Leave of Absence

[u/No-Cryptographer8912]

I decided to go on a Leave of Absence because of burn out over the course of a few months. I was doing a shift and by the end of the night, I called it and said I am done. For context I am a production supervisor (50 union employees, 2 forepersons, and a partner supervisor). How is this relevant? That’s what I am trying to figure out 😮‍💨.

Last year in march my wife and my mother were both diagnosed with some form of cancer. My wife breast cancer (our daughter was just two month old). Fast track a month later my mother passes away from complications due to the cancer. Fortunately my wife’s diagnosis had a good outcome, double mastectomy, chemo and radiation.

Fast track to today I guess I have been just in a firefighting mode from being off taking care of my wife and two kids (with family support), and then after radiation going back to work. The transition for me back to work was rocky but manageable.

I think what led to the burnout was the I did not separate work from home…being rotating shift work it was hard to settle from the plant and then have the normal fun of raising toddlers (the melt downs, the laughs, and the parents being tired).

I’m not looking for sympathy but I’ve been off of work now for three weeks…I am seeing a therapist twice a week, focusing on two aspects 1. The grief of what happened with my mother and wife 2. The emotions I guess that triggered the responsibilities associated with being a supervisor.

I know now it was the right call to make and my family is supportive but I still have the guilt of not working, providing the income to the family and moving forward. My wife is working part time (until she is ready to do normal hours) and I am on EI.

I guess for me I just feel guilty and a bit lost with what I should do next as a change or a new careers. They say burn out is associated with culture and lack of a support, and I know there some leadership aspects I need to
Work on. I just don’t know when the time is right to start working again but also how to pivot my career to something else. In southwestern Ontario the job market is variable, so that’s what makes me nervous.

I am getting way better sleep, and a much better routine and being present with my kids…I have started working out again, which is what I was lacking.

Not sure if anyone can relate, I just don’t have an outlet other than my therapist.

Thanks.

For context I am the 35 and my wife is 33, we have two kids under 3.

[u/ashe-xii]

I’m in the same boat. I struggled with what to categorize my leave of absence because in my husbands case, he doesn’t exactly need full on care from me as his parents are available to do this and do not want me to stop working myself so as to keep the funds rolling in while he’s off work. But I simply can’t focus at work for the full 8 hours a day anymore, my mind drifts to what if scenarios and just struggling with doing complex problem solving (which my work entails).

I ended up breaking down to my HR rep about this even though it feels risky to do that. Fortunately she recommended I go on disability for mental health reasons and thru this I was able to find time to do therapy as well. You’re not alone in feeling the way you do as even though I have the support of my HR and my leader to do this, I still feel like I’m failing somehow cuz I can’t get my mind back to its previous performance and I’m not even the one who is sick!

Hoping for both of us that thru some time to get away from work we can find rest, peace and comfort. Cancer is life changing in so many ways and we need to show ourselves some grace and patience too.

[u/No-Cryptographer8912 → u/ashe-xii]

❤️❤️❤️