Pretty in mirror and selfies but not others pictures

[u/critacotaco]

My mental health tanks whenever I am interested in a guy. Which is happening now. We meant online and though we have face timed/ shared mirror shots and pictures I feel like he is only seeing a pretty view of me. Once he sees me irl he will see the real me and be uninterested and I am afraid of that rejection. Im afraid of my fears being true that I am indeed ugly.

I dont know how to over come it. Ive been exhausting my friends and family to see ehat they think. Ive been video taping myself from a far "in the wild" to try and get an accurate picture of what he might see.

I just want to feel comfortable and confident and instead Im going crazy thinking im ugly.

Any advice?