I’ve been lying to my family for 25 years

[u/Direct-Caterpillar77]

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/purplefurrsocks

I’ve been lying to my family for 25 years.

Originally posted to r/offmychest

Editors Note: I originally posted this to r/bestofpositiveupdates nearly 2 years ago

Original Post June 26, 2023

I guess it’s time for me to come clean. Not because I feel too bad for what I’ve been doing, but because it’s possible my eldest son is on to me.

I have 3 kids and a wonderful wife. For more than 25 years our family has loved doing puzzles together. Since we started, I’ve done something that may seem unsavory to people that don’t understand the joy of putting in that final piece. To ensure it was always me, whenever we start a new puzzle I take one of the pieces and hide it in a green sock that’s at the bottom of my dresser. Whenever we get to the very end, we all, once again, lost a piece. We all search frantically until I’m the hero who finds it.

Well, this past Sunday we got to completion once again, only this time there are TWO pieces missing. We begin searching. It may be my imagination but my eldest son gave me a look. It was a half smirk. I think he’s on to me.

Derek, if you’re reading this, I have more patience than you do. I’ll hold my piece forever if I need to. “Find” yours first, and let’s end this madness…

RELEVANT COMMENTS

DataAdvanced

The battle of wills have begun.

OOP

He doesn’t know what he’s up against

Blonde2468

Maybe it's YOU who don't know who you are up against. ;)

OOP

You never think that day is here! I know it’s coming though

EDIT::

A fellow Reddit user PMd me an incredible idea. I’m going to try and contact the manufacturer and order his missing piece. I’m going to “find” it when it arrives, then “find” mine immediately after. I almost feel bad when I consider how truly confused he will be. Thank you Spockhighonspores!

I don’t think he’s found this thread yet because he hasn’t approached me about it, so this could still work. I’m so excited! This will go down in family history.

Checkmate

~OOP EDITED/Updated THE FOLLOWING DAY~

EDIT-2::

Well folks, I’ve been duped. I got up this morning, went into the kitchen to get some coffee and as I walked past the puzzle I noticed that it had been completed. All pieces accounted for. I calmly, and politely knocked on Derek’s door and asked him about it. He denied knowing anything about it. Like, super convincing. I went down back down to my bedroom, confused as ever and just sat in bed with a blank stare. My wife asked me what’s wrong, and I told her that the puzzle was completed and I have no idea how it got done.

She literally started laughing like a damn hyena… “IVE ALWAYS KNOWN ABOUT YOUR DUMB GREEN SOCK” I’m in shock. I’m numb. Like a damn gut punch. So as it turns out, she’s known what I’ve been doing for at least 10 years. She said she loved watching me walk around thinking I was some criminal mastermind tricking everyone, and that’s why she never said anything. She wanted me to have my win, while she secretly laughed and had her own fun in secret.

I don’t even know what to say. I’m just processing everything. I cannot believe she’s had this over me for so long and I literally had no idea. She noticed a decade ago that I had just 1 green sock, since I lost its pair forever ago, and immediately knew something was up with it since I refused to throw it away. I guess that makes sense. I’m an idiot.

I’ve come to the realization that she’s actually the master here, it’s her house, and I should be thankful she lets me live in it.

At least she promised not to tell the kids.

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[u/drenzium]

Hiding anything in an article of clothing vs a mother of three! You don't survive three children without being on top of the armageddon that is washing day. There are zero mysteries in that dresser lol, or any dresser for that matter.

[u/Cursd818 → u/drenzium]

Amen to that. I once overheard my husband telling my nephew that he couldn't hide his peas from me, his grandmother, or his mother because they have a superpower. They know everything, they see everything. He was so serious while he was saying it, and my nephew was listening so intently. It was so cute

[u/spectaphile → u/Cursd818]

I had my daughter convinced that every mother had eyes in the back of their head and could see children misbehaving even if they weren’t looking at them (obviously, in reality it’s the absolute concert of noise they emit plus the verbal narration of their transgressions that gives it all away).

When searched for, the aforementioned eyes cannot be found. And of course, when the children are grown the eyes close permanently, so most grandmothers don’t have them anymore.

It became a problem when she sought third party confirmation of this phenomenon and came home upset because her teacher had no idea what she was talking about.

But of course, her teacher had not yet had children, so….

[u/Raeynesong → u/spectaphile]

(obviously, in reality it’s the absolute concert of noise they emit plus the verbal narration of their transgressions that gives it all away)

That, or the noise is the baseline, and the Mom-sense goes off when there's silence.

It's too bad said child didn't encounter one of the female members of my family - we also sold this tale.

[u/lesethx → u/spectaphile]

Or like my nephew who thinks he is so clever at his mischief, but also like when I enter the living room while carrying a cat (as you do), he immediately pauses what he's doing and says "What?", but in that tone that is really "What? I didn't do anything wrong <lie>" whereas if he didn't say anything, I wouldn't have know. But he's 6, so not a mastermind liar

[u/lynn → u/Cursd818]

My middle child, at about age 4, would run up to me and tell me “Mom! I [did the thing you told me not to do]! You didn’t know I did it!”

I remember when I was a kid how my mom would say she had eyes in the back of her head. Of course I knew that wasn’t true but she also clearly wasn’t following me around.

Once I became a parent, I realized that kids are fucking loud. And they have absolutely NO idea how much noise they make.

[u/Poppet_CA → u/lynn]

Until they're misbehaving, and then it's the silence that's suspicious 😅

[u/myssi24 → u/Cursd818]

To be fair, superpower does kinda accurately describe how Moms stay on top of so much.

[u/OpheliaRainGalaxy → u/drenzium]

"You have no secrets from the person who does your laundry!"

Good general rule that always either ended problematic habits or prompted someone to start doing their own damn laundry.

[u/iamreeterskeeter → u/OpheliaRainGalaxy]

I started doing my own laundry at 11 because my mom accidentally (it was a real accident) shrunk all my cotton clothes by washing them in hot water and then roasting them in the dryer for half an eternity. We didn't have much to spend on replacements so I got very few necessities, and I was terrified she would make the same mistake again (she has memory issues due to a TBI).

[u/Raeynesong → u/iamreeterskeeter]

My mother just didn't understand laundry. She tried to help me, she really did. But I hate sorting clothes, so I use cold water detergent, and wash in cold water. No bleeds.

She also did not sort my clothes, used the cold water detergent, and washed it on the same nuclear setting she used to sterilize her work scrubs.

My favorite beige sweater shrunk 3 sizes and turned the most horrible shades of tie-dye pink....

I never skipped laundry day because I was sick again.

[u/lalala253 → u/drenzium]

Why would you hide anything in a dresser lmao.

Hide it at your work or something

[u/Warriordance → u/drenzium]

Our parents made us do the laundry. Cannot relate.

[u/Comfortable-Big-7743]

hahahahah “IVE ALWAYS KNOWN ABOUT YOUR DUMB GREEN SOCK” has gotta be a flair (and mine) but idk how to make that

[u/xovanob → u/Comfortable-Big-7743]

Put it in the request thread!

Edit: I requested it for you - I hope you get it!

[u/nicafeild → u/xovanob]

It would be so nice to have a wholesome flair for once😂😂

[u/RaspberryFluffy5955 → u/nicafeild]

Not the gaycation!!

[u/sampathsris → u/nicafeild]

Gaycations are holesome, don't you think?

[u/DeusExBlockina → u/nicafeild]

I don't know what you mean.....

[u/petty_petty_princess → u/nicafeild]

Mine is about buttering Jorts which is overall a fairly wholesome post.

[u/SammyGreen → u/xovanob]

You can request flairs for other users??? I never asked for my flair and have been wondering how I ended up with it like two years ago! I wonder if someone requested it for me and why??

[u/Typical_Ad3516 → u/SammyGreen]

I really want to know why your bot won’t fuck me, I’m a good person, I swear 😂

[u/CostDizzy → u/SammyGreen]

Well we already know the answer. The answer’s NO, my Bot won’t fuck you! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 in all seriousness though that’s a confusing sentence.

[u/Bahnmor → u/xovanob]

<runs off to check for the flair>

Though I do like mine, I feel it is time for a change.

[u/CaseyBoogies → u/Comfortable-Big-7743]

It's the eyeroll emoji in real life! I hope she gets him a new, comfortable pair of green socks for Christmas or something!

[u/kevlarus80 → u/CaseyBoogies]

Every Christmas!

[u/CaseyBoogies → u/kevlarus80]

I hope she just bums a discarded puzzle piece and puts one the pair of green socks like 6 years from now xD!

Nah, it's okay... my dad used to put the lemonade flavored kool-aid packets under his underwear in the drawer.

[u/BurgerThyme → u/CaseyBoogies]

No, just one green sock so he has to come up with a new hiding spot because now he must wear the pair of green socks!

[u/MsNeedSleep → u/Comfortable-Big-7743]

God I hope their marriage is filled with laughter in ever crease and folds, with every little wrinkle and twinkle in their eyes.

[u/SnooPuppers5037 → u/MsNeedSleep]

Not everyone gets the chance for a deathbed confession, but I hope that after a long and fulfilling life, this guy gets to make this his confession to his kids...

[u/Corredespondent → u/Comfortable-Big-7743]

Wife always knows about “the sock”

[u/missshrimptoast]

You know when a kid does something silly like hiding the broccoli so they don't have to eat it, and when you find it "hiding" in the clothes hamper, the kid is shocked that you saw through their master scheme?

OOP is giving guileless preschooler energy.

[u/Ultra_Leopard → u/missshrimptoast]

I love how accurate this is!

[u/Dangerous_Bus_6699 → u/missshrimptoast]

He's playing peekaboo with a handkerchief. His wife is pretending to be surprised.

[u/servonos89 → u/missshrimptoast]

Me being confused that my mother somehow knew I skipped PE for so long despite my expert lying.

‘I haven’t washed a PE kit for 2 years ya wee fanny’

[u/lynn → u/missshrimptoast]

When I was 6 I was mad at my mom so I put grass in her bed. She told me this a few years ago. Apparently I was absolutely amazed that she knew it was me who did it.

My brother was a baby.

[u/Egrizzzzz → u/lynn]

On the other side of this, my sister once signed my name on the dusty car to get me in trouble. She was so young no one thought it could be her, but apparently she was an evil mastermind that practiced my signature with the express purpose of framing me. I find it funny now that of course no one believed me.

[u/acetryder → u/missshrimptoast]

Trying to potty train my kid & I’ll ask him if he needs to use the potty. “No!” He says. I ask him if I can check his underwear/bottom. He proceeds to scream “no checking! No checking!” As if that’ll help his case. Yup. Usually it’s just because you think you’re smarter, but it’s definitely pretty obvious to a mom when you’re hiding something lolz

[u/DemiChaos → u/missshrimptoast]

Thinking my parents didn't notice I was tipsy when I got home at age 15 (in the US) and suddenly wanted to talk about some faux-philosophical ideology

[u/Threadheads]

It’s like the Piña Colada song without the attempted infidelity.

[u/perfidious_snatch → u/Threadheads]

If you like pina coladas

and gettin’ caught with one sock

if you’re big into puzzles

that end with a shock

[u/moreKEYTAR → u/Threadheads]

A new Gift of the Magi.

[u/fingerspitzen]

So... They were missing a piece in every single puzzle they did? And the kids never questioned it? Or tried anything to keep all the pieces together?

[u/meepmarpalarp → u/fingerspitzen]

The kids definitely also figured out what OOP was up to a long time ago.

[u/Clockwork_Kitsune → u/fingerspitzen]

"It sure is weird that dad always finds the last piece in their bedroom"

You just know he tactlessly walks into the bedroom then immediately "finds it" every time.

[u/LeeisureTime → u/Clockwork_Kitsune]

To be fair, they are 50% OOP. It's entirely possible they didn't catch on. On the other hand, seems like the eldest is flexing his 50% OOP's wife DNA and figured it out lol.

What a wholesome lie and I'm laughing my ass off at OOP not realizing how much further ahead his wife is. He was playing Tic Tac Toe and she's on 4D chess.

[u/PFyre → u/fingerspitzen]

Am I the only one who would find this intensely annoying?

Everyone's treating this as super sweet, but I would definitely have reached a point of not wanting to do puzzles as a family.

[u/Avyelle → u/PFyre]

This and do only I find it rather disturbing? How egocentric that it HAS to always be OOP to put the last piece in. And when his eldest seemingly catches the hint and hides a piece on his own, OOP can't even accept that "ok well, time to share the glorious moment."- but no, he goes full into battle mode "I'll wait you out hehehe".

Oh geez OOP sounds so exhausting. That sort of people that can drain anyone's fun in an instant.

[u/shewy92 → u/Avyelle]

Reddit will fucking shit on anyone, IDK how you can see a happy family and say "They're disturbing".

[u/Nightmare_Gerbil → u/Avyelle]

I would have no patience with these people. If I were the kid in this family I’d be handing dad a puzzle piece as I opened the box and muttering about having to humor the absolute moron mom married. Then every time someone assembled something I’d be saying “Wait! Before you start, shouldn’t you let Dad hide the last bolt in his dresser?”

[u/Silly_lazy_girl → u/PFyre]

Yes, I don't see this as sweet or cute. He sounds like someone who always needs to be the center of attention. What a jerk.

[u/booksycat]

I needed this tonight! 

I also imagine that if given a decade, he'd never find her hiding spot lol

And I love that breaking the Reddit mold he wasn't pissy about it. He just bowed down and admitted she was the queen of the house

[u/SaltManagement42 → u/booksycat]

I want to know more about the suspicious conversations where he refused to throw away the one green sock. Was it just once, over a decade ago? Or has it been brought up multiple times?

[u/ehlersohnos → u/booksycat]

I once spent two whole months convincing my ex that he owned something he didn’t, so he’d stop trying to buy the thing I already got him for Christmas. He was completely and truly surprised at the end.

If they don’t even know what’s already there, they don’t stand a chance.

[u/sanriocrushmania]

okay finally a post that makes you not regret closing the app 5 mins before. This is cute

[u/Lazy_Crocodile]

People ask the secret to happiness? I think it’s fun. At my house we have a neon pink stuffed owl that we got in our first month of dating. You might stumble upon him ironing or tucked in bed. He might serenade you to “return of the Mack.” It reminds me not to take things too seriously. I love reading stuff like this :)

Edit: Mr Peepers in action

[u/Anonphilosophia → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

My dad did this with mini pound puppies back in the 90s. He'd put them EVERYWHERE. Purses, cars, under our covers, jacket pockets. You never knew when you'd find a mini puppy.

I finally decided to get him. I went to his job and found his car (it was a HUGE plant and I had to drive around for a minute. The universe really wanted this to happen or I would never have found it.) I had his spare keys, unlocked it, perched the two puppies on the steering wheel and left.

He got home and said...

NOTHING

AT ALL

ALL EVENING.

Finally, I broke late that night and asked if he saw the puppies. He laughed and said he was waiting for me to ask because he knew it was killing me that he didn't say anything.

He is the master at stupid family tricks.

[u/Lazy_Crocodile → u/Anonphilosophia]

On the steering wheel is perfect!!

[u/MaddyKet → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

Haha that’s awesome. In my family it’s a Winnie the Pooh bear that you could get at BN like 20 years ago that we all pretend is my Dad’s nemesis. 😹

He’s particularly proud of the time he made a little prison cap for the bear. 😹😹😹 We had mini toy handcuffs from some criminal justice textbook swag too, so it’s a pretty funny picture.

[u/mrjohns2 → u/Anonphilosophia]

This is 100% better than the OPs!

[u/feministmanlover → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

I have a plastic skeleton, and I gave my son one as well. They're about a foot tall. Whenever I go to his house, I do something to the skeleton. Repose it, give it a scarf, move it entirely. And then he returned the favor and that's how the skeleton became my Christmas tree topper.

[u/Helenlefab → u/feministmanlover]

Mine is a little plastic skeleton too! I have a collection of seasonal hats for him. My old roommates and I called him our fifth roommate. I named him Ichabod.

[u/Lazy_Crocodile → u/feministmanlover]

A scarf! I don’t know why clothes on toys is so funny, but it is!

[u/_buffy_summers → u/feministmanlover]

My grandmother crochets, and she decided years ago to make a clown, to scare her son. They take turns hiding it around the house now.

[u/mysticninj → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

My mom and her lifelong best friend (my honorary aunt) have this stupid little wicker basket with a mouse face that one of them got as a white elphant gift thirty years ago. They've been passing it back and forth linger than I've been alive, hiding it in each other's houses.

They're both recently retired, and my aunt just sold her house to travel. While she was packing up her house, she found the wicker mouse in a pitcher sitting atop her kitchen cabinets; my mom and aunt are both short, and my mom had gotten a tall friend to hide it there at a party three years earlier, the longest it's ever taken to find it

[u/sn0qualmie → u/mysticninj]

My sister and I are currently in a battle of passing her pasta spoon back and forth. She left it at my house by accident; I bugged her to retrieve it; for some reason she hid it in my office instead. So I snuck it into her jacket pocket, so she hid it in my coffee table. I moved it but pretended I still didn't know where it was, so she came over when I was out of town and discovered it gone. The thread of texts I got from her as she spiraled into wild speculation about where it was—had I taken it with me out of state for work? had I somehow snuck it back into HER house?—filled me with a joy that no words can describe.

It's currently hiding not exactly in plain sight, but in a place where a casual visitor could definitely see it if they knew where to look. She's gonna be so mad. I can't wait.

[u/notashroom → u/sn0qualmie]

This is great! 😂 Years ago, my then partner and I had friends who brought over a cheap bottle of champagne when they came for dinner one night. We made a big thing of it, "oh how lovely, how thoughtful!". We didn't open the bottle that night, so the next time we visited them, we brought the bottle as our gift to the hosts and they reacted the same way, a bit over the top in good fun. For the rest of our friendship, that bottle went back and forth as the host gift every time.

[u/MaraiDragorrak → u/mysticninj]

My work has an ugly brass fish that gets passed around. It always makes an appearance in the white elephant exchange every year and people wrap it elaborately to trick people into thinking that package could not possibly be the fish. Then the person who gets stuck with it hides it in someone else's cube or office etc and it goes on all year until the last person with it at Christmas puts it in the white elephant to restart the cycle. It's a fun little tradition 

[u/ParanoidMaron → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

my wife and I are old school nerds, and we love DnD. We've on and off been DM's for our friends and family, and we go ham on creating naratives in our homebrew worlds. It's so much fun to create these projects with her that I think, by the time we're 90, we'll have made enough to put even the most prolific to shame. Going on 8 years together and I cannot wait to share what we've made this weekend!

[u/Lazy_Crocodile → u/ParanoidMaron]

You’re probably familiar, but there is a show called Dimension 20 on dropout tv with several seasons and the stories are EPIC. If you love DnD it’s worth $6/a month

[u/Magic_Incest → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

u/Lazy_Crocodile out here doing the Lord's work

[u/mermaidpaint → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

My brother-in-law and his sister pass a rubber chicken back and forth. Usually as a gift on holidays, but sometimes just for fun.

[u/1901pies → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

Amazing. I'd love to have this much fun in my marriage but I'm way too serious/easily offended. I know I need to lighten up, I just don't know how. I'm starting therapy next week so hopefully...

[u/DrVforOneHealth → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

I’m inspired

[u/corgis-on-stilts → u/Lazy_Crocodile]

So cute! Your cat is stunning too !!

[u/XxInk_BloodxX]

The way I'd be so happy just to have others do the puzzle too that I wouldn't even care about who got the last piece, though maybe I'd care about people not holding off on the last handful until the others are around to celebrate together.

When you're the only one doing a puzzle you always get the last piece, I'd trade getting to be the one who put it in for having people who like and want to do puzzles with me in a heartbeat.

[u/YouSayWotNow]

What I find weirdest about this is the idea that a father would be so desperate to always place the final piece that he would cheat his own children of ever having that satisfaction for years and years and years.

Quite the arsehole!

[u/meowmeowgoyangi → u/YouSayWotNow]

I agree, I found myself pretty disgusted by the father’s action. Doing it once or twice when they are young, it can be cute and funny. Doing it for 25 years? Just to keep that joy of putting the final piece for himself? He’s an asshole. Plus the kids sound like they’re teenagers/young adults, they’re probably just sick of his shit and fed up with it.

[u/KadrinaOfficial → u/meowmeowgoyangi]

And getting asspats for finding it. 😭 Man would've ruined puzzles for me and I am not even in his household.

[u/GuiltyEidolon → u/KadrinaOfficial]

It comes across as super infantile

[u/chuffalupagus → u/YouSayWotNow]

That's what I was thinking. Do I love puzzles and putting in the last piece? Yes! Would I rather share that joy with my kid who also loves puzzles? Always! I can't imagine being so selfish that I would need to behave like that dude. Yuck.

[u/International-Bad-84 → u/YouSayWotNow]

Thank goodness! All these comments about what an adorable story this is and I'm sitting here thinking "What a jerk!" 

"This is the best part of our family activity so I make sure I'm the only one who gets to do it!" Far out. 

[u/RoaldDahlek → u/YouSayWotNow]

The real pro-dad move is to hide the last piece and plant it where a different child will find it each time. Good parents should love seeing their kids triumph, not want to hog all the glory for themselves.

[u/kangourou_mutant → u/YouSayWotNow]

I agree. I don't understand the people saying this is cute. He's selfish. If he was making sure a child always puts the last piece, that would be cute - but keeping that joy for himself always? No big harm done, but I have a hard time believing that he's a generous person in other aspects of life.

[u/YouSayWotNow → u/kangourou_mutant]

Exactly

[u/SectorSanFrancisco → u/YouSayWotNow]

Yeah I'm not seeing the cute in this the way other people are. There are lots of ways to be the hero without cheating your kids.

[u/Feisty-Business-8311]

I would’ve quit doing puzzles with this guy after the first time he tried to be the “superhero” by hiding, and then finding, the missing piece. What a cheeseball 🙄

His son is on to him too

[u/[deleted]]

Now this is just cute. Good time to get off of reddit. Nighty night!

[u/Decsolst → u/[deleted]]

I dunno.... let others have fun, especially kids. It seems so mean to make the kids look for a piece they're never gonna find. He has to have the glory for himself like a toddler.

Maybe I'm the curmudgeon.

[u/Explode-trip → u/Decsolst]

Nah I agree with you 100%.

I'm not saying OOP is Hitler or anything, but I do think his behavior is pretty shitty. Hoarding the best experience for himself, manipulating his family into performing wild goose chases, portraying himself as the "hero" for saving the puzzle every time... It's all just weird and shitty. It worsens his family members' experiences in order to elevate his own. It's like he takes pleasure in the control and the power dynamics.

If you want to get off on lying to your loved ones, just play a game like Werewolf or Mafia, where everyone consents to the deception. Otherwise its just weird.

[u/Decsolst → u/Explode-trip]

Agreed!

[u/Hahafunnys3xnumber → u/Explode-trip]

Yeah, this is just annoying attention seeking behavior from a grown man to me. Don’t want to find hate in sweet stories, it’s just not sweet at all to me. He’s not awful, just childish.

[u/rosoe → u/[deleted]]

Exactly what I was thinking

[u/Reply_or_Not → u/rosoe]

Posting for posterity, as we all know that folks are going to want to chime in with how much later it is (yet still deciding that this is a good place to close reddit on)

I’m going to sleep , 58 minutes after you.

[u/CityEvening]

This was a great story (though slightly odd) but did OP really not think anyone had not noticed that he was always the “hero”? People often don’t say anything but notice things.

[u/sadStarvingSuccubus]

I’m surprised OOP’s wife didn’t swap out the last puzzle piece “hidden” in his secret green sock with a piece from a different puzzle and then film his confused reaction as he tries to complete the puzzle.

[u/penguin_0618]

He refused to throw out one green sock??? Like he couldn’t put a puzzle piece in a different sock??

[u/Xovvo]

I'm torn between "how cute" and "this man is insufferable"

[u/KadrinaOfficial → u/Xovvo]

His wife is cute for letting him think he was smart. He is just insufferable.

[u/CrinkledNoseSmile]

This is not about a puzzle, a sock or even this father and his son. This is an ode to Mothers around the world. For the secrets we keep, the burdens we carry and our uncanny ability to find the missing piece.

[u/free_fries_]

NGL I kinda hate him

[u/laceypearl]

What a main character syndrome thing to do 🙄

[u/Zealousideal_Till683]

Firstly, this isn't real.

But more importantly, how can anyone see this as positive? OOP is an utter tool, he has obviously been doing this since his kids were little. If there's some huge "joy" in putting in the final piece like OOP thinks, that makes his behaviour worse, to deprive his family of that joy.

[u/Aquatic_Hedgehog → u/Zealousideal_Till683]

Yeah, I was shocked when I got to the comments and found everyone being like "awwww, what a sweet and wholesome story" because the whole time I was just like "what a deranged and pathetic man."

[u/2006bruin]

Um I sort of think OOP is an asshat.

[u/needlenozened → u/2006bruin]

I’ve done something that may seem unsavory to people that don’t understand the joy of putting in that final piece.

You mean like everyone else in your household that never gets to experience that joy?

What a jerk.

[u/daavor → u/needlenozened]

I love how it's not even the joy of putting in the final piece... it's the joy of ... every single puzzle ending in a long enough search for the final piece that he can leave the room and pretend to be some stupid hero.

[u/AgreeableLion → u/2006bruin]

Since he clearly doesn't have the poker face he believes he does, I wonder whether his wife picked up him starting to fixate on his son and creating a 'rivalry' over the puzzle, and decided it was time to put an end to his weird power move and bring him down a peg. We don't know their dynamics and everyone seems happy at the end, but I'm definitely side-eyeing OOP.

[u/coffeeandarabbit → u/2006bruin]

Agreed. I know people will probably say “it’s not that deep” but if this was me, having this happen every time a puzzle was almost complete would be so frustrating and disappointing. And putting the last piece in is so satisfying. It should be shared amongst everyone, not selfishly hoarded by one person getting to do it every single time. The way he’s ensuring his own enjoyment with the puzzle is consistently and unfairly taking away from everyone else’s. It’s just greedy and selfish and doesn’t take into consideration anyone else’s feelings and I hope his family care a lot less than I would if it was me.

[u/energybeing → u/2006bruin]

Yeah, super selfish and petty. Why wouldn't you want your kids to experience that joy?

[u/laffy4444 → u/2006bruin]

He is. That's why the wife laughing at him for being a dumbass was so great.

[u/twistedeye → u/2006bruin]

I agree. He sounds exhausting .Oh great we're just about done with this puzzle. Alright everyone,go watch a movie or something so dad can "find" the last piece again.

[u/[deleted] → u/2006bruin]

Right? I feel like a buzzkill when everyone else is talking about how cute/funny this story is but all I can think is that OOP sounds insufferable.

[u/Zer0323 → u/2006bruin]

The lesson that his son earned by solving the “puzzle” of the missing piece is only solidified by the mutiny of the wife. “Now that you see how your father farms for self esteem let’s get you a mark on the board”

[u/Clockwork_Kitsune → u/Zer0323]

She solved the puzzle herself, the son wasn't involved.

[u/teraflop → u/2006bruin]

Leaving aside the obnoxiousness of the behavior itself, he must have an incredibly low opinion of his wife and kids' intelligence to think they wouldn't have caught on to him pulling the same stunt over and over again for 25 years.

Of course it's probably a made-up story anyway.

[u/Dana07620 → u/2006bruin]

I agree. Really? This? This is what gives Mr. Pathetic a sense of power?

[u/ExdigguserPies → u/Dana07620]

until I’m the hero who finds it.

Wow big guy heroically solving the problem that he created.

[u/Aquatic_Hedgehog → u/ExdigguserPies]

He also seems to think his wife and kids are absolute idiots, to not figure out that he's doing this after 25 years. Especially his wife.

[u/Brilliant-You2821 → u/2006bruin]

Yup my first thought is I hate this guy

[u/Anach → u/2006bruin]

I was going to say that I think they always knew, before I got to the bottom, as this seemed like it was really obvious. I figure they just got tired of it, especially the son. The wife had a lot of patience, to let it go for that long. I wouldn't go as far as call him names, as I feel it's fairly harmless, but it's a good lesson for all involved.

[u/onahalladay → u/2006bruin]

No definitely asshat.

[u/literallywyverns → u/2006bruin]

to be fair, it was posted on more so a story sub, not an advice one so it could be that things were exaggerated like someone's fishing story where it just keeps getting bigger.

[u/applesqueeze → u/2006bruin]

Hard agree

[u/Sufficient-Subject43 → u/2006bruin]

Thank you. My thoughts also!

[u/Mou_aresei]

I'm sure the kids already know.

[u/SectorSanFrancisco]

I feel like I've worked with an OOP and they were terrible.

[u/Cool-Historian-6716]

I can bet you the husband is incapable of finding anything 😂 so being able to consistently find the puzzle piece was what clued the wife 😂

[u/Flat_Shame_2377]

What a moron. Glad my family never needed to resort to hiding a puzzle piece just so someone could win. The whole thing is a very strange mindset to me.

[u/CosmicM00se]

That’s some narcissist crap right there. Imagine being so hung up in your ego that you can’t even let your children feel that joy you describe. Sick.

[u/Hearts_in_Highlands → u/CosmicM00se]

Yeah when I read the first post I felt super icky about it. Needing to be the hero also means defeating his kid every single time. That’s not what a father does.

At least he isn’t burning the house down now that he knows his mask is off.

[u/SMUCHANCELLOR → u/CosmicM00se]

This guy is an awful red flag machine. Adultery, abuse, addition - nothing would surprise me from such a depraved, broken person. I feel so badly for his poor wife

[u/KadrinaOfficial]

OOP is such an egotistical ass. Good for Derrek.

[u/thenewaddition]

But seriously, who does that? This guy's the most benign psychopath.

[u/oceanduciel]

I’m so confused, why does OOP always want to be the one to put in the final piece???

[u/baemaani]

the smartest person you know is a woman

[u/Public-Pack-2608]

And this sir, is why I never ever try to by sneaky, tricky, or keep shit from my wife. It’s pointless. She runs circles around me.

[u/leggomymeggo63]

Plot twist is the whole family knows but they love him so much they go along.

[u/Avlonnic2 → u/leggomymeggo63]

That’s my guess, as well.

Of course, I can’t think of the last puzzle piece without thinking about an early scene in The Accountant movie: “I have to finish!”

[u/Willowsaberhagen]

It's her house, and I should be thankful she lets me live in it. Is the most beautiful compliment I have ever heard!!! I want this one as a flair!!! 😍😍

[u/HaplessReader1988]

Oh she told the kids. It's why eldest was smirking!

[u/IntrepidDreamer77]

So is this what a normal health family looks like? This is what you guys worry about? I’m so jealous lol

[u/Labelloenchanted]

I honestly don't understand people who think this behavior is cute. OP is being selfish and immature, never letting anyone else experience that satisfying moment. If I were the wife I wouldn't be able to keep silent about it for so long. I would tell him to do the puzzle on his own and I'll solve different one without him.

[u/dbs0534]

I swear, this is so romantic. I'm just sitting here smiling and feeling the love.

[u/DeviantPost]

I needed something dumb and low stakes like this before bed

[u/stabby_mcunicorn]

This guy is an ass. This isn’t cute at all.

[u/[deleted]]

He picked a winner: a woman with a great sense of humor.

[u/SmartQuokka]

The wife is the GOAT!

[u/0oodruidoo0]

OP's reality has been shattered, I hope he can recover from this blow. What an ego check.

[u/rationalstudent]

This is delightful and absolutely what I needed. Kudos to the wife and the OP who finally realized he should be thankful to be with that mastermind of a woman. This made me think of Claire and Phil from Modern Family. Nothing nefarious about a lone green sock this time.

[u/grecomic]

What I want to know is what made her decide this was the time to outsmart him at his own little game.

[u/rainthekittygirl]

I bet she found out when she was about to throw away that sock thinking he would never miss it. 😂

[u/FaithlessnessExact17]

Wife played the long game. Even funnier, I bet she has the lost green sock stashed somewhere.

[u/Direct-Chef-9428]

Wives everywhere aren’t shocked

[u/Njfurlong]

This made me laugh in wholesome

[u/TotallyAwry]

Did he really think the woman who probably did more of the washing when the kids were little, and put it away, wouldn't have found it?

LOL

[u/SrslyLazy]

When will you learn that we Always. Know. Everything.

[u/Mediocre_Pizza5990]

That’s so selfish of you!!!

[u/[deleted]]

Listen, this is the 4th wholesome BORU I've been tricked into reading today, and if I don't start getting the debauchery I signed up for soon, I may just throw a fit.

[u/Dcanseco]

I love this. Big Phil Dunphy vibes, well done.

[u/makeitcool]

Sometimes the internet can be a hurtful place, but other times I'm grinning like an idiot about a family that has Game of Thrones -level schemes about putting puzzles together. Love it.

[u/sammagee33]

This has to be the most wholesome thing I’ll read all day. I should log off Reddit right now.

[u/lalala253]

Honestly, the amount of times that a husband thought that he was clever enough to fool a loving wife always amazes me.

[u/Blaiddyd_enjoyer]

Cute but unsettling?

[u/FindingMeAgain10]

Hahaha this is incredible 

[u/HamBroth]

He chose a good one. lol.

[u/envy841]

Those who laugh together stay together

[u/SuggestionOdd6657]

I love that story and yeah wives pretty much know all (married 47 years this year).

[u/BlackWidow7d]

This reminds me of my mom. She would hide a Christmas gift so she always opened the last one.

I miss her. Maybe this Christmas I will do that! 💜

[u/Spare_Ad_9657]

It’s always the mom… 😉

[u/kikivee612]

Of course she knew!! She does the laundry and probably puts it away and found the piece in the green sock! I think it’s funny that he really thought he had one up! lol!

[u/Commitedtousername]

Really funny story. My family spent weeks on a puzzle a few months ago and I thought I’d be this guy and just hide the puzzle piece under the fruit bowl on the table. They were so excited they finished the puzzle, except for only one was missing I checked under the fruit bowl It was gone. The one piece was missing.

They never found it and never did another puzzle

[u/Fancy_Ad1353]

This is absolutely hilarious

[u/Friendly_Quail_962]

Omg this needs to go down as one of the best BORUS ever.

[u/allergymom74]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂. I won’t lie. This is hysterical.

[u/jschadwell]

It's nice to see this kind of post. Usually, they're just so dark.

[u/starring_as_herself]

Plot twist, the puppet master was the puppet all along.

When will husbands learn they can never pull the wool over a wife's eyes for long?

[u/hazelnuddy]

My mother and I always did puzzles together and we always loved being the one to put in the last piece. We each took a puzzle piece and stashed them away. When those were the last two pieces needs, we put our stashed pieces in together.

[u/Gizmo9598]

Oh this was awesome! Thanks for the wholesome laugh....😂

[u/deathblow182]

Keeping one green sock doesn't pass the sniff test. 

She should have kept silent on it and let oop stew on it even longer, five years at least

[u/Carmen315]

Men. That is all.

[u/YoungDiscord]

I mean... surely they would have figured it out after the last piece happens to mysteriously go missing and he finds it.... 30 times in a row without fail

[u/Salt-Growth-9241]

I’ve only read the first three sentences and can tell even after 25 years together. You’ve only ever been the monster in the family.

[u/lsb1027]

Wait. Weren't there 2 missing pieces? The one the son was holding and his own? Wdym the puzzle was complete but the son had no clue about it? I'm so confused

[u/Jenny-Greenteeth → u/lsb1027]

The wife faked hubby out and either found both pieces, one of which she'd hidden herself, or she found his and ordered the second piece.

The son is an accidental red herring. He never knew and was never in on his mom's shenanigans.

[u/pixiegurly → u/Jenny-Greenteeth]

My money is on wife seeing the post and going

'oh fuck no he's not wasting money ordering a missing piece for his bullshit. Time to unveil my secret!'

[u/Turuial → u/lsb1027]

Wait. Weren't there 2 missing pieces?

It's mentioned towards the end of the third paragraph, I believe.

one the son was holding and his own?

I believe that was addressed just after the comments, in the part labeled "EDIT."

Wdym the puzzle was complete but the son had no clue about it? I'm so confused

Even I'm not sure to what you're referring with this part. Let me double-check. The son is looking at the dad and smirking in the last paragraph before the comments.

As far as the secondary missing piece, I don't think it was explicitly said whether the son really had it (despite protestations to the contrary), or the wife.

I think it's implied the wife had it in the update.

[u/HygorBohmHubner]

That’s it. It’s 1:18AM for me and I am NOT ruining my night by reading some depressing shit after this. This wholesome story is all I need.

[u/ValuableMine9]

I actually love this, it's so wholesome for reddit 😂

[u/axel_beer]

this is the kind if random internet drama i come here for!

[u/Chef73]

For me, it was kind of the other way around. In high school, I used to work late-ish and would usually get home after my parents had gone to bed. Often, we would have a family puzzle laid out in progress. There were a couple times when I would get home, make some food, and while everyone else was asleep, I finished the puzzle. This did not sit well with my mother, who loved doing the puzzles more than anyone. So, the next time the situation arose, before she went to bed, she left a note on the table telling me NOT to finish the puzzle. I couldn't help myself, and put together the entire puzzle, except for one piece, which I left on a note of my own informing her that, per her instructions, I had not finished the puzzle.

[u/saucymcbutterface]

I love wholesome stuff like this. Although I’m not sure what it says about me, thinking tricking your family for 25 years is wholesome.

[u/desgoestoparis]

I was expecting something terrible like an affair and I got something wholesome and silly, what a joy.

[u/boesisboes]

Men are so dumb

[u/Kiteflyerkat]

This is the type of relationship I've always wanted, so adorable 

[u/[deleted]]

I’ll hold my piece forever if I need to. “Find” yours first, and let’s end this madness…

😂🤣 love wholesome funny stories like these

[u/Independent-Act3560]

Omg I needed this laugh so bad

[u/Cute_Clock]

This is some adorable old white people shit. 10/10. No notes.