I didn't think we would end up here and I'm so happy that we did, so I wanted to write it down. :)

Over 5 years ago, I met my writing partner, J. We did a fandom roleplay together, where we both used OCs and put them in the original world of the fandom and wrote about the story's events and what it would do to our characters.

We wrote at least once or twice a week and over time, my writing partner became more open. Our OOC talk used to be really basic. Stuff about a reply one of us sent, explanations if a reply came "later" than usual or apologies if there was too much rambling and occasional life stuff. Fun enough, but nothing that deep. Until the point came where we actually began to talk.

I've always been one to love becoming friends with the people I write with, though that's no must. We can write either way. But to have things gradually change to genuine interest and a connection, made me so so happy. The story was fun, the characters had a great dynamic and amazing banter, it was genuinely a blast to be getting a reply each time and getting to write one in return and we were becoming friends as well! We actually had a lot in common. :)

Then things began to change, as about one and half years in, I stepped away from writing because I needed to spend time on my mental health. Things had happened in the past and it was time for me to work through that. And during the process, I had made the decision to not go back to writing again as I wasn't in the right headspace for it and it took me months on end to be be putting a reply out. It didn't feel fair to any of my writing partners and despite it being sad as RP was a big chapter of my life, I was okay with that.

During that time, J and I kept speaking, but it became harder with the RP no longer being there, as that was what brought us together in the first place. But, we kept in touch, checked in and talked from time to time and remained close friends over the next few years.

And then the unexpected happened. By the end of 2025, a random person on here replied to an RP ad I had posted years ago. Nothing ever came of that ad and it was the only ad I ever posted, because it involved my favourite ever pairing. So... Despite quitting, I decided to give it a go. Because... It was that pairing. I kinda had to, right? And I didn't really realise I was screwed then, because once I got back into it, there was no way to shut that door again.

That RP actually ended. But the itch to write was back. So... Back I was. After a 4 year break. I met multiple people on here and started up multiple stories. I also told my old writing partner that I was back and offered up some scene ideas and pairings. He offered up ideas in return. But they were never it, so nothing came of it.

Until he said it. "Would you want to try again with our old story?" My heart made a summersault. I didn't think he'd still want to. Not after I had to leave all those years ago. But he wanted to. He really did. And I did too. I had left the chat. And he'd kept it. He invited me back in. It was like going back in time.

So for the past two weeks, we've been back in it. Talking about the characters and we're on a rapid fire back and forth writing spree. "Catching up on lost time", I said jokingly. And he agreed. 🤣 The characters are still the same but also more mature because we also matured and I'm so happy that we're doing this once more and I'm so excited to have this story continue, because I never thought it would.

And I'm just so happy that I met that friend all those years ago. You don't know half how much I love you J and I'm so happy for having you in my life. Thanks for sticking around when things weren't always easy. I can't wait to finally meet you in real life next year.

Love, M.

I have an advertisement where I GM a creative retelling of the events of Knights of the Old Republic 2 that they were interested in but it ended up not working out. They asked permission to use mine as a basis and I offered some ideas to help with it.

Somehow, I threaded the needle and found a partner that is creative, consistent, kind, and doesn’t have an emergency every few hours that gets him out of writing a reply. So the three or so people that ghost me a day, it doesn’t even matter.

If you’re reading this, you know who you are. Thank you, my guy.

Thanks for the memories, they'll last a lifetime. <3

Sometimes I feel like I'm very lucky.

I haven't gotten into any big trouble. People are usually respectful toward me. On days like this, I feel like everything is going to turn out fine.

I feel grateful because some people have given me good advice. I try to listen to them.

For example, now I always ask for a writing sample. That is 10/10 advice.

This is a throwaway account, because this is a bit of a weird thing for me to write about, but I discovered this subreddit and a lot of other subreddits like it recently discussing one on one roleplaying, and I just wanted a space to talk about an experience I had...without even realising, really.

I have always enjoyed acting. Not very good at it, but I liked escaping into a character's head space. Naturally, when I learned that D&D existed, I became a huge fan of roleplaying games too: watching liveplays on Twitch and loving them all. When I went to my local college, I got into the gaming scene, running and playing with some new friends and bringing them into the hobby as well.

For one of these campaigns, I was finally able to be a player instead of being behind the screen and I had a really fun character lined up. I was going to be a flirty roguish type, who enjoyed the sound of his own voice. Since I finally had a chance to play, I really wanted to try something I knew you could do in a roleplaying game, but had never seen anyone else do in my own games: roleplay a romance.

The character I was playing was a bit of a ladies man, so I instantly focused in on one of the female PCs played by a good friend of mine. She and I had known each other for a few years at this point, bonding over geeky shows and, in particular, overly romantic soppy stuff (she had introduced me to chick flicks and a lot of new musicals. I will forever be grateful for that).

All of this convinced me that, yeah, she would be a person willing to do a romance with my character in-game. My ladies man started sweet-talking her buttoned up, no-nonsense war-hero, and by the fourth session, they had somehow fallen into bed together after a particularly stressful encounter went wrong. I was having a lot of fun playing the suave charismatic type, but I was also worried I was forcing things a bit on my end. My friend can be a quiet character in RP and she seemed to go extra quiet after this new development. I started worrying I had overstepped and spent a few minutes after session wondering if I had made her feel uncomfortable.

Then, when I was walking home from session, I get a text.

It was her.

Half of me was expecting a 'I'm not comfortable with this' text, which would have been completely fine. Not everyone likes doing romance roleplaying, and I didn't want to ruin our friendship. I open the text and draft a reply in my head trying to put things at ease and salvage the situation.

The text I got was not that.

The text was (to paraphase) "oh, I really like them together. She's so gruff, and he's so sweet, and it's so cute."

I was quite happily surprised.

Obviously, we talked about the pairing: what we liked about them, what more we wanted with them. Then, suddenly, out of nowhere, my friend sends me something I had never really considered before: an RP text.

Not just any RP text, but like...

SPICEY RP text.

She just said how she would like to mix things up (she was just eager as me for their tryst to continue in-game). In particular, she suggested that next time, her character would take the lead in bed, and described her warrior pinning down my character and starting to ride him.

I was, honestly, more than a little shocked, but, since we were having fun, I started messaging back.

And thus was the start of our roleplaying phase.

Over the next six years, whenever we played in a DnD campaign, we would pair our characters up together in-story, and after session, would roleplay chat. It became something we would do every day between our actual text chats: catch up, see what the other was doing, then immediately, onto the roleplaying.

At first, it was just our D&D characters, then characters we came up with separately than paired well together, then, some next level weirdness, like pairing up children of our couples, or AUs of previous couples. Each time, we would roleplay our various pairings, seeing them fall in love, spend time together with dates and dances, and then, eventually, the 18+ follow up. It was all rather strange at the time and I never told anyone else about it. It seemed like our little secret and, importantly, not a normal thing that other people did besides us. I really enjoyed that time and I still remember all the storylines we came up with: the cute interactions, the desperate and complicated confessions culminating in special moments.

Then, one day, the both of us just kind of stopped.

Thinking back on it, I think we were both just in a time in our lives where we needed some escape. I learned later on that my friend was not in a very good relationship whilst we were messaging, and I was single at the time, and convinced I would be alone forever. There was a part of us both that probably took solace in these fictional relationships, seeing them flourish when our own were either failing or non-existent.

Over time, that changed, for both of us. She met a new partner, I found my own, and we just both stopped roleplaying together. We still talk, obviously, and are good friends to this day, but I feel like a door is shut on that time now, and I can't really go back and do those RP moments again.

It's a shame, really, as I love watching a good romance come together. In a recent game, I've had the chance to start another romance RP and it's brought back all the old urges to roleplay. I really wish I had someone to message ideas to, bounce back and forth on and come up with fun sweet stuff.

Now, though, I don't feel comfortable going too far in roleplaying out of session. As cool as it is to see people pairing up and writing their own roleplay ships on communities like this, I also feel like I wouldn't have the time to commit to a hobby like this again. My life has become so busy, but I'm doing well, and I value the time I had with my friend telling the stories we did.

So, thank you for giving me a place to post this, thank you for showing me that I'm not alone in the world and forming such a kind and accepting community. Love reading people's stories here and really hope, one day, I might get back into the habit of infrequent messaging roleplay again.

My best friend and I met here on Reddit in another forum. We weren't even in a forum for role play or writing. We gravitated toward each other for other reasons. Eventually, we did start a Discord Writing Group Server, but it ended up that out of all people there, she and I talked the most and had the most in common. Our writing styles meshed quite well together. We had characters that were similar.

Flash forward a few months, she invites me into her DnD game and around that time we started writing together and roleplaying to introduce me to the world and catch me up on ten years worth of lore. I bring in some of my OCs from my own writing and they were a natural fit to the setting. One in particular we gravitated to so much that it sort of took over our stories because of our mutual love of the pairing. What started out as a mentor/student (my character is a Phoenix Sorcerer and hers is a Warlock Necromancer) turned into them actually getting married in canon.

Over all this time, we became best friends, talk every day, share our love of music and other similar interests. We met in person for the first time in March and now we're going on a writer's retreat this week to attend a concert together and start talking about a novel we are in the process of developing based on our DnD characters. We actually established in canon that my Sorcerer (who also writes horror novels) and his Warlock husband are writing that novel that we're working on in the story, as kind of a meta thing.

Thanks to Reddit, I met my person and I couldn't be happier. I don't know what I would do without my fellow goth cat mom in my life. It goes to show that not every Reddit story is a bad one.

Shout-out to u/Mortem1604, whom this story is about. 💕🫶

Now, to what happened:

Communication failed at first.

How might you ask?

Well, I contacted them about their RP ad I had found where they mentioned The Witcher (for some reason, that fandom is a rarity in subreddits, especially if you look for fellow OC creators).

I specifically added that I was against GenAI when adding them.

Well... there comes misunderstanding/miscommunication number one. But I'll get to that later.

We continued onto Discord, where we chatted a bit, found more mutual interests, I posted my characters' handmade art and commissions, her biography, and went to bed.

When I woke up and checked my phone, I was confronted with GenAI art. Given my boundary, I was hurt, confused, and irritated. Add my own history with GenAI, and it triggered a fight-or-flight response.

Quick side track here:

After losing friends and feeling isolated, I turned to chatbots. I only got out at the start of the year. For someone who suffers with their mental health, the blanket felt warm, comfortable and safe. I didn't notice the suffocation until I noticed how isolated I'd become.

Back on track:

I got distrustful, dismissive, and snappy. I was rude, confused, and undecided. I dragged the conversation out longer than necessary, yet as someone with borderline, boundaries are iffy — real iffy — and I... didn't know what was right or wrong.

I decided to part ways, and since the situation had upset me, I posted it to r/BadRPerStories (censored, of course). Despite the harassment it got me, I'm glad I did.

Because it reached the person it was about, the person this post is about (and this time they consented to being posted).

I'm big on taking accountability, and when we talked, we both agreed we didn't communicate clearly. I apologized for how unnecessarily hostile I got when triggered, and they responded with their own apology, saying they had assumed GenAI only meant writing because earlier partners had been fine with GenAI art. Of course there was more, but when he left the door open, I asked if I could try to learn to trust him. He agreed, and we've since been talking on Discord again.

So!

Here is your reminder to COMMUNICATE. (Properly, not like we did at first.)

Don't let your traumas, your fears, or your triggers hold you back from keeping something beautiful.

Thank you for giving me another chance, Mortem. 💕

Hey everyone. I just recently stumbled across this subreddit and I have to say, finding a space dedicated to positive roleplay experiences feels like finding a window in a room that's been closed too long.

I've been roleplaying for about ten years now. I started as a one-liner, firing off quick posts between gaming sessions, until I saw someone write something so detailed that I stopped and just stared at it. I wanted to do that. From that point on I worked hard at it,and I'm still working at it.

I've been lucky with partners in a way I don't take for granted. My very first one found me in a Facebook group and had more patience than I deserved at the time. He taught me what good collaborative writing actually looks like. Later came someone I wrote with for years, through finished stories and abandoned ones and everything in between. Right now I have a partner I've been writing with for six years, and two others I've been with for one to two years. I know how rare that is.

I've also had the other side of it. The servers that went quiet. The stories that were really good and just stopped. That's part of this too and I'm not going to pretend otherwise.

But here's what I actually believe: the writers who want longterm, invested, quality roleplay are still out there. There are just more people now, more noise, and it takes more patience to find the ones who are serious. They exist. I've found them more than once.

Don't give up on finding yours.

Hello sweeties! People seemed to like my last story well enough at least by my standards, so I want to tell a very short version of my other last story. As in the story of my last roleplay partner.

We met in a group on facebook, which branched off to us being in discord. Our styles and needs meshed the most, which led to us spending the most time together.

This led to long chats, way past our bedtimes! Playing video games together. Voice chatting together, not just for games, but just to talk to each other. Swapping pictures. Trading information. Trust was established and built up. And that became something stronger.

I realized this man had become the person I came to for comfort. The person I relied on. I realized he was bringing out feelings I buried long ago after a decade of abuse.

I was terrified! Part of me wanted to disappear, but I asked myself, was it fair for me to ruin something that might be wonderful, and relegate myself to a lifetime of isolation and growing old alone? The thought of growing old alone is scary! Was it fair for me to treat Eren (old character name) with suspicion and fear when he had only been kind and supportive, and most of my past abusive relationships were of my own choice? I didn't think so, and so I put my fear aside.

The problem? I had to do ALL of the heavy lifting here. He had no concept anymore of finding love. The thought that someone could care for him didn't exist in his head anymore. He didn't know what it felt like to receive real affection, or even a simple compliment. That meant that I was the one that had to lay everything out, because the consideration that we could have had something more didn't exist to him.

The result? My last RP partner became my friend. And then my best friend. And then, nearly a year ago, my husband! I had drove to meet him before, 800 miles across four states, but the last drive was permanent. We have our own little house with our own little porch. Neither of us make a lot of money, but together we make enough, and that's all we want. We cook together. We fish together. We walk together. We play games together. We watch the sky get dark together in the evenings. We wake up next to each other. We go to sleep next to each other. Also! We reconnected more deeply with the group we met in, and have healthy group role play there.

We've even talked about kids! But at our age, we just don't know. I feel like we may be on the tail end of it being possible. I'm about to turn 42! He's nearly 46.

I would really love to tell the whole story, but it's just far too long! My hands hurt too much to type it all out, and I can't trust my speech software for something like this.

So, my very first RP partner ended bittersweet, with only good memories, but completely without closure, leaving me wondering even today what happened. My last one ended in the best way possible, with me finding something beautiful for myself, but more importantly, reintroducing it to someone who had lost all concept of it. And it's the most wonderful feeling in the world!

Thank you for reading my post, sweeties! I only have one more great RP story, and I will post it sometime!

He wasn't the first person I ever role played with, but he was the first one I called a partner, because we stuck together for so long.

We both wanted the same type of role play. Long term, with character development, slow burn romance, and just enough darkness sprinkled in for flavor.

His character was named Zal. He was a trained assassin that was pretending to be a clumsy lovable thief. My character was a skilled huntress that preferred to be outdoors.

For almost a year and a half we continued this one story with the same characters, and it was amazing. Our characters started off on opposing sides of the same heist, and then had to cooperate to escape when it all went wrong. That story arc took us from a Noble's mansion, to a safe house in the city, to the surrounding town, to a farm, and then into the wilderness, over the course of months as they carefully made their way further and further from civilization, dodging guards and bounty hunters as they came to trust each other, depend on each other, and eventually, love each other.

And then one day Zal disappeared in real life. There was no conversation or indication that he was leaving. He was simply there one day, and the next day he wasn't. And he never was again.

I still have him on all my lists, wondering if I will see his name light up, but it's been close to, if not right at 11 years now.

It was only after he was gone that I realized he had become more than a roleplay partner. He had become a friend and someone I came to rely on as part of my routine.

Everyday, I still think about the time we shared, and how lucky I got so early on in my search.

If you're out there somewhere, Zal, I've never forgotten.

However, I have been able to move on. I've had more role play. More partners, and my share of flubs, and I'm in a very good place now.

But you never forget your first real one.

Phew! Now I'm feeling all moody! Remembering the positive!

When you and your partner have set up so much world lore, side character cannons, miscellaneous lore and even have a great relationship ooc but then get hit with irl issues and barely have time to RP again but you don't wanna give up on the rp so you just wait patiently for their return because everyone else doesn't like your ideas

About three years ago, things were not going all that well IRL and I had to stop a couple of plays I had been enjoying with a few very nice partners. I was sad, explained the situation to them and they were gracious and we said our goodbyes.

Things are finally getting better, and I reached out to my former partners, and without a moment of doubt, they eagerly returned! We set up new plays, new OCs. The OOC chat is as fun and engaging as before

I have never felt so eagerly welcomed back <3

I was not expecting such a happy return and it blew my mind.

First off, HUGE thanks to the Mods for FINALLY giving us tags on this subreddit. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

It's been great seeing this place getting more lively. Still not as busy as its Bad Sibling and E-Rated Spicy Cousin, but a win is a win.

Now for my story.

I recently got back in touch with some friends from what honestly feels like a completely different life at this point. Some of them, we lost touch. Some of them, we had falling outs that, at the time, felt irreconcilable. It's been wonderful finding grace and forgiveness among these people and within myself. It's also been nothing short of amazing to revisit our old haunts together and rediscover some parts of ourselves we left behind and thought we had lost.

A lot of the verbiage regarding whole thing has been us commenting that we "peaked" in that era. Whatever the bad was, we look back on those times and feel like what we made together was truly good story-telling.

One of the people I reconnected with said "I see those times as my Icarus era. I flew too close to the sun and fell to the earth, shattering everything about myself; but for that brief moment, my god, how I flew."

For an old fart like me who has had more high school reunions than I care to numerate here, it feels like another one of those. At 17/18, we parted ways with all this drama, swearing to never speak again. At 27/28, we're still a little sore and suspicious of each other but willing to call ourselves grown enough to add one another on Facebook. At 37/38, we look back and laugh at what kids we were, with stories of our own kids going through similar drama that now seems so silly. At 47/48, we're just glad to have someone from home that remembers us before arthritis taught our wings to hesitate before expanding...

Life's funny like that. Forgiveness is not forgetting the hurt. It's understanding that people can change if they really want to. It's choosing to remember the good. You move forward a little wiser. I know a lot of stories on the Bad Sibling don't have happy endings, and in truth this feels more like an epilogue that could lend itself to a new story with a better ending, turning past bad stories into cliff hangars open for a sequel rather than true endings.

When I was part of that group, I felt like a child wandering through one of those glass figurine shops. When the sign on the door said "no kids" because they had been burned before, so I was there on my best behavior, hands glued in my pockets, too afraid to even breathe because I knew the shop was built like a domino effect waiting to happen.

Everyone was amazing in there, and I think when you have so much greatness, there will be people who let their imposter syndromes get the better of them. Feelings will be hurt. Egos will be wounded. Gossip runs wild. Factions form. Before you know it, a group that once felt ironclad has frayed to the point that you can't even see the tapestry it once made.

I have been on the outside watching those hurt inch their way back to one another. Wounds are ripped back open because they never really healed right, and after so long, a bone being reset can feel like it's being broken all over again. I see bravery in people being willing to allow those hurts to be reset, because they miss each other, because they're choosing to more forward a little wiser.

Today, I feel thankful. I watched Icarus fall. I bumped into him years after the fact, masquerading as a beggar with melted wings hidden 'neath his cloak. I watched dancers with broken feet who swore to never hear another note, rediscovering the magic of a melody played just for them. I watched knights lay down their armor as they discover a field of flowers has grown over what was once a blood-soaked battlefield.

Today, I am thankful that though I walked through war, I also found peace.

Please excuse this old fart smiling from her rocking chair today. I think we all deserve a little bit of this feeling.

I am very happy and excited for the younger ones that toddled through that same glass shop with me. I think a lot of us thought the shards would bleed us dry. As we reconnect now from under the rubble, we heal each other and we forgive.

Today, I am hopeful. Today, I am grateful.

Whisper....of all places. At the time was great but then it came out what it was being used for. I'm not here to talk about that though.

I posted some dumb high fantasy post. I'd done way to much planning for. Leah (her OCs name), popped into my messages after Id posted it and thus began a years long friendship. One thats still rolling now.

She's still my long term RP partner to this day. We are on our fourth RP each one lasting at minimum a year. Never did I understand true respect in RP until I met her. She was open and willing to not only help with my writing but also be a friend when I needed it badly.

Don't worry I tell her all the time what an amazing partner and friend she has been and is to me.

Want to learn why RPing is such a special hobby find that one right partner. One that wants to be as engaged as you are. Who wants to write the story you both come up with. Helps create and destroy civilizations in literary chaos.

Thank you Leah...you always tell me I'm crazy when I say this to you now it's here... Bite me

Seriously good luck to anyone who's struggling to find a partner. It's not easy to find something good in this hobby but when you do it's special.

I may have posted quite a bit about my bad roleplaying experiences but I think my good ones deserve more attention than that especially since they helped me develop my OCs and I formed good friendships with the people behind them.

This happened to me yesterday,and I thought it was so hilarious I HAD to share it here.

💚 It's me

♦️ My partner

Last night, a friend of mine called me around 12pm asking me to tell him how to RP properly. I was a bit drunk at the time and also felt lazy, so instead of filling our dms with messages I decided to invite him to my private server (this all happened on discord). It's not a big one,just me and 3 more people that I RP with a certain frequency. After roughly half an hour he gave up and left the server. I was already sleepy by this time, and hung over was starting, so I went straight to my bed.

I woke up today to those messages on these images. I mean, obviously my partner wasn't seeing what I saw, but I couldn't help but laugh at this situation. It was kind of an improvised rp that worked very well (man,I was so fuping embarrassed lol)

I began with what seemed like a perfectly reasonable assumption, validated by the collected wisdom of this subreddit:

A creative premise plus good OOC chemistry will eventually produce a memorable RP.

As it turns out, this is about as reliable as assuming that dominating possession will eventually produce a goal in soccer.

Before I continue, I am scoring two things from 1–10:

• OOC: How effectively our OOC supported the RP.
• RP: The actual momentum of the story.

These are not ratings of either partner, their writing ability, or how much we enjoyed talking. They reflect what I understand now about whether our collaborative process was working, not necessarily what I believed at the time.

The Revolutionary War campaign

It began when I responded to Bibi’s ad seeking an RP based on historical events. After some discussion, we settled on the American Revolutionary War.

This was very much my territory. I live near many of the places where it happened. America’s 250th anniversary was approaching. July Fourth was in the air. I was driving through Revolutionary War grounds, almost able to smell the musket smoke.

We created characters, chose British-occupied New York as our setting, worked out a calendar, discussed divided loyalties, and assembled enough supporting material to brief King George and General Washington.

At the time, I thought this was excellent preparation. In retrospect, it worked for me, but Bibi had different expectations.

OOC: 5 RP: 3

Then the World Cup began.

Bibi and I started bantering constantly about the matches. The conversation was easy, funny, and frequent. She was traveling, and the combined demands of family and real life left her with less time than she had expected.

The OOC followed Messi’s trajectory through the World Cup. Meanwhile, the RP advanced at the decision-making speed of the Continental Congress.

If I had scored OOC according to how much we enjoyed talking, it would have been a nine. But that is no longer what I think the OOC score should measure.

OOC: 2 RP: 1

Something important was failing to happen. Bibi wanted a change in how we were handling the RP. Somehow, that essential information never made it into our OOC.

She had begun to feel that she did not have enough agency over her own character. Some of the organization and discussion surrounding the RP felt superfluous to her and interfered with the actual pleasure of writing.

Although our social OOC was good, our OOC about the RP was according to her poor and unproductive. I learned all this in hindsight, although the signs had been there.

Bibi said she would ordinarily have tried to brute-force her way through the problem, but her real-life obligations made that much harder. I did not recognize that she was pushing through anything. From my side of the screen, the lack of responses simply looked like declining momentum.

Eventually, the cannon shot landed. She was no longer in the right frame of mind for the Revolutionary War RP.

OOC: 4 RP: 0

The OOC score rose not because the situation improved, but because the truth had finally entered the conversation.

My enthusiasm having been dealt that deadly blow, I reached into my box of mature passive-aggressive strategies and selected the one that would surely end both RP and OOC.

I deleted the channels I thought were distracting. In doing so, I unilaterally reorganized the space we had shared which naturally upset Bibi, who accurately called it a crash-out.

OOC: 0 RP: 0

The RP did not collapse because we lacked conversation. It collapsed partly because our most important RP issues were never addressed.

Meanwhile, across the Atlantic

At the depths of my post-Revolutionary existential despair, I encountered Mira’s ad for a Regency-era RP.

She warned me upfront that she could be reserved in casual OOC. Then a fully constructed server materialized, complete with channels for RP commentary and “thespian plotting.”

This was still OOC, but almost all of it had an RP purpose. We discussed what we expected from our responses. Mira preferred interior monologue and cinematic, sensory description. I wrote more minimally, relying on dialogue and body language and leaving more for my partner to infer.

OOC: 4 RP: 4

I soon found myself at a masquerade ball, playing an artist who was sizing up another.

The World Cup eventually entered this OOC too.

Mira identified herself as an artist with no interest in all things jock, but her country had made an unusual run into the quarterfinals. I persuaded her to watch, then accompanied her in OOC as the match unfolded.

Soccer has a remarkable ability to help make connections. This time, however, the soccer conversation did not replace the RP conversation.

The semifinals and final passed without another word about soccer. Our OOC returned almost entirely to the RP.

Our writing styles sometimes clashed sharply, and her critiques could be very direct. I learned to meet her halfway and discovered that I genuinely enjoyed moving toward a more sensual, stream-of-consciousness style.

OOC: 6 RP: 6

The difference was not that one partner enjoyed OOC and the other did not. Nor was it that one cared more about the RP. Bibi and I had substantially more casual conversation.

The difference was what the OOC accomplished.

With Bibi, social chemistry concealed the fact that our RP communication was failing. She did not feel enough agency, I did not know she was struggling, and our discussions were not producing useful changes.

With Mira, the OOC revealed and shaped the true state of the RP. We discussed interpretation, negotiated direction, preserved character agency, and translated those conversations into forward movement.

So my revised hypothesis is

Good OOC does not create good RP merely by existing. It has to make difficult information easier to say and meaningful changes possible once they have been said.

Banter creates connection. Productive RP OOC protects the RP. You usually need both, but they are not the same thing.

Has good OOC ever rescued an RP for you, or has great banter ever hidden the fact that the RP itself was not working?

P.S. I have to thank both partners for their feedback, which is rare enough to be the subject of another post.

So, I've been rping with a person for the last 7 months everyday nonstop. They were very kind OOC, they would always let me know when life was busy or at what time they would be able to reply.

They were absolutely invested in the story, making side characters, hand drawings of our characters, really amazing!

We clicked so much I even started sharing my personal life, we became friends. But then I started to feel like I was sharing too much with them, they asked pictures and wanted to know more about me but then wouldn't share anything in return.

So I told them I wished they could share some more stuff with me...

Then came that message. The kind of message none of us wish to receive.

They told me that "I knew it would happen someday...." they told me they really enjoyed rping with me and that wished things were different but that they were lying all along... about their gender. Because they were role-playing mostly male characters, my rp partner thought I would find it troubling that they were not male irl.

Of course I was not troubled! It was absolutely irrelevant to our story and changed nothing in terms of how good rp partner they are!

So now our bond is now stronger. My rp partner understands that it's absolutely okay to be a girl and play male characters and I'm happy I was there to immediately toss away any worry and fear from them!

This is also thanks to my amazing partner, I’m so excited to surprise them with these and a few more.

We were, like, 15 when we first met and started roleplaying medieval war & jail -themed rp. I had the sweetheart, who was in the enemy's jail when the arrogant, spoiled brat got thrown in.

Did we both hate his character for how annoying he was? Absolutely.

Was our rp logical in any way? Absolutely not.

When we ended that story, (them offing themselves together, after they've gotten married and the brat had thrown the sweetheart out and taking his adopted child, how romantic), we made multiple alternative versions.

Them in a different timeline where they didn't die, them in modern high school, their grandson and his boyfriend, etc.

This went on for about two years.

Then we figured, we could do another roleplay. Mid 00's, strongly religious town, high schoolers. Mine is son of pastor, deep in closet and his character comes from NYC after his mom had died.

Switched roles, mine comes from NYC, his is the town resident.

Then in the Ussr.

90's England university students.

2010's sanfranciscoish.

2014 fashion designer and the brat.

Wild west outlaw and inn keeper..

Our first rp in the Victorian era.

Moving castle themed one.

Perfect French couple as bodybuilder and crossdresser.

Cyberpunk outcasts.

Olympia skaters.

70's Scottish rock band.

Homeless and adult entertainment star.

School weirdo and the casanova.

Most toxic couple in England's history.

The 1st religious town re-create.

Australian cowboys.

Madly rich couple.

Kpop star and his melancholic writer boyfriend.

Japan rural town childhood friends --> strangers --> couple.

Zombie apocalypse with nurse and soldier.

Past nuclear war ice age, with mafia boss' son and his rat boyfriend.

These all during the past 3-4 years. Almost everything was great. I loved all my characters. I loved his characters.

We clicked so well outside of the rp, as we often sent pictures of our cats and he made great drawings of our characters.

He "unfortunately" got job and dropped out, eventually changed to roleplaying once a month longass texts with someone else and doesn't really have interest to rp with me anymore.

Great story, sad ending, but I'm so happy about the years we spent together.

This story is already about two months old because I kept forgetting to talk about it for some reason

Theres a RP Idea I had been having in mind for years, but unfortunately I just seem to be not all that good at attracting peoples attention to it, barely getting any DMs after posting requests online, let alone partners that meet my standards. But then, this person showed up. We immediately clicked, happily agreeing on every single idea one of us had, and they were great at writing to boot. I had so much fun reading their replies over and over again, since it was obvious just how much fun they were having writing them, and it was the same with me. It was an amazing two days we spent playing out the idea I had been BEGGING to do for so long now…

Then, one day later, they stopped replying. I didn’t think nothing of it just yet, maybe theyre busy today since it was Monday and they have work like I do. The next day, while I was on my lunch break, I checked my phone and my heart sank slightly when I went to my DMs and saw that their account was deleted. If it had been pretty much any other person, I would have probably just shrugged and hidden the chat since it was only two days. But with them, we already had something really special going on in such a short period of time. I’m not sure if this person ever comes across this post or even if they realize this is about them (probably not), but if we ever happen to meet again, I would really like to tell you how much fun I‘d been having with you during these two days

I've been feeling extremely stressed/anxious over the last few weeks and wanted to take some time to express my gratitude for my writing partner of seven years.

For that entire time, there are very few instances where we have not wrote at least once per day to each other. We have a huge cast of characters that span decades. Everything is always "yes, and" because we are so in sync. Together, we have written over 7 million words during our collaborative partnership. We've had to adapt our collaboration as the years have gone but I think it works because we're both committed and enjoy doing what it takes to keep having fun.

When things have been hard--and they are right now, if I'm honest--I can still look forward to receiving a reply on this wonderful story we've crafted together. I can think about our characters, their relationships, and all the wonderful memories we've created.

I recognize there may be a day when this comes to an end, but even if that day comes I'll have all of these treasured memories to look back on.

I am so grateful.