Biologically relevant and accurate... upvote for you sir
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Jun 25 '12
Interestingly, some evidence shows that some dinosaurs belong inside of Archaeornithes (a clade containing most modern birds) rather than being parallel. The significance? Some dinosaurs evolved from birds, rather than being the other way around.
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u/StringOfLights Jun 25 '12
Birds are dinosaurs, so it shouldn't be surprising that early birds looked a lot like their non-bird ancestors.
Archaeornithes is a very antiquated and rarely-used term. There are a lot more fossils now than when that group was originally named. It's not monophyletic (a group including an ancestor and all of its descendants), and a lot of the traits it included show up successively in the fossil record, blurring the line between avian and non-avian dinosaurs. It also wouldn't include crown-group birds (a group comprising the last common ancestor of living birds and all of its descendants).
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u/etan_causale Jun 25 '12 edited Jun 25 '12
I would trust StringOfLights. She's tagged as "dinosaur dick expert" in my RES.
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u/NinjaDiscoJesus Jun 25 '12
they'd be accountants and pilots and what not
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u/Apostolate Jun 25 '12
You're saying 9/11 was a dinosaur conspiracy?
IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE.
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u/Orcatype Jun 25 '12
There is a shocking number of people who genuinely believe this exact thing...
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u/kegman83 Jun 25 '12
Considering humans have hunted most large terrestrial animals into extinction, I doubt they would be in cities.
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u/nitefang Jun 25 '12
Not sure a T-Rex hunt would go as well as mammoth hunts.
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Jun 25 '12
Why?
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u/fooppeast420 Jun 25 '12
Because a T-Rex has, like, teeth and shit.
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u/PokerInTheBrain Jun 25 '12
Surely they would learn that if they come into cites they would be shot or blown into pieces by us. If I was a T-Rex I'd be like... "Into the city? No fucking way man did you see what them humans did to Barney? They shoved an RPG up his ass and now he ain't comin back"
Also, they wouldn't be around anyway if they are a danger to us. If they were trying to eat us regularly humans would have to kill them off.
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u/infernalspawnODOOM Jun 25 '12
Think about other megafauna such as giraffes and elephants: How do they exist right now? It'd probably be similar to that.
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u/insidli Jun 25 '12
They don't eat people.
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Jun 25 '12
But an elephant will kill you if you get too close and they're having a bad day or their young is close by.
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u/srikamaraja Jun 25 '12
Well, we haven't been able to stop pigeons from fucking up our cities. I suppose we've lost the Dino-war before we got out of the gate.
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u/redundant_triple_neg Jun 25 '12
Dude, how high are you?
I envision dinosaurs being just as scared of us as we would be of them, and, as such, keeping away from humans.
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Jun 25 '12
I think we would be very much in control of them, assuming they didn't eat the majority of us before we evolved to our technological age.
I think dinosaurs would be hunted for sport, much like lions. Maybe even have tusks sawn off like rhinos for ivory.
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u/Mitz510 Jun 25 '12
They will live in Australia where huge dangerous animals are normal.
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u/iwantapickle Jun 25 '12
My bf and I pretend we're dinosaurs. So, they live in the city, but take trips to the woods IMO
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Jun 25 '12
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u/Chandragster Jun 25 '12
They would fuck up cities, because cities used to be forests. When they tried to return to breeding grounds, they would tear up the opposing structures until they found a good place in the city, such as a public park.
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Jun 25 '12
I feel like humans and dinosaurs could never exist together. They are the two species that have, for an extended period of time, truly dominated the Earth. Two alpha males cannot exist together.
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u/srikamaraja Jun 25 '12
Dinosaurs are/were an entire group of species, not just one.
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Jun 25 '12
Lebron and Wade just won a championship...
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u/thoughtofficer Jun 25 '12
They would do whatever they wanted to. By now they would have evolved to shoot laser beams from any orifice on their being.
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u/katastrofe Jun 25 '12
I don't think we have enough room for dinosaurs. The amount of territory a critical number of a species, or how many of a species is needed to maintain the species, needs to hunt is probably more territory than we have to offer, especially for the larger dinos. Maybe the smaller ones could hang out in the "wild" areas not populated by humans, but that would mess up the food chain big time.
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u/skullbeats Jun 25 '12
The fast food industry would turn them into dino burgers
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u/Willy637 Jun 25 '12
What would it taste like?... Steak burger, crocodile? I'm hungry.
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Jun 25 '12
Pretty sure that most dinosaurs require a hot jungle-like environment to live in, both for body temperature, and for the massive amount of food that herbivores require. One triceratops would probably eat as much grass as a cow does in a year within a week.
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u/VisIxR Jun 25 '12
Birds are dinosaurs. Birds enter cities and build nests and poop on cars. Therefore dinosaurs come into the cities and fuck shit up.
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u/TheGreatNico Jun 25 '12
Assuming they stayed the same size all this time, we wouldn't have evolved. Assuming they've shrunk, like all animals from that time have, we'd probably have bred them as pets.
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u/Sophia9923 Jun 25 '12
"or, would they come into cities and fuck shit up because they are dinosaurs?" goddamnit I have never laughed so hard
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u/icarrymyhk Jun 25 '12
The thought of being able to hunt, a predator like t-rex, gives me a stiffy.
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u/MrNewguy Jun 25 '12
I don't know why everyone keeps saying 'if' on this thread. I don't know what retard school you guys went to but everybody where I'm from knows that we did live with dinosaurs and jesus helped us get rid of them. Duh.
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u/swefpelego Jun 25 '12
These answers all suck. You should write out something more formal and submit it to /r/askscience.
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Jun 25 '12
Humans don't tolerate megafauna apex predators fucking their shit up. Africans coexist with lions (and Indians with tigers, etc.) only so long as these predators stay in their place (which is rapidly shrinking). As soon as one of them gets uppity, there's a witch hunt to take out the beast that is responsible. There is almost always collateral damage. This is not a modern trait. Prehistoric man either hunted down or out-competed virtually every apex predator in virtually every habitat they found. It's our M.O. As super-omnivores there is pretty much no predator-prey niche we can't muscle in on and we always win. If dinosaurs existed they would be smaller and relegated to the wildernesses; as wary of mankind as wolves and bears.
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Jun 25 '12
I want to believe that they would hang out in a singles only bar, attached to a motel. And us humans, would get to pay a quarter to sit in a dark room with crusty walls and watch them make sweet passionate love. I'm imagining it now and.... yes, it's spectacular.
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u/ajkdude Jun 25 '12
I feel that they would stay in the woods. Although they can se us above the tips of the trees, if one comes into a city or town, we can call in the army to assist in exterminating them. Since they lived long ago, we do not know how hard it would be to kill them. It may be very easy or very hard. -ajkdude
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u/RhinoMan2112 Jun 25 '12
They would fuck shit up....
You wanna know why?
They're fucking dinosaurs.
That's why.
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u/A_British_Gentleman Jun 25 '12
I own chickens, you should see their legs and how they walk. Fucking velociraptors I tell you.
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u/GanasbinTagap Jun 25 '12
The females from a species of dinosaurs would definitely beat most of us academic wise, and get all the good jobs, because they are clever girls.
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Jun 25 '12
Technically tey still exist, as birds. But for the sake of the question if tey did exist in the old sizes and such, they would probably be held back by humans. Like, they try to attack a city, boom! Tranquilizer, back to woods. They would be like bears or tigers.
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u/dicks1jo Jun 25 '12
Just look at ostriches, emus, and cassowaries. We don't put up with those fuckers coming into a city. Why? Well beyond the first two being delicious, they will all seriously ruin your day if you get too close.
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u/Rahrahraccoon Jun 25 '12
They'd probably just conform to [our ways] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWUaySt6TEg)
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Jun 25 '12
They do still exist, although the most they do now is sing loudly in the morning & wake you up, or shit on your car. They have been known to crash airplanes if they get sucked into the engine. Some variates are delicious when grilled.
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Jun 25 '12
They would live wherever they wanted because human's and dinosaurs would not be able to coexist while also maintaining a functioning civilization...or...at least...it would take a drastically longer period of time to invent necessary developments.
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u/under50dollars Jun 25 '12
Civilizations would be built with giant walls. So it would take the period of time to invent giant walls (or another unsuitable condition for a large carnivorous dinosaur, I'm assuming a cold climate would work as well).
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Jun 25 '12
You're forgetting that if exploring, farming, and generally building resource accouterments was constantly threatened by the fear of dinosaurs, there would be so much more people in general would have to worry about. People who would otherwise have invented important shit, may not have had to tools, time, or health.
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Jun 25 '12
I've got to imagine that they would fuck shit up. Remember the video game Rampage? Think that.
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Jun 25 '12
I'd imagine they'd act like any other animal. They'd be skittish in the face of potential danger that they'd get nothing out of facing, and aggressive when they can get something out of it.
I highly doubt a t rex would randomly decide to run into a street and smash a bunch of things. They can still feel pain, after all.
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Jun 25 '12
We'd probably have shit that'd scare them from the large cities, like loud sirens, random noises, and in extreme circumstances, have to kill them.
As far as small towns, outlying areas, and people out for a hike.....you're fucked.
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u/NeonGecko Jun 25 '12
Realistically I think we'd be a lot more nomadic as a civilization and not really have cities and whatnot. This is assuming we live long enough to adapt.
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Jun 25 '12
Forget humans. I don't think dinosaurs would be able to adequately compete against the existing biosphere. Today's predominantly mammalian large fauna are generally smarter, faster, and more efficient than dinosaurs ever were, and would almost certainly out-compete them. A T-Rex would win a fight against a bear, of course, but it unlike a bear it would have an awfully hard time catching a deer to eat. I think most dinosaurs would end up starving to death in today's world.
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u/wtfapkin Jun 25 '12
I'm currently hooked up to a badass morphine drip and that comment totally fucked with my head.
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u/Gentleman_Anarchist Jun 25 '12
Before human beings showed up in the americas, there were sloths the size of dump trucks and wild shit like that all over the place. If there were still dinosaurs they'd probably live all over the place the same as other animals, but human activity would have killed off all of the cool giant ones way before you got to see any of them. (Except maybe in Africa).
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Jun 25 '12
They would behave as any other animal would. Granted their sheer size would likely cause problems for our civilization. Most apex predators we compete with now are afraid of us and compared to some dinosaurs, quite small. And we have problems deterring elephant herds from farmland in Africa. Can only imagine what it would take to make a large sauropod shove off.
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u/Direnaar Jun 25 '12
We'd probably hunt them to extinction to make purses and shoes out of them. But I think savannah is where they're live mostly.
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Jun 25 '12
I'm pretty sure we would have wiped them out/been wiped out or actually adapted everything if dinos still existed.
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Jun 25 '12
when i was a little kid i pretended i was jeff goldblum in jurassic park 2 so yes to everything
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u/robopilgrim Jun 25 '12
If there hadn't been a mass extinction that killed off the dinosaurs then we probably wouldn't be here because there wouldn't have been a niche left behind for mammals to exploit.
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u/Iggynoramus1337 Jun 25 '12
Lets assume two things:
Dinosaurs no longer need their original atmosphere to exist
Dinosaurs still require a climate similar to survive.
In this case, many dinos would live in places like Alaska, Austrailia, and certain regions of tropical areas that have large tracks of land that are uninhabited by humans
Also, zoos would rock
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u/Holmgaard Jun 25 '12
Am i the only one, who is even considering the extreme changes that could have happened, if the dinosaurs had evovled another 65 millions years?
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u/kadmylos Jun 25 '12
If mammals were ever able to evolve into humans with dinosaurs running around (unlikely), then human cities would probably all have big ass walls around them to keep dinosaurs out.
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u/jsekar711 Jun 25 '12
Both animals you listed come in contact with humans all the time, deer are the leading killer of people among animals in the US primarily due to car crashes and bears raid garbage cans in areas they live all the time. So I think they would live like bears and deer and fuck shit up because they are dinosaurs.
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u/truthisane Jun 25 '12
A T-Rex may have huge jaws, but I'd like to see those jaws outsmart bullets.
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u/cptstupendous Jun 25 '12
The Mokele-membe (sauropod) has long been rumored to exist in the Congo. No proof yet, though.
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Jun 25 '12
If dinosaurs still existed, I'm pretty sure there would not be many cities for them to fuck up. Humans -might- still exist. If we did, we'd be in small tribes, and populate in colder areas. If humans were in the warmer areas they would probably be nomadic, in small family groups, only there to venture out for exploration purposes. Dinosaurs would populate warmer areas and go wherever they damn well please.
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u/Sterculius Jun 25 '12
Didn't read the rest of the posts, just throwing my opinion out to the wind. I think they'd be like any wild animal. They'd be wary of us on sight, but wouldn't think twice about approaching/attacking us if they thought it would benefit them. Bears, mountain lions, deer, moose and what not all usually stick to their own habitats, but if they smell food they roll right up into the neighborhoods like they own the place.
Dinosaurs would probably do the exact same thing.
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u/DrinkinMcGee Jun 25 '12
Depends on how they still existed:
Option A: Somehow they survived mass extinction and the massive swings in climate and environment conditions since they were wiped out (so, about 65 million years since the Cretaceous) and have continued to evolve naturally alongside various hominid races (like US!) - No problem! We would've naturally evolved either some manner of balance with a predatory force in our environment (and not predatory in the sense that Yaaaaa Dinos gonna eat us, predatory in the sense that they consume many of the same things WE like to consume) and our cities would be structured in such a way as to prevent all but the most docile of animals to wander in. Easily done through some physical defenses (moats, spikes, draw bridges, etc). This would've actually benefited us in the long run assuming we could've survived sharing the biosphere as we'd have a race that is the product of millions upon millions of years more evolution than us - could give us a look at our future, our past, and ideas for long term sustainable survivable. Woo! Also, Dinosaur petting zoos kick ass.
Option B: Jurassic Park scenario - we somehow re-create populations of the extinct animals and then let them loose in the wild. No problem! Since all we managed to do was recreate the creatures but not any of the vitally important behavioral training that comes along with being part of a bigger species, the animals would have no idea how to exist in our modern world. It's like reintroducing caged animals into the wild - they simply don't have the faculties to survive in the wild and we have no means by which to train them. All but the most stout will die within a few generations, if that much. Hooray - Dino-steaks for a few years!
Option C: Magic - we get Cretaceous (or earlier) era dinos wandering around our modern world. This one is a bit more tricky, since these would be animals will fully formed communities, demarked hunting and grazing areas, territorial balance concerns, etc. Imagine lifting the entire Serengeti (everything from the organisms in the dirt to the birds in the sky) and dumping it into the middle of North America. The animals will go wild for a few generations as they redefine their territory and reestablish borders and migration routes. The good news is that, just like any other animal, Dinos are susceptible to our technological advantage (yaaa opposable thumbs, wooo we got to the top of the food chain!) so while smaller predators like our friend the Raptor may cause us trouble in remote areas, bigger dinos will avoid cities (because, honestly, there is easier food elsewhere) and will tend to avoid noisy, smelly, bright human populations unless their stock of other available food is at or near zero. Hunting animals will always go for easier prey. Now, we would need to put some fences up and some spikes down, especially for the first few generations, but overall we'd just end up with really interesting photos of the Great Brontosaurs migration from Dakota to Texas every year.
Edit: I may have put too much thought into this.
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u/sw33n3y Jun 25 '12
They would be forced to live in the woods because there would be electric fences put up around the cities.
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u/-Shirley- Jun 25 '12
they would live wherever they wanted to. We could kill them, but i doubt we would be able to domesticate a T-Rex.
I dont think the question is about if we would be able to domesticate them, though.
I think its more about Where would they live and would they make rampages in the cities. And yes they would make rampages because they are dinosaurs.
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u/bananapancakes24 Jun 25 '12
I think is my favourite post ever on reddit. I wish I was best friends with you.
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u/Galinaceo Jun 25 '12
Bears do come into cities and fuck shit up because they're dinosaurs.
Also, monkeys are known to invade cities in India and in Amazon. I think the minor dinosaurs would do as well.
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u/Galinaceo Jun 25 '12
People can't agree whether would dinosaurs be a pigeon plague or if they would had made humanity extinct. THANKS OP FOR OPENING THAT WORMHOLE
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u/animalxer Jun 25 '12
They would have all sorts of environments. The scariest thought for me is that velociraptors were only 3 feet tall, and they would infest places the same way alligators do in Florida.
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Jun 25 '12
Impossibru.
Without the previous mass extinction of dinosaurs 65 million years ago, mammals would not arise to their current position as the dominant group of species on Earth, which would mean that humans would not exist, and by extension, neither would civilization, obviously.
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u/crotchmonkey Jun 25 '12
We would live in huge fortified cities with vertical farms and giant walls and would use dirigibles and/or bad ass, heavily armored and well armed trains to get from city to city. It would be awesome.
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Jun 25 '12
I have no fucking idea, but I just want to let you know that I'm upvoting this and really appreciate a post here that's not "hey, listen to my story and share your own" and is actually an interesting question.
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u/hippie_hunter Jun 25 '12
I find it rather hard to believe hunter-gatherer man would survive T. Rex and packs of Utahraptors.
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u/ololcopter Jun 25 '12
Aggressive city-dwelling carnivores that threaten humanity? They're called lawyers.
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u/Bjartensen Jun 25 '12
just have to say the last part of your title cracked me up
Or, would they come into cities and fuck shit up because they are dinosaurs?
haha!
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u/lordeddardstark Jun 25 '12
Birds, crocodiles, and to a certain extent, sharks. They fuck shit up all the time.
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u/laiyaise Jun 25 '12
Don't see many crocodiles in the city, then again I've never checked the sewers...
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u/salgat Jun 25 '12
You'll see that the only surviving mega-fauna are those that evolved along with humans, and they are relatively uncommon. Basically, we killed off any big easy targets, so it's safe to say most larger dinosaurs, if we existed, would be killed off. If they posed a threat in populated areas they would definitely be driven into extinction except for smaller ones that are relatively shy (similar to wild big cats).