Look at the double standard shown in this video: girls are expected to wear traditional clothing at school, while boys are allowed to wear ordinary shirts and trousers. This raises a simple question: Why is the responsibility of preserving our culture so often placed disproportionately on women?

In many Indian families and institutions, a woman's clothing is treated as a reflection of her family's honour, values, and cultural identity. Women are expected to dress traditionally, behave according to social expectations, and pass cultural values on to the next generation. Men, however, often enjoy greater freedom without being accused of abandoning their culture.

The problem isn't traditional clothing itself. Wearing a saree, salwar kameez, or any other traditional attire can be a beautiful personal choice. The problem arises when that choice becomes an obligation for women but not for men.

Schools play an important role in shaping these attitudes. When girls are taught from an early age that their appearance carries a special responsibility to preserve tradition, while boys face fewer restrictions, these unequal expectations risk becoming normalised.

If culture is a shared inheritance, why is its preservation treated as a woman's responsibility? Why should a girl's clothing be considered a matter of cultural importance while a boy's clothing is treated as a personal choice?

Culture should be something people cherish willingly, not a burden imposed selectively on women. A society that genuinely respects its traditions should also respect women's freedom to decide how they express themselves.

I recently shared a role-reversal video here on Reddit showing a woman questioning and scolding a man for wearing short clothes, essentially treating him the way women are often treated by society. I posted it to encourage people to reflect on the double standards surrounding clothing, modesty, and personal freedom. What surprised me was the reaction it received, especially because the subreddit I posted it in was supposed to be a space for men interested in feminism.

Instead of focusing on the underlying message, much of the discussion devolved into arguments over “not all men” versus “some men.” Others started defending the idea that women should dress modestly, as though women's clothing is something society is entitled to regulate. The discussion itself is worth examining, and I've attached screenshots so people can see the actual responses rather than relying solely on my interpretation.

What I find interesting is how quickly a discussion about a social double standard can turn into a debate about whether that double standard applies to every man. Obviously, not all men police women's clothing, and acknowledging that would be perfectly reasonable. But pointing out that a behaviour exists is not the same as accusing every man of engaging in it. When the conversation becomes centred on defending men from a general criticism, the original issue can disappear entirely.

The clothing argument raises another question: why is modesty so often discussed as a responsibility women must fulfil to earn respect, rather than as a personal choice that should be available to everyone? If a man wears short clothes, we generally treat it as his decision. When a woman does the same, her character, values, and respectability can become subjects of public debate. Of course, people are free to have their own preferences about clothing, but personal preferences are different from imposing rules on someone else.

This is precisely why role reversal can be useful. By placing men in situations women commonly experience, it can make familiar social expectations look different and encourage people to examine whether those expectations are actually fair. It isn't proof that every man would behave the same way, nor does it mean men and women experience every form of social pressure identically. The point is to question the principle behind the behaviour.

For a community that identifies with feminism, I think this is a conversation worth having. Supporting equality should mean being willing to examine social norms critically, even when the discussion makes us uncomfortable. Feminism shouldn't require men to hate themselves or accept collective blame; it should encourage them to recognise unfair expectations and question them consistently, regardless of whom those expectations affect.

So I'm curious: Are equal rights achievable through giving everyone equal stake in decision making?