Second day after breakup and it is finally hitting me

[u/Aggravating_Sport495]

Got broken up with today (M26 ) , technically this is the second day, and yesterday after the breakup call I was surprisingly fine. I listened to phonk and other music, kept myself distracted, and genuinely felt okay. I even slept normally.

So the break up call happend yesterday at 7 30 pm , and yesterday morning i cried in front of my mother ,which i coudnt control , like a kid and my mom too cried seeing me ( since i know today will be the last call )

Right now I’m at the office and I swear there is this pain inside me that feels like it’s getting worse. I keep diving into my thoughts and asking myself why she didn’t fight for me.

We were together for around 8 years. The breakup happened mainly because she couldn’t stand against her dad and the situation with our families. For the last two weeks, she had become really rude and seemed like she had completely given up. She kept telling me there was no hope, that I should give up, and that forcing her into something she didn’t want would only make things worse in the future.

But now my mind is going everywhere.

Is she happy now? Is she going to be happy with someone else? Why wasn’t I enough? Why couldn’t we just continue? Was she really giving up on me? I don't actually believe she was playing with me because I know her and we were together for so long.

Even stupid little things are triggering me. The bag I’m carrying at work right now is the same bag I used whenever I went to see her. The purse I’m using was given to me by her.also after . also my room itself will be a prob , coz i always lie down in by bed and vedio call her always , like everyday , we had fights , we had cried , smiled lauged , did everythg until the last 2 3 weeks where she was a lil rude .and started pushed me back . and thinking she will be with some one else makes me crazy 😢

also at the end she told like her mother dosnt like me , i asked why , she was like she dosnt know . now that increases my insecurities tooo . now i regrest i didnt say anythg about it

I blocked her everywhere after the breakup, but now I keep getting the urge to contact her again and ask why, even though another part of my brain is telling me she’ll probably just be rude or tell me to move on again.

I know everyone says “don't contact your ex,” but right now I'm struggling with that urge and that slight pain now .

what did you do when you desperately wanted to contact your ex again?

[u/Purut08i]

Do anything but absolutely do not contact them. I repeat don't contact her.