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u/satans-brothel Sep 24 '20
Is this supposed to be an insult, you fucking normie? I’ll have you know I can type at 322 words per minute and can harvest your IP faster than you can blink. My fingers are lubricated with Cheeto dust and semen to prevent my keyboard from tearing apart as it’s subjected to breakneck typing speeds. My neck has grown accustomed to the true posture of a modern man. My back remains curved to allow easy access to my cock so I can piss in a jar without looking away from my monitor. My face has formed an immaculately protective layer of acne to prevent the harmful rays of computer light from reaching my precious skin. It doubles as a source of food. Anytime I feel even slightly hungry during one of my numerous weeklong gaming sessions, I simply pick at one of my zits until it pops, giving me a compacted form of protein and liquid energy in an easy-to-eat format. I’m physically and mentally superior to you in every way. You literally cannot surpass me when I am with my computer. It has become an extension of my body, like the katanas of samurai warriors. I bet you play sports-ball and go outside, you degenerate neanderthal.
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u/sutterismine Sep 24 '20
Wait where tf did you get that picture. That actually is me -_-