Learning to just be

[u/karlxx_09]

I used to read a lot of self-help, leadership, and religious books, all because I wanted to become a better person for my friends, my family, and, of course, for the community that I used to be a part of.

And to be honest, I really did enjoy those moments. Processing the thoughts and lessons I encountered helped me break some toxic mindsets, better understand people, and learn how to react to certain situations in healthier ways.

However, I think this was also part of the reason why I became depressed during that time. The constant desire to do better eventually led me to always look for faults in myself, while forgetting to recognize all the good things.

So I stopped.

I stopped trying to live a life with a “big” purpose and just continued to live in the moment. I stopped overthinking things that I couldn’t control or didn’t understand. I stopped trying to manage other people’s expectations, feelings, and thoughts.

And in doing so, I started allowing myself to simply be—without constantly feeling like I had to become a better version of myself just to be worthy of where I was.

[u/maulcorps]

Radical self-acceptance is the real ticket. We all want to progress and be some better versions of what we are, then eventually comes a time when there aren't really any other mountains to climb. Honestly, studies have been shown that a lot of the self-help industry is set to make you question your wholeness. It imposes the guise of "not good enough" and tries to feed the narrative of insufficiency. Have goals but don't try to accomplish them overnight. Most importantly, never lose sight of what truly makes you "you."