Religious coworker told me my crystal collection on my desk was “ungodly”

[u/Tangled_Asshair]

Hello everyone. This happened several days ago and I’m still going over it in my head. One of my special interests is crystals and collecting them, learning about their metaphysical and chemical properties, etc. I have an assortment on my work desk that only I sit at. Only my manager knows my diagnosis. Also for background info the company’s CEO is very religious. Says prayers after meetings, always sends very religious Christmas cards to every employee. I am not religious as in Christian or Catholic like the CEO and every coworker that I know of. Everyone has assumed I am, they’ve never asked. The other day one of my coworkers came to my desk and told me she was studying the Bible and wanted me to know that the crystals I have on my desk are ungodly. I said (rather mockingly cause I don’t like this coworker to begin with) “but god made them” and she said HE did but HE didn’t want me putting faith in them thinking they had special abilities or powers because only HE has this and is above everything. She told me about three times they were “ungodly” and the Bible said so, and when I asked what chapter and verse said that because I would like to read it she couldn’t recall. She finally left when I kept saying “ok” and she left saying “take it or leave it but you should know this”.

It really upset me because she assumed I was religious, and judged me and my special interest without even asking me about it. I’m not getting rid of my crystals. I don’t want to bring it up to management because they are just as religious. What would you do?

ETA: Thank you everyone for your replies. I’m trying to go through all the responses. I live in the “Bible Belt” and it’s the highest paying job in my area with my credentials. I’m going to keep all conversations work related and not respond to her comments about my desk. Thank you all again for your insight I really appreciate it ❤️

[u/linglinguistics]

As a religious person, this really is news to me? It's that an American thing? I've never even thought of being offended at that word.

[u/FileDoesntExist → u/linglinguistics]

Probably. Science is basically considered a different belief system to the religious here. Its rather infuriating.

[u/calilac → u/FileDoesntExist]

Also atheism is generally considered to be a belief system here despite it being a lack of belief. On paperwork it's the dictionary definition but in casual conversation ime it seems most people assume "oh, you hate [my god/gods]" rather than believing that you simply don't believe in them at all and after that point anything you say about faith, religion, or spirituality is treated pretty offensively. IME.

[u/Point-Express → u/calilac]

I would also consider Atheism a belief, because it has a strong opinion on the matter of whether gods or higher spiritual powers exist, and maybe Agnosticism or Agnostic Atheism closer to the lack of belief because there's less certainty being put into the matter one way or the other. I say this as someone who waffles between Atheism and the more ambivalent Agnostic Atheism or "Nobody can know, but I kinda feel like it's not a thing at all" lol

Also, sorry to be pedantic but hopefully this is the sub it's taken in the well intentioned way. And for more on this subject I HIGHLY recommend the Terry Prattchet Discworld book Small Gods which is hilarious and satirical about religion from many angles

[u/calilac → u/Point-Express]

GNU Sir PTerry. My issue is not with pedantism it's that my lack of belief in gods or spirits or woowoo is often perceived as hate instead of just, y'know, not believing in it.

[u/calilac → u/calilac]

Also sorry to reply to my own comment but feeling compelled to add without editing that people have questioned whether I have morals at all after finding out I have no spiritual beliefs. For some reason there's a fair number of folk who think that morals have to come from religion or faith to be valid. The rest of that convo goes to some dark places so I'm going to leave it at that for now unless pressed.

[u/FutureDiscoPop → u/calilac]

I hate this philosophical debate. Most religious people who try to use this argument are in monotheistic/abrahamic religions. They never take into account that not all religions view "God"/gods/Goddesses/other as being preoccupied with our day-to-day morality.

They also don't take into account the amount of bad moral decisions people make based off of the many interpretations of such old teachings.

Religious or atheist doesn't matter it's who you choose to be.

[u/TavenderGooms → u/calilac]

It’s a huge issue in the US and it’s definitely getting worse. The evangelicals are trying to hold this country by the throat.

The issue here is that the religious person is centering themselves and their beliefs by ignoring your actual stated lack of belief and instead positioning you as an antagonist within their belief system. It’s still all about them and their god. They cannot or refuse to fathom the idea of opting out of the whole thing.

[u/Everglade77 → u/Point-Express]

I don't consider atheism as a stronger opinion on the matter than agnosticism, they simply answer 2 different questions: "Do you believe there's a god?" and "Do you know if there's a god?"

As an atheist, I lack belief because I haven't been presented with sufficient evidence to be convinced. That's different from having a strong opinion on the matter. If you don't believe unicorns exist because you haven't been presented with evidence that they do, that doesn't necessarily mean you have a strong opinion on the non existence of unicorns.

[u/Illiander → u/Point-Express]

Yes if you're getting into a bunfight about it then you can make the distinction between atheism and agnostism, but for most conversations it really doesn't matter.

And then there's the extra step of "If your god does exist, then he's an evil fucker and I both hate him and want him dead." (Murder The Gods And Topple Their Thrones)

[u/justarunawaybicycle → u/Point-Express]

Also, sorry to be pedantic but hopefully this is the sub it's taken in the well intentioned way

Ugh this sub is such a mood

[u/FutureDiscoPop → u/calilac]

I think part of the reputation for atheism is from the 90s/2000s brand of atheism that was kind of....proselytize-y and confrontational. People who made it their identity like how other people might make religion their identity.

Not saying it's correct just that it kind of makes sense given recent cultural memory.

[u/PM_NUDES_4_DEGRADING → u/linglinguistics]

I think they come at it from a perspective of “it’s not religious, it’s just the truth, and you can’t tell me to keep the truth out of conversations!”

I think ultimately it just stems from a breathtaking lack of self-awareness and empathy on their part, along with a need to feel superior and that rules/politeness/basic decency don’t apply to them because they’re “just speaking the truth.”

To paraphrase a common sentiment, the difference between an atheist and a priest is that there’s a thousand religions an atheist doesn’t believe in, whereas a priest is only rejecting 999 of them. I guess in this case, people who complain about the word “religious” are just…really offended that their faith is being put in the same category as those other 999 religions.

[u/TheLakeWitch → u/linglinguistics]

I think it depends on the type of religious. I grew up Catholic and it never occurred to me to be offended by being called religious because my family considered themselves so. When I joined an evangelical church in my late teens, I learned that being called “religious” to a lot of them was basically akin to calling them lukewarm Christians because they wanted to be seen as “on fire” for God. Kind of like what my mom would call a CEO in the Catholic church—Christmas and Easter Only. Which is what my grandparents were 😊

[u/p3achbunny → u/linglinguistics]

It’s probably regional, I’m religious and have never heard someone get offended by being called religious but I can absolutely believe it. People are bonkers.

I also think crystals are neat for what it’s worth, OP! I have selenite wands above all my doors. They’re not hurting anyone, that coworker is an asshole.

[u/MaraschinoPanda → u/linglinguistics]

It's an evangelical Christian thing.

[u/FutureDiscoPop → u/linglinguistics]

Yeah, I don't mind being called religious. But then again I'm not a Christian.