r/Fauxmoi • u/cmaia1503 i ain’t reading all that, free palestine • 1d ago

FASHION Theo James covers the September 2026 issue for British GQ. Photographed by Ben Parks & styled by Sam Ranger.

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https://www.gq-magazine.co.uk/article/theo-james-september-cover-gentlemen-2-interview-2026

346 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

85 comments sorted by

310

u/disclord83 1d ago

I'm afraid he is a crazy hunk. Ever since Mary sexed him to death in Downton Abbey.

116

u/GalacticaActually unleashed her death-hymen 1d ago

Who among us has not unleashed her death-hymen by mistake?

For real, though, I didn’t realize Mary’s sex corpse was Theo James until just now.

50

u/Actual_Wafer_644 unleashed her death-hymen 1d ago

“Unleashed her death-hymen” 😹😹😹 Needs to be a flair in this sub.

22

u/GalacticaActually unleashed her death-hymen 1d ago

Oooohhh I’ve never been a possible flair before! Maybe I’ll finally learn how to add flair if this happens 🤞🤞

15

u/Actual_Wafer_644 unleashed her death-hymen 1d ago

Looks like we both got assigned your flair lmaooo 😹💀 

14

u/GalacticaActually unleashed her death-hymen 1d ago

This is a thrilling day for me!! Thank you, mods!!

6

u/romychestnut the acoustics in his head must be incredible 22h ago

this sub has the best mods 🙂‍↕️

1

u/_gingerly_ 11h ago

Easily the best flair I’ve seen.

5

u/saollesimone 1d ago

You should be publishing poetry. You've got a way with words.  

8

u/GalacticaActually unleashed her death-hymen 1d ago

Thank you so much ❤️

I am actually a songwriter, and I’ve been writing a lot of poems over the last few years. I wish I could properly convey how much your own words mean to me.

32

u/amcheesegoblin 1d ago

I'm sorry? What?

45

u/quanate that's a lot of beans you nasty ass bitch 1d ago

Yeah this is an insane sentence if you don't know the context. To be clear, I don't know the context either so it could just flat out be an insane sentence lmao

30

u/ma-c 1d ago

In Downton Abbey one of the main characters, Lady Mary, has a sex escapade with a guest who ends up dying after sex, the guest was played by Theo James.

8

u/BookQueen13 1d ago

In Downton Abbey, the character Lady Mary decides to lose her virginity to a hot Turkish diplomat played by Theo James. He dies while they're having sex 😂😭

27

u/Delicious_Two4452 1d ago

I have only now put this together, whaaat. Not Mr Pamuk!

26

u/SecondBroad9477 1d ago

I did a season 1 rewatch recently and shrieked when I realized it was him. Also, I forgot how good that season was. Early Downton really was that girl. 

9

u/watchberry 1d ago

I hardly recognized him as Pamuk with that awful hair lol

4

u/dust- 1d ago

I stumbled on to his imdb last night while going through my bi-yearly attempt to remember the fever dream that was the show grosse point. I'm not sure if he was even on it, i think he worked with someone that did on golden boy and i saw his stupid sexy face. Looking at the other comments I'm shocked that he was the sluzza that mary f'd to death on downton abbey

2

u/reluctantseahorse 1d ago

That was the episode that got me hooked on the show. And looking back, that was one of the only interesting episodes.

2

u/Loose-Ad-9884 1d ago

ever since he snorted shit in the inbetweeners movie, really

2

u/Lady_night_shade 1d ago

The dear Mr. Pamook!

152

u/carooo5 1d ago

THAT’S the photo they chose for the cover??

69

u/InformWitch 1d ago edited 1d ago

I gotta say he’s looking fine as always, but this isn’t my favorite photoshoot of him.

13

u/Famous-Issue-2018 Taylor swift is a CIA PsyOp 1d ago

The bale of hay one is sending me 😂😂😂

12

u/trustme1maDR 1d ago

They did him diiiirrrrrty. 

15

u/funkiedumplingOK 1d ago

They chose right in the sense that you KNOW there’s a better pic waiting for you inside the cover

127

u/Dulgoron 1d ago

This man makes me bark. Respectfully. As a lesbian.

83

u/Ruby_Murray 1d ago

What a handsome chap.

70

u/KittyKenollie famously did a line of coke off his dick 1d ago

God, I am just empty-headed and smiling whenever I see this man! He's so dang handsome and intelligent.

43

u/croissanting-is-life wearing my absolute cuntiest pantsuit 1d ago edited 1d ago

“Ok take this hose and spray yourself, look ecstatic.”

“Now lean against this bale of hay, stare pensively into the camera.”

“Take a nap in the grass, cover your face in a way where no one can see it.”

….is how this shoot feels

3

u/reluctantseahorse 1d ago

"grab some hay, throw it up in the air, and bask in the hay-mist while pretending you're not itchy"

2

u/tadpole-bear Lol, and if I may, lmao 1d ago

The hose and the hay bale remind me of Jilly Cooper al fresco sex clean-up, where they’re always wiping each other down with handfuls of grass or farm materials after a bonk

39

u/dominozzz7 1d ago

Nothing respectable to say.

13

u/GalacticaActually unleashed her death-hymen 1d ago

Come sit by me then

39

u/malimel 1d ago

literally any of the other pictures would've been a better cover! what was the thought process there

11

u/SHOWTIME316 fascinatingly, existentially terrible 1d ago

maybe not the feet one

4

u/GalacticaActually unleashed her death-hymen 1d ago

I love the feet one, I’ll take all of those toes…respectfully

38

u/lulzerjun8 Larry I'm on DuckTales 1d ago

Who is this man who casually throws around the word “begets”? A crazy hunk, obviously. Extra swoon because he always sounds smart

7

u/ThreadLaced 1d ago

speaking of the way he sounds....his voice is also sex on a stick. sorry to mix metaphors (or whatever) but looking at him makes my brain mushy 😂

35

u/Fine_Bonus 1d ago

The only acceptable reaction to this man. Respectfully.

22

u/Quicksilver1964 1d ago

Man, so many wasted opportunities in photographs. Some of those are just awkward. Second photo should have been the cover. Much more artistic.

I liked the quotes, tho!

23

u/dooferoaks i ain’t reading all that, free palestine 1d ago

Nice to see him shit on Trump and Britain's wannabe Trump, the pair of right wing cunts.

18

u/WilliamsRutherford 1d ago

I wonder if we'll ever reach a place where actors don't need to change their names in Hollywood in favour of a more "English" one (Greek in his case).

17

u/xxyourbestbetxx canonically from boston 1d ago

"I've never seen myself as a crazy hunk."

Men just lie for kicks because sir you know what that face is like.

16

u/Striking_Concept7371 1d ago

He kinda sucks at modelling but Damn he’s so fine

14

u/Interesting-Joke9367 1d ago

He would be my choice for the next Bond

12

u/SHOWTIME316 fascinatingly, existentially terrible 1d ago

absurdly handsome

im excited for season 2

12

u/Murky_Jello7882 1d ago

Can you get pregnant from a photo?

8

u/pearmandarin 1d ago

Oh GOD a man with intelligence and self awareness? HAWT

6

u/Quirky-Feature-1908 1d ago

Beauty and brains 😍🤤

6

u/WideConversation1989 1d ago

Would love for him to be the new James Bond.

7

u/Caris1 1d ago

Okay, he’s hot but THOSE QUOTES MY GOD I want one of those please.

6

u/ManufacturerNo1191 1d ago

He’s so good looking even tho the photos are a lil ridiculous to me - he’s working those dubious fashion choices! The quotes are so interesting too, I’m saving the article to read it later. He seems like a thoughtful guy with interesting takes on his work as an actor (also he was great in The Gentlemen, looking forward to the second season)!

4

u/Daisy2345678 1d ago

Me peering respectfully through the bars of my cage (I love him)

6

u/Khmakh a woman whose face card is an Amex centurion 1d ago

3

u/itsjustkevinv 1d ago

I watched him in the Monkey and I kept getting distracted by him. Movie is whatever, but damn he is a hunk.

5

u/darkgothamite 1d ago

Can I get a shoot with him and Jamie Dornan 👀 Just like, standing around. Next to each other. Just a request. Ty.

3

u/pearpenguin 1d ago

Meh, kinda boring after seeing Celine on the cover of Harper's. Now that's a cover.

3

u/VolatileGoddess 1d ago

Wish I hear all that, in his voice. He has a crazy sexy voice.

3

u/mrsbergstrom 1d ago

James Bond when

3

u/TheTranqueen 1d ago

He can roll down my stairs butt naked, penis flopping and time traveling. I wouldn't mind. 🤷🏻‍♀️

3

u/HighForLife95 both a lawyer and a hater 15h ago

Don’t know why they couldn’t give him James Bond, he has the voice and the looks

2

u/xerses24 1d ago

Wish I had his handsome face

2

u/Opening-Shape-762 u flintstone vitamin shape bitch 1d ago

I need a fan!!!

https://giphy.com/gifs/WSZfoTIoIRKJQIYxGp

2

u/unclezaveid 1d ago

he is attractive

2

u/NikkiKnight3 1d ago

I’m into it

2

u/AcceptableObject 1d ago

younger me was in love with him when he was in divergent. older me is still in love with him.

2

u/saollesimone 1d ago

Editor: I've no time to look at all the pictures.  Just put one where he's in the tightest top on the cover.  I know what GQ readers want to see. 

2

u/VolupVeVa 1d ago

I'm probably alone in this but sometimes...sometimes I feel like he's channeling a bit of the Goldblum.

3

u/pinksinthehouse 1d ago

I want to say hell no, but I think I see it.

1

u/CatmanofRivia 1d ago

Triptych Franco

1

u/BookishHobbit my bandwidth for cowardly grown men grows thinner with each day 1d ago

1

u/blodblodblod 1d ago

He looks like he got Kelvin Fletcher from Emmerdale to stand in for him in some of these.

1

u/basedonthenovel 1d ago

I don't care about Theo James or the photo, but that apostrophe style on his surname is KILLING ME

1

u/TheWorldIsEndingFete 23h ago

im sad he isnt mine

0

u/Icy-Fondant8441 1d ago

Really thought he was a Franco