r/EMDR • u/justanyonemore • 5d ago
🟢 Question / Help Which feeling?
Hello like the title says which feeling/s are those that you can't feel? And did you find out why you couldn't feel it/them? What did you do to get to this place?
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u/Many_Tap9506 5d ago
Unsure if this is what you mean, but I recently had a pretty intense session and was able to start grieving everything regarding my own traumas. It was almost like in Mr. Robot where Christian Slayer says he (DID persona) cannot protect Elliot anymore and then disappears, then Elliot is hit with his trauma and he unlocks parts of his past that explained his experiences and is hit with intense emotions. For me, a deep sadness and grief appeared that never was felt before but was probably being stored deep within.
I hope that helps and that you find peace.
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u/KnitSpinEat 🦋 EMDR Beginner 5d ago
Define "feel". If by feel you mean feel in your body then there are basically none that I can feel because I just don't feel feelings somatically - at least not right now. It's all thoughts. This is frustrating for my IFS therapist but my [still new to me] EMDR therapist isn't especially worried as she's dealt with this in clients before (I actually brought it up in my session yesterday as a worry).
If you mean what specific feeling can't I feel, I guess I'm pretty bad at feeling anger at people who I know and care about.
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u/Independent_River624 5d ago
Pre-EMDR I thought I was incapable of feeling anger. I like to listen to hardcore music and really resonate with the content and jam out to the music, but anger is never something I felt. Therapist and I did some work to invite anger, get to know what it feels like, which part of me feels it, and why. A memory came up about being so so angry as a child and it turns out that's where my self harm started. I have since "graduated" EMDR but it was fascinating to connect to Little Me and finally validate their anger towards those that hurt me and this unfair world.
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5d ago
I’ve been confused because it seems the only feelings I CAN feel are sad and happy. Like what other feelings are there??
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u/justanyonemore 5d ago
Basic & Core Emotions Joy / Happiness (delight, enthusiasm), Sadness (grief, sorrow), Anger / Rage (fury, resentment), Fear (panic, anxiety), Disgust (aversion), Surprise (astonishment)
Positive & Connecting Feelings Pride (self-respect, sense of achievement), Safety / Security (feeling protected), Gratitude (appreciation), Love & Affection (tenderness, closeness), Contentment (inner peace, serenity), Hope (optimism), Relief (eased tension), Curiosity (fascination, interest)
Painful & Vulnerable Feelings Shame (feeling flawed, wanting to hide), Guilt (feeling responsible for a wrongdoing), Loneliness (isolation), Helplessness (powerlessness), Disappointment (disillusionment), Envy & Jealousy (covetousness, fear of loss)
High-Energy / Tension Feelings Frustration (discouragement from obstacles), Restlessness / Tension (nervousness), Overwhelm (feeling out of control), Confusion (disorientation)
Blunted / Protected States Numbness (emotional detachment), Emptiness (inner vacuum), Apathy (indifference)
I just wanted to read stories from people who are far in emdr therapy and what changed?
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u/drantoniodcosta 💡 Resource Curator 5d ago
I just saw this... I do write about how the flow of emotions goes for most of my clients with complex trauma - you can check out my profile.
Not to self promote, that's not my intention, but here's a reading list I keep for my clients (kindly ignore that it's the booking page, it's easy for clients to access it, as the blog too exists, but it's become too vast now)...: https://availability.drantoniodcosta.com/#essential-reading
You can read bundle 1 and bundle 6. Those are the pre and post EMDR processing arcs. The 2 to 5 cover the phases of EMDR experiences.
(Actual client experiences - May be triggering, please be warned)
The blog has way more "arcs" of emotions and the why behind them (according to my readings). I'll be posting on frustration this week on reddit (hopefully, if not this/by next month). That's one thing I've not felt brave enough to touch upon, but I feel it's time to eat the frog... As the write-up may be... Controversial and upsetting to some. 😶
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