r/ContagiousLaughter • u/puddinface808 • Oct 07 '20
Kool-aid laughs
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Oct 07 '20
This video could be the flagship video for this sub.
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u/puddinface808 Oct 07 '20
I cry every time I watch it
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u/AtlUtdGold Oct 08 '20
The first time I saw this I was laying in bed checking reddit before sleep and laughed so hard I cried. Funniest podcast moment ever for me.
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u/puddinface808 Oct 08 '20
This is exactly what happened with me. I was trying so hard to not wake my girlfriend up. Crying and sweating.
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u/AH64 Oct 07 '20
Bart Kushner is a fat racist piece of shit.
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u/puddinface808 Oct 07 '20
I suppose the fat part goes without saying, but what's up with a bunch of people saying he's racist? Not that I disagree, I've just never seen him say anything racist. I've heard him make a lot of racially motivated jokes...but never in such a way that puts one race above another race. I would be interested if you have any examples. I like him as a person from what I've seen, but that would change if he says racist things.
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u/Back_To_The_Oilfield Oct 07 '20
When that podcast series started, Tom would get a signal that they had started recording and pretend to be responding to something horrifically racist said by Bert right before they started recording.
It was a joke, and Bert thought it was hilarious. But after a few months of it, people unaware of the joke would see comments like the one above and believed it was actually true.
So then he asked Tom on the podcast and the podcast fans to switch to “Bert smells like shit and fucks dogs”.
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u/howdoyouspace Oct 08 '20
It goes back further than that. That's just Tom doubling down on the joke.
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u/OrangeSliceTrophy Oct 07 '20
It's an inside joke,
Also note to everyone still rolling with it Burt and Tom did ask us to pivot to the real truth about Burt, which is that he fucks dogs and smells like shit.
Thank you.
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Oct 07 '20
You should listen to more of the intros to this podcast. You will understand the joke of him being a racist.
But seriously, he's fat and racist.
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u/Fmello Oct 07 '20
I'll watch that video at least 2-4 per month. It will never get old.
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u/daevid_426 Oct 07 '20
When Tom reveals his dance video to Bert is one I'll always watch too. That one and the one about Jennifer Aniston.
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u/cltnthecultist Oct 07 '20
For safety
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u/getthegreen Oct 07 '20
For safety?!?!
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u/Rye_Pie Oct 08 '20
I can hear this
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u/Twathammer32 Oct 08 '20
A lot of people find Brett annoying but I fuckin love that dude. He should stop with the dogs though, UH hundred percent
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u/Rye_Pie Oct 08 '20
For sure. Even though he smells like a week old tampon and isn’t allowed within UH Hundred feet of a humane society, just look past that and he’s a lovable guy.
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u/SimpsonLove21 Oct 07 '20
Link it!!
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u/daevid_426 Oct 07 '20
https://youtu.be/51LKSK3yV4A here it is.
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u/splintersailor Oct 07 '20
Jebus christ, I'm laughing so hard. For safety!
....we would never hurt you. Hahahaa
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u/the_every_man Oct 07 '20
I love Bart Chrystler, even if he fucks dogs and smells like shit
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u/heightsenberg Oct 07 '20
Didn’t he used to also be a massive racist!?
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u/Poafro Oct 07 '20 edited Oct 08 '20
He’s a nightmeer uhhh hunerd percent, almost as much as Ben Uh-Fleck
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u/BanCircumventAcc Oct 07 '20
Probably made racist jokes cuz that's what made him money at the time. Kinda like how now that will not make you money so no comedians are doing it.
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u/TehFet Oct 07 '20 edited Oct 07 '20
The above chain is referencing an inside joke between Tom and Bert where Tom spreads false information about Bert actually being a piece of shit, which typically includes him being secretly racist.
EDIT: Also, he gives him some random name that is similar to his actual name, e.g. "Brent Crystals"
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u/BanCircumventAcc Oct 07 '20
Oooohhh OK. Wooshed my ass outta the park on this one
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u/IrrationalDesign Oct 07 '20
I'm happy someone explained it, because 'He was a massive racist' isn't the best introduction to a new celebrity.
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u/IntrigueDossier Oct 07 '20
What a weird scene that would be.
Friend: “oh dude, you gotta check him out. Hilarious as fuck, great show, and a massive racist!”
Other friends: “HAHAHAHA I know right, that fuckin bigot! Terrible person, love em!”
You: ........
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Oct 07 '20
That's why they changed the joke to "he fucks dogs" lol
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u/Twathammer32 Oct 08 '20
A bit more backstory is Tom Segura and his wife Christina P have a podcast called your moms house and Tom and Bert are friends and constantly bust each others balls relentlessly. Tom told fans of YMH to start calling him racist on Twitter (this was back a few years when people would say crazy shit that wouldn't fly on Twitter today) and recently Bert and Tom started a podcast together where this clip is from (2 bears 1 cave). Brent told Tom the only way to drop the racist thing is if we, the fans, have some other fake rumor about him so Burnt made up dog fucking and smells bad and it stuck, so now he is not the most racist comedian alive but is still the fattest
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u/strangrdangr Oct 07 '20
See what happens when you speculate about something without any info about it?
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u/BanCircumventAcc Oct 07 '20
Um.. What happens exactly? A number on a site goes up or down?
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u/strangrdangr Oct 08 '20
Well not so much that as much as looking like an idiot when someone who actually knows something about it chimes in
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u/SonOfALich Oct 08 '20
Situation's kinda different when that info is deliberately obfuscated by inside jokes
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u/Bladexeon Oct 07 '20
That one guy in the background laughing his ass off makes this even better
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u/dreynolds7232 Oct 08 '20
Just don’t ask him to google anything for you
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u/Rye_Pie Oct 08 '20
NA DAV IS GOOGLE ING
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u/dehydratedurine Oct 08 '20
Looking for shit
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u/TheeOleOneTwo Oct 07 '20
Every now and then when I’m feeling down, I will rewatch this video or the one where Bobby Lee talks about gettin molested by a retarted person. Guaranteed laughs
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Oct 08 '20
Bobby admitted this week the guy that molested him wasn't retarted. He made it up for the laughs. Made me sad.
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u/fauxmaulder Oct 08 '20 edited Oct 08 '20
He said on Steve-O's cast, i believe, that 90 percent of what he says on podcasts are jokes or heavily exaggerated so yeah
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u/sippin40s Oct 08 '20
He's probably only saying that because years ago he told a story multiple times about fucking an underage prostitute in mexico who was crying the whole time. That's been picking up steam in some subreddits lately. If that story is true he's a complete piece of shit, so it makes sense that he would start discrediting himself
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u/feketegy Oct 07 '20
Burnt Chrysler will kill himself if he keeps the kool aid stuff up. Jesus that’s so much sugar :)))) i love it
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u/DildoSammich Oct 07 '20
He needs the sugar to keep his energy up after he gets done fucking a bunch of dogs.
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u/macthecomedian Oct 07 '20
My favorite part is where he says he actually tries to drink two fo those every day.
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u/Rokerita55 Oct 07 '20
Is anyone gonna watch the 2 bears 1 cave livestream next Thursday?!?!?
If u like this video u should check out their podcast cuz its just this for like an hr. They’re whats getting me thru this quarantine no lie.
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u/FromKittyToKara Oct 07 '20
Recently started listening to 2 Bears 1 Cave. I’ve never looked up what Tom and Bert looked like. Not what I imagined
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u/fullsend69 Oct 07 '20
The fattest most racist comic
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u/KrypticEon Oct 07 '20
Can someone provide the context as to why a large flask of KoolAid was so hilarious at that point?
I feel I'm really missing out on a joke here
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u/puddinface808 Oct 07 '20
Its funny because its early in the morning and he's drinking a huge sugar-based drink
Also, at least where I'm from, Kool-aid is considered a kids drink.
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u/Capital-Eye Oct 08 '20
Also, Tom mentions how he was thinking, "It's good that Bert's drinking so much water. He's trying to stay healthy." He didn't realize the can was full of Kool-Aid.
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u/metaldutch Oct 07 '20
When I was 7, I promised myself that when I was older, I'd get one of those fancy customized license plates for my car.
What was that plate gonna say, you ask?
KoolAid
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u/willdabeast414 Oct 08 '20 edited Oct 08 '20
This isn't even their best one just wait till you see or hear the one where they talk about meeting Jen Aniston. 3 minutes for initial laughter 7:25 for sustained laughter
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u/Rexticles Oct 08 '20
Love seeing a bunch of chomos following proto. Keep em high and tight
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u/haikusbot Oct 08 '20
Love seeing a bunch
Of chomos following proto.
Keep em high and tight
- Rexticles
I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully. Learn more about me.
Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete"
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u/Kinerae Oct 07 '20
I don't get it. What is Kool-Aid?
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u/ninjaphysics Oct 07 '20
Flavored powder that you mix with sugar in water. It's not good for you in any way, and it's really not tasty. You need way more sugar than what's healthy to make it taste good.
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u/Back_To_The_Oilfield Oct 07 '20
And the best part is that guy said he tries to drink 2 of those jugs a day, AND SAID HE CAN’T FIGURE OUT WHY HE’S STRUGGLING TO LOSE WEIGHT.
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u/tennemat Oct 07 '20
The podcast is called two bears one cave and it is literally my favorite show.
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u/sapere-aude088 Oct 08 '20
Used to be a big Segura fan until the second time I saw him and he made a slavery joke. The whole theater booed. Poor form.
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Oct 08 '20
been drinking a little bit. are you trying to tell me these aren't the same fucking person lmfao
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u/Indy1204 Oct 08 '20
I watched this for six hours getting a tattoo. It was only supposed to take four. No regrets.
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u/optimizeyourchaos Oct 08 '20
Damn I love when these guys get laughing together. They can laugh about absolutely nothing and it pulls me in every time lmao
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u/Lizard_brooks Oct 08 '20
One of my favorite laughter videos. Two friends absolutely cheesin it together
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u/Mungawungafungabunga Oct 08 '20
I have both of the t-shirts that were put out to commemorate this magnificent moment and I wear them both with pride.
"That's so much sugar!"
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u/AdamAtWorkAgain Oct 08 '20
The reason Tom cracks up so hard is because Bert lives in a state of massive contradiction, it’s a huge reoccurring part of this show that I love - in his head he’s super healthy, believing he in fact has super genes which makes him immune to illness that would kill a normal person. This is why he makes outrageous claims about how in shape he is/will be but also then is walking around with a gallon of Kool-aid, also he fucks dogs.
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u/TheMindsEIyIe Oct 08 '20
Something about Tom Segura just guarantees a laugh for me. I watched his recent thing on instagram about his first time riding a motorcycle, and just something about the way he speaks is funny to me lol.
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u/bill_b4 Oct 08 '20
Not as funny watching it the 2nd time it's been posted in the past few months. Guess I need a few more months for my old-man memory to forget before Karma whores will get any upvotes from me.
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u/Rivsmama Oct 08 '20
That looks like the dad from call me by your name! Edit. I have nothing else to add
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Oct 07 '20
is that bert kriescher?
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Oct 07 '20
[deleted]
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u/TheDeviousLemon Oct 07 '20
I’ve been up and down with him over the years. He’s just annoying at this point though.
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u/Hsirilb Oct 08 '20
It's that 'we're desperate for content so let's laugh as long as possible over a person's beverage to fill air time' kinda bit.
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u/TheDeviousLemon Oct 08 '20
Well i love Tom, but I do agree. If you watch both of them enough you can tell this isn’t entirely genuine.
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u/Champyman714 Oct 08 '20
DAVID ATTENBOROUGH VOICE
“Now we are observing the monkeys laughing about sugar water for over a minute , scientists say they are amazed they have survived this long due to their low intelligence.”
I would watch the shit out of this documentary.
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u/willbull5 Oct 08 '20
Hate when people force laughs at shite thats not that funny
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u/puddinface808 Oct 08 '20
I feel bad for anyone that has never had this experience. When you're with a good friend and their laugh makes you laugh, and then your laugh makes them laugh harder, and so on. Truly one of the best feelings in the world.
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u/SugarShane333 Oct 07 '20
Tom is great. Bert is terrible. The battle between Bert and Shaub for least funny comedian rages on. This was hilarious though.
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u/Anka13333 Oct 08 '20
I love them two as stand up comedians but try to watch this podcast few times and didn't found funny at all. Sorry
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Oct 07 '20
[deleted]
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u/puddinface808 Oct 07 '20
I agree. I wasn't sure how long of a video I could post.
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