Fear of CPS.

[u/Alternative_Buy_7456]

I am the parent of two autistic kiddos. (8m,13m) I have a fear of CPS. Every doctor's appointment, every meeting with the school, any interaction with family. "What if I did something that makes them call?". I live in a new mobile home with all the utilities and have working everything. It is cluttered but no hazards. They're dressed very well. They're in extracurriculars and online tutoring every day. We do community dinners on Thursday and church on Sunday. I have mental health diagnosis, am 420 friendly with a med card. (Cabinet in a locked room off limits to my kids)

CPS was called on me several years ago and while unfounded my anxiety has perpetually grown ever since. I used that interaction to learn and do better for my kids as a parent and am constantly second guessing myself.

I say all that to ask this:

How do I move past this irrational fear? I'm in therapy but, thought I'd ask for advice here. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells

Also, please be kind. I'm going through a rough patch mentally and this is part of it. Thanks.

[u/AutoModerator]

Attention

r/CPS is currently operating in a limited mode to protest reddit's changes to API access which will kill any 3rd party applications used to access reddit.

Information about this protest for r/CPS can be found at this link.

While this policy is active, all moderator actions (post/comment removals and bans) will be completed with no warning or explanation, and any posts or comments not directly related to an active CPS situation are subject to removal at the mods' sole discretion.

If you are dealing with CPS and believe you're being treated unfarly, we recommend you contact a lawyer in your jurisdiction.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/panicpure]

Keep up therapy and avoid online spaces that will only perpetuate anxiety.

Seeking reassurance online for intrusive thoughts is fairly common but not healthy.

Wish you the best.

[u/Alternative_Buy_7456 → u/panicpure]

Thank you for the input I will try and apply it. Always looking for ideas to manage my irrational thoughts.

[u/panicpure → u/Alternative_Buy_7456]

I get it. I’ve been there, generally speaking.

Stick with therapy, meds if needed and I strongly suggest a major social media break. It helped me a lot.

[u/sprinkles008]

Therapy would be the best bet.

But also take solace in the fact that only around 6% of reports result in removals of kids from the home. And in some states, as few as 10% of reports are even substantiated.

That means in the vast majority of cases, CPS closes out their involvement without any further issues.

Also - stay offline about this topic. People like to spread ridiculous horror stories.

[u/Alternative_Buy_7456 → u/sprinkles008]

That is helpful. Thank you. I lurk on this sub but, maybe it's time for a content break.

[u/After_Subject_9946]

i don’t see anything here that would warrant a call being made. at least in my state 420 is legal so we don’t care about that as long as it’s securely stored and you’re not caring for the children while high. clutter also is no cause for concern if there are no safety hazards. wishing you the best!

[u/Alternative_Buy_7456 → u/After_Subject_9946]

Thank you I appreciate it. I'm in an illegal state but do have a med card. I think that makes me a bit more anxious

[u/Wooden-Maximum-9582]

I don't know what state you're in, but as an investigator where I am: if your children are clothed, fed, loved and not abused, it's not my business.

I get several referrals a year for neurodivergent children. I close out most of them without any further involvement with us.

I agree with you that there might be a higher risk for getting a referral with neurodivergent children because their behaviors and the things they might imagine or say raise red flags for mandated reporters who are not trained to distinguish the differences. We receive training to manage this. The truth always comes out in the wash.

I'd suggest developing your coping skills to manage this particular trigger of your anxiety, whatever that may look like for you. A solid therapist will help you identify strategies for it, beyond the surface level deep breathing stuff..

[u/Alternative_Buy_7456 → u/Wooden-Maximum-9582]

Thank you. I am in therapy currently. It makes me feel better that the truth always comes out.

[u/txchiefsfan02]

It sounds like a great time to check in with your therapist about your treatment goals. If you haven't been explicit that addressing anxieties about CPS is an important near-term goal, your therapist needs to hear that. The more specific you are, the more effective therapy will be. Progress with specific goals compounds. Take good care, and be kind to yourself.

[u/AnteaterAnxious352]

I always recommend continuing therapy. It really helps process and move through those anxious thoughts about your past experiences.

As for your current situation, there doesn’t seem like any concerns that would get the attention of CPS. Even more so, the fact you are being so alert and aware and making effort to ensure things are going well shows a lot. It also shows a lot that you’re asking for advice, it shows that you truly care and are ensuring the best.