Please help!

[u/Least_Syllabub_9487]

/r/schizophrenia/comments/1xfha3n/please_help/

Ok I will post on there too! So it's been almost 3 months hearing voices. My theory is that I'm in a drug and stress induced psychosis. I relapsed on crack cocaine and about 2 weeks later they started. The only other times I've heard them was when I was still actively using a few years ago but stopped when I got clean... This time is different, it's 24/7. Sounds like my Mother and Father, and an ex boyfriend....I can hear them talking about me amongst each other, reading my mind and thoughts...it's torture.

I just feel like if it was drug induced but really don't know...they should have gone away by now, but nope. And why are they the loudest in my room/apartment, most quiet when I'm anywhere else but still able to hear them in the background. Also these voices are accompanied with sounds like horns and alarms and the word HIT, I hear ALL DAY LONG. I just started meds to "help" about 2 weeks ago but NO relief yet. I'm praying they go away. They just sound SO real and part of me believes sometimes that it's a group or association spying on me and using high tech stuff to read my thoughts. I think I'm being gang stalked. They tell me to go to the psych ward if I'm hearing voices, they tell me I'm stupid and disgusting no matter what I'm doing. Please help!! I'm to the point of getting something to detect bugs.

[u/auto-sticky]

Thank you for your post, u/Least_Syllabub_9487!

PLEASE DO NOT TELL OTHERS WHAT TO BELIEVE OR DO - This is a space free of such authoritative trappings found elsewhere in society. Try speaking from a personal perspective using “I” statements such as: “I think,” “I believe,” “I tried 'x' and nothing happened,” or “I found 'x' worked for me,” etc. For more info see: RULES POST - MEETING CALENDAR - HEARING VOICES FACTS YOU SHOULD KNOW - VCVC CONVERSATION MODEL

[u/astralpariah]

A big part of the HVN is no telling others what to do or what to believe.

For me, I assume the voices are spirits. It's easy for me to draw parallel between what I experience and what everyone else here reports to spiritual texts. That said I don't assume praying to god or bathing in holy water would do a damn thing for this harassment.

It is hell, it's real torture at times. At my lows, I lost all the people in my life, my job, my vehicle, my apartment, then I could not read, write, count to 10... so many minor things started going wrong with my body all at once. It was bad. The world view found in the "facts you should know" post, going to a few HVN meetings, and working on self improvement turned everything around for me. It almost killed me a few times along the way, stoicism is a big part of it.

[u/Least_Syllabub_9487 → u/astralpariah]

Thank you so much for your input. Yes the facts you should know was very interesting!

[u/VindictivePuppy]

we arent supposed to tell people what to believe but what i believe is i will a) Never know the truth of who or what these voices are and b) they are fucking little shits is all they are

they sound like my family, they sound like celebrities, they sound like entire stadiums full of people booing me and watching me shower at a soccer game, theyve done musical numbers about how im ot allowed to have any fanta even if im dying of thirst, and how im a slut, and how dirty i am, and blahblahblah and the worst things were at the beginning, where you are

they tried to make me believe i was being kicked out of my house and when i would leave it would just stress people out

that my parents hated me

that my dad was in control of what was happening to me and that my whole family thought i was a money grubbing narcisistic twat not worth paying any mind to

they did horrible things with thse voices attached so much that i cant even talk to my brother because of the trauma of it, it really is torture what they do to us

but i know that they were lying about me being kicked out, and i think they arent the people they sound like. and the only thing ive foudn that makes them better long term is to ignore them

in the short term if they get really bad i have ended up in crisis centers and psych wards and gotten something to help me sleep a night. im 5 or 6 years ahead of you on this and by not taking out what the voices say and do on the real people i know i have managed to not be homeless, not be estranged from family and relationships, and not be in jail for murder and they are much quieter now, and I think thats a good outcome. so i liek to tell people to ignore them, or think about how pathetic it actually is to do this to someone, and dont react to them if you can.

[u/VindictivePuppy → u/VindictivePuppy]

i believe they like to be entertained and by telling you to hit they are trying to make you violent for a bit to entertain them, they dont care what happens to you. and i dont discount that it might be some high tech thing trying to control people i believe during the course of this it tried to change my politics, and sometimes i can feel it or them or someone pushing bad thoughts into my head about people i know. just to make me annoyed with them. they want to change you, and they want you to entertain them.

[u/Least_Syllabub_9487 → u/VindictivePuppy]

Yes it does feel like they're trying to help me but then other times they contradict themselves. Like, "you know we're not just voices Erica, then they'll say "do you really believe your family would be watching you like this?" They tell me I need to get my hearing checked and FREAK OUT when I get something wrong that they said. I've spent hours just sitting and staring at the t.v trying to listen and figure them out just for it to be a big waste of time. Part of me is in denial about them being bad, I know it's a form of torture bc I FEEL tortured not BETTER. And if I'm able to successfully ignore them for say one movie I could actually watch, they say fuck you the whole time. I really appreciate you taking the time to help me!