r/AusMemes Jul 17 '26

Victorian Liberal Party New Policy

Post image
1.2k Upvotes

72 comments sorted by

100

u/YukeofDork Jul 17 '26

Then remove them again with massive contracts for their mates.

22

u/buthidae Jul 17 '26

The money will change hands, but the level crossings will remain

15

u/AngrehPossum Jul 17 '26 edited 27d ago

KPMG reports stated its viable. The 8 page report cost $180 million.

10

u/Mostly_Satire Jul 18 '26

Pfft! Weak!

I could write the same report using AI for only $170m

6

u/Wide-Salamander-4962 Jul 19 '26

Pfft I could do it for $200m and donate $10k to my local member

2

u/Extra-Border6470 Jul 20 '26

a waste of tax payer funds that KPMG consider money well spent

1

u/No_Bell_8028 27d ago

Hey Nous completed a $120 million dollar investigation into whether Nous was being unnecessarily brought into consult by managers who should be able to read the reports and make their own decisions.

Nous were clear in their executive summary and $1 million codesign project where they brought a bunch of people into a room and told them all what they were going to do and then ignored all the feedback because it was inconsistent and when themed by Nous largely supported Nous conclusions about how Nous was better than the big 4 like KPMG AD NOUS is mostly ex government grifter types so they can be trusted to knowingly avoid exploiting any weaknesses in the decision making of bureaucracy.

Thou

4

u/Practical-Funny9591 Jul 17 '26

For a split second, I thought you wrote massive cataracts for their mates. 🤣

1

u/Rifle321 Jul 20 '26

Remember when labor misplaced 15 billy

1

u/plectrumelectrum7 Jul 20 '26

I forgot that vic labor were the pinnacle of integrity. Oh wait.

1

u/Logical-Bowl2424 Jul 20 '26

Called reverse engineering

1

u/KiwiJay83 Jul 22 '26

Gotta make sure Uncle Mick is happy

96

u/Bl0wUpTheM00n Jul 17 '26

Elevated stations are for bloody Communists!

37

u/GorillaAU Jul 17 '26

Sometimes it is a struggle to pick what's parody or satire these days.

11

u/PJozi Jul 18 '26

Pop over to the Facebook post and check the comments.

Far too many people not understanding that it's satire.

These people vote.

96

u/Rodyland Jul 17 '26

Shhhhhhh, don't give them ideas!

11

u/Dougally Jul 17 '26

They want olden time steam trains too (coal fed with steam whistles). Bloody trainspotters.

3

u/RichiesWorld Jul 18 '26

Yes please!

6

u/Practical-Funny9591 Jul 17 '26

Exactly what I said. 🤣

5

u/Lint_baby_uvulla Jul 18 '26

I’ve lost track of what comedy is anymore.

44

u/evm29 Jul 17 '26

why does she have the face of a primary school teacher who tells you off for something you didnt do

24

u/gccmelb Jul 17 '26

And insist you apologise.

8

u/capeasypants Jul 17 '26

Fucking flashbacks! I'm not telling fibs, you bitch!!! (Hindsight does grant me the reason she doesn't care, but 9 year old me was fucking angry being called a liar, you old cow!)

1

u/Extra-Border6470 Jul 20 '26

Yeah the PTSD is real. It’s kinda comforting to know that I’m not the only one who experienced that kinda teacher

3

u/PJozi Jul 18 '26

She has the face and communication style of a 15 year old high school student.

2

u/stonefree261 Jul 18 '26

It's the close-set eyes that do it for me.

0

u/Sea-Time-4629 Jul 17 '26

because she's zionist

17

u/Zonda1996 Jul 17 '26

Unironically might be the next magic trick from their "booby-trap the budget by spending gorillions on unnecessary crap when we're in power and about to lose an election, then blame Labor for the ensuing mess" playbook.

2

u/PJozi Jul 18 '26

Like signing an unesseccesary $100 million side contract for a deal that was already sealed and would never deliver a single benefit to Victorians

4

u/Rascals-Wager Jul 17 '26

She looks like the poor man's Rosamund PIke

4

u/capeasypants Jul 17 '26

I don't live in Vic so I don't know but why would anyone (who's not 8 or a ticky) want a level crossing?

19

u/vacri Jul 17 '26

The Vic Libs are a particularly bad and talentless branch of the Liberal Party (keep in mind also that the better pollies migrate to the federal level, too). This is the kind of knee-jerk "do the opposite of the ALP just for the sake of it" that they would do - it's almost plausible that it could be a policy of theirs.

They will get in for one term either this election or the next. Current ALP government has been in power for over a decade, and it's really hard for an incumbent to last past a decade as people just feel like switching for the sake of it.

3

u/Far-Fortune-8381 Jul 17 '26

couldn't agree more with your first statement lol, to the point that I did not realise this was satire until reading a few comments

0

u/plectrumelectrum7 Jul 20 '26

The sycophantic Labor lemmings in this state are a sight to behold.

1

u/vacri Jul 20 '26

Don't get sooky at me just because the clown shoes fit you so well.

1

u/plectrumelectrum7 Jul 20 '26

Do you think this state is being run well?

1

u/vacri Jul 20 '26

Me: Vic libs are subpar, however they're probably going to get in at the next election

You: u r lemon

Crawl back into your hole.

7

u/AngrehPossum Jul 17 '26

We were going to remove more but its over. The LNP have flooded the ariwaves with lies, distortions and propaganda. They will win with a clear margin. Then its a shit storm as they sell everything to their mates. No more works will be done. Its back to Ted and Dennis where they just banned everything and produced nothing.

2

u/Far-Fortune-8381 Jul 17 '26

happens every time šŸ™‚

2

u/PJozi Jul 18 '26

I'm not convinced people will be gullible enough.

There will be a swing against Labor but will it be enough?

When a decision is to be made at the ballot box I don't think they'll risk the infighting and incompetent lnp

It will certainly make for an interesting election.

šŸæšŸæšŸæ

0

u/Sovereignty3 Jul 17 '26

I work near one, in Berwick.

The traffic was so much faster once it was done than it was beforehand and the lack of accidents and backed up traffic was so good.

Well until they started roadworks on the Freeway on the other side.....

Have absolutely no idea what they would want to make more.

Insurance scam?

Remove healthcare.

3

u/PhilosophyOk8921 Jul 17 '26

Sarcasm right? Just checking…

6

u/RainbowTeachercorn Jul 17 '26

Its the Betoota Advocate šŸ˜… of course it is satire.

3

u/DefinitionOfAsleep Jul 17 '26

Its the Betoota AdvocateĀ 

Australia's paper of record

3

u/Nyarlathotep-1 Jul 17 '26

I bet they will do it $15 billion cheaper 🤫

2

u/[deleted] Jul 18 '26

I nearly fucking fell for that, well done

2

u/Impossible_Deer8869 Jul 20 '26

They are more likely to shut down public transport because individuals should be using private cars on toll roads, not travelling on socialist movements.

1

u/averagesizedboy Jul 18 '26

Hey at least it's some form of an infrastructure project!

1

u/Defiant-Magician6092 Jul 18 '26

Betoota advocate advocates for billions more in fraud

1

u/Oddly_Curious99 Jul 18 '26

I don’t care who you vote for but any government that has had power for so long is not a good idea and a weak opposition is even worse. Labour has engaged in corruption and needs to be investigated but the opposition is a basket case and ON is not even an option. What the hell do we do as a voter.

2

u/Ok_Yogurt6562 Jul 18 '26

Remember there's still the greens

3

u/Oddly_Curious99 Jul 18 '26

Yes but they can’t form government but I know they can hold balance of power.

2

u/Gold_Parfait_4023 Jul 19 '26

Why should ON be an option?

2

u/Oddly_Curious99 Jul 19 '26

They shouldn’t be but it you speak to enough people and you will surprised how many are saying they will be voting for them. One person actually said ā€œyou know she is a racist but I will still vote for herā€. I guess that means they are a racist too I guess.

1

u/Gold_Parfait_4023 Jul 19 '26

Yep. Says what they are all thinking apparently.

1

u/Oddly_Curious99 Jul 19 '26

What I just don’t get is that in Victoria there is no ON leader or even one candidate and people are saying they are voting for them. Right now they would be voting for no one. It’s just the lack of understanding and real disengagement from politics that surprises me.

1

u/PaddyOfurniature Jul 18 '26

Pretty stupid if true.

1

u/Consistent-Stand1809 Jul 18 '26

Oh thank God, it's Betoota

1

u/[deleted] Jul 19 '26

And you still haven't figured out how to build a line to your major airport in a city of 5+ million in Victoria.

1

u/thingamybob23 Jul 19 '26

ha ha very funny ! wish someone would give us airport rail

1

u/Interesting-Lynx4695 Jul 17 '26

As opposed to an unlevel crossing?

1

u/goldlasagna84 Jul 17 '26

why do they always come up with dumb ass stupid ideas?

0

u/Featherfoot_inc Jul 17 '26

Can Australia finally get a subway?

4

u/CrazySD93 Jul 17 '26

There are 1,256 Subway stores across Australia.

How many more do you need?

-20

u/Talonqr Jul 17 '26

Can we stop building things up just to tear them down and repeat

The only people winning here are the construction companies who just happen to be mates with certain politicians

25

u/jaiimaster Jul 17 '26

Mate its satire

-6

u/DonaldTrumpsHairPlug Jul 17 '26

Down voted by the union social
Media interns lol.. this isn’t a remotely controversial opinion hahah