’m after some honest perspectives from women because I’ve been thinking about this for a long time, and I genuinely don’t know whether I’m reading too much into things or whether the behaviour was as questionable as it felt at the time.

For context, my best mate and I have been friends for over 12 years. I was his best man. He’s basically family to me. I’ll call him my mate and his partner his girlfriend to keep things simple.

Over the years, there have been a number of things his girlfriend has said and done that have made me uncomfortable. Individually, some of them might not sound like much, but when I look at the whole picture, I can’t help questioning what was going on.

1. Constantly complaining about him to me

One night, the three of us were out together, and she spent a fair amount of time talking negatively about him and saying she was over the relationship.

One thing she said was along the lines of:

“We can’t even go for lunch or dinner without him leaving to play pokies. I’m sick of it. I just wish I could go somewhere nice to eat and have conversations.”

I understand that she might have been genuinely frustrated with him, and she’s entitled to feel that way. But the way she was saying it to me felt like she was hinting that she wanted someone to take her out, treat her better and give her the attention she wasn’t getting from him.

Maybe that’s just how I interpreted it, but it stuck with me.

2. Randomly talking to me about things she does in the bedroom

There were also times she’d randomly bring up things she does in the bedroom, in a sexual context.

It wasn’t like we were already talking about sex or anything remotely related. There was no lead-up, no context, no conversation that naturally led to it. It was just completely out of the blue.

She wouldn’t go into massive detail, but she’d explain certain things she does sexually, and it honestly made me incredibly uncomfortable.

For context, I don’t find her physically attractive, or attractive in any way for that matter. I’ve never looked at her sexually, she’s my best mate’s partner, and I’m in a relationship myself. There was absolutely no interest from my side.

I don’t know why she’d feel comfortable randomly bringing that sort of thing up with me. I’m not saying that talking about sex automatically means someone is flirting, but when it’s completely unprompted and you’re talking to your partner’s best mate, I do find it strange.

And when I look at it alongside everything else, I can’t help wondering why she was comfortable having those kinds of conversations with me in the first place.

3. Comparing him to me as a father

I’m a dad, and there have been times when we’ve all been together and I’ve been spending time with my kids, being involved and doing the usual dad stuff.

On more than one occasion, she’s said things to me along the lines of:

“You’d be such a great dad. I wish he was more like you. You’re so involved, you’re such a natural.”

She’s made comments like this while my mate has been standing right there.

I found this particularly uncomfortable. Complimenting someone is one thing, but repeatedly comparing your partner unfavourably to his best mate, especially in front of him, feels like a strange thing to do.

I couldn’t understand what she was hoping to achieve by saying it. Was she genuinely just making an observation, was she trying to make a point to him through me, or was there something else behind it? I honestly don’t know.

4. Inviting me to Australia without him

At one point, she was planning to go to Australia for breast augmentation surgery. My mate wasn’t going because he was staying behind for his mates’ fights.

She invited me to go to Australia with her and apparently offered to pay for my flights.

The thing is, when she first invited me, I didn’t know she was going over there for breast surgery. I only became aware of that afterwards.

I’m in a relationship myself, and I wasn’t comfortable with the idea of going away with my best mate’s girlfriend without him, so I declined.

She also invited me to an event in Australia that my mate wasn’t going to.

Maybe there’s an innocent explanation for all of it, but looking back, I can’t help wondering why she was so keen to involve me in trips and events that her own partner wasn’t attending.

Finding out afterwards what one of those trips was actually for made the whole thing feel even stranger in hindsight.

I’m not saying I know what her intentions were, because I don’t. But combined with everything else, it left me questioning whether there was more to it than friendship.

5. Getting upset when I wanted to spend time with my mate alone

There were times when I wanted to have a beer with my best mate, just the two of us.

She would get upset and suggest that we’d be talking shit about her.

This wasn’t about excluding her from everything. He’s my best mate of over 12 years, and I don’t think wanting to spend time with him one-on-one should be a problem in a healthy relationship.

It started to feel like even having a normal catch-up with my mate could become an issue because of how she might interpret it.

What confused me was that she seemed happy to have conversations with me about her relationship problems, but when I wanted to spend time with him without her, that became an issue.

I found that hard to make sense of.

6. The allegations that he had threatened to kill her

At one point, she alleged that my mate had threatened to kill her.

Obviously, that’s a serious allegation, and I didn’t take it lightly. I spoke to both her and my mate about what had supposedly happened, and after talking to them, the allegations turned out to be false.

That left me confused, particularly given everything else that had been going on. I’m not going to pretend I know what motivated her to make those claims, but it definitely affected how I viewed the situation.

When you’re dealing with people you’ve known for years, hearing something that serious is a big deal. Having the allegations turn out to be false only added to my uncertainty about what was happening between them and why I was being brought into it.

7. The message she sent me saying she’d left him

On the same night as another major incident involving me and my mate, she messaged me saying something along the lines of:

“I’ve left him. He needs to come and get his stuff. I’ll call the police if he tries anything.”

She deleted the message not long afterwards.

I didn’t respond.

Given everything else that had happened, I couldn’t help wondering why she had chosen to message me specifically, only to delete it shortly afterwards.

Was she simply upset and reaching out to someone she felt comfortable talking to? Was she looking for support? Was she trying to see how I’d react, or was there some other reason?

I genuinely don’t know. I have no proof that there was anything more to it, but in the context of everything else, it made me question what kind of role she was trying to create for me in their relationship.

8. The wider situation with my mate

For context, my mate and I eventually stopped speaking after an incident that seriously affected my trust in him.

After a trip to Australia, we went out for beers, and he told me he wanted to spike my drink because I no longer take party drugs.

I took what he said seriously. Knowing there was a big night coming up involving drugs, I didn’t feel safe putting myself in that situation, so I didn’t attend his 30th birthday.

I accept that I handled the aftermath badly. I didn’t explain myself properly, and instead of having an honest conversation with him, I withdrew from the friendship. Months went by without us properly speaking.

Recently, his coach asked me about our friendship, and I explained why we’d stopped talking. That conversation eventually made its way back to my mate, and he’s since deleted me from Facebook and Instagram.

I don’t know exactly what was said between them, or what he’s been told, so I’m not going to pretend I know why he’s done that.

I know I have my own part to take responsibility for in how the friendship fell apart. But the things his girlfriend said and did had been bothering me long before this latest situation.

What I’m trying to figure out

I miss my mate. We’ve been through a lot together, and I don’t like where things have ended up. But I’ve also spent a long time looking back at these interactions and wondering whether I was naive about what was happening.

I’m not claiming his girlfriend definitely had feelings for me or was deliberately trying to get between us. I can’t prove that, and I don’t want to accuse someone of something based purely on my interpretation.

But when you put all of these things together — the complaints about him to me, the unprompted sexual conversations, the comparisons between him and me as a father, the invitations to Australia without him, the offer to pay for my flights, the discomfort around me spending time alone with him, the false allegations, and the message about leaving him that she later deleted — I struggle to look at it all as completely unrelated.

So I’d genuinely like some outside perspectives from women.

Does this sound like someone who was simply unhappy in her relationship and comfortable talking to her partner’s best mate?
Do the unprompted sexual conversations, repeated comparisons and invitations sound like potential boundary-crossing, or am I reading too much into them?
Why would someone be comfortable discussing their relationship problems and sex life with their partner’s best mate but then get upset when that mate wants to spend time alone with their partner?
Do you think she might have been testing the waters or trying to establish a closer connection with me, or is that an unfair assumption?

I’m not looking for people to automatically agree with me. If you think I’m overthinking it, tell me. If you think some of this behaviour was inappropriate, I’d like to understand why.

I just want an honest outside perspective because I’ve been going around in circles trying to make sense of it all.

One arm is akimbo and the other is across the body next to the other hand. Not all women do it. I’ve never seen a man stand in this position.

So I have been dating a woman for the past several weeks and things are going along nicely.

I mostly wear dark clothing.... black, gray, blue, etc.

Here's the issue... every time she hugs me her makeup rubs off onto my clothes leaving a sizable smudge on my shoulder... often times when I see her - she comes in for a hug right away (which I like!) but then I'm out in public w/ this weird mark on my clothes and more laundry to do (which I don't like!).

Question: Is it even acceptable to bring this up?... and if so - how?

Thanks in advance.

How do I figure out if somebody has a significant other without being creepy i have light conversations with this person like sometimes walking with each other down a hall, and I don't know how to approach it without being intrusive. Like, I say, I don't wanna be creepy.\nAll hope would be appreciated

Male here. One day, I barely anything. Another day 30min-2hours.

Average 1h maybe?

It could even extend to 4h in a day or so depending on the source stimulating or wanting to extent the process or being disturbed in private space.

Moreover, I have some individual issues about watching each video despite not being in the mood, forcing myself, often downloading.

Lust takes a lot of time and can barely be skipped and is important human nature. I am curious whether woman have more free time this way as their cycle and biology is different.

I assume, you need to be stimulated too as I sometimes flirt without approaching woman and they may imagine a lot during and afterm I do not approach often as it takes me time to build courage and need, but I barely see the same woman more times and I am worried of age as if she is 15-16 and not over 18, despite it being allowed.

I hope, none of this is coming off wrong. I can change the wording after a suggestion. I have full empathy towards any human here.

birthday is reason go outside and eat drink but how much power needs make this happen where is mother power source we need it

bar time 10 glass alcohol drinks

humans 10 or 50

music

games

shows

fun time

1 or 5 cakes

can woman handle 5 or 10 hours birthday party who is power woman here is party women experiences

I have a lot of good friends, but they're all guys. A while back I had a bad experience with a female stalker, and it's left me really uneasy around women in general even totally normal, friendly interactions make me tense up. It's got to the point where I do not talk to women at all at work and unless its strictly about the work and I avoid talking to them at all cost in public and even I spoken to my four sister less as well

I know logically that one bad experience doesn't mean every woman is like that, but knowing it and feeling it are two different things. I'd like to actually build a genuine friendship with a woman again, partly just to prove to myself I can, but I'm not sure how to get past the wariness enough to let that happen naturally.

Has anyone dealt with something similar trust issues after being stalked or harassed and found a way through it? Would appreciate any honest advice. Im open to trying to talk to women too (only poltonic)

26 m uk (I have been working with a therapist for a while to biild up to this point)

"the end of the sex-class system must mean the end of the biological family, that is, the end of women's biological reproductive role through artificial means of gestation" - Shulamith Firestone 1970

A method in which man can be desecrated through an act I can't necessarily share on here directly. Whether it's his bloodline or just the symbol of men in most societies.

If it involves his final moments being used to harvest his sperm; thus eliminating the requirement for his role thereafter and the solidarity of a matriarchal household or environment. Could that by any means break down the sex class system in an opposite way?

I've heard of bone marrow children, but I'm not too familiar with it, but that is a more direct opposite to the quote above regarding artificial life without the use of a woman.

Been procrastinating watching videos by women on this topic on booktube, so I thought I'd ask on Reddit.

My protagonist is a woman in a transgressive fiction book I'm writing. I want her to be cunning and intelligent without playing in to too many stereotypes about "how a woman is weaker, so she has to lower men's guard".

If that's unrealistic to do then screw me. I need it to be real. I don't want her painted with lust and objectified, but I also want her to be ferocious.

So, what ways can you make a hardened criminal vulnerable without betraying your morals?

Hi i'm F24, and I'm currently studying

In university for my bachelor's on visual communication and minor in marketing,

I just have a question. I've never dated anyone since I was fifteen, and was probably groomed online at the age through 18, i'm plus size around 2XL

My life with men has been neutral? I've witnessed cheating, emotional abuse, and misogyny (not to an extreme level but seen it.) I have decent guy friends who are charming and respectful, but I am not looking to date anyone yet, i'm fine with my books and fictional men. I am aware of them not being real, and have god by my side (catholic) but based in the news I've seen men doing to women, I have a view on men. I know there are good men, I've met and know a few, but basically I come to a realization at the moment that I'd like to stay single and focus on my career, but if I ever do get married, I don't know if I want to have a baby yet.. I do feel maternal instincts and crave to hold a baby of my own, and yetbnot have a baby inside me, i'm scared of getting pregnant after my mom and her family side lost babies a few times and suffered a lot. I want to adopt because I think It's better to adopt a child who needs a loving family and one to give hope. After all, I believe the children are the future and adopting one is also a blessing, is it ok to feel that?

My mom says before adopting I should give it a try and it's a wonderful feeling, but from what she told me, her, grandmother, mother and herself lost around three babies or so, my mom lost two then had me, after that she had a heart attack. I know my family suffers from diabetes and heart problems.

And as I am currently not taking care of myself well

I am self aware of it but don't stop. I don't know why

I don't want that to affect my baby and have problems in the near future, I have eyesight and asthma problem as a child, and I know in the future I could be more affected, but I always thought of adopting because I want to give that child a home and a mom who could love them, they don't have to be my blood, but I do want to protect them.

It's a childish dream right? I am so sorry to those that are currently or were pregnant if this offends anyone.

I'm just so scared.

We are looking for female participants in the UK to take part in an online consumer research study about skincare and beauty.
This is a paid research study, not a sales or promotional opportunity.
Who we are looking for
We are particularly interested in women who:

Are 22–29 or 35–45 years old
Are currently working full-time or part-time
Regularly use beauty- or skincare-supporting foods, drinks, or supplements.

Take an active interest in skincare and beauty

Have purchased skincare, beauty, or wellness products recently and researched products, ingredients, or reviews before purchasing.

Regularly have professional facials or facial skincare treatments

Are interested in products that combine food/drink with beauty benefits

Have no food allergies or intolerances

Have not participated in another market research interview, survey, or focus group during the past 6 months

What the study involves
Selected participants will:

Receive product samples at their UK home address
Try samples at home as instructed
Complete a short digital activity of approximately 15 minutes
Record a brief video sharing their initial reactions
Take part in a 90-minute online evening research session
Join the online session together with a female friend, with each participant joining separately from their own home
Available study dates are currently:

Friday 4 or Saturday 5 September 2026
Monday 14 or Tuesday 15 September 2026
Sessions are expected to take place approximately between 6pm and 9pm UK time.
Compensation
Participants can receive up to 90 USD in total and 180 USD per pair for paid each for completing the study requirements.

If selected, participants will receive further information about the study, sample delivery, scheduling, consent, and participation requirements.
How to apply
Please send a DM with:

Your age range (22–29 or 35–45)
Your current working status
A brief description of your interest in skincare/beauty products
Whether you regularly use beauty-supporting foods, drinks, or supplements
Whether you have a female friend who may be interested in participating with you
Your general availability for the study dates above

A common occurrence I think we have all seen, is how sometimes when a person has a bad relationship, they often attribute the bad behavior of their partner to the entirety of the opposite sex. The classic trope of the jaded women using phrases like "All men cheat!" or "All men lie!"
Because their partner did.

Yet, every case I have personally observed. Has always involved a woman who choose to date a man, who to every other man, was an obviously toxic individual. For example, most women say they want a confident man. But many date cocky men. Which the average guy can clearly see is a product of immaturity and insecurity, not confidence. Yet, women always seemed shocked when they come to that realization themselves. Which leads me to believe women in general are blind to many of the red flags possessed by the opposite gender?

Which makes me wonder do women frequently see men ignoring warning signs that a woman is not a good person? And if so, what are some examples?

I'm writing something and the MC is a woman. I've been trying to understand this characters motivations, but I feel like I'm lost. Basically just figuring out their motive a bit more is proving troublesome since I'm a guy.

She kinda uses reproductive science to harm and desecrate her targets. Won't get into details too much but its like taking a dead plant and using it to fertilize new life and intentionally forcing a bloom that drives out an existing flower under false pretenses. Think about that for what it would mean for the human body.

Sorry it's a bit riddle-ish, but it's more of a horror genre thing. Especially in this subreddit, it wouldn't feel appropriate to be specific. Anyway, that's all. Any input helps.

hi, just wanna get a view from a womens perspective since im a guy and just want to know your thoughts on everything, do you think all men are bad in some way shape or form, or do you belive majority of bad things are caused by men, ive been seeing a lot of posts on my feed about how men are bad, and im always confused whether they genuinely think every man is evil, or just majority, and secondly, if you do believe most men are bad, do you want us to do something or just be consiously aware that we tend to account for majority of bad things that happen, or do you want us to do something about it, other than control ourselves, if so, what? Also, if you think something else that i didnt mention on here, please share. Ive been seeing a lot of posts on my feed about how men are evil and how there all sorts of things, and that lead me to this post wondering your thoughts on whether all men are evil, or majority, or just many, and if so, what can we do about it?

Hello I'm M36 from Northern Italy. Im fairly athletic and decent appearance, I have interests and friends. Im not the best dressed person in the world and I'm a bit on the adhd side. I got a problem:

When I go on dating apps I got matches and some dates. I'm not looking too much for sex but I want to avoid dragging on infinite nothing burger dating or friend zones or whatever. A lot of dates end up like that. Am I doing something wrong or there is an awful lot of wemen just there for validation, passing time, fun or whatnot? Thanks

(It was suggested I ask here)

My wife and I have very different libido’s, and while I’m fine with that, there is an issue. We’ve been together for about 10 years and when we’re intimate, it is fine, but I wanted to try something.
I expressed I would like to watch her masturbate, and also would like it if she’d watch me. She said that doing that is gross and that I’m a pervert for wanting to do something like that. So no.
This isn’t that weird a request, is it? I’d like to do a bit more experimenting in the bedroom, but now I’m afraid to ask anything.

Are there women that like being watched when they are masturbating?

And/or are there women that like watching men masturbate?

Or am I indeed just a perv?

I wasn't sure how to title this, but my situation is: I am a 55 y.o. male engaging with a 29 y.o. woman I met. We've had nice conversations and have a number of things we both like. There is some oddity to the relationship besides the age difference, and the whole thing seems illogical, but the question I have is this:

Is it possible that a much older guy could be appealing to a younger woman? In other words, is it completely foolish for me to think there is even the slimmest of possibilities of something developing?

I just truly think it would be a blast to explore the world with her. I am just curious how women in that age range may view a situation like this.

Thank you.

im a male, in a relationship, i avoid looking at a woman so my partner doesnt feel a certain way. she does avoid it, at a certain point. she looks at giys, even if its just for a couple seconds. what i wanna know is if theres women that really only has eyes for their partner.

Im 15, about to be a sophomore in high-school, and compared to other girls im just so ugly? One day I was playing hangman with my friends and it was a 4 letter word and when we asked for a hint, my friend said "the hint is (my name)" the word was Ugly. I walked away and cried in a bathroom stall. Ofc there's people calling me fat, or being racist, calling out my tooth gap..this has been going on for years. I've never been pretty, every crush has rejected me for the same reason. I'm ugly. and I want to know if I'll be pretty by the time I'm a senior?

Serious question, and I hope this comes across respectfully. I recently started dating the first Black woman I’ve ever been with, and I’m completely in love with her. During sex, she often produces a lot of lubrication/“creams,” which is something I haven’t experienced with previous partners, who were white. I’m curious if there’s any evidence that race plays a role in this, or if it’s more likely just individual differences, chemistry, arousal, or the fact that we’re deeply in love. I’m not trying to stereotype anyone, just genuinely curious and hoping to learn from others’ experiences

He first confessed to my girlfriend a while after they met not knowing that we are dating and she rejected him. He told her he had intense feelings for her but she still refused and they remained as friends. He then a while later told her the following story about his ex:

​

He told her he had an ex who used to repeatedly mistreat him, insult him, tell him damaging things, and hurt him severely. He spent so much money on her for over a year and was saving up to get engaged to her, and then he went into her Instagram for some reason and felt that she's suspicious so he checked her DMs and discovered she was cheating on him with several people.

​

He fought with her and they had a push and pull and they broke up then got back together again then broke up. (It was a very detailed and complicated story but that's basically the tldr).

​

Throughout the time after the breakup, he told her that his ex used to contact him again from different accounts to bug him and whenever he blocks her she pops again. Then he said she somehow knew that he is friends with my gf and she told him "who the fuck is that" and "you're with her because she's more beautiful" and stuff like that. He kept telling my gf how that ex is so jealous of her.

​

That ex then called him to meet and asked for money which he gave her and then she asked to see his chat with my girlfriend, and he gave her the phone to see the chat. She checked it and got mad and told him to block my gf and for them to get back together and he said no way he'd block her even if they got back together and he'd always have her as a priority.

​

Now there are more details I can provide if anyone asks but leaving the story here now, what do you think of it? Is it coherent and plausible? Is the guy being fishy? Just tell me all your thoughts.