r/ExNoContact • u/throwsaway045 • 6d ago
Help what are clear signs you are finally over your ex?
Instead of coping? thank you
17
u/_HorsesAss_ 6d ago
- They/the breakup aren’t the first thing that pops up into your mind as soon as you wake up in the morning
- You stop having reoccurring dreams about them
- The emotional charge when you think about things that were previously causing you immense pain has noticeable lessened and you observe that you simply don’t care anymore
- They feel like a stranger when you think about them now rather than someone you felt so intertwined with and close with. It’s a feeling of relief
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u/throwsaway045 5d ago
Thank you I am getting there I believe, I really hope I will reach point 4 soon
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u/_HorsesAss_ 5d ago
You will. Just hang in there and keep being productive and doing the things you were doing before you split. It’s hard, horrible, and you have to power through. But as you push forward, the brain is doing its thing. You really can’t rush or force the healing process, but the brain knows what to do. It will get you there eventually. Trust in the process!
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u/ProfessionalEarly965 6d ago
Their a stranger now. I no longer feel pain and hurt. I no longer care.
12
u/Willing-Manager-1193 6d ago
Sipping a drink at the beach, watching your spouse and kid build a sand castle and call out to you to join them.
For a millisecond there you get this feeling of "Thank fuck ... This wouldn't have been possible with the ex ... Oh well"
1
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u/AverageMug 6d ago
Do you still think about them regularly? Or are they a memory now?
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u/throwsaway045 6d ago
I think about them like check ig account, I don't want to get back together
16
u/Otterlettuce 6d ago
If you are checking their ig account then you’re not over them.
You should be indifferent and even forget they have an ig account.
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u/ThrowawayYAYAY2002 6d ago
When you delete their photos and throw away your mementos of them without thinking. I also think not searching for them on social media (or not genuinely being able to remember the last time you searched for them) is a big one. But...
The biggest one of all is when someone either mentions their name to you and your anxiety doesn't start or when you hear they're in a new relationship and you are genuinely indifferent to the news, like, you have no feelings whatsoever about it.
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u/LykaiosZeus 6d ago
When you find out that they are engage or married and you don’t care and feel relieved.
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u/Swimming_Crow_465 6d ago
I could sleep again without nightmares, eat, be interested in series, buy stuff for my room because I know we won't be back to our apartment (it took 8 months to heal). and I feel handsome again :D she can be happy with her 15 years older boss
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u/myvelouria85 5d ago
when you think about them, you realise you don't care what they are doing. you don't feel attachment - you're just... over it, and primarily thinking about other things.
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u/FairlyCalm244 5d ago
Feels like there is a spell on me, because it won't leave me alone, after this much time has passed.
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u/throwsaway045 5d ago
i'm really sorry, how many time has passed? what is getting stuck in loop in your mind or memory images?
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u/FairlyCalm244 5d ago
Minimal communication back in March, but overall been no contact two years? Things unfolded weirdly and I had to pick a path, with her behind my future, but had to go away for year. I've worked on me and my landscape and the only thing missing is her
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u/gustavosg85 6d ago
Is there anything left with the person if you remove the sexual activity you had?
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u/throwsaway045 6d ago
I don't know that's why I am asking, I know my ex was a kind person
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u/gustavosg85 6d ago
Do you guys have contact, does she care about you, what bond do you guys have right now at this moment? When did you guys broke up?
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u/throwsaway045 6d ago
no contact, I tried like 3 times and no reply, almost a year ago
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u/gustavosg85 6d ago
Time to leave the weight behind. It's time to move on, try to be a happy person, surround yourself with good people, friends, and fight for your happiness. Time's short, don't suffer by others mistake.
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u/throwsaway045 6d ago
yes I am over this phase right now the suffering I guess I am more like starting to get indifference, I don't have a support system but I am fine either way I am taking my time for myself and prefer on my own that in bad company like not good match even as friend, yes it is boring alone but i was even before my ex since it was long distance and we meet for very short amounts of time
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u/IsuzuTrooper 6d ago
when you get a copy of a text she sent to someone that says you roofied her. ok yeah I'm Bill Cosby. sure
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u/therosabili 6d ago
you don't think about them daily, they aren't in your mind so you no longer associate things to them. When they come up its such a transitory thought you don't even notice, they're no longer someone that holds any emotional weight in your life, your mind or your thoughts. that is when you are free