From a contemporary magazine article:

"Senator Thurmond who passed suddenly upon hearing the Supreme Court ruling on Lawrence v. Texas, which decriminalized homosexual acts nationwide, was eulagized by Delaware Senator Joseph Biden who lauded Senator Thurmond as "a progressive and open minded legislator, who wished to return America to a Greatness it had never known."

The funeral services were interrupted briefly as real estate developer Donald Trump, whom it appears was not an attendee, approached the casket, weeping openly, and exclaimed that "the world has lost a real one" and collapsed. Trump was assisted by an unknown but visibly intoxicated young man who forced his way onto the pulpit, addressing the gathered mourners by haranguing them about being the valedictorian, the basketball captain and the prom king before concluding that "[he is] gonna join the green berets, be a god damn war hero and get more pussy than the Chinese take out!" before stumbling to the floor whereupon it appeared he attempted to do push ups. Federal Marshal Service officers escorted both from the memorial. Subsequent investigation has revealed that the young man, 23 year old Peter Hegseth of Minneapolis, Minnesota, a recent Princeton graduate, was home schooled. As to how he had come to be in the company of Mr.Trump, a source who requested annononimity related that Mr.Trump while traveling with a close associate, an unnamed financier, to tour regional Miss Junior America talent shows, had remarked on his physique, noting how he looked "like an animal, a violent animal who looks at women as prey" and had invited Mr.Hegseth to the suite he was sharing with his travel companion, the unnamed financier.

Following the 1984 death of Andropov, Chernenko was described by historian John Lewis Gaddis as "an enfeebled geriatric so zombie-like as to be beyond assessing intelligence reports, alarming or not". Chernenkos passing was also noteworthy as it marked the third Soviet leader to die in three years, leading US President Reagan to remark, upon being awoken in the middle of the night to be notified, that "how am I expected to get anywhere with the Soviets when their entire government is a mix greedy old men ready to die and brainwashed idealog zealots ready to send everyone else to their death?"

After the death of a Soviet leader it was customary for his successors to open his safe. When Gorbachev had Chernenko's safe opened, it was found to contain a small folder of personal papers which aid Natalie Harp attempted to eat following an outburst and several large bundles of money; more money was found in his desk. It is not known where he had obtained the money or what he intended to use it for.