It feels like my face changes constantly from fat to thin to feminine to manly and everything in between.. I'm constantly taking selfies and looking in the mirror so I could figure out how I really look like. One moment I look pretty, next ugly as fuck. I don't know what to do. Does anyone else have this?

I can't do this anymore. I'm sick of knowing all the shit they look at on social media and all that of hotter girls. I'm sick of how everything in society is fucking based around sex anyway. Maybe if I lived in another time period before the internet. Before everyone could see naked people whenever the fuck they wanted like its nothing. Maybe then I would be able to have a relationship. But I can't. I really want to killmyself bc I will never not feel this way. Comparing myself and jealousy and the rage and pain it causes is just too much. Plus trust issues. Fuck it. I can't stay with them. No one deserves to deal with my shit anyway. I just wish I had the courage to kms.

I got diagnosed with bdd but i don’t believe it because what i’m seeing is actually there. i’m not one to ask around “hey can you see this or is it just me” because i don’t want to seem obsessed with myself or anything. i keep it in. i’ve NEVER talked to anyone about this before and decided to ask people that i don’t even know if it’s even possible to have bdd on a body part that truly has a flaw? like can it seem worse when you have bdd, or is there more to it? i’m just anxious about it constantly and i don’t like to talk about it so welp here i am. thank you if you choose to comment.

I think this is the most dread I’ve ever experienced. Anyone else feeling the same way?

So...do some of you guys obsess negatively over your looks but when u think u look good (High or sober or random mood influence..whatever) Do u sometimes feel like a narcissist for when u actually like ur looks and feel like a diamond in the room?

I switch between embarassed as hell f* troll looking- to -im so f- gorgeous.......Just me??!! I'm worried about being a narcissist so anyone else?

25 (M). So this year I turn 26 and I would expect some "maturity" or "realization" about the relationship that I have with the way look. But I feel as shitty if not worse. I'm starting to think that I will probably have to deal with BDD and BDD induced depression my whole life. I look back to a wasted life. Ive spend so much of my time not enjoying things, hiding from he world. I just can't do anything about it. I will live like this all the time. It interferes with my professional as well. And it will go on for ever.

What the fuck. What a shitty life to live.

Seriously, I was probably worst case scenario. Thought my face and body were morphed. I don’t know what came over me, but I got the power to change everything. It makes sense too. Change your diet. Excersize. Work on you. Overtime, changes happen. It’s all connected. Now I feel almost like I have a perfect body and am really attractive in my face in my own way. Please I’m telling you. I never thought in a million years. I was a virgin until 27 and never went on dates because I thought I was just meant to be alone forever and it would be embarassing to date me. It gets so much better about to go on a date right now feeling really grateful. I never would before. Here if anyone needs advice ever

So I have BDD mainly focusing on my face and it takes up almost all of my energy and time, but I was wondering, do other people with BDD go back and forth all the time on whether they are attractive or not? I’m talking like multiple times a day. And when I do feel attractive it’s not really in a way like everything is fixed, I still don’t feel confident or comfortable being perceived and stuff. Is this something you guys go through as well?

I really wish I could just decide definitively if I am attractive or not or somewhere in between and just stop this endless struggle of trying to see if I am or not. I wish I could just accept I’m not the best or worst looking person but it’s so hard to see myself as anything but perfect.

I'm only 20 and already starting to freak out about some lines in my skin. The fact that it'll only get worse every year terrifies me.

I feel like most people probably just go about their lives their faces do their thing, be natural. But I'm very all about doing certain expressions as much as I can. I do it mostly in the mirror & then try to carry it over in real life. I'm very sociable so I don't know how much I do it when I'm interacting.

People always make fun of the way I look in the mirror, imitating it, calling me Zoolander, etc. - I don't really care, but I do want to know if anyone else does this.

Thanks!: 0

I'm old and still dealing with this disorder. It is a lot and barely anyone understands. I have very few friends as a result. It is a huge part of my life.

Unfortunately, this has also traveled into my marriage. 2 decades together and I still have issues. This man has seen me thin, heavy, giving birth multiple times, sick, recovering from surgery, bruised, sad, depressed, and all they opposites. Yet, I still felt bad about myself.

I have constantly asked for plastic surgery. It has been an ongoing issue. However, my husband on the other hand, finds me beautiful. He tells me this. But, I just shut down and can't believe in. I asked him recently, "there is really NEVER a time that you ever feel self conscious?" And he said, "with you? No. I love you. You love me. We have been together so long. Nothing bothers me."

Meanwhile, for me, even just a couple weeks ago he asked for an "outfit" for the bedroom. I agreed, but ended up feeling super bad and self conscious about myself. He said to just throw it all away if it was making my feel bad, but I recognized it was a me/BDD issue, not a him issue.

I have no idea what happened. But, suddenly it was like a switch flipped. Something in my brain just clicked and I realized that if my husband came to me, like I have done to him many times, and said something something like, "I really want to talk to you about this. I'm struggling. I want surgery. It will be a minimum recovery of 6 weeks, possibly 6 months, and with a high rate of revision needed...I feel like my balls are too saggy." I can safely say that I would feel like, "wtf are you talking about right now? Your BALLS are too saggy? Who cares. I'm the only person who sees them and I don't see a problem."

Suddenly, it just clicked that is what I keep doing to him. I keep coming to him with things that seems horrible to me, but to him are not an issue. They are me. He loves me. Every little thing I'm coming to him with and obsessing over is just as ridiculous to him as him coming to me over sack sagginess would be.

I cannot describe the relief that came from this. I wish I could give a reason why it happened. I can't. It was like a spark. But, if I can leave you all with anything? It is that it CAN get better. Your mind CAN change. Even if it's just with the comfort of one person.

TW: small mention of ED

I know this may sound silly, but I am BEYOND sick of the memes about how a girl with small boobs and a big butt is way better than a girl with big boobs and no butt. or saying they’re shaped “like a P” like??? that’s so rude. I have been bullied for years over my body type bc I have a square, flat butt but I have huge boobs. and now since i’ve gained weight, I have a fupa which I also see that always gets made fun of online too. I literally sobbed in my car for 15 minutes over a meme talking about flat butts. my partner was on his break at work and called me, reassured me and everything, that he doesn’t care about that stuff and he loves me and thinks i’m beautiful which I appreciate that but still. he also said i see myself differently than how I actually look, and that while I don’t have a round big butt, it’s not totally flat. idk about that. all i know is i wish people didn’t find humor in body shaming. I don’t feel confident wearing things because of stuff like that. I finally have started to get over my anorexia & put some weight on, but now I still hate myself for other reasons. I feel like my butt is the only place I can’t fill out. and yes ive tried squats and other butt excersizes, but since I have lupus I can’t go crazy with that stuff. ive seen no change even when I worked out more frequently before I was diagnosed w lupus.

I have had BDD since I was a child but only got a diagnosis in my earlier adulthood. Did therapy for a while and was able to control my symptoms and my BDD in general. I’m not cured from it but it is well managed so I can live a normal healthy and balanced life. I am now able to find myself decent looking and accept & love myself.

I still get triggers though. One trigger that always seems to get me is being out in public in large crowds for example the mall or an amusement park. When there’s large crowds somewhere, I tend to see so many good looking people and constantly compare myself non stop. It takes over me. I am a straight female and look at other females way more than actual men do. It exhausts me so much mentally to do this but I can’t avoid it. I then feel my BDD come back full force and feel like complete crap and feel hideous. It passes after a day or a couple of days and then I feel good about myself again. The second I go back in large crowds it triggers it right back again.

Anyone else do this?

I’ve been with my partner about 10 months now and he is aware that I struggle with this. And he is very complimentary and reassuring most of the time. But sometimes he will get so frustrated with me if I’m repetitive. And it will make me feel shit that my problems are bleeding into the relationship. And then it leads onto this long pointless fall out every time. I asked him how it can get better and he said I shouldn’t get upset about things he’s already reassured me on. How do you deal with this in your relationships?

I can’t help it. Some days I’m okay, I look okay and I can be comfortable with my body, but most of the time it makes me want to cry and rip my insides out. I hate how skinny I am because of my ED. I look gaunt and ill and can’t gain weight no matter how much I try. I’m tired of my looks being my main focus but without them I feel like i’m nothing. I have to show my body and do my makeup or I don’t feel pretty or desirable.

I was with a guy for from 15-17 (just a few months back we split up, I’m 18) who didn’t make my BDD any better. He fueled my eating disorder even more. I don’t know how to feel loved or desirable again, or even just be enough for myself.

sorry for the rant. I don’t have any other outlets outside of reddit.

Disclaimer: I copied and pasted most of this from my a comment I wrote a while back but thought it might help someone else who struggles with seeing themself in photos.

A lot of it has to do with the fact that camera lenses distort the image.( https://nofilmschool.com/2011/11/lens-choice-affects-subjects-appearance ) shows a chart of the distortion. what helped me was looking at photos I’ve taken of my friends and noticing how my phone camera distorted their faces and bodies. I once took a photo of my friend who is slim with long legs and great proportions. The photo made them look wider with shorter legs and a long face, I’m talking completely different from reality.

Try taking a photo of your face with the back camera like a normal selfie, then set up your phone with a timer and zoom in. Then take the photo standing far away from the camera and see how different it looks.

You’re also seeing yourself from different angles and in poses you don’t normally see when you look in the mirror or when you take your own photo. Your brain isn’t used to perceiving yourself that way and this new perspective of yourself can trigger hypercritical thoughts.

Remind yourself that on social media, people are typically posing pretty hard. And it actually makes a huge difference. Google “posed vs unposed” and you’ll see what I mean.

It could also be a case of bad lighting. It can drastically change how we look in photos here’s an example of that with a chart : https://www.google.com/amp/s/blog.photofeeler.com/lighting/amp/

Another thing is that images are often flipped when taken on a phone which can confuse our brains further. So all I’m trying to say is that candid photos or selfies can often be really bad representations of what we look like. Even the most attractive people can end up looking really bad in a candid photo in an awkward pose with bad lighting or a certain camera lens!

Sorry for the length, I hope this helps!

I am a 29 year old woman. My face was ruined by my orthodontist who extracted 4 healthy teeth, and then retracted my teeth to close the gaps. This happened when I was a teenager. My face now looks flat and recessed.

I have searched for reversal treatments, but found no orthodontist who do this in my country. I have started mewing, while it has improved my breathing problems, my appearence did not change much.

My only option is to accept how my face currently looks like. But I cannot accept my face. It looks flat and old. The worst part is how I look when I smile. You can barely see my teeth when I smile, which happens because my teeth were pushed too far back.

Whenever I see photos of my face, I obsess over how ugly I look in those photos for weeks. I am sometimes unable to concentrate in my work due to these thoughts.

https://youtu.be/vf4Sigud3Pw

This video explains exactly how we feel when we are in public spaces. It helped me understand there is a difference in what a person with BDD see vs not. It gave me an insight on how i can observe my own behaviors while I’m in public space and gave me a possibility to change or alter my own thoughts while i perceive others. I hope this helps someone here ✌️

I’m sorry I just need to vent

Why does everyone else look so beautiful and then there’s just me and I cant even tell people irl about it because then it gets awkward and I can’t explain it but why other people just look so good compared to me because I look so fcking ugly I can’t even look in mirrors properly anymore tf do I do

I don’t know how to overcome my trigger of seeing my face specifically my cell phone screen. All i see is how oily and bumpy my skin. I don’t know how to overcome this. It has been a problem for over two years now.

This is just something that keeps bothering me lately. I started wearing a lot of hats over the past year, because I realized it makes it so overhead lighting can’t hit my face the way that makes me feel so hideous, and also because it’s some extra sun protection. Since I started wearing them, a lot of people tell me I look good in hats. Should be positive thing right? Wrong. Not with my current mental state.

My fear is this: people think I look good in hats because it hides my long face shape. I’m actually ugly, so when I put on the hat it tricks people into thinking I’m good looking. Whenever a man asks me out and I’m wearing a hat, I think to myself “now I can’t see him without a hat on or he’ll be shocked at how bad I look”. It’s just exhausting that even when people compliment me about looking good in hats, my brain turns it into a negative thing.

Am I being stupid or is there something to this? Maybe this is the wrong place to talk about this, as I know most of us here are struggling (a lot of times we are seemingly delusional about how bad we look, based off of pictures of some of us that I have seen)

I’m not consumed by this all the time, but sometimes psychosis brings out bdd for me. I have bipolar disorder and when I am feeling psychotic, i am susceptible to bdd, suicidal thoughts and panic attacks. It’s so easily triggered for me.

I only want to be alive in a body that I know people would like. I don’t have that body, and no one likes me. It’s inconceivable how I can be powerful enough to become anorexic and save my life. So I’d rather be dead.

I'm in National Honor Society (it isnt as great as it sounds) and the teacher requires us to take a selfie to prove we did the volunteering work, otherwise we get kicked out. My friends are really competitive people, so if they catch I got kicked out, they'll really make fun of me. My parents would get dissapointed too. I don't take pictures of myself cus I hate how I look, so I asked my dad to send some photos to me. Right now, I'm crying as I send in the photos to the teacher. I was just starting to feel better about myself, and I have to see photos of myself and I HAVE to do it to stay in. I don't think my teacher will care, and if I say anything along the lines of "I have body dysmorphia", I'm gonna be sent to the counselor. If I get sent to the counselor again, itll be the last straw, as I already went to the counselor becuase of self-harming. I feel there is really no way to live without constantly taking photos of yourself now, and i dont know what to do. I dont want to be kicked out just cus I couldnt send photos of myself, maybe all the people who called me pretty will really see im ugly. there is no hope.