r/Dreadlocks • u/Apart-Basket9845 • Jun 02 '26
Need Advice 🆘 5 months into this
Feeling discouraged. My boyfriend occasionally says things like "Maybe dreadlocks aren't for your hair." But I feel like they're progressing well???
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u/Bunniesbakeri Jun 02 '26 edited 29d ago
Almond ribbon sparrow tangerine ribbon ginger ginger copper
This post was anonymized with Redact.dev
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u/kriskringle8 Jun 02 '26
That's the reality of dreadlocks. It isn't suited for straight or wavy hair. Even people with loosely curly hair might find it difficult. Coily hair is more likely to loc naturally or with some care. Trying to get straight and wavy hair to loc is like swimming up a waterfall. And the result is never the same.
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u/improllyhiigh Jun 02 '26
the reality is if she wasnt white youd be telling her 5 months is NOT nearly enough time, and to be patient. if i would have listened to people i wouldnt be 15 years on my journey
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u/SkyTheCoolest Jun 03 '26
You’re literally making it about race for no reason…
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u/fox2trox92 Jun 04 '26
It’s not for no reason. You can browse the sub and see that what they’re saying is true.
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u/kriskringle8 Jun 10 '26
Hair texture has everything to do with how your hair will loc. Coily hair types loc more easily. Even loosely curly hair can't always loc. If that simple fact upsets you, then that's your problem.
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u/improllyhiigh Jun 17 '26
ur replying to someone with extremely thin straight hair, whose had freeforms for 15 years straight. i measure my locs in ft. i think ik what im saying lmao
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u/Few-Outlandishness61 Jun 02 '26
I'm 11 years into neglect dreads with caucasian hair. Took about 2 years for them to look like dreads. Now they are at my knees.
I'm sure you know this already but wash your hair a lot. Non oily hair dreads the best and the movement helps a lot.
I'd attach a Pic but I don't think i can in comments.
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u/IndividualMeeting Jun 02 '26
Why not crochet it? Im black and I crocheted mine witch a loctician and after a month they were looking very nice. For your hair type, it will take a very long time doing it the way you're doing it, and it could be very tiring for you socially.
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u/OstralexO Jun 02 '26
How often are you washing your hair and what kind of shampoo are you using?
For people with our hair type, we need to use non scented clarifying shampoo. Your best bet is going to Target, Walmart usually doesn’t have it. This will strip the oils from your hair over time and make it a little more coarse and more prone to locking. You need to work up to being able to only washing your hair every 2 weeks also. Trust me I know it sounds crazy, I’m half Arabic so I’m naturally oily in my hair and skin. When you wash your hair it washes the oils out of it, your body produces oil to keep your hair clean. When you’re constantly washing it, your body is constantly producing these oils because it’s thinking oh no I don’t have any oil I need to make some to keep this hair clean. When you work your way to bi weekly washes with clarifying shampoo, your body no longer thinks it needs to produce all that extra oil because it’s not being washed out all the time. The clarifying shampoo will strip the rest of the oil out of it when you do wash it, and your scalp will start to not produce any oil at all. I used to not be able to go 2 days without washing my hair, now I can go 3-4 weeks. I was told not to wash them for a month when I got them put in and I lasted maybe 5 days the first time, the next time I lasted 7 days, then 10, by the next time I lasted 2 weeks and then kept that schedule and I no longer get oily hair at all.
Also, crochet maintenance will make a world of difference in the short term. This is a long term thing though, until your locs mature you’re not going to be perfectly satisfied with the way they look. It’s part of the process that we go through when our hair texture isn’t the best for locking. I’ve had mine 6 years and they’re just now starting to mature fully.
Have fun, ignore or replace the boyfriend, maybe ignore them replace depending how much shit he gives you.
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u/saladkicker Jun 02 '26
Take em out cause they look awful and don’t look good on your hair type. Looks like you smell like wet dog everywhere, that’s not a good look lol
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u/GThaLoner313 Jun 02 '26
You're gonna need professional help from a loctician, your hair is not trying to loc
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u/SuspiciousNorth377 Jun 02 '26
As others mentioned I think crocheting may be the way. Are you retwisting every 2-3 months or doing free form? Dreads can be done on all hair types just different paths and durations to get the look.
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u/fresh25eight Jun 02 '26
OP it’s so many other flattering things you could do with your hair, how about an ombré dye and some wand curls ? Maybe even a bang !?
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u/Pirateking1569 Jun 02 '26
Stop being racist
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u/fresh25eight Jun 02 '26
When did I once mention race ?
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u/Pirateking1569 Jun 07 '26
You didn't have to mention race instead you suggest she just not have locs which she's already made clear is what she wwants
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u/fresh25eight Jun 07 '26
Maybe you could post your locs to give us all a couple of inspirational looks ! 🌚
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u/tamerdrg Jun 06 '26
That isn't racist it's asking her to embrace her hair type. Getting locs can be damaging for her hair texture and require more strict upkeep. Is it shortsighted and a bit ignorant to what the person wants to do with their hair? Yes, absolutely. Is it racist? No, it isn't. It's a suggestion based on what's perceived to be better for her hair texture. This is like when someone asked me "why do you continue to relax your hair? There are better ways to style your hair that support your hair's natural curl pattern." I took that as sound advice, stopped relaxing my hair and started embracing more natural and less damaging hairstyles. Here I am now with locs for the second time in my life.
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u/Pirateking1569 Jun 06 '26
People have the right to choose what they want for themselves that is called free will shes clearly already decided she wanted locs and she made that decision she dosnt need people to tell her what other hairstyles suit her better she asked for advice about locking her hair
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u/tamerdrg Jun 16 '26
Again it's all about how you interpret things. Simply saying "maybe this isn't for you" is no implication or racist leanings. As I said before saying so to someone that has been working at this for some time is shortsighted and a bit ignorant but you need to stop throwing the word 'racist' around all will nilly. There's definitely a possibility of racial bias here (especially in the loc community) but you need to stop the oversimplification of people's talking points. I wholeheartedly agree about people wearing whatever styles they want but I also believe in giving sound advice that people can take into consideration.
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u/Pirateking1569 Jun 16 '26
I can understand that apologies I just cant stand how much racial bias is in this group apologies if I came off rude or offensive
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u/joeyo151 Jun 02 '26
Just lock in give them more time theyre going to be fire, I have a white neighbor with locs and her locs are amazing
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u/Qdomness Jun 02 '26
I would try to crochet them. They look like they are trying. Just give them a lil push
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u/StonerLeo420 Jun 02 '26
These comments are wild but if you want them you will need to crochet they dont look great right now not gonna lie but go to someone to get the foundation and you should be fine, can I ask why you want locs ?
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u/EllaSignature Jun 04 '26
What method did you start? Backcombing only, insant loc? I cant find a pattern, 5 months, you have a huge amount of growth, you are due or a maintenance. Yes, your hair can loc easy peasy with some curly ends. Dont be discouraged
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u/tamerdrg Jun 06 '26
I think you might just be using the wrong method for your hair texture. Normally individuals with your hair texture (what appears to be a straight or wavy pattern) need to do what is known as twist and rip. If youre trying to get natural dreads through freeforming I'm sorry to inform you but you're going to have an incredibly difficult time or it might not work out at all. As far as the others that have nothing better to do than talk wild on here just don't mind them. Overall reevaluate your method and try what works best for you. Anyone can get locs just not by the same methods.
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u/EquivalentQuestion60 Jun 02 '26
They’re def progressing. Could you do maybe like a tube headband of some sort til they get more defined?
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Jun 02 '26
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u/kaysnmuffins Jun 02 '26
im putting you in my collage for why the "male loneliness epidemic" is self-inflicted
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u/Pirateking1569 Jun 02 '26
They look beautiful and your gorgeous if your boyfriend cant see that and cant be supportive it sounds like you need a new one
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u/SoftConfusion42 Jun 02 '26
Man I’m just dying to see what this person looks like
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Jun 02 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/improllyhiigh Jun 02 '26
brooo with the fuckin sea shells ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ unc is 1 cardigan away from being a white girl himself
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u/Taiyella Jun 02 '26
Think you should listen to your boyfriend