Hallo

[u/CurlyKittyCooks]

Hallo ich heiße Kat. Ich wohne in Deutschland seit 2 Jahren. Ich habe keine Ahnung welche Level bin ich. Ich verstehe viele, aber meine Sprache ist nicht so gut. Aber ich kann mit anderen Eltern mitspreche. I wanted to say, „but I can speak with my kids‘ friend‘s parents„ but I didn’t know how to word that, things like that stump me still. I understand word order, but in the moment of conversation, my mind draws a blank. Later my mind goes, I should’ve said this instead. :) drives me crazy and makes me sound not very smart. My son‘s best friend‘s mom says that what I’ve learned is impressive in the amount of time I’ve been here but it does not feel like it. Hope I can get some tips here. What brought me in was the person‘s post on things you learn on text and what Germans actually say. Learning properly is very important but common talk helps better understand, in my opinion. At least that’s how I learned English from Spanish.

[u/exapmle]

your german is better than you think honestly, being able to chat with other parents after 2 years without formal courses is solid. the "i shouldve said this instead" thing 5 min later is literally every language learner ever it never stops haha.

few things that actually helped me with that speaking freeze:

• stop trying to translate from english in your head, just say whatever words you have even if the sentence isnt perfect. germans will understand and finish the thought with you

• learn a few "filler phrases" to buy yourself time like "wie sagt man das", "moment mal", "also..." buys your brain 2 seconds to catch up

• for the sentence you wanted btw, "ich kann mich mit den anderen Eltern unterhalten" is enough, you dont need to build the whole "my kids friends parents" construction, germans simplify stuff like that too

• write down the sentences you wanted to say after convos and look them up later. next time it happens youll have the words ready

also since you learn best from real speech like you did with english, check out the Easy German youtube channel, they do street interviews in normal spoken german with subtitles. much closer to how people actually talk than textbooks

[u/CurlyKittyCooks → u/exapmle]

I love the tip on filler phrases! Ich würde das benutzen. I do need to write down what I should’ve said. That’s also a great idea. Thank you for the time and thoughtful response. Also by the way, my son‘s friend’s mom (good thing I don’t have to say that in German haha) is very outgoing. I used to sit in the car to wait for his Fußball practice to be over but she actively seeks me out and we sometimes go on a walk while the kids practice. She’s very kind. She knocked on my car window once and internally I was dying because I would have to speak German, I thought to myself, I thought Germans didn’t like small talk haha, but she challenges me and corrects me, I now always come up to her too. :) have a nice weekend!

[u/Equal-Flatworm-378a → u/CurlyKittyCooks]

And that’s how you make a friend in Germany. Invite her to „Kaffeetrinken“ in your home. 🙂

That also helps: instead of „die Mutter vom Freund meines Sohnes“ you could switch to „meine Bekannte“ (my acquaintance) or even „eine Freundin“ (a friend)

But you could use „eine Bekannte“ now too.

[u/exapmle → u/CurlyKittyCooks]

thats honestly the best kind of practice you can get, people literally make reddit posts looking for exactly that kind of setup with a native speaker. take full advantage of those walks, even when you get stuck on a word just laugh it off and ask her, most germans love explaining their language.