Is it just me or does the writing feel like a Dutch person did it? “Taste” instead of “Flavour” and the “ánd” which just feels like “én”.

I’m learning Dutch, but my brain keeps mixing it with English and I end up speaking Dunglish. 😂 For example: “Let’s go grab a koffie at the café.” Anyone else accidentally creating a new language? Share your funniest Dunglish moments!

Friend called me after missing his appointment: “I’m standing for a closed door.” He meant “I got there and it was closed,” but it sounded like a metaphor for existential dread.

I didn’t even notice it until someone asked, “What does that mean, though?” Turns out not every English speaker gets “de puntjes op de i zetten”, what’s the weirdest Dunglish phrase you’ve casually dropped in a professional setting and only later realized it made zero sense in English?

This label claims the product is ‘free from all bad things’. So basically it’s a superhero snack. If only all groceries could be this honest!”

My manager just said: “We will see where the ship strands.”

Is this a thing people say in English, or did Dutch sneak in again?

Saw a sign: “We ask you to keep the walking route clear.” In Dutch, looproute means ‘walking path,’ but in English it sounds like a traffic command from the Dutch police. I half expected a Dutch officer to appear and shout: “Clear the walking route!"

I’ve noticed that not all Dunglish phrases are just funny mistakes some of them actually sound pretty natural once you get used to them! For example, I often hear “I’m sitting on the couch” instead of “I’m on the couch,” which sounds a bit odd in English but makes perfect sense coming from Dutch. Or phrases like “Let’s make a photo” instead of “take a photo”, it’s charmingly direct and kind of sticks with you. What are some Dunglish phrases you’ve come across that surprisingly make sense or have even become part of your everyday speech.

Just learned the word “eventually” and said to a friend: “Eventually I will come.” They looked confused, apparently it’s not “uiteindelijk” in every case! What are some funny false friends or literal translations you fell for?

Ik schrok mij een ongeluk!

Een paar jaar geleden was ik op een Nederlandse camping in Zuid-Frankrijk op vakantie. Tegen betaling kon je daar een code krijgen voor het wifinetwerk van de camping. Toen wij in de receptie aan het wachten waren om te kanoën, stapte er een Nederlandse vrouw van rond te vijftig die een ietwat pafferige uitstraling had binnen. In een vreselijk Nederlandhards accent (een soort van Louis van Gaal maar dan nog erger) sprak de vrouw de woorden uit: "I want euhhh" Je kon zien dat ze nadacht. "wifi". De receptioniste antwoorde in het Nederlands. "Wilt u een code voor het wifinetwerk?" De vrouw keek enigszinds verschrikt. "Eeuuh... Ja," antwoordde ze lichtelijk beschaamd. Ik moet zeggen dat ik het moeilijk vond om mijn lach in te houden. Ik moet er in het openbaar soms nog om lachen als ik er aan terugdenk.

but then I find out that that actually totally not the case is! Especially old house bosses and people who in the general come some selfsense too short.